The Lonely Heart (22 page)

“I know you don’t want to leave,” Isaiah said. “I don’t either. But it won’t be forever, promise. There are…” Isaiah paused and sighed. How could he explain something like this to a ten-year-old? Isaiah took a deep breath and tried, anyway. “Some people don’t like people like me and Grady.”

Josh wrinkled his forehead in confusion. His little nose scrunched up with the expression.

“Grady and I… Well, it’s not common…” Isaiah bit back a curse.

“Look at me, Josh.” Grady once again came to his rescue. Dang it, how the heck was Isaiah going to get along without Grady to help him out? Despite the lack of kids in his life, Grady showed far more developed parenting skills than Isaiah on a frequent basis.

“What Isaiah is trying to say is that people don’t like things that are different. And they really don’t like people who are different. I think you know what I mean about that. In this case, it’s normal for a boy and girl to like each other. Not two boys. People don’t approve of our little family. They think a little boy should have a mom and a dad, not two dads.”

Josh pulled back, hands moving, echoing both Grady and Isaiah’s earlier thoughts.

“
Why should they care?”

“They just do,” Isaiah said. “They’re causing trouble over it. And as much as I hate it and think it’s very, very wrong, there are things they can do about it. It’s possible they could even get you taken away from me.”

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That thought clearly lit a small flame of panic in Josh, shown in his face and the almost frantic movements of his hands.

“I won’t let that happen,” he assured Josh. “But it means we’ll probably have to leave and find somewhere else to live. For a while, anyway.”

That panic grew, his hands moving until Isaiah couldn’t follow the flow of thoughts anymore. Josh squirmed, forcing the two men to either put him down or drop him. Once back on the ground, Josh stomped one thick snow boot on the carpet. His face contorted into a mulish scowl.

“I know you don’t want to leave,” Isaiah said. “I don’t either. But—”

Josh shook his head again, lower lip shoving out. He stomped his foot again.

A sudden surge of frustration caught Isaiah by surprise. Damn it all, did Josh think he
wanted
to do this? Isaiah was hurting just as much as Josh was. He’d just got Grady, and now he had to give him up. All because some utter bastards couldn’t leave well enough alone, couldn’t accept a gay couple in their midst, particularly one raising a child.

“Josh—”

Isaiah found himself the recipient of another venomous glare, one that lasted mere seconds before Josh whirled around and ran from the room. Isaiah met Grady’s eyes as they heard pounding on the stairs, then the slamming of a door.

“I guess I should go talk to him,” Isaiah said.

“I’m not sure what else there is to say, Isaiah,” Grady replied. “You’re both leaving, none of us likes it, what good will more talking do? Give him some time. He probably just wants to be alone for a while right now. I know I do.”

“Grady—”

Grady shook his head, taking a step back when Isaiah reached for him again. “No. I know this is the right thing to do. I know you both have to leave. But I don’t have to like it and I’m more than entitled to wallow in my misery for a while. You don’t need to see that.”

Grady vanished into the hallway after Josh. Isaiah dragged his hand down his face.

Damn it. He wished for an instant that he was Josh’s age. Then he could just throw himself onto the floor and have himself a major temper tantrum, complete with kicking feet and screamed denials until his voice gave out.

He was an adult. He had to act like one. No matter how much he didn’t want to.

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Isaiah was a doer, though. Oh, he tried. Somehow, he managed to keep himself confined to the study for a whole thirty minutes. Then his resolve broke and he tramped upstairs to find Josh, to at least give him a big hug. Maybe they’d feel better if they could just have a big cry together.

He was halfway up the stairs when he froze, earlier panic giving way to utter fury.

What the hell was he doing? His only excuse—no, there was no excuse. They weren’t wrong, the good people of Edmonton were, and it wasn’t like Isaiah to give up without fighting back. Damn, Grady’s pessimism must have rubbed off a bit. After all that work, getting Josh set up in a good school and pinning Grady down into a relationship, rebuilding his life around a new family unit, was he really just going to turn tail and run at the first rumblings of trouble?

Hell, no. Okay, grab Josh first. Then find Grady. Comfort his guys, make a plan. He could do this. They could figure out something, find some leverage. Grady’d lived here his whole life. Surely he had some dirt on the right honourable mayor. And the Sheriff, Isaiah knew first-hand that the Sheriff was a good man. A bit stiff-necked, a bit old-fashioned, but a good man nonetheless.

Information. He needed information. If Social Services did get involved, what were his rights? Heck, for all he knew, he could be panicking over nothing. Could be that the government couldn’t care less about Josh living there, with them. A new sense of determination washed over him and he straightened, finishing the trek to the second floor.

“Hey, Josh?” Isaiah called from the doorway of Josh’s room. It looked so different from even a few weeks ago. A thick comforter with a printed scene of running horses had replaced the old blanket Grady had used before. Posters were plastered all over the walls, horses and cowboy portraits. The Duke stared out over the desk from an old movie poster. Isaiah didn’t even know where Josh had got most of them, but they painted a clear image of the boy his brother had become.

The low glow from the table lamp illuminated a huddled pile of covers on the bed.

Isaiah flicked on the overhead light. “Josh, you wanna talk?”

Stupid question. Of course Josh didn’t want to talk, even if he could. Isaiah had never seen his brother so angry. Worse than the anger, though, had been the hurt.

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Isaiah sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Look, we handled that all wrong downstairs. Grady and me, I mean. We both panicked and jumped to worst-case obsession and—”

It suddenly occurred to Isaiah that he might as well be talking to a wall. He moved across the room, strides jerky. He leaned over to yank back the covers. “Josh, will you just…”

He stared in consternation, having trouble processing what he was seeing. Empty sheets, not even the imprint of a little body.

“Grady!” he bellowed.

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Grady had never heard quite that tone of sheer hysteria in Isaiah’s voice. He dropped his glass in the sink, not even caring when it shattered. He pounded up the stairs and rounded the corner to find Isaiah standing beside Josh’s bed, one edge of the covers in his hand.

“He’s not here,” Isaiah burst out, breath rapid and a touch ragged. “He went upstairs, I know he did, but he’s not here!”

“Calm down, Isaiah.” Grady did his best to try to soothe Isaiah, despite the fact that his own heart rate increased in sheer fright. “No need to panic just yet. Let’s check the stables and the bunkhouse before we get all worked up. Heck, let’s start by checking the rest of the house first.”

Isaiah took a couple of deep breaths, visibly trying to regain some semblance of equilibrium. “Right. Check the usual places. I’m sure he just went to hide out with the horses.

It’s what he does, right?”

“Right. You head out there. I’ll check the rest of the house and give the boys a call.”

Isaiah was down the stairs and out of the door before Grady could finish his sentence.

Grady stopped by their—his—room for his cell phone, dialling as he walked quickly through the house.

“Yo.”

“Tommy, is Josh over there?”

“No, why?”

“Isaiah’s checking the barn, but he’s AWOL. We told him…well, he was really upset.”

“On the way. Joseph!”

Tommy hung up, leaving the sound of his roaring shouts ringing in Grady’s ears. Just the knowledge that the boys were on their way to help look eased some of the tightness in his chest.

That tightness came back with a vengeance, though, when he finally tracked Isaiah down in the main barn. Grady wordlessly handed over Isaiah’s coat, which he had left behind in his mad dash. The barn creaked and groaned as the wind battered the siding. It www.total-e-bound.com

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looked like a snowstorm was moving in. Grady finished zipping his coat and pulled his gloves out of his pockets.

“No luck?”

Isaiah shook his head, jaw clenched and eyes frantic.

“All right, the boys are on their way. I’m gonna make a couple of calls.”

“Who the hell are you gonna call?”

Grady bit his lip. “Isaiah—”

“No! Hell no! They’re to blame in the first place!”

“Isaiah, if he is out there in this, we’re going to need everyone we can get.”

Isaiah shoved his arms into his coat and stalked to the door of the barn. “Do what you want. I’m not just sitting here.”

“You need to wait. We don’t have the first clue where to look,” Grady argued. “You won’t do Josh any good running around blind.”

“And I’m not going to just stay here while he’s out there, cold and lonely and probably lost!”

Tommy walked out of the gloom and wrapped one big arm around Isaiah’s shoulders, pulling him close. “It’s okay, boss. We’ll find him, I swear.”

Micah entered behind Tommy, stomping snow off his boots. “I’ve got a couple of horses saddled. We’ll scout around, see if we can’t find some kind of trail before the snow starts dumping. Joseph is checking over the snowmobiles.”

“Thanks, Micah.”

Grady understood Isaiah’s distress, he really did. Grady felt the same. The thought of Josh outside in the path of an incoming storm, alone and hurt, made bile rise in his throat.

But the only way to make sure their kid got home safe and sound was to keep a cool head.

Isaiah’s judgement was shot all to hell right now, so it was up to Grady to be the logical one.

Grady had to pull off one of his gloves to dial the number. “Lydia, it’s Dillon Grady.

Put Sheriff Thompson on the phone, please.”

“He’s not taking your calls.” Lydia Mathesin, Everson County Dispatcher, sounded apologetic when she imparted that particular bit of not unsurprising news.

“Lydia, I don’t care what sort of issues that jerk has—I’ve got an emergency out here.”

“Grady, I can’t—”

“Josh Preston is missing.”

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“Oh. Just one minute.”

A click sounded and Grady waited impatiently, but he already felt a bit better. If he knew anything about Lydia, she was already calling up the rest of the volunteer search and rescue team. And probably everybody on her Christmas card list for good measure. The woman was close to a saint with a heart of gold. It reminded Grady that not everyone in Edmonton hated him. Some people were actually decent and didn’t give a shit who you slept with.

“Thompson.”

“Sheriff, this is Dillon Grady.”

“I told Lydia—”

“Don’t be an ass,” Grady interrupted harshly. “I’ve got a missing kid and no time for bullshit.”

The Sheriff might be a prick and one of the people who instigated the whole mess, but he wasn’t heartless and he was good at his job. He agreed to call in his deputies and head their way, but made no promises.

“The weather’s already getting nasty here and it’s coming your direction. I don’t have enough equipment to get my whole department in.”

“We’ll take whatever we can get,” Grady assured him. “Thanks.”

“That’s my job,” Thompson said gruffly. “Besides, he’s just a kid.”

Grady hung up with a relieved sigh. Tommy and Micah were watching him with anxious expressions. Isaiah was nowhere to be seen.

“Backup’s on the way. Where’d Isaiah go?”

“To help Joseph with the snowmobiles.”

“All right.” They only had two. Horses worked just as well most of the time. “You two head out and take a look. I’ll try to keep Isaiah from doing something stupid.”

* * * *

By the time Thompson pulled up—lights on his SUV casting eerie blue and red shadows over the snow-covered ground—Grady sported a sore jaw and a black eye and Isaiah’s knuckles were bruised. But Grady had won the argument and Isaiah was still on the ranch, so Grady wasn’t complaining.

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The Sheriff nodded to them and listened carefully while they explained what had happened. Micah and Tommy had found tracks—boot prints, unfortunately—heading west.

Grady wished like hell Josh had at least taken one of the horses. It would have provided some extra warmth to the skinny little boy. They’d followed Josh’s prints about a mile before the increasing wind had wiped the land clean. With the snow now falling in fat flakes, any chance of following a trail had vanished. The darkening clouds moving in slow procession overhead created a false twilight that soon dropped a gloom around the buildings that no lights could pierce.

The yard quickly became crowded with vehicles of all kinds. A couple of the local ranchers even showed up on horseback. Grady was actually a bit surprised by how many people had arrived. But then again, maybe he shouldn’t be. They might hate his guts and, by extension, Isaiah’s, but all bets were off when a kid was involved. And with Josh, well, he had a knack for making friends. Few people could resist his bright smile and easy charm.