The Lone Alpha Unleashed: A Big Girl Meets Bad Wolf Romance (3 page)

James tensed, but didn’t reply.

“Chill out Dan, take it easy,”
said Darla, placing a supportive hand on the younger shifter’s shoulder. Dan
shook her hand off and pushed her away with more force than was necessary.

I could hear the low purr of a
growl at the back of James’ throat. I didn’t like where this was going. There
was something in the air. An aura of impending violence that chilled me to the
core.

James stood still for a moment,
before making a last attempt to defuse the situation before it went too far.

“I’m sorry Dan. I’m sorry about
Joseph. Know that I tried to save him. Know that I will forever regret being
too late. But at least I tried, which is more than I can say for you. Hate me
all you want… I’m not going anywhere.”

James faced the younger man, his
arms spread wide in invitation.
I’m right here, take your best shot.

Dan looked around nervously. He
was clearly outmatched, but refused to back down. When he had first confronted
us much of the pack had stood with him, united in their support. But now, this
support had waned and few seemed willing to back him up. This just to make him
angrier.

“Shift damn you,” he growled at
James.

“I don’t need to. Not for a
whiny bitch like you.”

“Please don’t do this, he’s just
a kid. Let’s get out of here. I… I want to go home. Please James.” It was a
desperate attempt to end the standoff and it failed spectacularly. When James
turned to face me Dan took the opportunity to shift and hit the ground running.

Oh God
. Scrawny kid or
not, the wolf that leaped towards James was still fearsome to behold. And yet
James swatted him aside as if he were a fly. Before the young wolf could
recover James was on top of him. He shoved a knee into the wolf's rib cage and
was rewarded with a pained yelp as he leaned forward, putting his weight on it.
Both of his hands went to Dan’s neck, his muscles straining as he pinned his
head to the ground, keeping his snapping and snarling jaws at a safe distance.

Dan kicked out
desperately, his claws raking James’ legs, shredding jeans and skin. James
reacted by pushing downwards, applying more force to Dan’s exposed ribs. I
winced as I waited for the sound of broken bones, but Dan stopped fighting back
before it came to that.

“Yeah, I was too late… and
that’s on me. What’s your excuse? You were right here watching. You were right
here when Joseph died and you did nothing. His death isn’t on me, it’s on you.
It’s on all of you.”

James eased back and the young
wolf struggled out from under him and backed away, limping. The rage was still there,
but now it was tinged with a mix of emotions. Fear, pain, but most of all
shame.  I could sense it from the entire
pack, but from Dan it was overwhelming. The fact that James hadn’t even needed
to shift to take him down could only have added to this.

“You are no longer part of this
pack. If you’re here when I return I will snap your worthless neck.”

It was a promise, not a threat
and I felt like perhaps I was seeing the real James for the first time. This
was James the fighter. James the alpha and pack leader.

I wasn’t sure I liked what I
saw.

- X -

We drove down the mountain in
silence. I was struggling to get my head around all that had happened. James
just looked hurt and confused. He clearly had no idea what was bothering me.

Somewhere on the road back to
civilization my cell phone came to life with a cacophony of rings and chirps
indicating the volume of missed calls and messages that awaited me.

My real life was making its
presence known. Real people were worried about me. No one knew where I was. I
glanced across at the man sitting next to me. His phone, if he even had one,
was silent.

“Pull over.”

“What here?” He eased off the
gas and drifted to a stop at the side of the rode.

“We passed a motel a mile or so
back. I need a shower and we need to talk.”

- X -

“Is it about Dan? I’m sorry you
had to see that. “

Sorry I had to see it, but not
sorry it had happened. The truth was I wasn’t sure how I felt about his
confrontation with Dan. It seemed unnecessarily cruel, but I couldn’t escape
the fact that seeing James act as he did gave me a bit of a thrill as well.
Outside of the bedroom (or a mattress on the back of a pickup for that matter)
it was the most I’d seen him act like this alpha wolf he claimed to be.
Witnessing his confidence and decisive judgement, I began to understand his
potential as a leader.

I perched on the edge of the
bed, not daring to look him in the eyes as I spoke, “No, not about that. I want
to talk about us. What we’re doing here and what comes next.”

He flashed me an infuriatingly
cocky grin, “I seem to recall someone mentioning a shower.”

I felt a momentary twinge of
longing in my loins at the memory of our first shower together, but I tried to
keep it under control. This thing, this freaky bond between us, didn’t help.

After his hunt and confrontation
with Dan it was clear that James was still buzzing. I could smell it on him. A
heady mix of testosterone and adrenaline. He wanted me. He wanted to take me
and make me his. He wanted to claim me as a prize. And I wanted him to. It was
all I could do to not just lie back and spread ‘em right then and there.

As much as I wanted to blame
this need on some kind of freaky shifter voodoo, I knew that was only part of
it. More than anything, it was the simple fact that he saw me as any kind of
prize to begin with. No one had ever felt that way about me before. No one had
ever wanted me the way James wanted me. And as much as that fuelled my desire,
it was also going to make the exchange we were about to have hurt that much
more.

“I’m not joking James. What
next?”

He spread his hands in
supplication, “I wasn’t really thinking that far ahead. I thought we’d stay at
the camp for a while and then…”

“That’s my point. What does ‘a
while’ mean. I have a job. I have friends. I have a family. I can’t ignore that
for an extended vacation at Camp Werewolf Trailer Park. I don’t want to spend
the rest of my life sleeping on a stolen mattress in the back of a truck”

“They need us Carrie. It won’t
be for long, but I can’t just walk out on them.”

“They don’t need
us
. They
need you. I don’t belong there. I can never belong there. I can never be part
of your pack.”

It was clear from his wounded
expression that this hadn’t even occurred to him and I felt myself growing
angry. Not because I couldn’t be with him, but because he hadn’t even
considered it. He was content to live in the moment indefinitely.

“We belong together Carrie. You
can feel that too, right? You belong with me. Maybe once I get everything
sorted out here we can…” He faded off. He didn’t have an answer.

“And then what? Sure, I feel it.
You know I do. But I can’t live in your world. Are you willing to live in
mine?”

His face darkened. He wasn’t
used to being challenged. I think he also sensed that I was leaving a lot of what
was bothering me unspoken. The fact that he killed for a living. The fact that
he was on some sort of crusade against those that had wronged him in the past.
A crusade that, for all I knew, could last years.

“I have to get this pack back on
their feet. They’ll wither and die if I don’t. And then… it’s complicated.
There are some loose ends. Unfinished business I need to take care of. And
then…”

“You’ll look me up? Assuming you
don’t get yourself killed in the meantime, you’ll come look me up and you’ll get
a real job and settle down in the suburbs? There’s a pretty nice dog park a
couple of blocks away from my apartment.”

I was pushing him and being a
bit of a bitch about it. Right then I needed him to react. I needed him to show
some kind of awareness about us and our future together beyond the next five
minutes.

“Why are you acting like this?
We both know we’re meant to be together. I don’t have all the answers, but
we’ll find a way to make it work.”

He was pacing as he spoke. Back
and forth like some sort of caged animal. I felt the urge to laugh. In my world
that’s exactly what he would be, but instead I burst into tears. I felt as if
my new found strength, the confidence I’d built up over the last few days with
this amazing man who couldn’t get enough of me, was fading. He seemed oblivious
to my concerns.

Maybe when you can turn into a
wolf and live off the land with an extended family who worship the ground you
walk on, you can afford to adopt a devil-may-care attitude towards the future.
But for the rest of us? There were things I wanted out of life. To love and be
loved? Of course. But I had more practical needs. I needed to pay bills. I
needed to eat. One day I hoped to own my own home… to start a family.

“I saw you with the pack. I saw
the way you look at them. You were… you are… so strong, They aren’t even yours
and I just know you’d die to protect them. I can’t even imagine what sort of
father you’d be. The lengths you’d go to for your children. And then I ask
myself can we even have kids? Are we different species? Is it even possible?”
My voice cracked as I spoke. I’d never even talked about kids with Mitch, my
ex-fiance, I knew he wasn’t crazy about the idea so I just kept my mouth shut
for fear of scaring him off. I knew I wanted a family though. A big family. I
wanted so many kids, I couldn’t keep track of them all. When I was growing up
it had just been me and my Dad. Every birthday. Every Christmas. Every
Thanksgiving. It had just been the two of us. I wanted more than that for my
own family.

“And if we can, will they be
like you or will they be like me? Could you live with that? No little wolf pup
to grow up just like you and take over the pack when you’re too old to fight.
Just a regular little snot nosed brat with a killer for a Daddy”

He stood in silence, unable to
answer.

I felt sick. This morning this
man had worshipped me like a goddess. But I couldn’t be happy with that. One
day. It had taken me one day to screw things up. I’d thrown everything in his
face as if I were hellbent on sabotaging my own happiness and he just stood
there and took it in silence.

That was the worst part of it
all. I wanted him to yell at me. I wanted him to fight back. But his lack of
response was all but an acknowledgement that I was right. I was right about everything
and this was never going to work.

I was angry at myself. I was
angry at James. I was angry at the universe. Too frustrated for tears, I
grabbed a towel and headed into the bathroom.

- X -

He came to me as I stood under
jets of hot water. He came to me just as I had come to him a few days earlier.

“Carrie I…”

“Don’t. Don’t say anything. Just
fuck me.”

I knew it was over. As the hot
water calmed me, I had realized that my earlier meltdown was nothing more than
a feeble attempt to drive him away. To burn my bridges in anger so I wouldn’t
be faced with the pain of saying goodbye. But I still wanted him. I wanted to
feel him inside me one last time.

It seemed fitting that our roles
were reversed from our first encounter. I stood facing the wall, head bowed
beneath a constant stream of water, as he stepped into the shower behind me.

I could feel my body come alive
even at the anticipation of his presence.

I felt his hands first. Large,
rough, interrupting the streams of water that ran down my back as he pressed
firmly against my flesh with splayed fingers. And then upwards to my shoulders,
resting on them, his thumbs rolling over tight muscles. I gasped with pleasure
and resisted the urge to squirm against his grip and push backwards. I wanted
more of him, but I was content to allow him to dictate the pace.

His hands moved out and
downwards, pressing against my sides and following the curve of my waist until
they reach the outward flare of my hips. Slippery with soap and steam, every
movement drove me crazy with desire. Whatever turmoil my head was feeling was
drowned out by the needs of my body.

He held me there for a moment
and I could no longer help myself. I tried to push myself backwards against
him, my hips twitching, but his grip was too firm. I wanted more, but I also
wanted this to last forever. The sweet torment of denial almost more than I
could bear.

I whimpered, I whined and
finally I begged.

“Please… please I want you.”

After what seemed like an
eternity, he stepped forward. His hands sliding upwards again, and wrapping
around me to find and cup my breasts. His manhood, hot and hard, rested against
my fleshy cheeks, jutting upwards into the small of my back.

I moaned again at the sensation
and was unable to control the rhythmic movement of my hips as I desperately
tried to coax him inside. But it was no use, even raised on my toes, I wasn’t
tall enough. Once again, I was at his mercy.

His legs between mine, he
lowered himself, lifting me as I was impaled and filled by his shaft. I
screamed, a rough, raw outpouring of emotion as thrust inside me.

“Harder,” I ordered, and he
obliged. Slamming into me with such force that it lifted my feet from the
ground, the weight of my body supported by his strong arms. He was relentless,
a force of nature. Each stroke adding to the knot of pleasure building deep
inside my stomach. A knot that slowly unravelled, opening like a flower until
it exploded like a white hot light inside me.

When I climaxed it shook my
entire body. I cried out in great gasping sobs as jagged spears of pleasure
lanced through my entire body.

- X -