The Light Who Shines (40 page)

As I lean in close to her, I breathe in the smell her rich,
living blood, and the soft staccato of her heart fills me with joy. I sit back
and wonder how I am ever going to have the strength to let her move forward
into this very dangerous chess game that is laid out on our table.

Bluebell Kildare: June 8 – June 9, 2022, Red Ages

I became aware of the glow of souls around me and voices that
seem far away. I try to concentrate on them, but the clearer the voices get and
the closer the souls seem, the more distinctly I feel the throbbing pain in my
back. I dive back into the darkness.

I again become aware of noises, including a persistent beeping.
My back is a constant knife of pain. I feel softness underneath me. I move my
fingers slightly. It feels like cotton. I must not be in the room any more. How
did I get out of the room? I was sure I would die in that room. I think about
lifting my head or speaking, but I am too tired and in too much pain. I seek
oblivion again.

I hear noises again. The pain is less now. I see a light
shining through my eyelids. I know the light will be bright if I open my eyes.
I can tell I am lying belly down with my face turned sideways on a mattress. I
blink my eyes open, but the light hurts them. I close them again. I try to
squint them so I can see through the slits. My mouth is so dry. I hear
something move slightly next to me. I feel two souls in the room with me. One
is a strong soul and solid and good. But I feel emotions of pain and shame and
love. I recognize that soul, and suddenly I feel safe. The other soul puzzles
me. I’ve never felt that soul before, but somehow it seems familiar.

“Jack,” I croak.

Jack leans close to my ear and says, “Yes?”

“Water?” I beg.

Jack says, “I can’t give you water while you’re lying down
like that. It will just pour onto the bed. I don’t think you should move yet.
I’ll get some ice from the nurse. You can suck on some ice cubes.”

The thought of ice cubes sounds glorious.

I feel Jack’s soul move away, and I mourn the loss. I let my
eyes close again. Then his soul reenters the area. “Blue?” he calls softly.

I open my eyes and smile. “Sorry, the light is bright.”

“Not as bright as your light.”

I puzzle at that. Jack pulls down the shades, then sits down
again and gently slips an ice cube between my lips.

I push it to the inside of my cheek and thank him. I’m so
tired and weak, but I want to stay awake for a few minutes. There are things I
need to know.

“Blackwater?” I say through the ice cube.

Jack says, “Dead.”

I grow worried and ask, “Not by bloodlust?”

“No, there was no time. Your heart had just stopped. I had
to force my blood into you to bring you back.”

“Thank you. Is Varg okay?”

Jack chuckles and snaps his fingers. Suddenly I see a furry
face lying on my bed next to my pillow. The second soul! I smile so hard my
chapped lips crack. I want to pet him, but I don’t have the energy to lift my
arm.

Jack says, “He found the entrance to the crypt when we were
looking for you. Then he ran after the ambulance. He somehow made it into the
surgery room with you, and he has been lying under your bed the whole time you
were out except for a few quick trips outside. Alexis has been stopping by once
a day with food and water for him and blood for me.”

I smile at this again. Then I lick my lips, still feeling
parched. “Ice cube?” I ask.

Jack slips another one between my lips. He lets his finger
linger on my bottom lip and traces it back and forth. Then he withdraws his
hand.

“How did you know I was at the cemetery?”

“Gambino found out that Blackwater owned some plots there.
Rubalia called and said that there was a mausoleum on one of the plots. I saw a
thin beam of light reaching into the sky. It went so high, to the moon and
beyond. I would recognize your soul anywhere, Blue. It led me straight to you.
Varg arrived and pointed me to the right mausoleum.”

I smile and say, “Hold my hand, Jack.”

Jack covers my hand, which is right next to Varg’s head. He
lightly caresses it with his thumb. I look at our hands joined and look over at
Varg’s snout lying on the bed and his happy eyes gleaming at me. I say, “You’re
a good boy, Varg.”

Then I look at Jack and say, “Thank you for saving me.”

I feel a good measure of Jack’s shame and guilt ease. Not
enough, but it is a start. I squeeze his fingers lightly and revel in the
comfort and closeness of both Jack and Varg. My eyes close as I drift back to
sleep.

Bluebell Kildare: June 10, 2022, Red Ages

I wake with the realization that there are people in my
room. In fact, I know exactly who’s in my room. The energy coming off Maud is a
little hyper and restless. She’s worried. Alexis is calm and collected. Her
energy is focused. Both have good, loving souls that for some reason I can
sense without even turning on my sixth sense. Varg’s soul glows warm and bright
from beneath my bed, shining of loyalty, bravery, and honor. I ponder at the
new depth of my gift, wondering what caused it.

My cheek is still squished against the mattress. The pain is
bearable now, so I decided to open my eyes. Maud and Alexis are sitting in
chairs across from me. I see a machine hooked up to an IV in my arm. Maud is
flipping through the pages of a
Cosmopolitan
magazine, and Alexis is
knitting a large, beautiful, pale blue something.

I smile at the fact that they seem to have their roles
reversed. Aren’t older people supposed to knit while younger people peruse
fashion magazines?

“What are you knitting?”

Both Maud’s and Alexis’ eyes jump to me. I see Alexis’ face
break into a smile and Maud’s turn into a frown. Alexis says, “A shawl for cool
evenings.”

“It is a beautiful stitch.”

Alexis smiles at that.

Maud, never one to be left behind, says, “You scared the
shit out of me, chicky! Making me chase all over town looking for Varg, worried
out of my mind for you. I may not look like it, but I’m an old lady. You just
can’t do that to me!”

“I’m so sorry, Maud. I didn’t mean to worry you.”

Maud’s face softens at that. “You should be sorry. I called
Father O’Brennen and we had the whole church praying for you.”

I wince internally, hoping I don’t owe some sort of cosmic
debt for that.

“Then I jumped over the backyard fence and nearly broke my
hip to tell Harry Pickets I needed his help to drive me around looking for
Varg. Thankfully Alexis joined us so I didn’t have to spend all day alone with
Harry.”

Alexis snickers at this and interjects, “I assure you, it
was more painful for me than for either of you.”

Then she leans in and says, “Harry was more than glad to be
her driver. I think he would paint her toenails pink and hand-feed her grapes
if he had a chance. But Maud plays him like a puppet.”

Maud glares at Alexis and then mutters something under her
breath. I hear the words cow, milk, and free mixed in. Then she says sharply,
“He asked me into his house while he got the keys. As if I would go in his
house! I hardly know the man.”

“You have been his neighbor for over twenty years!” Alexis
exclaims.

Maud snaps, “And exactly how well do you know your
neighbors, Alexis?”

I could laugh at that because I’m her only neighbor, but I
can see this is going nowhere good. I ask, “How long was I gone?”

“Two days,” Maud says gently.

“Oh. I thought it was much longer.”

Alexis says, “It was long enough. You were unconscious for
another five days and just briefly woke up yesterday.” Then she leans back and
gestures to the windowsill. “Father O’Brennen came and brought you flowers.”

I look over and see five small vases filled with different
types of flowers. I see lilies, daffodils, tulips, lilacs, and daisies. I look
at Alexis and Maud. “Why so many?”

Maud laughs. “He didn’t know what you would like, and
several parishioners donated, so he just picked a selection.”

Ohh! I hope that is not another cosmic debt. But they sure
are lovely. I ask my friends, “Can you get the nurse? I want to try to turn
over on my side.”

“Hey there!” says the nurse when she enters a moment later.
“Mr. Tanner told me you woke up once. I wasn’t sure I believed it. Well, lying
on your side is allowed, but you have a lot of damage on your back still. Are
you sure? It might hurt more.”

“I’d like to try it. Can you help me roll over?”

The nurse scoots me over to the side of the bed and places
some pillows next to me to keep me in place. As she does this, I notice that I
am still wearing the Belladonna Necklace. The nurse then rolls me backwards
toward the center, half on the pillows, and the chains gently clang. She puts a
pillow under my head so I am lying sideways with my head supported.

“That’s much better,” I say. “My muscles were cramped.”

Varg decides to join the party by placing his snout next to
my pillow again. I look at him and say, “Hey, buddy! You are such a good boy. I
missed you.”

Varg starts wagging his tail at my coos and hits the stand
holding my IV. The nurse glares at Varg, and he sits his haunches down
obediently.

The nurse plays with the machine that’s next to me. Then she
hands me a little plastic button and says, “This is morphine. It helps with the
pain. When you start to feel too much pain, press the button. It will knock you
out in no time.”

“Okay, thank you.” I hold on to the button. I’ve had enough
pain.

She hands me another button and says, “Press this button if
you need me. The doctor should arrive in a few minutes, so you should get your
visiting done now.” She nods meaningfully at Maud and Alexis and gives them the
“you had better skedaddle when he arrives, or else” look. Then she leaves.

I look at Alexis and Maud. “Why am I still wearing the
necklace Blackwater put on me?”

Alexis and Maud exchange looks, then Alexis speaks up. “No
one knows how to take it off. It’s secured with magic and seems unbreakable,
even for the Vampires. I guess you’re stuck with it awhile.”

I frown at this. The necklace is beautiful, and it doesn’t
seem to work on me, thankfully, but it isn’t the most comfortable thing in the
world. Maybe Jack knows someone who can get it off. Thinking of Jack reminds me
of a question I had earlier.

“Jack said he saw a light over the cemetery, and that’s how
he found me. Is that true? Did you see the light?”

Alexis shakes her head and says, “No, I can’t see auras or
souls. Not many people can. If Jack hadn’t been searching for you, you wouldn’t
have been found in time. You know, he wouldn’t even leave you at the hospital
until you woke. I brought bagged blood here every day for him. That man loves
you.” She nods for emphasis.

“I know,” I say sadly. “But he thinks he’s tarnished because
he is a Vampire. He won’t allow himself to be with me.”

“How ridiculous!” Maud exclaims. “Why are the world’s
greatest fools all men?”

“You can kick his butt for me.”

Maud says, “Humph! Someone needs to.”

We hear a knock at the door. Maud looks over and says, “It’s
the doctor, chicky. We’ll step outside now, but we will be right here until
Jack returns.”

Maud and Alexis both kiss me on the cheek and say goodbye.

The doctor is a short, wiry guy with thick glasses, a large
nose, and a mass of frizzy, dark hair. His energy is strong, and he feels happy
but tired. He introduces himself. “Hi, I’m Dr. Ziggler. How are you feeling,
Blue?”

I smile wryly. “Well, I’ve been better. But I’ve been
worse.”

Dr. Ziggler grins. “You sure have. I’m going to examine you
briefly. Then we’ll talk about your injuries.”

When he is done with his poking and prodding, he says,
“Well, you’re coming along fine—amazing, actually. Do you know how extensive
your injuries were?”

“Well, I know I almost died, or I did die and was brought
back. Jack gave me some of his blood. But I don’t know what damage has been
done. Unfortunately I can’t see my back.”

Dr. Ziggler nods. “Well, I am not sure if you died or were
on the verge of death, but by the time you got to us, I couldn’t believe you
were alive myself when I saw your back. It was bad, Blue. Really bad. Skin was
missing from large sections, and the muscle was lacerated down to bone in many
places, including in places over your spine. How your spinal cord survived, I
don’t know. We had to take some skin from your belly and do skin grafts and sew
you up as best as we could. But there is significant muscle damage, and you
still need more skin grafts. You also had tremendous blood loss. We did the
most immediately needed work, but then we needed to stabilize you too.”

I nod at this.

Dr. Ziggler goes on. “You’ll regain some of your muscle
strength back, but not all of it. You lost a lot of muscle in places. And there
will be scarring.”

I nod again.

“How are you handling this?”

“I’m okay.”

Dr. Ziggler eyes me closely. “I can see that you’re okay.
But how are you okay? No one else would be.”

“Did you hear what happened?”

Dr. Ziggler answered, “What I’ve been told is that you were
tortured with a whip over the course of days without food or water or warmth or
clothing. Your injuries were consistent with that.”

I say, ”The man who did that to me, he wanted something from
me, and if I gave it to him, he would have been able to cause great harm to a
great many people. I made a choice. I didn’t expect to ever leave that room. I
am here now, and he is dead, and he can’t hurt those people now. So I’m okay. I
am better than I ever expected.”

I see a sparkling of tears in Dr. Ziggler’s eyes. He nods
and pats my hand. “Well, I see then. I’ll let you rest now. We’ll talk more
tomorrow.”

When Dr. Ziggler leaves, I decide it’s high time I hit the
pain button.