Authors: Tawdra Kandle
“Glad to know I’m not the only one. It bothered me, though. More than it should have, coming from a virtual stranger. And then I ended up here, which was just bizarre. I don’t know. There’s something about him, and even though most of the time he acts like he can’t stand me, I know he feels it, too. This pull.”
“Maybe it’s just animal lust, pure and simple. Once you get it out of your system, the pull may go away.”
“I guess it’s possible.” The song ended, and I followed Alex back to our table to sit down. “But I think it’s more than that. I like Sam. When we were sitting on the porch talking last night, it felt like we were friends.”
Alex leaned back in his chair. “I think you should go for it. Rock his world a little. I haven’t seen him in years, but the Sam I knew could use a little shake, rattle and roll.”
Ali fell into her chair. “Who’s shaking and rolling?”
Alex patted her arm. “Your brother and Meghan.”
“Awesome! Someone should be. Okay, let’s dance more.”
I pulled out my phone. “Ali, do you think we should go home? It’s getting late.”
“After we dance. I’ve got eight years to make up for.”
She wasn’t kidding. It was another hour before we left the dance floor, thirty minutes more before I got her out the door and to the car, with Alex’s help.
“Are you sure you can get her home all right?” He closed the passenger door.
“Oh, yeah. I’m perfectly sober. And I’ve got my phone if we have any problem.”
“Okay.” He looked back toward the bar. “I’m going to go back inside for a little while. I saw some interesting prospects, and I’m going to pursue them, see what happens.” He nudged me with his elbow. “Might I suggest you go home and do the same?”
I grinned. “I just may do that. It was good to meet you, Alex.”
“You, too. I’m going to be in town for two weeks, so if you need anyone to talk to or to take you dancing ... you know where I am. One farm over.”
“Got it. Good night.”
The car was silent as I drove through town. I thought Ali had fallen asleep, so I jumped a little when she spoke.
“Isn’t Alex great? I’ve missed him.”
“Yeah.” I fumbled with a way to bring up a sensitive topic. “Ah, couldn’t have been easy to grow up gay in a small town in Georgia.”
Ali’s laugh was laced with sleepiness. “Yeah, but nobody bothered him. Not really. He was always just Alex. He’s so cool. He was there for me ... during a bad time.”
I frowned. “He was in your high school class, right? So didn’t you say he went away to college? Was he around when you were getting divorced?”
“No. No, that wasn’t a bad time, that was only a course correction. It was the best thing for Bridge and me, when Craig left.”
“Does Craig ever see Bridget? Where did he go, anyway?”
“He moved to Arkansas. No, he doesn’t see her. Hasn’t since she was a baby.” She was quiet for a few minutes, and then I heard the unmistakable sound of a single sob.
“I’m sorry.” I kept one hand on the wheel and my eyes on the road as I reached over to pat her arm. “I didn’t mean to bring up a sensitive subject.”
“No. You didn’t. I always get—” She hiccupped. “I get weepy when I drink.” She sighed, her breath shaky. “Craig doesn’t see Bridget because she’s not his daughter.”
“Ah. Oh.” I worked to keep my voice even.
“No one knows, except Craig and Alex.”
“And Sam?”
She shook her head. “No, Sam doesn’t know. I was afraid if I told him the truth, he wouldn’t let me marry Craig, and he’d go after—her real father. And that was the last thing I wanted.”
“Who is her real father? Is he still around?”
Ali bit her lip. “He was my boyfriend for a long time. But he left Burton the day after high school graduation, and he never came back. We had a fight, and that was the end. I didn’t know about Bridget. By the time I did, it was too late. I was dating Craig already, mostly because I was still so hurt, and when I told him ...” She shrugged. “He asked me to marry him. He thought it would be fun, I guess, to try to make a family. It didn’t work. But Alex was there for me in those days when I was trying to figure out what to do.”
We were both quiet until I turned off the road and onto the driveway that led to the farm. “I’m so sorry, Ali. That must have been incredibly hard.”
She turned to grip my wrist. “You can’t tell Sam, okay? Some day I will. But now, it would crush him to find out I didn’t tell him the truth back then.”
“I promise, I won’t say anything.” The headlights of the car swept over the house as we pulled to the back, and I thought I saw someone sitting on the front porch. Sam, watching to make sure we got home, I assumed. I parked the car, and Ali and I snuck into the back like kids after curfew.
“I’m going right upstairs to bed.” She stopped suddenly and pulled me into a tight hug. “Thank you, Meghan. I had so much fun tonight. You have no idea.” She released me and turned to climb the steps.
I waited until I heard the click of her bedroom door, and then I shut off the lights Sam had left on for us. Taking a deep breath, I headed for the front porch.
Time to shake, rattle and roll.
THE MUCHKIN WASN’T HARD to put to bed. One boring storybook later, she was sound asleep, snoring softly, with her mouth open. Whether it was the fact that she was worn out from art class and her chores today, or just that she knew I wasn’t going to take any nonsense, I didn’t have the same problems her mother did with bedtime. I went back downstairs and wandered. I should have been exhausted, too, but I couldn’t settle. I tried to sit down with a book I’d been reading for the last month, but every time I heard the slightest noise, my ears perked up, wondering if the girls were home.
Finally, just before midnight, I stalked outside to sit on the porch. The night was still, but every now and then, a breeze blew up to rustle the trees. Stretching out my legs, I dropped my head onto the back of the rocking chair and closed my eyes.
I wanted to think about baseball and the tomato plants bursting with robust red fruit and the next Guild meeting. But even though I kept forcing my mind in those directions, it seemed determined to wander back to this morning, and the undeniable softness of Meghan’s lips. The silk of her hair. The scent of her, fresh from sleep, sweet and warm. The heaviness in her eyes when she lifted them to look at me after I’d stepped back, as though I could lay her out on that rock and do whatever I wanted with her full approval.
I should’ve laughed it off and gone in to have breakfast with her. But instead I’d run away and been the first one at the farm stand, putting up with the girls who worked for us when they commented on my snappishness as I took out my frustration on them. All morning, whether I was on the tractor or on the ground, I thought of her. That told me one thing: this was a mistake. Touching her had been crazy.
I don’t know when I decided to go into town, but there I was, in the truck, heading to the school. I knew what time her classes ended, roughly, but there were still kids and moms trickling out of the building when I pulled into the parking lot. I watched, parked in the shade of a tree, until I figured the last of them was gone.
The school office was open, but although I heard voices from within, I couldn’t see the secretary or the principal. I strode down the hall, wondering which classroom was Meghan’s, when the sound of singing reached my ears. It wasn’t necessarily the best I’d ever heard, but I knew it was her; the song was one I’d heard her playing on her iPod around the house. I followed the sound around the corner and spotted the open door.
She was straightening up her desk, packing her bag, and I didn’t think she even realized she was singing. Her lips moved, but it was absent-minded, almost without thought. I took a minute to watch her unawares. She walked around the room with grace and purpose, smoothing back her hair from her eyes. She’d put it up in a ponytail today, and it looked cute, swinging in time with her steps. Her jeans hugged that tempting little ass, but her green shirt looked professional and grown-up. I guessed it was a compromise, with the jeans as her casual, artistic side, and the top her concession to being a teacher.
I knew it was a matter of time before she glanced over and I scared her out of her mind, so I raised my fist and knocked.
She jerked her head up, startled, and then her eyes went soft again and those lips curved into a smile. She circled the desk and came around front to lean against it, crossing her arms, which only served to put her boobs on display.
Shit
. I couldn’t think like that.
It was true that I’d expected her to argue with me when I told her the kiss had been a mistake. But instead, she only smiled and agreed. She wasn’t mad or upset, at least not so I could tell. She didn’t try to change my mind. And then the next thing I knew, she was practically pushing me out the door and into my truck.
It was annoying when she didn’t act like I thought she should. Or at least like I thought she would. I’d driven back to the farm in a worse state than I’d left it, dropped my pickup behind the barn and switched it for the farm truck, moving fast to avoid running into Ali and having to explain to her why I’d left in the middle of the day to drive all the way into town.
I knew Meghan would be home by the time I ran out of things that could be done away from the house, and I weighed the mixed anticipation and dread of seeing her against Ali’s temper if I missed dinner without a good excuse. Ali won. Besides, why the hell should I let this little redhead keep me from my own house and my own supper? I hadn’t done anything wrong. Or if I had, I’d fixed it by our conversation this afternoon. Now I needed to just get on with it, forget how she’d felt beneath my hands and my lips, bull through the next two months. I could do it.
When Ali brought up dancing, it was easy to say no. I never went to bars, not anymore. Not in years. The men I hung out with were a generation older than me, and we drank coffee instead of beer. Besides, there was no way I was taking Meghan dancing. I knew where that would end. I’d made up my mind that nothing would happen between us, but if I had to hold her close on the dance floor ... or worse, watch while someone else did ... there was no way I’d be able to keep from kissing her again. Better to just stay away from any situations that were fraught with temptation.
I was shocked when Ali announced that she was going out with Meghan instead. And by the time I’d thought of all the reasons she shouldn’t, they were gone, Meghan dressed in some tiny skirt that barely covered her ass, a shirt that made her tits shout, “
Grab me!
” and fuck-me heels my sister had loaned her. I was left with a sleepy kid, a sink full of dishes and a growing frustration. Sitting out here on the porch might have been cooling off my body, but it wasn’t cooling off the frustration I’d been fighting all day.
I heard the sound of a car on the gravel driveway, and Meghan’s headlights swept over the house. I was sitting in the corner of the porch, so I doubted they’d spotted me. Still, I stayed put, hoping they would both go to bed fast. Once I knew they were in their rooms, I could sneak into mine with no one the wiser. I didn’t need the two of them teasing me for waiting up like I was their father.
The kitchen door squeaked, and I heard the click of heels across the floor. After a minute, one set changed, moving farther away. Ali climbing the stairs, I decided. Good. The other pair of feet began moving, too, and the lights I’d left on went out. I waited for the sound of Meghan’s bedroom door opening and closing.
Instead, the screen door opened, and Meghan stepped out onto the porch. Her eyes sought me in the dark corner, and I realized she must have seen me from the car.
She didn’t say anything. Standing a few feet away from me, lit only by the pale moonlight, she was ethereal. Her hair spilled over her shoulders, not quite disguising the swell of her breasts under the clingy shirt. I let my eyes wander down her legs, from the edge of the denim to my sister’s red high heels. The frustration that had been coiled in my gut all day found an outlet in a sudden stiffness between my legs.
Meghan took one step forward. She toed off her shoes, setting them by the door. Her eyes never left me as she took one step and then another toward me.