The Land of Decoration (3 page)

May said: “Well, if it isn’t my little treasure!”

Elsie said: “Well, if it isn’t my little love!”

“Ah, she’s a lovely girl!” said May, hugging me.

“She’s a blessing, that’s what she is!” said Elsie, kissing my cheek.

May said: “Auntie Nel was just telling us about the time she and the priest had a dustup.”

“Grape?” Nel said. Her chin wobbled as she chewed, because she doesn’t have teeth. Her top lip was whiskery. Her bottom lip was spitty.

“No thanks, Auntie Nel,” I said. I was too worried to eat, and even if I hadn’t been I wouldn’t have fancied one, because Auntie Nel smells of wee.

Uncle Stan came up. Uncle Stan is the Presiding Overseer. He drinks milk because of his ulcer and he’s from “Beemeengoomb.” Apparently Beemeengoomb is an even bigger Den of Iniquity than our town. It’s where he got his stomach ulcer, though some people say he got it because of Auntie Margaret. Stan put his arm round Auntie Nel and said: “How’s my favorite Sister?”

Nel said: “That carpet looks like it could do with Hoovering.”

Uncle Stan stopped smiling. He looked at the carpet. He said: “Right.”

Stan went to find the Hoover and I went to find Father. He was in the book room, sorting out last month’s surplus magazines with Brian. There are small white flakes on the shoulders of Brian’s jacket and in his hair. “H-h-h-how are y-y-y-you, J-J-Judith?” Brian said.

“Fine thanks,” I said. But I wasn’t. The pain in my stomach was coming back. I’d stopped thinking about Neil for a minute, only to remember again.

Alf came up. His tongue was flicking in and out at the corners of his mouth like a lizard. He said to Father: “Report cards in?” Father nodded. Alf is what Father calls “Second in Command.” He’s not much taller than me but wears little boots with heels. He is almost bald, but his hair is combed over and sprayed in a lid. I saw it lift once in the wind when we were preaching, and he jumped into the car and said: “Run and buy me some hairspray, kid!” and wouldn’t get out until I had.

Uncle Stan appeared, lugging the Hoover. He looked gray. “The speaker’s not here,” he said. “I don’t feel like giving the talk if he doesn’t turn up.”

“He will,” said Father.

“I don’t know,” said Alf. He hoisted his trousers. “The last speaker we were supposed to have got lost.” Suddenly he saw me and stopped frowning. “Josie’s got something for you.”

I didn’t like the way he was grinning. “What is it?” I said.

Father said: “It’s polite to say, ‘Thank you,’ Judith.” He frowned at me as if he was disappointed, and I flushed and looked down.

But Alf said: “I couldn’t tell you what it is, could I? That would spoil the surprise.”

Josie is Alf’s wife. She is very short and very wide, has a long white ponytail and a mouth like a slit, where creamy saliva collects in the corners and stretches like a concertina when she talks. She wears funny clothes and likes to make them for other people. So far she has made me: a crocheted dress with blue and peach roses, which she asked about until it shrank in the wash, a turquoise skirt with ribbon around the edge, which reached to the ground, a crocheted Cinderella-doll toilet-roll holder, which Father refused to have in the bathroom so I made it into a hill for the Land of Decoration, a toilet-seat cover, which now keeps drafts out at the foot of the back door, bright blue leg warmers, an orange bodysuit, two cardigans, and a balaclava. Josie must think either that we are very poor, that I am much bigger than I am, or that I am very cold. One day I will tell her that she is wrong: that we aren’t rich but we have enough money to buy clothes, that though I may appear to be older because I read the Bible well and talk to the grown-ups I am ten, and four foot four, and that most of the time I am just the right temperature.

I scanned the crowd but couldn’t see any sign of her. To be on the safe side, I went to stand behind the sound equipment with Gordon. There isn’t anyone my age in our congregation, so although Gordon is a lot older than me, I chat to him. Gordon was testing the microphones, making a
pock-pock
sound.

I looked at the clock. There were now exactly twenty-three hours until Neil Lewis put my head down the toilet. There was nothing for it. Gordon was setting up the microphones. I said to him: “Have you got a mint?” Gordon rummaged in his pocket. He unrolled the top of a packet and dropped a dusty white tablet into my hand. “Thanks,” I said. I only ask for Gordon’s mints in emergencies. Gordon took two and went back to untangling cables.

Gordon has not long come off heroin; he got hooked on heroin because he Got In with the Wrong Crowd. He Battles Depression, so he does very well coming to meetings. It was really serious for a While. It looked like Gordon might have to be Removed. He was marked as a bad influence. They say that God shone His light into Gordon’s heart, but I think his recovery is to do with the extra-strong mints. Father said heroin makes people happy because it takes away pain; the mints make you happy because when you have finished eating one you realize you’re not in pain anymore. It comes down to the same thing. The trouble is, Gordon is getting used to them. He can already knock back four in a row. I don’t know what he will do when he manages to get through a whole packet, because they don’t make them any stronger.

There were a lot of people in the hall now, or a lot for our congregation anyway—nearly thirty, I would say. There were even some faces we don’t usually see. Pauline, the woman who had the poltergeist Uncle Stan exorcised last spring, and Sheila from the women’s refuge. Geena from the mental home, with scars on her arms, and Wild Charlie Powell, who lives up the Tump in a wooden house among the fir trees. It felt as if something special was going to happen but I couldn’t think what.

On the platform, Alf tapped the microphone. “Brothers and Sisters,” he said, “if you’d like to take your seats, the meeting’s about to start.”

So the speaker hadn’t made it. I imagined his car tumbling down the mountain, his cries getting fainter and fainter till the battered hunk of metal disappeared into the mist. “See you later,” I said to Gordon, and went to my seat.

Father and I sit right at the front, so our knees are almost touching the platform. My neck gets a crick looking up. Father says it is better than being Distracted. Distraction leads to Destruction. But the front row has distractions of its own. The smell of Auntie Nel being one of them. I was glad of my extra-strong mint.

We stood to sing “The Joys of Kingdom Service.” Father sang loudly, bringing the sound deep from within his chest, but I couldn’t sing, partly because thinking about Neil and partly because the extra-strong mint had vacuumed all the spit out of my mouth. Father nudged me and frowned, so I stuck the mint into my cheek and shouted as loudly as he did.

We had to do the magazine study first because there was no speaker. It was called “Illuminators of the World” and was all about how we weren’t to hide our light under a bushel, which turned out to be a kind of basket. Alf said the best way we could do this was to fill in a report card. Father answered up and said what a privilege it was to be God’s mouthpieces. Elsie answered and said we met skeptics, but if we didn’t tell people how would they know? Brian said: “Th-th-th-th-th-the thing. Th-th-th-th-thing is—” But we never found out what the thing was. Auntie Nel waved her hand about but it turned out she was only telling May she had wet herself.

By that time my mint had gone, so I put my hand up and said how happy God must be to see all the little lights shining in the darkness, and Alf said: “Well, we can all see your light is shining, Sister McPherson!” But it wasn’t, and I didn’t feel happy, and just then I wished I wasn’t one of God’s lights, because if I wasn’t, Neil Lewis wouldn’t put my head down the toilet.

When the magazine study was over, Father got onto the platform and said: “Now, Brothers, due to unforeseen circumstances…” I could see Uncle Stan collecting his papers and wiping his neck with his hanky. Then a rush of air swept into the hall and we heard the outer door close.

I turned round. A man was coming through the foyer doors. They seemed to have blown open, because they held themselves wide as he passed through, then closed behind him. The man had caramel skin and hair the color of blackbirds. He looked like one of the Men of Old, except that he wasn’t wearing a robe but a suit of dark blue and, where the light shone, it glistened like petrol in a puddle. The man came right up to our row and sat at the end, and I smelled something like fruit cake and something like wine.

Alf hurried up to him. He whispered to the man, then nodded at Father. Father smiled. He said: “And we are very glad to welcome…”

“Brother Michaels,” said the man. His voice was the strangest thing of all. It was like dark chocolate.

Father said: “Our visiting speaker, from…?” But Brother Michaels didn’t appear to have heard. Father asked again and Brother Michaels only smiled. “Well, anyway Brother, we’re very glad to have you,” Father said, then got down.

There was a lot of clapping, then Brother Michaels got onto the platform. He didn’t seem to have notes. He took something out of his briefcase and put it on the rostrum. Then he looked up. Now that he was looking at us, I could see just how dark his skin was. His hair was dark too, but his eyes were strange and pale. Then he said: “What beautiful mountains you have here, Brothers!”

I could feel how surprised everyone was. No one ever said anything about our valley being beautiful. Brother Michaels said: “Don’t you think so? I was coming over them today in my car and thinking how lucky you are to live here. Why, from the top I thought I could see right into the clouds.”

I looked out the window. Brother Michaels must either be crazy or need glasses; the clouds were even lower now—you couldn’t see more than three feet in front of you.

He smiled. “The theme of our talk today is ‘Moving Mountains.’ What do you think you would need, Brothers, to move that one over there?”

“Dynamite,” said Alf.

“You couldn’t,” said Uncle Stan.

“A pretty big digger,” said Gordon, and everyone laughed.

Brother Michaels held something up between his finger and thumb. “Do you know what this is?”

“It isn’t anything,” I whispered, but Father smiled.

“Which of you believes I’m holding anything at all?” said Brother Michaels.

Some people put up their hands; lots didn’t. Father was still smiling and he put up his hand, so I did too. Brother Michaels held a piece of paper out just below the microphone. Then he opened his finger and thumb and we heard something fall. “Those of you who guessed I was holding something, give yourself a pat on the back,” he said. “You were seeing with Eyes of Faith.”

“What is it?” I said, but Father only put his finger to his lips.

“That, Brothers, is a mustard seed,” said Brother Michaels. He held up a picture of a mustard seed blown up. It was like a tiny yellow ball. “It’s the smallest of seeds but grows into a tree that the birds of heaven sit in.” Then he began to talk about the world.

He said that many difficulties would befall God’s people before the system ended. He said the Devil was roaming the earth, seeking to devour someone. We read about how the Israelites stopped believing they would get to the Land of Decoration, how they scorned God’s miracles and the miracle workers. “Never let us be like that,” he said. “Faith is not a possession of all people. The world laughs at faith. They wouldn’t think of telling that mountain to move. But turn with me in your Bibles, Brothers, and see what Jesus says.”

Then he began to read, and as he did my heart beat hard and it was as if I was catching light.

“
For I say to you truthfully, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to a mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move and nothing will be impossible for you.
”

“Of course,” he said, “Jesus was speaking metaphorically. We can’t really move mountains. But we can do things we think are impossible if we have faith. Faith sees the mountain as already moved, Brothers. It isn’t enough to think what the new world will be like, we have to see ourselves there; all the while we’re thinking what it will be like, we’re still here. But faith has wings. It can carry us wherever we need to go.”

Then he began to talk, and it was like listening to a great story unraveling, and I knew the story but didn’t remember having heard it before, or not told this way.

In the beginning, Brother Michaels said, all of life was miraculous. Humans lived forever and never got sick. Every fruit, every animal, every part of the earth, was a perfect reflection of God’s glory, and the relation between the humans was also perfect. But Adam and Eve lost something. They lost faith in God. So they began to die, the cells in their bodies began to deteriorate, and they were expelled from the garden.

“After that there were only glimpses of how things used to be: a sunset, a hurricane, a bush struck by lightning. And faith became something you prayed for in a room at midnight or on a battlefield or in a whale’s stomach or in a fiery furnace. Faith became a leap, because there was a gap between how things were and how they used to be. It was the space where miracles happened.

“Everything is possible, at all times and in all places and for all sorts of people. If you think it’s not, it’s only because you can’t see how close you are, how you only need to do a small thing and everything will come to you; miracles don’t have to be big things, and they can happen in the unlikeliest places. Miracles work best with ordinary things. Paul says: ‘Faith is the assured expectation of things long hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities though not beheld,’ and if we have just a little, other things will follow, Brothers. Sometimes more than we dreamed.”

The talk was finished, but for a second there was no clapping; then there was a storm of it. I felt I had woken up. But I had been sleeping longer than the talk; I felt I had been sleeping all my life.

I couldn’t wait for the song and prayer to be over. I thought Brother Michaels would be just the person to talk to about Neil Lewis.

*   *   *