The Lady Who Lived Again (23 page)

His certainty chilled her, and she sobered from her hopeful stupor. The faces of her tormentors—Matthew, Pastor Hogle and all the others—blurred into the dear countenance of her lover. She lowered her eyes, sinking beneath a wave of disappointment.

With a stroke to her hair, he tossed her a lifeline.

“Except, perhaps, my body’s insatiable need to have you.”

And once again, just like that, Jace’s singular magic buoyed her back to the surface.

Maddie hummed as she twirled about the room, packing her bags. The bridal party wasn’t due at the Crooked Lake House until later tomorrow, but since she’d awoken this morning full of excitement about having yet another night with Jace, she’d decided to put her energy to good use.

She felt so alive, so utterly renewed.

This fact both elated and depressed her. She tossed the dress she held to the bed, then slumped down next to it.

She loved him.

The words chimed in her head, and she jumped to her feet to quiet them. Pacing the room, she tried to dispel the panic that coursed through her veins. She simply could not love Jace. It was unrealistic, and Maddie, of all people, knew her limits. She hugged her arms to her chest as she sought another explanation.

Jace had been kind to her, compassionate, protective. When added to the bliss she’d experienced in his arms these past weeks, it was no wonder she was imagining her feelings for him were something more than what they were. It made perfect sense. She and Jace were merely friends. Close friends. Very close friends…

She blinked hard, willing herself to be convinced. A complication such as this had no place in her plans. She knew full well that after the wedding, her time with Jace would be over.

Of course, that didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy what time they had left.

Jace had made arrangements to stay at the hotel as well, and they would take full advantage of the opportunity this would provide. Amelia and her guests would be so engaged in the pre-wedding festivities, they’d never notice if Maddie and Jace slipped away.

Her spirit lifted as she decided to focus on that. With renewed vigor, she returned to the task of packing her bags. But she was soon interrupted by a knock on the door.

“You have a guest, Maddie.”

“Who is it, Rhetta?” she called through the door.

“Dolly Hogle,” Rhetta said. “She’s waiting in the parlor.”

Dolly Hogle? Had something happened to Daniel? What else could possibly bring Dolly here? Maddie’s pulse quickened as she followed Rhetta downstairs.

“Good morning, Dolly,” Maddie said.

Dolly glanced up from her seat with a timid half-smile. “I hope you don’t mind my stopping by uninvited.”

The lack of urgency in Dolly’s voice eased Maddie’s anxiety. “Not at all.” She took a seat across from the girl. “Rhetta will bring us some tea.”

Dolly nodded, looking a tad more comfortable.

“How is Daniel feeling?” Maddie asked.

“Very well.” Dolly lifted her chin. “Doctor Merrick said it was your quick thinking that helped him recover so thoroughly.” She lowered her eyes, fiddling with the folds of her skirts. “Of course, Uncle refuses to believe that.” She glanced up for Maddie’s reaction. “He prefers to believe you were trying to do something sinister to my cousin.”

Maddie gasped at the girl’s unexpected candor.

“Were you?”

“You’re a bright girl, Dolly. What do you think?”

Dolly shrugged. “I think it’s preposterous,” she said. “Though I wouldn’t blame you for wanting to hurt him after the way he so callously broke off your engagement.” She sighed. “That’s my opinion, anyway. Not that anyone cares to hear it.” She lifted her chin. “In my household I’m expected to keep my thoughts to myself.” Anger pierced through each word the unhappy girl spoke.

“I imagine it’s difficult to have so strict a guardian,” Maddie said, thinking of poor Elizabeth.

“Especially when you’re so ugly no one else will look at you.”

Dolly’s words left Maddie speechless. As did the grain of truth in them. Before the accident, Maddie, herself, had sought to avoid eye contact with the marked girl. She had treated Dolly the way she was now treated by others.

For whatever reason, when she first saw Dolly again at Amelia’s dress fitting, Maddie had no longer been distressed by Dolly’s appearance. She wondered why this might be.

“You’re one of the few people who will look me in the eye,” said Dolly.

“People tend to fear those who are different,” Maddie replied sadly.

“I’ve learned to accept my looks and how people react to my birthmark. You only have one life, and I’m going to make the best of mine.”

“That’s truly commendable, Dolly.”

“What I’m not prepared to do is marry Matthew Webster.”

Maddie couldn’t blame Dolly, but she wondered why the girl was confiding in her of all people. “Amelia told me of the arrangement,” Maddie began cautiously.

“Uncle has had it planned all along.” She shook her head. “Gert says I’m fortunate that Matthew has agreed. That he’s my only option, since no other man would want me.”

“Gertrude is a fool.”

A slow smile formed on Dolly’s lips. “She certainly is. And I’m her long-suffering sister.”

The girl spoke her mind. Who would have thought Dolly’s mousy facade veiled a witty and straightforward young woman?

Rhetta set up the tea. Maddie poured, listening as Dolly continued.

“Gert’s nonsense aside, I’ve no wish to marry a man I can’t stand. Matthew Webster is the worst sort of person. He takes great pleasure in controlling others, me in particular. He believes his natural skill for intimidation makes him well suited to lead a church. While that may be true, he won’t be piloting any congregation I’d want to join. He’s so self-righteous. Always watching and judging everyone with those disapproving eyes of his.”

Maddie couldn’t disagree. The way Matthew looked at her made her skin crawl.

“He’s worse than Uncle, I swear it.” Dolly shook her head. “And Uncle has promised to tutor him to be a man of the church once we are married.”

“I see.”

“I’d accepted this fate, but now I have hope there’s a man out there somewhere who could love me.” She stared into the rising steam from her cup. “You gave me that hope.”

“Me?”

Dolly glanced up. “If a man like Doctor Merrick could love you, surely there’s hope for me, too.”

Despite the initial sting of the unintended insult, Maddie admired the honesty. The words held more desperation than malice, but the hope the girl harbored was based on a lie. “You are certainly right, and I wish exactly that happiness for you,” Maddie said, feeling guilty. “But for now, you must tell me why you are here.”

Dolly sighed. “My uncle hates you intensely, Madeline.”

Although this was old news to Maddie, the force of hearing it aloud hit Maddie hard. She took a breath to regain her composure.

“I’m sorry to speak so plainly, but you must understand. Uncle’s rantings about you have poisoned many members of the congregation into believing you’re the bane of this town’s existence. That there’s something…abnormal…about you. He condemns you at every turn. Matthew, especially, has been greatly influenced by Uncle’s views. So much so, he’s insisting that Uncle take more aggressive action against you.” She inched to the edge of her chair. “I overheard Matthew and Uncle arguing last night over Matthew’s scheme to split from the church to form his own sect.” She tilted her head. “Although an estrangement between Matthew and my uncle would be an answer to my prayers, it would be at your expense. Matthew wishes to run you out of town…or worse.”

Surely Dolly was exaggerating. A man hoping for a life in the church—even a desperate one—would not be so foolish as to resort to violence. Still, Maddie was happy to have an ally in the Hogle family. It might make things easier at the wedding, at least.

“I appreciate the warning, Dolly. But there’s nothing I can do to change people’s opinion of me.” She smiled a sad smile. “Of course, I continue to try.”

“That handsome doctor of yours is sure trying.”

“Oh?”

“When he came to check on Daniel after the picnic, he gave it to them with both barrels.” A smile peeked out from the curtain of hair shielding her face. “I must admit, I rather enjoyed it.”

“What exactly were they saying?”

“Just as I told you. That you were trying to do something sinister to Daniel.”

“Ridiculous,” Maddie squeaked.

“That’s what Doctor Merrick told them. And that’s why I wanted to come see you today. Uncle was furious after Doctor Merrick left. Oh, how he carried on.” She sipped her tea. “Gertrude forbids me from speaking to you in public, so I’m telling you now. I do not share their opinions.” Dolly set down the cup. “If a man as smart and handsome as Doctor Merrick intends to marry you, I surmised you couldn’t be as bad as they say.”

Maddie blinked, and Dolly gasped at the words that had just snuck out of her mouth.

“I only meant—” the girl stammered.

“It’s all right, Dolly,” Maddie assured her. And strangely, it was. Maddie liked this girl. Dolly spent her days following in Gertrude’s shadow, and that couldn’t be easy. By seeking out Maddie’s company at the Sutter estate, she’d made a giant step in her own direction. The girl had admirable courage, but she was walking a fine line with her family. “I’m so glad you came,” Maddie said with genuine warmth. “You mustn’t tell them you were here, though.”

Dolly lowered her eyes. “They probably don’t even notice my absence. With the exception of Matthew, no one does.”

“I know a bit about being invisible.” Maddie nodded. “In fact, I expect the wedding weekend to amount to one long continuous snub.”

“I can’t say I’m looking forward to it, either,” Dolly blurted, looking instantly sheepish at her admission. “I’ve never been at ease in large crowds, you know.”

Maddie offered her a plate of cookies. “I used to love attending big affairs,” she said, thinking back on happier times. “In fact, I lived for them. The dancing, the excitement, the attention.” Maddie sighed. “Of course, that was a long time ago.”

“I’d trade places with you in a minute.”

Maddie winced. “And why on earth would you want to do that?”

“Despite everything, you’re still beautiful.”

Oh, Dolly
, Maddie thought as her mind drifted to her days as one of the Fair Five. Back then all that mattered were the latest fashions and hairstyles, flitting to parties and receiving attention. Vain and trivial ambitions that now seemed so empty. She and the Fair Five would never have welcomed a girl with Dolly’s imperfection into their circle. Yet everyone in Misty Lake had loved Maddie then. They couldn’t get enough of delightful Miss Madeline Sutter. The fact shamed her now. The accident had rendered her a pariah, and yet as strange as it seemed, she was a better person for it.

“Physical appearance is not everything, Dolly. More than anything, I want to be judged for who I am inside.”

Dolly nibbled testily on a ginger snap. “Oh, I know vanity is a sin, but I can’t help wishing I had something to be vain about,” she huffed. “Especially if it meant I could land a man as dreamy as Doctor Merrick.”

Maddie shifted in her seat. If only the girl knew the truth of how Maddie had “landed” Jace.

“Uncle says my mark is my mother’s punishment.”

“Punishment? For what?”

Dolly shrugged. “For some immorality she committed before I was born but now refuses to name.”

Maddie frowned.

“Mother insists her only transgression was eating too many strawberries while carrying me. The result of which I carry here.” She tapped her stained cheek.

“You don’t believe any of that, do you?”

Dolly shook her head, and Maddie was glad the girl was too bright to credit such silly superstitions.

“I can’t,” Dolly said. “If I blamed my mother, I’d be incapable of loving her as I do.” She shook her head. “I couldn’t live like that.”

Maddie nodded in understanding.

“I suspect Uncle blames you for Elizabeth’s death for a similar reason.”

“What do you mean?”

“He can’t blame God, Madeline. It’s easier to blame you.”

Maddie considered this, suspecting Dolly might be right. She was wise for her years and much tougher than she seemed. “Dolly, have you ever attempted to treat the mark?”

“Heavens no,” she said. “My family would never allow it.”

Jace’s warning echoed in Maddie’s head. She knew she was playing with fire by interfering, but she felt compelled to help this remarkable young woman.

“I’m not suggesting you act against your family’s wishes, but I have a recipe for a poultice that may help fade the mark. I applied it to the scars on my leg after the accident.”

Dolly straightened in her seat. “Did it help?”

“Most effectively.” Maddie tilted her head. “Would you like to try it?”

Dolly eyed her warily. “What’s in it?”

“A simple mixture of snake venom and rat tails. Maybe some eye of newt thrown in for good measure”

Dolly gaped.

Maddie burst out laughing. Dolly giggled too. It was the first time Maddie had heard Dolly laugh at anything, and the wonderful sound did Maddie’s heart good. Suddenly she had no doubts about helping her.

“Come with me to the kitchen.” Maddie led Dolly from the room. She grabbed a small bowl from the cupboard and placed in on the table, working in her mind how she’d go about healing the mark without the girl suspecting anything out of the ordinary.

Maddie went to the pantry and returned with a jar of horseradish. She poured half the contents of the jar into the bowl, then added some sour milk. Dolly hovered closer. “It smells horrible.”

“Fortunately, you don’t have to eat it,” she said, eyebrows waggling as she mixed. “I can help apply it if you’d like. I can’t be certain it will help, but what harm could it do?”

“No harm,” Dolly beamed. “No harm at all.” Her eyes brimmed with excitement. Hope.

Maddie tilted her head. “Dolly, this is a simple poultice of horseradish and sour milk. The mixture has helped fade freckles. Even scars. We can apply it, but you mustn’t let the results—whatever they are—dim your spirits. There is more to beauty than what is on the surface.”