The Inspired Leader: 101 Biblical Reflections for Becoming a Person of Influence (31 page)

THE GILDED AGE occurred in America between the end of the Civil War and the beginning of World War I. It featured spectacular fortunes being made by what became known derogatorily as the “Robber Barons.” Men such as Vanderbilt, Rockefeller, Morgan, and Gould reached unprecedented heights. Two men, Andrew Carnegie and Henry C. Frick, met in 1881 during Frick’s honeymoon. Frick owned H. C. Frick & Company, which transformed coal into coke, which was necessary for steel production. Carnegie, with one of America’s largest steel producing companies, needed a steady supply of coke for his factories. Together they formed a partnership that made both men fabulously wealthy. Each man stood at five feet two inches tall, but both were tough as nails and had egos that far exceeded their physical stature. Frick became chairman of Carnegie Steel Co. but the meddlesome Carnegie could not help but interfere in Frick’s work. They eventually suffered a major falling out in which Carnegie forced Frick from the company after they had filed lawsuits against each other. Frick built a large mansion on Fifth Ave and 70
th
Street to dwarf Carnegie’s. The two estranged friends, though they moved in the same circles and lived on the same street, never reconciled. Years later Carnegie sent word to Frick that he wanted to meet with him. Frick responded by saying, “Tell Mr. Carnegie I’ll see him in hell, where we both are going.” While both men became enormously wealthy and successful, their friendship was permanently fractured.

Perhaps nothing damages relationships more than pride. Pride causes us to focus on ourselves. It makes us see things from our own, limited, perspective. And perhaps, most importantly, pride prevents us from humbling ourselves, confessing our wrongdoing, and saying we’re sorry. Countless relationships have been permanently severed because pride refused to allow the aggrieved persons to be reconciled.

Some of the most troubling words Jesus ever spoke, were, “
Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you”
(Matthew 5:44). Jesus also claimed that the manner in which we treated those who harmed us would be the exact measure by which God would treat us for our sins against Him (Matthew 18:35). Scripture declares that not only are we to forgive others, but as God’s children, we are to be ministers of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 5:18). We ought to leave a trail of reconciliation behind us wherever we go and not a series of former friends.

At the close of the Civil War, there was widespread popular opinion in the Northern states that Robert E. Lee ought to be hung for his role in the deaths of thousands of Union soldiers. General Grant threatened to immediately resign in protest if Lee, who had surrendered honorably, was harmed. Grant and Lee had fought fiercely against one another. Yet Grant set their differences aside.

Christ went to incredible lengths to achieve reconciliation between God and us. He owed us nothing. It cost Him everything. And now, that same Christ is seeking to live out His life in us. He continues to have a heart for reconciliation. He is unwilling that we have any severed relationships in our lives. He knows how to restore broken relationships. His power is ultimately sufficient to overcome any obstacle. Do you have a relationship that Christ wants to mend?

REFLECT FOR A MOMENT

1. Do you currently have any broken relationships? If you do, who are they? How do you think Christ feels about them? What do you think He wants you to do about them? When will you do that?
   

2. Christ has given you a ministry of reconciliation. Are you someone who causes strife between others, or are you a person who mends fences and reconciles estranged people? Ask the Lord to give you the wisdom to be a reconciler.
   

3. Have your actions offended someone? Is anyone presently upset with you? Take a moment right now to jot down some specific things you might do to be reconciled. Put dates beside them indicating when you plan on taking those important actions.
   

IN 1948, BILLY GRAHAM was still fashioning his internationally renowned ministry. During a two-week series of meetings in Modesto, California, Billy gathered his team together. Men such as Grady Wilson, George Beverly Shea, and Cliff Barrows had been drawn together with Billy to form what would become the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. Simultaneously, they were becoming good friends. Billy was concerned about the number of evangelists who were crossing moral and ethical lines and bringing disgrace to Christ’s name. That day, the group of associates drew up what they would later refer to as the Modesto Manifesto, in which they committed themselves to certain principles that would protect them from committing the same ethical and moral mistakes others were making. They pledged to stay above reproach concerning money. They identified ways they could protect themselves from sexual sin. They committed themselves to working with local churches, rather than criticizing them. Finally, they pledged themselves to be absolutely honest in all of their publicity. As a result, though no Christian ministry received greater exposure or opportunities than they would, each man remained true to his commitment and the group of colleagues remained friends through over six decades of collaboration.

When Billy Graham was 78, he reflected on the team of friends he had worked with for six decades. He called Grady Wilson his “God-given balance wheel,” because he helped add humor and laughter to the team. Of Cliff Barrows, Graham described his “humility and willingness to be a servant” as well as his spirit of reconciliation, that helped the team to work peaceably together. Of George Beverly Shea, Graham observed, “I don’t believe I’ve ever heard him utter an unkind or critical word about anyone” (Billy Graham,
Just As I Am,
781-786). Good friends, and trusted colleagues, this extraordinary group set an example of godly teamwork.

Scripture advises: “
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up”
(Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). The marketplace is filled with pressures, temptations, and disappointments. It is foolish to assume that you can face them without godly friends to walk alongside you. Some people believe it is unwise to develop friendships at work. Yet while one must always relate to others with integrity, we spend too many hours each week at our jobs to not have friends among our colleagues.

The writer of Proverbs warns that: “
A man who isolates himself seeks his own desire; he rages against all wise judgment
” (Proverbs 18:1). A sign that someone is in danger of moral or ethical failure is that they isolate themselves from others. People who shun accountability are playing with fire.

Friends come in various personality types, temperaments, and senses of humor. If variety is the spice of life, having a diversity of friends adds much to the quality of your existence. Proverbs advises, “
A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother”
(Proverbs 18:24). For you to enjoy godly friends yourself, you must be willing to love people as if they were your own brother or sister. As the Lord places friends alongside your life, they will strengthen, protect, and cheer you on so you accomplish far more than you ever would have, had you lived your life in isolation.

REFLECT FOR A MOMENT

1. List the friends who are closest to you. Take a moment to evaluate them. What do you think of their number? Their variety? Their proximity? The length of your friendships?
   

2. Are you someone that others seek out to be their friend? What kind of friend are you? Rate yourself as a friend on a scale of 1-10. What might you do to become a better friend to others?
   

3. Do you have a tendency to be a private person? Do you have difficulty sharing your life with others? Do you prefer to be alone? It is dangerous for anyone to live their life in isolation. If you sense you need more friends in your life, especially at work, ask the Lord to show you how to be a better friend to people than you have been previously.