The Hitwoman and the Neurotic Witness (14 page)

It rang just once before going to his voicemail. “It’s me. Leave a message.”

“Gypsy remembered,” I said breathlessly. “She remembered. Call me back.” Disconnecting the call, I assured her. “He’ll know what to do.”

“We have to stop them,” Gypsy said again. This time her tone was strong and determined. She stalked back toward the car purposefully.

I stayed where I was. “What should I do?” I asked God.

“Assuming she’s not spouting more nonsense,” he said slowly. “You can either turn a blind eye to the situation or help her.”

“I don’t need more trouble in my life,” I protested weakly.

“Nobody is going to hold a gun to your head and force you to help,” the lizard said quietly.

“Come on,” Gypsy shouted from beside the car, waving me to follow her.

Grudgingly I started to move in her direction.

“I’m just getting everything back on track,” I muttered.

“So don’t help her,” God said.

“You’re not helping.”

“You’re a grown woman. Do you really need my help to make this decision?”

I shook my head. Then, realizing he couldn’t see me from his vantage point in my bra, I said, “It’s a no-brainer.” I picked up my pace, hurrying toward the car.

“There isn’t much time,” Gypsy said when I was within earshot. “It’s happening now.”

“Now?” I sort of squeaked, the instant pressure getting to me. I’d wanted to have a plan. I’d wanted to think this out. I’d wanted back-up. At the very least, I wanted a gun, but now I was being told, once again, that time was of the essence.

“No time like the present,” God quipped from my chest.

I considered yanking him out and leaving him there on the side of the road. Instead, I nodded my understanding to Gypsy and hopped into the driver’s seat.

“Everything okay?” Armani asked.

“I’m dropping you and Leslie at the Ten Pins.”

“Oooh,” Leslie clapped her hands in delight. “I love bowling.”

Armani waved her mangled hand in my field of vision as I pulled the car onto the road. “I can’t bowl.”

“Have you ever tried?”

“Well, no, but….” She trailed off.

“Ask them to give you a kid’s ball,” I suggested.

“But I don’t want to bowl,” she whined.

“Oh, let out your inner Chiquita,” I snapped. “Maybe you’ll meet an interesting man while you’re there.”

“Loretta met one of her husbands there,” Leslie interjected. “What was his name? Something that started with a vowel. Was it an A name?”

“Oooh,” God mocked. “We’ve got our own game of Wheel of Fortune going. Can I pick another vowel?”

Armani’s whining, Leslie’s prattling, and God’s sarcasm made it difficult to concentrate on the important things: namely driving and figuring out how to stop the human traffickers.

“His name was Eugene,” I announced. “Now everyone shut up and let me drive.”

The occupants of the car fell blessedly silent…except for Armani.

“
Why
are you taking us to Ten Pins?” my semi-psychic friend asked.

“I have to run an errand with Gypsy,” I replied smoothly.

“So you’re just going to dump us in the world of smelly shoes and polyester shirts?”

“It’s a time-sensitive errand,” I said.

“There’s time to take them back to the Bed-and-Breakfast,” Gypsy said quietly.

“But I wanted to bowl,” Leslie pouted.

I did my level best to squeeze the life out of the steering wheel as I drove the rest of the way to the B&B. When we got there I said to Gypsy, “Maybe we should talk to the Griswalds.”

She nodded. “That’s a good idea.” Jumping out of the car, she hurried inside.

Leslie and Armani took their sweet time getting out.

“Thanks for picking me up.” Leslie wandered toward the house.

“That was officially one of the weirdest nights I’ve had,” Armani groused.

“Sorry,” I muttered.

“I’ll see you at work tomorrow?” she asked.

I nodded, thinking,
if I don’t get myself killed tonight
. “Thanks for your help with Leslie.”

Leaning against the car, she bent down to say, “My prediction for you came true too.”

“How’s that?”

“You drew my ire.”

Chuckling, I waved her away. She limped off toward her car.

Gypsy came flying back out. “They’re not there.”

“Are you sure?”

“The only ones there are a pair of elderly lovers who are doing indescribable things with whipped cream.” She shuddered with revulsion.

“I’m so sorry,” I gasped, wondering if seeing Loretta and Templeton re-traumatized her. “Let me call Zeke again.”

“We’ve got to get to a warehouse,” she said climbing back into the car. “That’s where the girls are being held. It’s at 90 Oak Street.”

“I don’t know where that is,” I said, as my cell phone reached out to Zeke’s. It went straight to his voicemail. I disconnected the call. “Maybe we should call the police.”

Gypsy looked at me like I was the crazy one. “Don’t you read your own newspaper? The police here are all corrupt.”

“Not all of them,” I protested. “Besides, I don’t have a map and I don’t know where this Oak Street is.”

“But you do have your phone, Luddite,” God boomed.

Startled by his squeak, Gypsy jumped in her seat.

“Huh?” I said eloquently.

“Your phone has maps and a GPS system and all kinds of modern wonders,” the lizard informed me in his haughtiest of tones.

I wanted to tell him where he could stick the modern wonders, but I thought that would inflict mental suffering on the poor medium. I handed Gypsy my phone, saying, “Maybe you could find it on here?”

Nodding, she tapped away like a crazed woodpecker on the screen. “Yes. Yes, of course. Why didn’t I think of that?”

“Because you’re as deficient as Maggie,” God groused.

I clapped my hand against my chest to shut him up.

“Sensitive skin!” He yelled, but took the hint and didn’t offer any more commentary.

“Got it,” Gypsy said. “Make a right at the corner.”

Putting the car into drive, I followed her directions while trying to figure out how to convince her that our only hope of saving those girls was to call Patrick. Of course that assumed that the girls really did exist and that he’d believe the ravings of my patchouli-scented passenger.

“What’s a Luddite?” I asked.

Gypsy shrugged.

“Someone opposed to technology,” God piped up.

“I’m not
opposed
to it,” I said. “I just don’t know how to use it well.”

“Opposed to what?” Gypsy asked.

“Never mind,” I muttered. “Just tell me where to turn next.”

Fifteen minutes later, having entered the industrial area of town, Gypsy said, “I think we should park here.”

“But this is Pine Street,” I told her, not liking the look of the dark, abandoned street.

“Oak is one block over. We can’t just drive up to the warehouse. We have to sneak up.”

Coasting to a stop, I grudgingly put the car into park. “I don’t know about this.”

Instead of replying, she leapt out of the car and rushed down the street. Since she still had my phone I couldn’t call Zeke who’d gotten me into this mess, Patrick who’d no doubt tell me I had no self-control, or the police, who are apparently corrupt.
Drew ire
indeed.

“Worst. Plan. Ever.” Jumping out of the car, I ran after her, afraid that if she got too far ahead, I’d never find her on these darkened streets.

“Me too take!” DeeDee barked.

“Don’t you dare,” God roared. “She hasn’t recovered from being stabbed by your homicidal boyfriend.”

“He wasn’t my boyfriend,” I muttered, hurrying back to the car.

“I need you to stay here and guard the car,” I said to the Doberman. “Can you do that?”

“Yes!” she barked.

“But quietly,” I told her. “Guard it quietly.”

“Guard quiet,” she panted.

“Good girl.” I turned around just in time to see Gypsy round the corner, onto what I assumed was Oak. I raced after her, Gasping for breath with a stitch that made it feel like
I’d
been stabbed in the side, I couldn’t help but think that maybe my friend Alice was onto something for suggesting I take up running. I was so focused on that thought that I almost plowed into Gypsy who’d come to a dead stop in the middle of the sidewalk.

“Shhhh!” Grabbing my arm, she dragged me against the side of a building. Her fingers that wrapped around my wrist were ice cold.

We watched as a man, fiftyish, carrying a large knapsack approached a building further down the street.

“Do you know him?” I whispered.

“No, but he’s got a lot of ghosts with him.”

“A lot?” I asked, suddenly even more frightened than I had been.

“And they’re upset.”

That didn’t sound good. I snatched my phone from her other hand and dialed Zeke for the third time. Again, he didn’t pick up.

I considered calling the B&B to see if either of the Griswalds had returned, but I didn’t know what I’d say to them besides,
“Can you come help me? The medium thinks some women are being held against their will.”

The man, who I mentally dubbed ‘Buzz’ because of his severely short haircut, disappeared inside the building.

We were about to step out of the shadows to follow Buzz when a car pulled onto the street. Pressing ourselves against the wall, we watched as two men got out alongside the building Buzz had entered.

Gypsy gasped.

I clapped a hand over her mouth to keep her from making any more noise. I may not be psychic, but I know trouble when I see it. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that the two men were dangerous. “Shhh,” I whispered harshly. “Are you trying to get us killed?”

Shaking her head, two fat tears splashed on my hand. I considered letting her go, but was terrified she’d sob and draw attention to us. Instead I stood there, holding my breath, praying they’d move.

Once they’d gone inside, I removed my hand. “Do you know them?”

“Th-they killed him.”

“Your boss?”

“He’s with them.” Weak-kneed she sank to the ground, hugging her legs to her chest.

I stared at her for a long moment trying to figure out what to do. Finally I said, “I’m going to go get a closer look.”

She nodded.

“Did you want to come with me?”

She shook her head.

Swallowing hard, I squared my shoulders and crept toward the building, clinging to the shadows.

“Let me get this straight,” God whispered. “You’re unarmed, don’t have a plan, and you’re sneaking up on some murderers?”

“What choice do I have?” I whispered back.

“You could call the redhead.”

“And say what? That I think there’s something untoward going on in there? He’s already pissed at me for taking Katie out of the hospital. I’m not even sure he’d show up if I try to lead him down here on a wild goose chase.”

“At least let me go in and get the lay of the land,” the lizard offered.

I halted. That actually wasn’t a bad idea. He’d been my lookout before in equally dangerous situations and we were both still here to tell the stories.

Reaching into my bra, I gently drew him out. “You have ten minutes.”

“I can do the job in five,” he countered as I put him down on the ground. He scurried away, leaving me alone in the shadows.

To keep my mind occupied, I tried to figure out what other meaning Armani’s prediction could mean. After all, she once told me to “meet the man” which hadn’t meant I should meet Paul, the guy God referred to as my “homicidal boyfriend” like I’d thought. What it had actually meant was that I needed to pick up a leg of lamb and use it as a club on Gary the Gun, a naked, tumescent, blackmailing assassin.

I kept mentally rearranging the Scrabble letters I’d pulled into as many permutations as I could think of. I came up with:
Dire Wed

Dire Dew

Wed Ride

Wed Drew

Rewired

Ewe Ride

Red Wire

Err Wide

I Dew Err

I decided I Dew Err was probably the most likely choice, but I didn’t know if it meant that Armani was the one who erred, or if I was the one who was screwing up. Lord knows I did enough of that on a daily basis.

It seemed like hours, but was probably only a minute or two before someone crossed my path, but it wasn’t the snarky reptile, it was Buzz. Only this time he wasn’t carrying his knapsack. He was in such a hurry to get out of there that he didn’t even notice me standing a few yards away.

He practically sprinted for his car and tore away, tires squealing, leaving the scent of burnt rubber in his wake.

“Where are you?” I muttered into the darkness, hoping the lizard would reply.

“I’m here,” Gypsy whispered from right behind me.

“Aaaah!” I shouted, startled.

“Shhh!”

“Don’t sneak up on me like that.” I clutched my chest, feeling like my heart was going to beat its way right out of it.

“What are you waiting for?” Gypsy asked.

For a split second I considered confessing to the medium that I have the ability to talk to animals, and had sent my niece’s pet lizard ahead as a scout, but then I thought better of it. “I meant Zeke,” I lied smoothly. “I’m waiting for Zeke.”

“We can’t wait for him.”

“We can’t go barging in there.”

Gypsy gasped horrified, “I can’t go in there. The place is full of ghosts.”

“It’s going to have more ghosts if you don’t do something.” God’s voice came from out of nowhere. “There’s a bomb.”

“There’s a bomb,” I told Gypsy.

“How do you know?”

“It was in the knapsack of the man who left,” God told me.

“That guy didn’t carry out his bag,” I said to Gypsy.

“Here,” I thrust the phone at her. “Go back to the car and call 9-1-1.”

“Nobody’s calling nobody,” a menacing male voice said from behind us.

Gypsy raised her arms in surrender.

Before I knew what was happening, the phone had been snatched away and something small and hard was being thrust into my ribs.

“Inside,” our captor growled.

“You officially suck as a lookout,” I muttered to God.