Authors: Malcolm Bradbury
Howard drives back towards the stage and scene of his own. In the kitchen, Barbara is absent; he hears water running in the bathroom. He sets to, and opens bottles; he walks about the house, arranging furniture, setting out spaces and counterspaces. The darkness is down already; he stands in his bedroom, while glow lights the battered houses opposite, and fixes lights. Barbara comes out of the bathroom, and he goes in. He strips and takes a bath, powders himself, and goes through into the bedroom to dress. Barbara is in there, putting on a bright silvery dress. âIs it all right?' she says. âWhere did you get it?' asks Howard. âI bought it in London,' says Barbara. âYou never tried it on for me,' he says. âNo,' says Barbara, âI offered, but you'd not got time.' âIt's nice,' says Howard. âYes,' says Barbara, âhe had very good taste.' Barbara goes out of the bedroom; Howard begins to dress himself, smartly, neatly, for the fray. The children come in, and run around. âWill the people make as much mess as they did last time?' asks Martin. âI don't think so,' says Howard, ânot so many of them.' âI hope nobody jumps out of the window again,' says Celia. âNobody jumped out of the window,' says Howard. âSomeone just hurt himself a bit.' âUncle Henry,' says Martin. âIs he coming?' âI don't know,' says Howard, âI'm not sure who's coming.' âSupposing nobody comes,' says Celia, âwho'll eat all that cheese?' âNot me,' says Martin. âOh, lots of people will come,' says Howard, âyou'll see.'
And lots of people do come. The cars roar in the terrace. Howard goes to the front door to open it for the first guests; the bright lights from the house fall across the damaged pavements, and shine on the debris and demolition of the street. The guests walk into the glow, towards the step; here is Moira Millikin, carrying her baby, and behind her the Macintoshes, each of them bearing a baby in a carrycot; Mrs Macintosh, when she did deliver, delivered in bulk, and had twins. Barbara comes down the hall, wearing her silvery showpiece and a large Russian necklace, her hair done in a social bun. âYour lovely parties,' says Moira, coming inside, taking off her cape, showing her pregnant bulge, âCan we stick this one somewhere?' âAnd these,' says Mrs Macintosh, looking very thin, with just a small loose bounce at the stomach where not all fitness is back. âHello, Kirks,' says Dr Macintosh, taking off his macintosh, âAre we the first ones again?' âGreat to see you, come inside,' say the hospitable Kirks, a welcoming couple, both at once. No sooner are the first arrivals in the living room, with drinks, talking breastfeeding, when more guests arrive. The room fills. There are students in quantities; bearded Jesus youths in combat-wear, wet-look plastic, loon-pants, flared jeans, Afghan yak; girls, in caftans and big boots, with plum-coloured mouths. There are young faculty, serious, solemn examiners of matrimony and its radical alternatives; there are strangers from the Kirks' general acquaintance â a radical vicar, an Argentinian with obscure guerrilla associations, an actor in moleskin trousers who has touched Glenda Jackson in a Ken Russell film. Minnehaha Ho has come, in a cheongsam; Anita Dollfuss, with her big brown dog on a string, is here, fresh from months of sleeping through seminar after seminar. Barbara, in her bright green eye-shadow, her silvery dress, appears here and there, with her plates of food: âEat,' she says, âit's sociable.' Howard goes about, a big two-litre bottle hanging on the loop from his finger, the impresario of the event, feeling the buoyant pleasure of having these young people round him, patched, harlequinned, embroidered, self-gratifying, classless, citizens of a world of expectation, a world beyond norms and forms. He pours wine, seeing the bubbles move inside the glass of the bottle in the changing lights of his rooms. The party booms; a jet out of Heathrow roars over the top of the town; a police car heehaws away on the urban motorway; in the abandoned houses opposite the little lights flicker, and behind them the expanding urban waste.
Inside the party grows, thickens, becomes fissiparous. Space fills up; activity is forced back through the premises, into new rooms with new colours on the walls and hence new psychic possibilities, rooms with new tests to perform, for there is food spread on a table in the dining room, and a space for dancing in the Victorian conservatory, and recesses of intimacy and silence upstairs. Somewhere someone has found a record player and set it going; somewhere else in the house a guitar is playing. âHi,' says Melissa Todoroff, arriving in a tartan dress, âI salute the radical hero. I think you're wonderful, I think you're tops.' âLet me take your coat,' says Howard. âThanks,' says Melissa. âNow. Where do I go to get laid?' In the hall the bra-less girl from Howard's seminar, still bra-less, is explaining the philosophy of Hegel in detail to the actor who has laid hand on Glenda Jackson, and has now laid hand on the bra-lessness. âIt's eminently a dialectical portrait,' says the girl. âDon't pinch.' In the living room, the familiar group or coterie from the Radical Student Alliance stand together in a corner, solemn, looking a little like the scene at the Last Supper after the guests have risen. They are being accosted by Miss Callendar, who wears a bright thin caftan, and has let loose her hair, and is saying, âHello, what have you all come as?' In the Victorian conservatory, where the dancing is desultory, Barbara stands in silver, talking to Minnehaha Ho, who is wide-eyed and solitary against the wall. âWhat kind of contraceptive do you use?' Barbara is asking, in her sociable concern. On the landing Felicity Phee, in her same long skirt, is talking to Dr Macintosh. âThe awful thing is,' says Felicity, âI thought I'd found out where I was and now I'm there it's not where I am at all. If you see what I mean.' âI do,' says Dr Macintosh sagely, âthat's it, isn't it? Existence never stops. The self keeps going on, endlessly.' âOh, I know, Dr Macintosh,' says Felicity, âyou're so right.' In one of the rooms off the upstairs landing, a mattress that Howard has thoughtfully laid out beforehand is squeaking in one of the familiar rhythms of the universe.
There is turmoil in the hall; Anita Dollfuss's dog has bitten the radical vicar, and compassionate persons take him away upstairs for treatment. âI'm sorry, Howard,' says Anita, âyou'll stop inviting me. He tried to pat him. He should have patted me.' The dog pants happily at Howard, who says: âThat reminds me, you've not seen Dr Beamish, have you?' âNo, I haven't,' says Anita Dollfuss, in her long long dress, her hair in its Alice headband, âI don't think he's here.' He walks about with his bottle, upstairs, downstairs; Henry has clearly neglected to come. An uneasy instinct takes him to the closed door of the guest bedroom. He taps; there is no answer. He opens the door; the room is dark. The window is in place. âDo you mind, please?' says the voice of Dr Macintosh, âI'm afraid this is occupied.' âI'm sorry,' says Howard. âIt's Howard,' says Felicity. âWe don't want you, Howard. Why don't you find your Miss Callendar?' He goes downstairs again into the party. There is no Henry, there is no Flora, and now, it seems, there is no Barbara; the spread of food is devastated, and the hands that tend it seem to have found other, better pastures. With hostly compunction, Howard goes into the kitchen. He stands in front of the wallpaper celebrating the lines of onions and garlics; he stands in front of the pine shelves, with their scatter of selected objects: the French casseroles, the row of handthrown pottery mugs in light brown, the two pepper-mills, the line of deep blue Spanish glasses from Casa Pupo, the dark brown pot saying
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. In front of him, in a rush basket, lie ten long French loaves; Howard stands at the pine table, and neatly, crisply he slices the crusty bread. The room is his, but then the door opens. Myra Beamish stands there, wearing a dress that looks as if it has been made from sacking. âThere you are,' she says, coming in, âyou look like an extremely trendy peasant. Where's Barbara?' âI don't know,' says Howard, âshe seems to have disappeared, so I'm doing this.' âOh, ho,' says Myra, sitting down on the edge of the table in her sacking dress. âWell, never mind, you seem to be doing a great job. Do you cook too?' âI have a few specialities,' says Howard. âWell, Howard, I must try them sometime,' says Myra.
âHas Henry come?' asks Howard. âNo, Henry's not coming,' says Myra, âhe's sitting at home very depressed because he can't get on with his book.' âI thought he saved most of his notes,' says Howard. âHe may have saved them,' says Myra, âbut with one arm in a sling and the other broken and in plaster he can't really write very well.' âI suppose not,' says Howard, âbut he could come to a party.' âWell, Howard,' says Myra, âhe doesn't want to see you. He does blame you, you know. You did encourage them.' âBut he's usually so good at seeing the other point of view,' says Howard, âand politics isn't a bloodless business.' âI thought it was horrible,' says Myra, âall those screaming people. I panicked, I ran out.' âAny sensible person would have panicked,' says Howard. âYou're teasing,' says Myra, âyou know I'm very bad about these things. I know I'm very square.' âBut anyway you came, Myra,' says Howard. âWell, I don't do all that Henry wants me to do,' says Myra, âin fact, I rather do what he doesn't want me to do. I felt like seeing you, you lovely man.' There is a stir on the table; Myra suddenly leans forward and kisses Howard, catching him obliquely on the nose. âThat's to say Merry Christmas,' she says. âAh,' says Howard, âMerry Christmas to you.' Myra bends seriously over her black handbag, and dips down into it. âI don't suppose,' she says, taking something from the bag, âI don't suppose you still remember that time in my bedroom.' Howard looks at her; she has taken out a mirror, and, her head down, her nose shining under the overhead light, she is inspecting her lipstick, her mouth open in an O. âA very long time ago, Myra,' says Howard. âI know you've been everywhere since then,' says Myra, âtoured the parish. But come again sometime, won't you? It would be different. I was silly then. I'm not so bloody bourgeois now. I know what I missed.' âBut what about you and Henry?' asks Howard, âI thought you were back together again.' âYou and Barbara are back together again,' says Myra, âbut you have an advanced marriage. It doesn't keep you on a very tight rein, does it? We did hear all the rumours about what Mr Carmody found out.' âDon't believe all that,' says Howard. âNo, Barbara and I have learned to accept each other's lifestyles.' âYou mean Barbara's learned to accept yours,' says Myra, âor has to, for want of a better.' âIt works both ways,' says Howard. âAnyway,' says Myra, âHenry's got to accept mine. We're back together, Howard. But on my terms, Howard boy, on my terms. It's one of those intelligent marriages, now.'
âBut what does Henry get from it?' asks Howard. âIs it fair to Henry?' âI don't understand you, Howard,' says Myra, âthis unwonted concern. Henry had Flora Beniform. So I can do what I like. Isn't that right?' âOh, Flora is primarily therapy,' says Howard. âOh, I know you've been round there, too,' says Myra, âFlora is primarily the classic bitch done up in modern dress. But I'm sure you are too, Howard.' âA bitch?' asks Howard. âNo,' says Myra, âtherapy. And we all need treatment. It's the age of treatment. I'm asking for some.' âBut I can't help thinking about Henry,' says Howard, âhow is he? He's depressed, he's helpless, doesn't he need you?' âThis isn't like you, Howard,' says Myra. âI'm concerned for Henry,' says Howard. âYou hold him in contempt,' says Myra, âyou and your cohorts break his arm and smash his nose, when he's trying to do something moderately decent. You despise his mores. And then, when nobody needs it, you express concern for him. He'd rather be without it, Howard. Devote it to me.' âYoo-hoo, baby,' says Melissa Todoroff, standing a little unsteadily in the doorway in her tartan dress, âhow about splashing some of that wine you're hiding into my glass?' âI'm sorry, Melissa,' says Howard, picking up a bottle. âOr maybe you should just pour it, right, down, my, little throat,' says Melissa Todoroff, coming into the room. âAm I neglecting you?' asks Howard, pouring wine. âYou sure are,' says Melissa, putting an arm through his, âyou haven't come near me for ages.' âHow's the party?' asks Howard. âThere are things going on out there,' says Melissa, âthat would make your nipples pucker. Well, hi there, Myra. How's it going?' âI'm just going,' says Myra, picking up her bag, âI'd better go back to Henry, hadn't I?' âUh-huh, uh-huh,' says Melissa, watching as Myra walks out of the door, in her sacklike dress, âdid I do something?' âI don't know,' says Howard, detaching his arm, and beginning to slice bread again, âof course you did once throw a bread bun at Henry.' âOh, God, I did, that's right,' says Melissa Todoroff, with a gay, hacking chuckle, âand then we trampled him underfoot. Is she sore?' âI don't know whether Myra's sore,' says Howard, âbut â¦' âBut Henry sure is sore,' says Melissa, âhe has a sore face and a sore arm and a sore ass and he's sore.'
âThat's right,' says Howard. âWell, he got in the way of justice,' says Melissa, âyou know what they say, if you don't like the heat, get out of the kitchen. Maybe that's why she got out of the kitchen.' âMaybe,' says Howard. âOh, boy, wasn't that a day?' says Melissa Todoroff, reminiscent, âI really blew my mind. What a trip. Freedom and liberation seemed really real. The people chanting, the crowds roaring, all crying for goodness. It was Berkeley, Columbia, Vincennes. We were all so beautiful. Then, zap, with the bread bun. Things were so wide open and easy. Will we ever be like that again?' âIt was only a couple of weeks ago, Melissa,' says Howard. âYou know what they say,' says Melissa, âa week's a long time in politics. Fantastic. There was action then. People really felt something. But what happened to it?' âIt's around,' says Howard. âYou know what's the matter with people now?' says Melissa, very seriously, âThey just don't feel any more.' âNot the way they did last week,' says Howard. âThey sure don't feel
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any more,' says Melissa. âThe night's young,' says Howard. âNot as young as it used to be,' says Melissa. âBut I mean, seriously, who, anywhere, now, is getting down to the real, root, radical problems of the age?' âWho?' asks Howard. âI'll tell you whom,' says Melissa, ânobody, that's whom. Who's authentic any more?' âYou seem pretty authentic,' says Howard, slicing bread. âOh, God, no, Christ, really, do I?' says Melissa Todoroff, agonizing. âDo I really seem like that to you? I'm not, How, it's just a front. I'm more authentic than these other bastards, but I'm not authentic the way I mean authentic.' âYou are, Melissa,' says Howard. âYou're giving me shit,' says Melissa Todoroff, âyou're a good guy but you're giving me shit.' Melissa Todoroff walks towards the door, precariously carrying her glass of wine; she says, âI'm going right back there into that party and then, wow, watch out.' At the door she stops. âI don't care what your friends say about you, you're a good guy,' she says, âa radical's radical. And if you really work at it, you could be a radical's radical's radical.'