The Heart's Ashes (85 page)

Morgaine laughed and waved her hand. “That much is
translatable; it’s the section regarding the
child
we can’t decipher, because
that part doesn’t exist. We only know that she brings the change
which will see Drake destroyed—and that she will have great
power.”

“
So, we’re gonna go in there, catch ourselves a nice, juicy
vampire, store him in a cell for fifteen or so years, until my
child, who is not even conceived, or known to be
possible
to conceive, is
born, then we’re gonna thaw him out and kill him?”

Everyone
looked at their hands.

“
That’s the plan.” Morgaine winced.

“
Then we need a better plan.” I slammed the palm of irritation
onto the table.

“
Amara, all that matters is destroying Drake. How ever we do
that. Child or not.”

“
Can’t we reason with him?”

They all
looked at me and burst out laughing, including Eric who at least
covered his mouth first.

“
A reasonable Council member?” Morgaine chortled.

“
Yeah, maybe we can have them over for a cuppa,” Mike added,
“Ask his mummy to tell him not pick on us anymore.”

“
Fine.” I stood up. “Laugh—all of you, but you’ll see. I’m
going to find a way to win this war. Not every conflict needs to
end in destruction.” The smiles dropped from their
faces.

“
It does when you’re dealing with guys like Drake,” Mike
said.

“
How do you know? Has anyone
tried
talking it out with
him—ever?”

“
Princess Amara, he’s evil. There is no talking to
him.”

“
You don’t know that, Morgaine—maybe he just needs to learn
that kindness can win more hearts than cruelty.” I stood up and
stormed out of the house, leaving my small council with their
mouths gaping.

The steam of
my temper trailed behind, forming a cloud of hopelessness as I
stopped by the lake across the road. The cool breeze brushed my
hair back behind me and I rolled my face upward, casting my sombre
gaze to the stars. So many times I’d wished on them, so many times
I cried for my dreams failing, but I finally had the one thing I
asked for, well, the two things: immortality and David. But it
wasn’t supposed to be like this. How does a girl, fresh out of high
school, become a queen? I can’t even keep my room tidy, now they
want me to capture and kill a man who can rip a human apart with
his bare hands?

A high-pitched
whimper snapped me from my bubble of reflection; I looked down to
the warm, fluffy life form by my leg. “Hey, boy.”

The dog nudged
me with the brow of his nose.

“
Yeah, I’m sad, boy. I just don’t think any of them get it.
I’ve never been one for the whole murder thing, so, I don’t
know…maybe I’m wrong, but killing Drake doesn’t seem to make us any
better than he is, right?” I squatted down and ruffled my fingers
between his ears. “Where do we draw the line?”

“
What was
that
all about?”

I jumped to my
feet and swiped tears from my cheeks as Mike stormed across the
road. He was so much bigger now, his shirts tight across his chest,
growing with the strength of immortality; I’d be scared of him if I
didn’t know he was such a marshmallow.

“
What was
what
all about?”

Petey leaned
against my leg, half sitting on my foot.

“
That little speech about
kindness
winning hearts
?”

I turned away
from him and shook my head.

“
Is this about Jason?”

“
Leave Jason out of this.”

“
Did you think I wouldn’t catch on, Ara?”

“
What are you talking about?” I asked.

“
I’m not stupid, baby.” The heat came off his body as he stood
closer, right behind me. “I know you have some messed up delusion
that he was good—deep down inside or some bullshit like
that.”

“
So what if I do?” I folded my arms and headed for the
house.

“
No.” Mike grabbed my arm; “I’m not doing this with you again.
You forgave him once. You trusted him—and look what he did to
you.”

I jerked out
of his grip. “How I feel is none of your business.”

“
Yes, it is, Ara,” he yelled, then softened. “You too easily
forgive—it’s your greatest asset, but could also be your downfall.
It’s my job, as your friend, to save you from yourself. You have to
let this go.”

“
I
am
letting it go, Mike.” I folded my arms over my chest. “But
Jason wasn’t bad. He just got hurt—made a few wrong choices, and
lost his life for it.”

“
We all make choices, Ara,” he reasoned, “and it’s what we
choose to do in those moments that defines us.”

“
You don’t know anything.” I turned away again.

“
Yes, I do. I heard Arthur.” He spun me around. “I heard about
the blood oath—Ara, who cares? He hurt you, and it can only take a
monster to do that to a sweet, beautiful thing like you. If you
forgive every person that walks in with a good reason to hurt you,
you could be jeopardising many lives, baby. You have the
responsibility of a nation in your hands now.”

“
No.” I shook my head. “Not now—soon. But not now.”

“
Do you see any other queens around here?” Mike yelled,
looking around. “Do you see anyone making decisions for our
people?”

I rolled my
chin to my chest with a soft sigh.

“
The time is now, Amara.” He stepped into me and thrust my
chin up with his finger. “You have to take your place as queen, and
you have to start thinking like one.”

“
Amara?” I smiled.

“
Sorry. That’s what they all call you. Guess it’s rubbing
off.”

“
Mike, don’t worry about me, okay?” I breathed out and stepped
back. “I’ll do what they want me to do. I’ll be their queen, and
I’m not going to forgive and befriend every monster that kicks me.
But when it comes to Jason?” I searched my mind for the words.
“He’s complicated.”

“
It’s not complicated, Ara. He hurt you—you don’t forgive
that,” Mike stated.

“
If only it were that simple in my heart.” I turned away,
ashamed of my own feelings.

“
It is.” Mike placed his hands on my arms from behind. “You
use the memory of that pain to change the way you feel.”

“
No. It doesn’t change things, and it doesn’t change the fact
that, while I’m trying to deal with all of this in my mind, there’s
something worse out there—waiting to destroy everyone I love.” I
looked down.

“
You don’t need to be scared baby.” He squeezed me tighter,
then gently turned my shoulders until I faced him. “You know I’ll
protect you.”

“
I know.” I smiled. “But I’m not afraid of getting hurt. I’m
afraid of failing—of not being the queen the Lilithians
need.”

“
Aw.” Mike hugged me tightly. “Baby, the fact that you feel
that way just shows your strength. You won’t let them down, because
it matters to you; it’s your obligation
and
your hope to serve them
well.”

“
I hope you’re right, Mike,” I said with a sigh. “Like you
said, I have the responsibility of a nation in my
hands.”

Chapter
29

Petey sat by
the front door with an irritated Mike a few steps away from him,
dog lead in hand. “Petey,” Mike said, “you have to wear this. It’s
against the law to walk a dog without a lead.”

Petey shook
his head, followed by the rest of his body, and sat down with his
pink tongue hanging out.

“
Petey?” I put my hands on my hips and stared down at him. “Do
you want to go for a run with Mike?”

He yawned, a
high-pitched whine seeping out as he slumped down and flopped onto
his side.

“
Fine.” Mike put the lead on the table by the door. “I’ll go
by myself.”

“
Are you running human style, or—”

“
Depends.” He looked back at me with a glint in his eye. “Will
you come with me if I run Lilithian style?”

“
You know what, I just might.” I looked down. “These shoes’ll
do for running, yeah?”

“
Meh.” Mike shrugged. “They’ll do. Just keep those laces done
up.”

“
Oh, right.” I bent down to tie the lace, and when I looked up
at the door, Petey sat with the lead in his mouth, his head
cocked.

“
Petey.” I took the lead away. “You can’t run as fast as we
can—you have to stay here.”

He whined and
dropped to his front paws, his hind legs following.

“
Too late, mate, you had your chance.” Mike pointed at him,
sounding very Australian all of a sudden.

Petey huffed,
his ears folding back slightly.

“
Come on.” Mike grinned and took my hand. “I’ll race you to
the lake.”

“
Click your fingers—I’ll be there before you
finish.”

After an hour
running, we huffed over to the park bench and I propped my foot up
to tie my shoelace—again. “What?” I asked Mike when he folded his
arms, shaking his head.

“
I’m gonna miss you when I go back to the manor.”

“
Yeah—I always miss you when you go.” I put both feet back on
the ground.

“
But it’s different this time.” He scratched the back of his
head. “I won’t see you again ‘til I pick you up in a few
weeks.”

“
Well, just think, I’ll be at the manor by summer, then you
won’t have to miss me ever again.”

Mike linked
his arm through mine and we walked toward the edge of the lake.
“You’re getting faster,” he noted, but looked at my sweaty brow.
“And I saw you practicing friction manipulation the other day. You
did things you haven’t shown me yet.”

“
Yeah. I figured out a few tricks. I’ll show you later.” I let
out a deep breath. “I just wish I could magically heal my husband,
though. You never get the power you want.” I clicked my fingers
once and shook my head.

Mike dropped a
quick kiss on my brow then went to sit on the park bench. “He’ll
heal. Emily’s using some herb, isn’t she? Some super-healing
thing?”

“
Uh yeah, it’s just Wild Indigo. But it’s supposed to promote
rapid cell re-production in vampires. She says that, mixed with
vampire blood, it can have amazing effects.”

Mike nodded.
“You do understand, don’t you, that he won’t be able to come to the
manor for some time—even when he heals? People have to bel—”

“
I know, I know. They have to believe he’s dead.” I groaned.
“I know. What I don’t know is how I’m going to survive without
him?”

“
You have me.” Mike flashed a mischievous smirk.

“
Yeah, I know.”
You’ve always been my
consolation.

“
And Emily will take good care of him while we’re gone. It
won’t be long ‘til the Knight’s Core is complete, and once that
happens, it’s only a matter of time before we catch ourselves a big
bad vampire. Then David can announce himself as king.”

“
Yeah—it’s the catching Drake thing I’m worried
about.”

“
Wait ‘til you meet the knights. You’ll see. There’s no need
to worry at all. Some of them—the original knights—are really cool.
I, personally, cannot wait to go after Drake. Maybe he can give us
a real fight.” Mike clasped his fingers together and flexed them
outward, grinning wildly.

“
Don’t be an advocate for war, Mike. I’m still not sure
killing Drake is the best option.”

“
Of course you’re not, baby, you’re a little girl. You can’t
understand the difference between doing what’s wrong for good and
doing what’s stupid for a misinformed idea of what’s
virtuous.”

I sat quietly
for a minute. “You know, I’ll be queen in a few weeks, then you
can’t speak to me like that anymore, Mike.”

He bumped me
with his elbow, smirking wider. “I still will.”

The soft
rising and falling of David’s chest soothed the emptiness in my
heart for the absence of his mind from this world. I’d never take
his breath, his words, or his smile for granted, ever again.

I sat on the
edge of his bed and stroked my thumb over his newly-grown eyebrow.
From the outside, aside from looking a little sunburnt, he was
otherwise perfect—the old David. But, inside, he was still raw and
grated. Morgaine said he’d probably look something like a saucy
cheese pizza. Consequently, I haven’t been able to eat pizza since
then.

In some ways,
despite him still being in so much pain, I was glad he’d healed on
the outside, because I wasn’t sure how much longer I could go on
seeing him like that.

“
Happy six week anniversary, David,” I whispered softly and
kissed his forehead—my lips barely touching his skin.

“
Ara.”

A hand grabbed
mine, and my lips froze above his face. “Did I hurt you?”

“
No. I just needed to touch you.” His voice sounded clearer
today. “You always run away so quickly.”

“
I’m sorry. I just thought I was hurting you.”