Read The Grand Budapest Hotel Online
Authors: Wes Anderson
HENCKELS
Cease fire! Cease fire! Stop it!
The gunfire pauses. Everyone remains poised for the next volley. Henckels hollers:
Who’s shooting who?
DMITRI
(
behind his barricade
)
That’s Gustave H.! The escaped murderer and art thief! I’ve got him cornered!
M. Gustave and Zero remain tucked against the walls on the floor of the service elevator. M. Gustave yells, enraged:
M. GUSTAVE
That’s Dmitri Desgoffe und Taxis! He’s responsible for the killings of Deputy Kovacs, Serge X. and his club-footed sister, plus his own mother!
HENCKELS
(
hesitates
)
No
body move!
Every
body’s under arrest!
There is a loud creak, then a crashing bang. M. Chuck squints at an open window in a small alcove across from him.
M. CHUCK
Who’s out the window?
Zero looks to M. Gustave. He says, under his breath:
ZERO
Agatha!
Zero sprints out of the service elevator and races up the corridor. Dmitri starts shooting again. The entire group opens fire once more. Zero runs, crouched, with his hands over his head, and ducks into the alcove. His head thrusts out the window. He looks down.
Cut to:
Agatha swinging by one hand from a broken trellis off the end of a terrace three flights below. She hangs onto the wrapped painting with her other hand. She notices something on it and frowns.
Insert:
The dangling package. A section of the wrapping paper has torn away, and the corner of a pale-pink envelope is visible pasted to the back of the picture.
Zero stares down at Agatha, horrified. He mutters to himself:
ZERO
310-
bis
! (
Shouting to Agatha.
) Hang on! Here I come!
Zero races back through the hail of bullets. He darts past Henckels and down the stairwell. He descends three flights. He crosses the corridor and stops in front of a door labeled
‘310-bis’
. A sign on the knob reads: ‘Do Not Disturb’.
Zero hesitates an instant.
He raps briskly, retreats back across the corridor, lowers his shoulder, and charges with all his strength.
Just as he reaches the door, it swings open to reveal a small, bearded man in a long nightgown. He sidesteps Zero.
Zero stumbles full speed through the sitting room and out the wide-open terrace doors. He slams against the balcony railing and flips over it. Agatha releases the package and grabs Zero’s shirt as he somersaults over her.
Zero’s weight jerks Agatha down with a jolt. They fall together.
Four floors down, Zero and Agatha punch through the canvas roof of the back of the Mendl’s van and disappear inside. Silence.
INT. VAN. DAY
Zero sits up among the chaotic pile of scattered and upturned pink, cardboard pastry-boxes. He gasps and digs for Agatha. She surfaces.
ZERO
Agatha! Are you all right?
AGATHA
(
dazed
)
I think so.
Zero embraces Agatha. He kisses her passionately. He looks into her eyes. She says, woozy:
Something’s on the back of the picture.
ZERO
(
confused
)
What?
Agatha holds a piece of the torn and crumbled wrapping paper. She and Zero both look straight up.
Cut to:
Zero and Agatha’s point-of-view through the hole punched in the roof of the van. Seven floors up, M. Gustave, Henckels, and M. Chuck
lean out the window staring down at them, frozen, while other officers lean out other windows all across the facade. Four floors up, ‘Boy with Apple’, unwrapped, hangs upside-down from a wire below the balcony. It swings gently.
Insert:
The painting, upside-down. A pair of hands flips it over to reveal the pale-pink envelope on the reverse.
Title:
PART 6:
‘THE SECOND COPY OF THE SECOND WILL’
INT. DINING ROOM. DAY
The entire, vast assembly of officers and soldiers stands crowded, murmuring, around a table in the restaurant where M. Gustave, Zero, and Dmitri, all in handcuffs, sit across from Henckels. Agatha stands behind Zero. Marguerite, Laetizia, and Carolina stand behind Dmitri. M. Chuck stands behind Henckels.
Henckels carefully peels the envelope loose from the back of the canvas. He slits it open with a pocket knife and removes a handwritten letter on pale-pink paper. He skims it, then looks to M. Gustave.
MR. MOUSTAFA
(
voice-over
)
She left everything to M. Gustave, of course.
INT. COURTROOM. DAY
M. Gustave on the witness stand. He wears his concierge uniform and is immaculate. The jury listens, enraptured by his testimony. The judge sniffs the air. He looks irritated.
MR. MOUSTAFA
(
voice-over
)
The mansion, known as Schloss Lutz; the factories, which produced weapons, medicine, and textiles; an important newspaper syndicate; and (perhaps you’ve already deduced) this very ‘institution’ – the Grand Budapest Hotel.
Zero, Agatha, Herr Becker, Mr. Mosher, and Anatole watch, entertained, from the gallery.
Insert:
The front page of the
Trans-Alpine Yodel.
Headline:
CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES
.
A photograph shows M. Gustave with the entire staff posing in front of the Grand Budapest. A column below the fold reads, ‘Son of Murdered Countess Disappears without Trace.’
Cut to:
Zero behind the concierge desk. He now wears a uniform identical to M. Gustave’s. He rattles off instructions to Mr. Mosher, Herr Becker, Anatole, and M. Chuck.
MR. MOUSTAFA
(
voice-over
)
He anointed me his successor; and, as the war continued, I served my adopted country from the narrow desk still found against the wall in the next room.
Across the lobby, M. Gustave sits drinking a cocktail with a beautiful, begemmed, ninety-year-old woman. His hand rests on her thigh.
He was the same as his disciples: insecure, vain, superficial, blonde, needy. In the end, he was even rich.
EXT. MOUNTAIN RANGE. DAY
The facade of the Grand Budapest at sunset. The camera glides along the path through the plot of edelweiss and buttercups.
MR. MOUSTAFA
(
voice-over
)
He did not succeed, however, in growing old – nor did my darling Agatha. She and our infant son would be killed two years later by the Prussian
grippe
. (An absurd little disease. Today, we treat it in a single week; but, in those days, many millions died.)
The camera comes to a stop as it reveals the view from the iron-lattice terrace over the crevasse alongside the cascade.
Zero and Agatha hold hands while M. Gustave reads from a Bible, officiating. The other witnesses are the staff of the hotel and the concierges of the Society of the Crossed Keys.
INT. TRAIN COMPARTMENT. DAY
A first-class state room on the express to Lutz. M. Gustave, Zero, and Agatha each hold a glass of chilled, white wine.
MR. MOUSTAFA
(
voice-over
)
On the first day of the occupation, the morning the independent state of Zubrowka officially ceased to exist, we traveled with M. Gustave to Lutz.
M. Gustave checks the color of the wine in the light. It is excellent. Pause.
M. GUSTAVE
In answer to your earlier question, by the way: of course.
Zero looks slightly puzzled. M. Gustave explains, aside, to Agatha:
M. GUSTAVE
Zero asked me about my humble beginnings in the hotel trade. (
To Zero and Agatha both.
) I was, perhaps, for a time, considered the best lobby boy we’d ever
had
at the Grand Budapest. I think I can say that.
This
one – (
pointing to Zero
) finally surpassed me. Although, I must say, he had an exceptional teacher.
ZERO
(
with great affection
)
Truly.
AGATHA
(
reciting
)
‘Whence came these two, radiant, celestial brothers, united, for an instant, as they crossed the stratosphere of our starry window? One from the East, and one from the West.’
M. GUSTAVE
(
impressed
)
Very
good.
M. Gustave kisses Agatha’s hand. Zero frowns.
ZERO
Don’t flirt with her. (
Suddenly.
) Why are we stopping at a barley field again?
The train has, in fact, again come to a halt in the middle of nowhere – but, this time, outside the window, there are tanks, trucks, and a hundred soldiers in black uniforms with long coats. M. Gustave, Zero, and Agatha stare out at them, uneasy.
M. GUSTAVE
I find these black uniforms very drab. I suppose they’re meant to frighten people, but –
Three soldiers appear in the compartment doorway. They are stocky, thick-necked, and armed with carbine rifles. M. Gustave says with his usual air of fancy-meeting-you-here:
M. GUSTAVE
Well, hello there, chaps. We were just talking about you.
SOLDIER 1
(
blankly
)
Documents, please.
M. GUSTAVE
With pleasure – as always.
M. Gustave and Agatha withdraw their passports and present them to the soldier. The soldier flips through them
.
M. GUSTAVE
You’re the first of the enemy forces to whom we’ve been formally introduced. How do you do?
The soldier ignores this comment. He returns the passports to M. Gustave and Agatha and looks to Zero. Zero nervously hands him his little scrap of paper. The soldier frowns and studies it. M. Gustave smiles. He says lightly:
M. GUSTAVE
Plus ça change
, am I right? (
To the soldier.
) That’s a Migratory Visa with Stage Three Worker Status, darling. Read this.