The Girl Who Wasn't (32 page)

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Authors: Heather Hildenbrand

Tags: #romance, #dystopian, #new adult

BOOK: The Girl Who Wasn't
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Other than Linc, Daniel, and Titus, she
is now the only other human I’ve met this side of Twig City who
knows the truth. It feels … ominous.


How do you know so much?” I
ask.


I found out some of it by
accident thanks to parents who argue a lot. Daniel told me
everything else,” she explains.

I don’t doubt it, though I have no idea
why he shared so much when he so obviously doesn’t care about her.
I put all of the condescension and uncaring that is Authentic Raven
into my voice when I say, “You brought me all the way out here to
rub it in that you know my secret?”


No. I brought you out here
to tell you I know where there are many more like you. In this
city. Including your friend Anna.”

I look at Linc. “They weren’t at the
address Obadiah gave us?”

He shakes his head. “It was empty. She
moved them before I got there.”

I glare at Melanie. “You’re holding
them hostage?”

She snorts. “Wrong. I’m hiding
them.”


From who?”


Titus. Twig City. The
world.”

I let that sink in. “They are there …
willingly?”

Pieces are falling into place, even
before she answers with a definitive, “Yes.”


You saved Anna from the
carjacking,” I say.


I was the hijacker,” she
corrects.

I nod because even though I can’t
explain it and even though this girl did in fact try to repeatedly
kill me, I know she has saved and protected Anna. And maybe
others.


Why?” I ask.


My personal reasons?
Because they don’t deserve to be used this way. Neither do you,
though I’m sure you’ll find that sort of maddening coming from me.
Still, I’m sure you’ve realized by now that Titus is a different
sort of bad guy than I am.” I can’t argue with that.


That’s not what Daniel
says,” I tell her.


Daniel just wants revenge.
Pure and simple. Titus took the one thing he loved. Now he’s going
to do the same.”


That’s why he’s filtering
them away,” I say.

She nods. “And that’s why he’ll free
them even though he doesn’t give two shits about them. He’s still
convinced you’re not real. I don’t agree with that part. They call
you products but you are people,” she adds.

Nothing she could’ve said surprises me
more. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”


No,
you
don’t. The science it takes to
create you … you might not have been born from a human womb, Ven,
but you’re human in every sense of the term. Making you believe
otherwise is part of the lie.”

Her words—so contradictory to what I
know as truth—make me angry. I drop Linc’s hand so I can ball it
into a fist. “How do you know all of this?” I demand.


Daniel. Anna … and I’ve
seen it.”


Seen what?”


The data. The conclusive
evidence of testing that proves you have just as much emotion and
ability to feel and experience as we do. Isn’t that what you think
separates you? Isn’t that what they tell you? Humans are
superior—intellectually and emotionally?”


You’ve …” I don’t realize
I’ve taken a step forward until Linc’s hand on my arm gently pulls
me back. “How is that possible?”

She folds her arms and her lids lower.
“I can’t tell you that. I’ve already sold Daniel out by telling you
this much.” Her voice drops to a mumble when she says, “I won’t do
it to anyone else.”

I wonder vaguely who else there is left
to betray, but then the thought is gone and I shake my head in
frustration. “How can you still care what Daniel thinks of you? He
was gathering those Imitations to use them as an army.”


Haven’t you heard a word
I’ve said? The army’s purpose is the same as yours.”


Which is?” Linc
asks.


Freedom from the Creator,”
she says, looking at me. I say nothing, though my stomach flips at
the thought, and she continues. “Despite what he’s done, Daniel’s
intentions are good. Or at least they started out that way. The
grief of losing his mother hit him hard. Knowing she could’ve been
saved …”


An Imitation,” I say, the
story coming together as I remember the little bit Daniel mentioned
just before he wrapped his hands around my throat. “He wanted an
Imitation to save her.”


Titus refused to grow a
product for her, even though harvesting organs probably would’ve
worked. When she died, Daniel vowed to change things. Make the
concept of owning a product more public, accessible.” Her words are
no more than a whisper. “Somewhere along the way …”

She doesn’t finish. She doesn’t have
to. We all know that at some point, his mission became motive and
he crossed a line. I refuse to acknowledge the compassion in her
expression as she speaks of him. I will not feel sorry for
him.


And him wanting me?” I ask.
“Was it just to add me to your army?”


Yes and no. You were
different.” There is something in her voice … guilt.

Beside me, Linc makes a noise that is a
growl and a curse all at once.


How?” I ask.

Her expression is full of something I
don’t understand when she says, “You make him crazy.”

Linc snorts his agreement. “Don’t
exclude yourself from that description,” he says.

She glares at him for a
moment and then turns to me. Her expression softens. It is the
nicest look she’s ever given me. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t see past …
When I look at you, all I see is
her
. And he loves her, the other you.
And I love him so much more than she does and…it makes me hate
her.”

I blink at that—and decide to be
honest. “We have that in common,” I say. We share a
look.

I can feel Linc watching me,
questioning. He doesn’t understand what’s not being said. That for
a split second, Melanie and I are enemies on common ground. “What
is the point of telling me all this?” I say finally.


Bottom line? I’m offering
you the one thing you want.”


You have no idea what I
want.”

She crosses her arms. “In a word?
Freedom. But that’s complicated.” She nods toward my arm. “You
can’t just walk out. Not with that thing still in you. I’m offering
step one.”


Which is?”


The location of your friend
Anna—and all of the others like her.”

I’ve suspected that’s where this was
going, but I am leery. “What do you want in return?”


Kill me.”

I thought nothing she said could’ve
surprised me more than when she’d called me human. I was
wrong.


What?” Linc and I say in
unison.


I’ve heard enough of Titus
Rogen to know what waits for me in there,” she says, nodding up at
Rogen Tower behind us. “Interrogation, torture, starvation. But he
won’t let me die. He’ll just make me want to. Before that happens,
I want one of you to stage my death so I can escape. With
Daniel.”


No.” Linc’s answer is
immediate and final. Melanie doesn’t look surprised. Nor does she
argue. “You can’t expect me to risk something like th—” Linc
begins.


We’ll do it,” I
interrupt.

Linc gapes at me. “Ven, it’s
imposs—”


It’s worth the trade. Save
everyone, or save no one,” I say. I don’t mention that I’m
beginning to understand what Melanie’s saying: I can’t save myself
unless I save them too.

Melanie presses her lips together and
nods appreciatively. Linc shakes his head but doesn’t argue
anymore.


Thank you,” Melanie
says.

I ignore that and ask the question I
can’t shake. “Why go in at all?”

She cocks her head sideways, cutting
from Linc to me in a knowing look. “Love is reckless.”

 

***

 

I know the moment Linc places the call
to inform the house that he is bringing Melanie in. Feet thunder
past my room and radios squawk with grainy, digitized voices
telling each other to hurry to the lobby. The alarm
sounds.

I am supposed to be in bed, appearing
asleep should anyone check, but I cannot still my bare feet from
their pacing.

I have an address.

I don’t know if Melanie was telling the
truth or if it’s a trap. I am choosing to believe the former since
she’s allowing herself to be captured and from this moment on, her
life is essentially in our hands. Before leaving me alone, Linc
assured me we will go together in the morning to the address she’s
given. I don’t want to wait even that long, but we have no choice.
There won’t be a chance before then, not with all of the excitement
unfolding as a result of her capture.

I have no idea what I will tell Titus
to get away long enough to check it out, but I can’t focus to think
of anything. I am too distracted by what Melanie said—and
everything it could mean.

My thoughts are disjointed, incomplete.
I am human. Somewhere in the city, she has a warehouse full of
Imitations. All of them have found a way to disable or remove their
kill switch. I am human. She was helping Anna. And others like us.
If she is telling the truth, there is scientific data suggesting I
am just as much human as someone womb-born. I am human.

Someone knocks and I jump and then
freeze in place. A security guard sticks his head in. “Miss Rogen.”
He looks surprised I am awake.


I heard noises,” I explain.
“Is everything all right?”


Everything’s fine. I need
you to stay in your room until I come back.”

I assure him I will—not that my
assurance is needed when the door locks from the outside—and he
leaves without another word. I resume pacing. A few minutes later,
the alarm ceases and the house is silent.

I am human.

An hour later, Linc returns. “Where is
she?” I whisper as he closes the door behind him.


She’s downstairs,” he says,
his voice giving away exhaustion.


And Titus?”


Already interrogating
her.”


Do you think she’ll
talk?”


I don’t know. Titus will be
ruthless.”


If they’re where she said,
we’ll have to move them. If he finds them, he’ll kill them all.” He
nods. I know he’s already thought of this. “You don’t have to help
me,” I add.

He frowns. “I’m not letting you do this
alone.”


Linc ... maybe you should.”
His brows knit in confusion, but I press on. It needs to be said.
“Whatever is at that address is my problem. But it doesn’t have to
be yours. The risk you’re taking—”


Is mine to take,” he
interrupts. “I meant what I said about not letting you do this
alone.”


If Titus finds out you’re
involved, he’ll kill you.”


He could try,” he says
fiercely.


He might kill you
anyway.”


Why would he do
that?”

My heart beats erratically against my
chest but I say the thing I’m scared to say. “Because he knows I’m
in love with you.”

I wait for his expression to change,
for dismay or anxiety or something like it to sweep his features at
the thought of what Titus could do to him for this, but instead a
slow smile creeps across his mouth and he steps closer so that our
faces are almost touching. His hands cup my hips. “Say it again,”
he whispers.


Titus might
kill—”


Not that part. The other
thing.”

For some reason, I feel incredibly shy.
I force myself to look at him and slowly, I repeat the words. “I
love you.”

He presses his lips to my cheek.
“Again.”


I love you,” I say with
more confidence.

He lifts his lips from my cheek,
presses them to my neck. “Again.”

I’m smiling now. “I love
you.”

He continues to press kisses to my
jawline, slowly making his way to my mouth. I say it three more
times before our lips finally meet. I can tell by the shape of his
mouth as it finds mine that he is smiling too. The kiss is a tangle
of lips and fingertips and arms and parallel friction. I am
breathless and tingling when he pulls his mouth far enough from
mine to whisper, “I love you too, angel.”

Joy, bigger than anything I’ve ever
experienced, surges into my chest. It is a feeling so solid, it
seems touchable. If this is what it’s like to be human … and then I
realize—this is what it’s like to be me.

Ven. An Imitation in love. How is this
possible?

Linc catches sight of my expression and
his head tilts. “You look so far away. What are you
thinking?”


That this is the happiest
I’ve ever been and …” I stare at my gauzy curtains without really
seeing them.

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