The Gift (29 page)

“It sounds like you have a lot of responsibility on your shoulders right now. Trying to be both mother and father to your boy must be difficult.”

“You’ve got that right, and I feel like I’m failing miserably.”

“I’m sure you’re doing the best you can.”

“I try, but it never seems to be enough.” Cora closed her eyes.

As Leah continued to work on Cora’s feet, she lifted a silent prayer on her behalf. Just the stress of what Cora was going through right now was reason enough for her back to have tightened.

“If this foot treatment helps, which I’m hoping it will, don’t hesitate to call me again,” Leah said.

“I certainly will, and danki for letting me blow off a little steam.”

“Is that another word you learned from your patients at the clinic?”

Cora smiled. “Jah.”

As Priscilla sat across the table from Elam at the pizza shop, a lump formed in her throat. When he’d suggested they come here tonight, she’d decided this might be a good time to break things off. Of course, if he brought up the subject of marriage, she would reconsider. The question was, what excuse should she give Elam for breaking up? She couldn’t simply blurt out that she didn’t want to see him anymore because he hadn’t asked her to marry him.

Priscilla took a drink of root beer and stared at the pizza on her plate as she continued to mull things over.

“Aren’t you hungerich? You’ve hardly touched your pizza.” Elam gestured to her plate. “And you haven’t said more than a few words since we sat down.”

Priscilla set her glass down, watching the bubbles of the root beer rise. “I’ve been thinking.” Not only was she holding back tears, but her stomach felt like it was tied up in knots. Pizza was one of her favorite foods, but tonight Priscilla could hardly eat. Since she’d known Elam so long, would she be comfortable with another suitor if one came along? After all, Elam was kind, and he’d been good to her. But Priscilla wanted more. She wanted marriage, children, and the chance to grow old with the man she loved. What if she broke up with Elam but never fell in love with anyone else?

“What are thinking about?”

Startled, Priscilla jumped. “Umm… I’ve been thinking about us.”

“What about us?” Elam grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite as melted cheese stuck to his lip. “Ouch, that’s hot!”

“Are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine. Just need to be more careful is all.”

Satisfied that Elam hadn’t been seriously burned, Priscilla continued. “We’ve been courting for some time now, right?”

He gave a quick nod.

“Well…” She moistened her lips. “Maybe it’s time that we go our separate ways.” There, it was out. Only trouble was, Priscilla didn’t feel one bit better.

Elam’s eyebrows lifted high on his forehead. “You’re kidding, right?”

She shook her head, holding firm and hoping he wouldn’t try to dissuade her.

“Why now, after all this time, do you wanna break up with me? I thought things were going along good between us.”

“So did I, for a while, at least.” Priscilla paused and cleared her throat. “But things are different now.”

He plunked his elbows on the table and leaned closer to her. “How are they different, Priscilla?”

She turned her head, unable to look into his hazel eyes. This wasn’t going well. She felt like she was backed into a corner.

“You care about me, don’t you, Priscilla?” Elam reached across the table and took hold of her hand.

The feel of his warm skin and the sight of his tender gaze were almost her undoing. She did care about Elam, so how could she break up with him? Maybe if she stuck it out awhile longer, he would finally pop the question.

“Forget I said anything.” Priscilla took a small piece of pizza. “I wasn’t thinking right when I said we should break up.”

A slow smile spread across Elam’s face. “That’s gut, Priscilla. Jah, real good.”

Priscilla drew in a deep breath.
What have I done? Elam will probably never ask me to marry him, and I’ll end up becoming an old maid. Maybe I should have broken up with him, but then, maybe I need to give him another chance.

Before Adam went upstairs to say good night to his nieces, he decided to relax on the porch and watch the stars for a while. The sky was crystal clear, and the stars looked more vivid than ever. He felt like he could reach out and touch them. The Big Dipper hung low in the eastern sky and looked as if it were standing on its handle. The Milky Way stretched out overhead, with its twinkling pathway to the starry heavens.

Coal lay at Adam’s feet, with his head tilted to one side and ears perked as a neighbor’s dog started howling in the distance. “Don’t get any ideas of running off,” Adam warned. After a few seconds Coal laid his head down between his front paws and went back to sleep.

Reflecting on how his day had gone and how busy they’d been at the store, Adam was glad to be off his feet and relaxing at home. He was thankful that Scott Ramsey had come in after school to work a few hours before closing time. He’d ended up hiring the kid part-time, and Scott had turned out to be a good worker, except for the times his new friend showed up.

Adam wasn’t sure who this kid was; he hadn’t seen him around Arthur before. It could be that a new family had moved into the area and Adam just hadn’t met them yet. Anyone new to these parts usually ended up coming into the store at some point.

Adam hadn’t said anything when Scott’s friend showed up the first couple times. And he really wouldn’t have minded if the boy had been there to purchase something, but it soon became apparent that he only wanted to hang out. Adam didn’t take kindly to the way this teenager kept Scott from doing his work. This afternoon, when the kid showed up again, it had been the last straw. Adam hated to do it, but he’d ended up saying something to Scott and his friend. The two boys had gone outside together. After twenty minutes passed, Adam went out to find them. If Scott wanted to get paid, then he had to work. Scott and the other boy, whom Scott had introduced as Jared, were pitching a football back and forth. When Adam told Scott that it wasn’t the time to be fooling around and that he needed to get back to work, Scott said he was sorry and returned to the store. Jared, however, stood with a smirk on his face. A few seconds later, he finally stalked off, mumbling something under his breath.

Adam wondered if he should have said something more to the boy before he took off. He was obviously a bad influence on Scott.

Pushing his thoughts aside, Adam resumed his appraisal of the star-studded night. Looking up at the twinkling, sprawling sky, Adam thought of his sister.
Is heaven up there, somewhere?
he pondered.
Is that where Mary and Amos are? Can they see what we’re doing down here? Do they approve of how I’m caring for their girls?

Adam missed his sister and her husband so much. He hated to think that every year he would associate his birthday with their deaths. After all, they’d been coming to help celebrate his thirtieth birthday when the accident happened. Adam was never much on celebrating his birthday, and usually the day would pass like any other. Most people, except his sister and her family, didn’t even know when it was.

If I had never been born, two precious lives would not have been lost, and three little girls wouldn’t be without their mother and father,
Adam thought with regret.

Coal got up and sat directly in front of Adam. Whimpering, the dog laid his head in Adam’s lap.

“Somehow, boy, I think you can read my mind.” Adam scratched behind the dog’s silky ears. Wiping away a tear, he looked up at the sky.
Good night, sweet Mary. Pleasant dreams.

Knowing he needed to make sure the girls had gotten ready for bed, Adam rose from his seat and went into the house.

He was about to head upstairs, when he remembered the letter he’d found in the mailbox this afternoon. Busy getting supper and doing evening chores, he’d forgotten about it. He hoped the letter would perk Amy up a bit.

Adam went upstairs, and seeing that Carrie and Linda were asleep already, he went across the hall to Amy’s room. He knocked on her door, which was slightly ajar, and found her still awake, sitting up in bed.

“I have a letter that came today, and I thought you’d like to hear what it says.” Adam sat on the edge of her bed.

“Who’s it from?”

“Your friend Mandy’s mother.” Adam pulled the letter from his pocket. “Should I read it to you?”

Amy nodded.

“‘Dear Adam: We got your wedding invitation, and if all goes well, we should be able to attend. Mandy is excited to see Amy again, and we look forward to meeting your bride. Sincerely, the Burkholder Family.’”

Adam didn’t know Mandy’s family that well—he’d only met them a few times when he’d gone to Nappanee. But thinking it would be good for Amy to spend some time with her friend, he’d invited Mandy and her folks to attend the wedding.

A huge grin spread over Amy’s face. It was the first time since his sister’s death that Adam had seen her look so happy. He saw it as a sign that she might be on the road to healing.

At least he hoped she was.

O
ver the next few weeks, Cora saw Leah regularly for foot treatments. Her back felt much better, and her feet weren’t nearly as sore, even though she wasn’t getting reflexology specifically for that. The real reason Cora kept returning to Leah’s was because she felt so comfortable with her. Leah had become the friend Cora needed so badly.

The young Amish woman was real, not phony, like some of Cora’s so-called friends in Chicago. Leah was someone she could count on and even confide in. A few of the nurses she’d worked with at the hospital had been genuine, but none of them had as caring an attitude as Leah’s. Whenever Cora talked about her problems with Jared, Leah offered a listening ear and promised to pray for Cora. Despite the fact that Cora didn’t put much stock in prayer these days, it was comforting to know that someone cared enough to petition God on her behalf.

Cora had grown up with Bible knowledge, but she’d never really taken it to heart. As far as Cora knew, none of her siblings had ever strayed from their faith. Not like Cora, who had always been a bit of a rebel. Cora’s father used to accuse her of being selfish and self-centered, which wasn’t pleasing to God.

“Maybe Dad was right,” Cora murmured as she pulled her car up to Leah’s house. “Maybe that’s why God doesn’t answer my prayers—because my selfish ambitions displease Him so much.”

Tears welled in Cora’s eyes, and she looked in the rearview mirror to make sure none had fallen onto her cheeks. She would rather not go in to see Leah in a tearful state; she’d already shed more tears than she should have while telling Leah her woes.

Cora remained in her car a few more minutes, watching the sun’s gradual descent in the west. The sunset’s glow cast a beautiful radiance on the few leaves still clinging to the trees in the Masts’ front yard. Some of the maples still had their autumn color, glowing with the brilliance of a blazing fire. The reflection it cast on all that it touched was breathtaking. Cora rolled down the car window for a better look, enjoying the sight. Inhaling, she could actually smell autumn in the air—that damp, earthy scent. Breathing deeply, she inhaled its fragrance.

A slight breeze picked up, creating a whirlwind of leaves, lifting them into the air, and just that quickly, floating them slowly back down to the grass. Some ended up wedged into the corners by the house, joining others that had already accumulated there. As Cora continued to watch, she couldn’t help comparing the leaves to herself. Like the leaves clinging to the tree branches, Cora sometimes felt as if she was just barely hanging on. Her life had been a whirlwind, with so many highs and lows. Just when everything seemed normal and calm, something happened to ruin it all.

Recently, though, Cora had begun to feel as if she was drifting toward some kind of normalcy in her life, something she yearned for in the worst way. Cora felt more confident every day that she’d made the right decision to move to Arthur. She had a good job and was making a few friends. Even if Jared hadn’t wanted this move, something about this area made her feel that she belonged here—in a place she could call home.