The Ghost and the Darkness Volume 1 (The Fallocaust Series Book 2) (16 page)

Being armed made me feel better, but in the shower I had had time to calm down my suspicions and try and make sense of this situation. If we were indeed prisoners of Elish there would be a hell of a lot more precautions being taken and he certainly wouldn’t have left his beloved animal where I could get to him. That kid had hung off of his arm when they had visited Aras.

Though who I was still ruled with an iron fist inside of me. It took a lot of mental energy to silence the alarm bells telling me to take Killian and run. In my head I wanted to get as far away from this lions’ den as I could, no matter what waited for us in the greywastes. Take our chances with the rocks and radanimals instead of seemingly waiting for my captors to come.

If I didn’t have Killian I would have done that, but... I had him to watch out for.

I would hear Elish out... and base my decision on that meeting. He wasn’t my captor, and I wasn’t his prisoner. I was a greywaster, not a chimera pet or a sengil. I could leave if I wanted to and he couldn’t stop me.

I opened the door, fully clothed and walked into the living room and kitchen.

Killian was waiting for me at the end of the hallway; I saw two needles in his hand. I walked with him and he took me to what I guessed was his bedroom downstairs, the one I had woken up in.

I lay down on the bed and felt him prep my arm; I took a deep relieved breath as I felt the pinch of the needle. I hated how much I was liking doing drugs this way; I had never cared for needles before.

The rush was unbelievable; I let out a small groan and closed my eyes. I wondered why this was hitting me so nicely then I remembered I hadn’t done drugs in over a week.

When Killian was injected I felt him lay beside me. I put my arms around him and held the boy close to my chest.

“I missed you so much,” Killian whispered. I heard him sniff and I braced myself for the tears. “I’m not scared here, Elish has been so kind to me, and Jade and Perish too. I don’t know what’s going on but it could be so much worse.”

I inhaled the scent of his hair; he was slowly starting to smell familiar. That mixed in with the drugs almost had me feeling like I was home.

I would go back there eventually and take what is mine. I’m Greyson’s son, I own Aras and if I have to execute every single fucking person in there I’ll get it back. I would love nothing more than to kill all of them and start fresh. Either way, they wouldn’t get away with how they treated Killian and Reno. They were all fucking cowards. I would burn them all.

It was mine to take. Even if it took years, I would take back my town.

“Ouch... babe.” Killian flinched. I realized I was gripping him rather hard. I released my hands. I felt him shift up, before my cheek warmed under his breath. “I’m so happy you’re awake, I felt lost without you.”

I closed my eyes, enjoying the warmth of the heroin seep into every nook and cranny of my mind. Slowly unfolding the wrinkles in my brain one by one making it into a puddle of soup. In the embrace of the drugs I felt a small flame of confidence that perhaps we weren’t as screwed as I thought. If I had Elish in my corner maybe he would just stick us in a cabin in the mountains, or we could stay here. I wouldn’t mind that. I might go a bit psychotic if it was just Killian and I but... well, maybe we could adopt a pet. Killian could be that guy’s friend.

No, I hated that idea... I didn’t want to live in peace now, not until I could kill Silas and his creatures, not until I got Aras back. Then... then we could just go home.

My heart stirred... but if it meant Killian and I would be safe forever... isn’t that what my dads wanted? For me to be happy and safe? But so much has changed now. From the hollowness in my gut, I think inside I changed. Could I toss out my need for revenge for a simple life with him?

Who was I kidding...? I suppressed a dry laugh. Elish hadn’t rescued us to give us a better life. That blond douchebag had plans for me; one look at that imperious face told me that if you shook that arm half a dozen aces would fall out.

Should I be a sitting duck waiting to see if a dog would emerge to retrieve me... or do I take the kid and run?

Run where?

Winter is here, the fucking blond boy doesn’t even have a proper jacket; he’ll freeze to death the first night.

My grip tightened, I swore in my head. I hated feeling trapped and helpless. Elish was a chimera; he was Silas’s right hand man. How did I know this wasn’t another fucking game?

I really should’ve talked to Elish that night. I was an idiot for blowing smoke in his face. In that moment Greyson had just given me some disturbing news and I was feeling well... a lot of self-hatred and the arrogance got to my head. I should’ve fucking talked to him; he might’ve given some sort of sign that he was going to be on my side.

Well, there was no time to feel sorry for myself. That angsty fuck died when the deacon ripped out his throat. I was the Reaper. I am amongst the elite and I had to act like it now. My top priority was making sure Killian was safe. At all costs. My fate wasn’t a concern of mine; he was my only priority.

So we would stay here. I squeezed Killian and kissed his ear. Until his dying day I’d protect him. I would make another Fallocaust and kill everyone all over again if it meant he was safe.

“I’ll never let them hurt you,” I whispered to him. “You need to promise me, if they try and take me, you’ll run. Shoot anyone who tries to take you. Promise me and mean it.”

Killian shifted, I saw his eyes were red and swollen. They gazed at me. “I won’t let them take you.”

I brushed a lock of golden hair from his eyes. “Idiot, I’m immortal... I’ll find you. They won’t be able to keep me caged and they won’t be able to kill me. I’ll spend every waking moment trying to get back to you. We wouldn’t be apart for long.”

I felt him shudder underneath my touch. I rubbed his back. “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you. You know I will.”

Those words stung my lips. I meant them. With every ounce of strength inside of me I meant them. But I knew the cards; I saw the hand I was holding. Elish had us right now, I was under his control and I didn’t like it. Every bit of this situation made me feel like I was walking between razor blades. I had to tread carefully and be careful. I couldn’t blow up at Elish; I needed to be patient. I had to gather information and see what was happening.

Everything was weaving together in a way that made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want to be patient... I didn’t want to wait it out. I felt like a tiger pacing his cage. How could I sit like I was on a fucking vacation? It was in my blood to rush in and get things resolved, do what had to be done. If I had been patient rescuing Killian he would have been resting on some waster’s shelf right now.

What would you do, Greyson...?
I pushed the rising feelings of despair back into the hollow void. Greyson would’ve done what he had to do to keep his family safe. Like he had kept me safe all those years. He had put aside his dreams for me for my happiness. I didn’t have a son, but I had a boyfriend.

Fuck... all those things Greyson and Leo had sacrificed for me, to keep me safe.
I shut my eyes tighter and dared even a single neuron to make me feel something. I was a machine, I am the Reaper...
shit, shit, shit,
I can’t deal with those two right now. I can’t deal with what happened in Aras, I can’t...

Why did I treat those two so badly the last few months I had them?

I wanted more heroin... but I didn’t want to move. Instead I tried to shut down my mind, and enjoy the fleeting moments of comfort.

If Elish took me, if he offered Killian’s safety I would take it. I meant what I had said to Killian, I would never stop trying to come back to him, and I would... I was smarter than Asher. He might think he was king but he had competition now. If I was him, if I was his copy, it meant I was as good as him and more. If he wanted to match wits with me and try and enslave me in Skyfall he had another thing coming.

I felt myself slip into zombieland. Every time I surfaced from my dream world I smelled him and felt myself get lulled back into a half-sleep. I think the both of us needed this, especially him. He liked the contact and all that stuff. I was happy just having him near me.

In my lucid dreams I was killing Silas, no... he was Asher at this moment, his hair was still auburn. It was Asher in his greywaster clothes, the same clothes he wore when we got away from those ravers that night.

The night air was so prominent I could feel the cool taste on my tongue. So static and alive, buzzing with activity. The gut piercing screams, the rush of being knocked off the bike and into the inky darkness around you. The smell of the dirt, the taste of blood...

I shook my head and dashed the memory from my mind. We were never in any danger really; we would both have come back. Greyson and Leo would’ve hid my corpse until I recovered and Silas would eventually have recovered in whatever mess of tendon and bone the ravers left behind.

Though they would have had to tell Killian, and perhaps the residents who saw it happen, or smuggle me out.

I wonder how many times I had died.

My brow furrowed. I pulled away and looked at Killian, who was nodding off from his own hit of heroin. “Rubber fucking bullets... what an asshole.”

The boy blinked at me and gave me a strange look; I just shook my head and sighed. How could I have been that stupid to believe that lie? Like the legionary carried around rubber bullet guns.

They had probably had a fine time bludgeoning me in the head to make it seem believable.

I kissed Killian’s forehead, before drawing him close to me. I would hold him all night tonight, and I wouldn’t push him away, even after he fell asleep.

Tomorrow was going to be a long day, this I knew.

The next morning I was up before Killian, which allowed me to scout out this strange base I was in. It seemed to be an apartment carved right out of the side of a mountain. The view was incredible, I could see for miles though all there was to see was the grey terrain and the black trees. Still though, it was amazing to be up this high, and safe too.

I had found the coffee pot and had put some on for everyone; I even managed to heat up food in the microwave, which was a plus. I’d leave the real cooking for the slavepet though. I just needed something in my stomach.

I was chewing on a piece of hard bread I had found, trying to get the remote control to work when I saw the deacdog perk up from his bed and look behind him.

I looked behind me too, and saw someone I never thought I would see again.

“You’re a fugitive too, eh?”

Perish froze in place, he was still dressed in his underclothes and had an expression like he hadn’t expected me to be here.

He took one look at me and turned around, but I think in the moment he changed his mind and turned right back around.

“I’m sorry,” the scientist stammered.

I stared at him, wondering what he had to be sorry about. I liked that he was scared though, he
should
be submitting to me.

“What are you sorry for?” I swallowed down the bread and ripped myself off another piece.

Perish fidgeted, his eyes shifting from one direction to another. “I decided to tell you, so Killian didn’t get the chance. He was asleep, and he was having a night terror... I tried to help him but I ended up kissing him. Killian screamed and got very very mad and barricaded himself. It’s my fault, I’m sorry. I just so much missed him but... it won’t ever happen again.”

A cold frost swallowed up the casual air that the morning brought. I listened to the scientist’s heart as it sped up like a revving motor, terrified at what I was going to do next.

I got up, and as I did he flinched. I walked into the kitchen.

“I don’t know what came over me, I think... I think seeing him so scared. I just wanted...”

Perish was silent as he saw me grab a long knife from the knife block. When I turned around, I was almost surprised to see him still standing. He hadn’t run like his ass was on fire yet.

“I’m... I’m –”

I grabbed Perish by the collar of his shirt and yanked him to my face.

“What makes you think you’re allowed to touch my boyfriend now? My boyfriend, not yours, he was never yours.” I lowered my voice, feeling his pulse jump like I had just injected meth into his heart.

His eyes continued to veer away from mine, but every time they did I jerked my hand and shook his chin, making him look at me.

“Nothing, it was... a personality fault. I understand he was never mine... but I miss him,” Perish stammered.

I lowered the knife, and pressed the tip of the blade across the crotch of his cloth pants. He inhaled a sharp breath as I put a fair amount of pressure against it.

“If I ever catch you, or I think you are a danger to him... do you know what I will do to you? I will cut off your cock and balls and make you eat them. Then I will bandage you, sew you, and make you heal and I will never fucking let you die again. Understand that, Dr. Perish?” I said lowly, digging the blade in further until I felt it pierce the skin.

The scientist nodded vigorously, pressing myself against the back of the couch with every dig of the knife. “Y-yes... I am... very scared of you, Reaver. I won’t piss you off, I’m not stupid.”