The Garner Files: A Memoir (39 page)

Space Geezers
. When we shot it Clint was seventy-two, Donald was sixty-six, Tommy Lee was fifty-three, and I was seventy-two.

I’ve known Clint for about a thousand years. He was in a
Maverick
episode in 1959. We were playing golf one day and I said, “We should work together more often than every forty years,” and about a year later he hired me for
Space Cowboys
.

Clint makes it look easy and gives you a great environment to work in. But he lied to me: That scene where we all show our butts— Clint told me the other guys were going to do it, so I said I would, too. But he’d told Tommy and Donald that I agreed to do it. He conned us all into dropping our trousers.

Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood
½ (Warner Bros., 2002) C-117 min. D: Callie Khouri. Sandra Bullock, Ellen Burstyn, Maggie
Smith, Shirley Knight, Ashley Judd, Fionnula Flanagan. Angus Macfadyen.

All those wonderful women! I got to play Sandra Bullock’s father and Ellen Burstyn’s husband. It’s a strange marriage . . . but aren’t they all?

The Notebook
(New Line, 2004) C-123 min. D: Nick Cassavetes. Gena Rowlands, Ryan Gosling, Rachel McAdams, Sam Shepard, Joan Allen.

A magnificent love story based on the Nicholas Sparks bestseller. (See
pages 207
–9.)

The Ultimate Gift
(Fox Faith, 2007) C-117 min. D: Michael O. Sajbel. Drew Fuller, Ali Hillis, Bill Cobbs, Brian Dennehy, Lee Merriwether.

I play a dead man. Not typecasting, I hope.

SERIES

Maverick
(1957–61)

The training ground where I learned my craft. (See
chapter 3
.)

Nichols
(1971–72)

Nichols is a drifter who returns to his Arizona hometown in 1914 and reluctantly becomes its sheriff. (See
pages 189
–92.)

The Rockford Files
(1974–80)

Still in syndication and streaming on the Internet, whatever that is. (See
chapter 7
.)

Bret Maverick
(1981–82)

Twenty years after the original
Maverick
series, Bret wants to settle down, so he rides into Sweetwater, where he wins $50,000 and the deed
to a saloon in a poker game. But somebody swipes the fifty grand and the saloon turns out to be a losing proposition. Unfortunately, so did
Bret Maverick.

Man of the People
(1991)

The series, in which I play a scam artist appointed to my late wife’s city council seat, was short-lived and rightly so.

Chicago Hope
(1994)

A David E. Kelley production with good scripts and good actors. I enjoyed the few episodes I did as a ruthless head of an HMO who comes in and cuts the budget.

God, the Devil and Bob
(2000)

A controversial animated show in which I provide the voice of God. It’s a shame we went out of business so soon, because I
loved
playing God.

First Monday
(2002)

I played a
conservative
US Supreme Court justice (
act
-ing!). Loved working with Charles Durning.

8 Simple Rules
(2003–05)

I joined the cast for a guest shot after John Ritter’s untimely death and stayed until the series ended. Everyone made it very nice for me. The writing was good, and I enjoyed working with Katey Sagal, David Spade, and Suzanne Pleshette.

I never used to like working with children. For a long time I thought they were unpredictable and, well, unprofessional. But Amy Davidson, Kaley Cuoco, and Martin Spanjers were terrific. Who cares if they steal a scene? If any actor can steal a scene from me, they’re welcome to it.

MINISERIES

Space
(1985)

A big-bucks production based on James Michener’s best-selling book. I’m not nuts about the miniseries format: you work one day, then you’re off for three weeks. I like to work every day and immerse myself in a role. But James Michener was on the set a lot and that was a treat.

Larry McMurtry’s Streets of Laredo
(1995)

The sequel to
Lonesome Dove.
I play aging bounty hunter Woodrow Call chasing a bandit who’s been robbing the railroad. I’d been slated to do the Robert Duvall part in the original, but I got sick. Bobby was so good, I didn’t really mind losing the part.

Great cast: Sissy Spacek, Sam Shepard, Sonia Braga, Randy Quaid, Ned Beatty, George Carlin, Wes Studi, Charles Martin Smith.

Mark Twain’s Roughing It
(2001)

Mark Twain was one of our greatest writers, of course, and I admire him a lot, but it was a little scary to play him. I don’t think I did a very good job, but I enjoyed the experience, especially working with Charles Martin Smith, who did a fine job of directing.

TELEVISION MOVIES

The Rockford Files
(1974)

The first of a series of made-for-television
Rockford
movies, as they were called back then.

The New Maverick
(1978)

Charles Frank in a
Maverick
revival attempt that didn’t quite make it.

Bret Maverick
(1981)

We had to stop production for two months after I got thrown off a mechanical horse and broke a bunch of ribs.

The Long Summer of George Adams
(1982)

Stuart Margolin directed and composed the music for this delightful film about a railroad worker in the 1950s whose job has been made obsolete by technology. I treasured the experience of working with Stuart again, and I always loved Joan Hackett.

Heartsounds
(1984)

Based on the autobiographical book by Martha Weinman Lear about her husband’s struggle with heart disease. Norman Lear produced—Hal Lear was his cousin—and Glenn Jordan directed. Mary Tyler Moore and I had never met before, but it was a joy to work with her. She had instigated the project, and she really threw herself into the part of Martha Weinman Lear.

The cast members were all staying at the same hotel in Toronto and there was a fire in the middle of the night, so I banged on Mary’s door and shouted to wake her up. We walked down eighteen flights together with her insisting all the way that I probably saved her life. I didn’t think it was such a big deal. Turned out the fire wasn’t serious—probably somebody cooking cucumbers with Sterno.

I think they may have begun to think about me differently after
Heartsounds
. At least that’s what I hoped. I wanted them to see that I could do something other than a cocky detective.

The Glitter Dome
(1984)

I play a senator who goes from age thirty-five to sixty-five. Shooting it, on any given day, I didn’t know how old I was. I was forty-five in the morning, sixty in the afternoon.

Promise
(1985)

Our first Cherokee production for Hallmark and my first collaboration with Jimmy Woods. (See
pages 192
–95.)

My Name Is Bill W.
(1989)

The founding of Alcoholics Anonymous, through the eyes of Bill Wilson and Bob Smith. (See
pages 195
–201.)

Decoration Day
(1990)

An African American World War II vet (Bill Cobbs) turns down the Medal of Honor to protest discrimination in the military. I play a retired judge who tries to get the medal for him decades later. My wife had died, I’d withdrawn from life, and I was content to sit in a boat with my dog. (“She knows the English language but can’t speak a word of it.”) Most of the characters I play are people who try to do the right thing. In this case, he was trying to get other people (the government) to do the right thing.

I supplied my own wardrobe. I got an Indiana Jones hat out of my closet—Stu Margolin had given it to me—and cut the brim down a little bit. The pants and the fishing vest are mine, too. I think it’s always better if you can wear your own things.

Barbarians at the Gate
(1993)

All about the takeover mania of the 1980s and ’90s. The sheer gall of those guys, ripping companies apart, saddling them with all that debt, putting all those people out of jobs. I hadn’t read the book, because high finance and rotten people don’t interest me. But I loved Larry Gelbart’s script. Larry was a great satiric writer. He was funny and, boy, he had a
knife
! But he was a pussycat of a man.

People said I made Ross Johnson into a nice guy, but I didn’t deviate from the script. He was no hero, but he wasn’t exactly a villain, either. I think he was just a salesman who got in over his head. I haven’t done any out-and-out villains; they don’t hire me for that because
of the persona I’ve had for forty-five years. I think they hire me to make a bad guy a little more presentable, but I never play an outand-out killer.

It was going to be a feature, but Columbia dropped it from the schedule as part of an austerity program. The producer, Ray Stark, went to cable and it was great fun. Later they put it on Fox and ruined it. They wanted me to loop dialogue for the broadcast version, but I refused. I hate the way that looks—your lips are doing one thing and your voice is doing another. I said, “Go get somebody else,” and they did, some guy in town who sounded like me.

Breathing Lessons
(1994)

Joanne Woodward and I play an old married couple who have nothing in common except their love for each other. (See
pages 206
–7.)

Rockford Files: I Still Love L.A.
(1994)

The theme song was slower and so was I. Practically everybody from the original series came back to do the TV movies, though we’d lost “Pidge”—Noah Beery Jr.—in the interim. We did eight
Rockford
movies in all:

Rockford Files: A Blessing in Disguise
(1995)

Rockford Files: If the Frame Fits
(1996)

Rockford Files: Godfather Knows Best
(1996)

Rockford Files: Friends and Foul Play
(1996)

Rockford Files: Punishment and Crime
(1996)

Rockford Files: Murder and Misdemeanors
(1997)

Rockford Files: If It Bleeds . . . It Leads
(1999)

Dead Silence
(1997)

I’m an FBI negotiator trying to secure the release of a busload of deaf kids. Marlee Matlin and Lolita Davidovich starred.

Legalese
(1998)

A bit convoluted, but I’m a slick defense lawyer defending Gina Gershon’s character after she shoots her brother-in-law. I think. I loved working with Glenn Jordan again.

One Special Night
(1999)

My third time out with Julie Andrews and it
was
a charm. We shot it in Montreal thirty-six years after our first collaboration,
The
Americanization of Emily,
but who’s counting?

We’ve both lost our spouses and take refuge in a cabin on a stormy winter’s night and . . . guess what happens?

In one scene, I had to hold a cigar and Julie noticed that my hands were shaking. “What’s the matter?” she said.

“I’m nervous!”