The Future King’s Love-Child (5 page)

‘How are you managing for money now?’ Sebastian asked.

A glitter of pride flashed in her gaze as it met his. ‘I’m fine. I have what I need for…for myself.’

Sebastian wondered if she was telling the truth. There was something about her that suggested she was more than a little uncomfortable in his presence. She never used to shift her gaze and gnaw at her bottom lip in that restive manner. But then perhaps her time in prison had made her wary of people. It was understandable considering what he had heard about life in prison. He didn’t like to think about what she must have suffered. There was no secret about the violence and rivalry behind bars, even in women’s prisons. Drug use was rife, vicious hierarchies existed and corruption amongst guards was commonplace. No wonder she was edgy and unable to relax even for a moment.

She looked at her watch and got to her feet. ‘I have to go,’ she said. ‘My lunch hour is almost up.’

He intercepted her before she had even picked up her purse off the floor. ‘No, Cassie,’ he said, placing one of his hands over her forearm. ‘I have not finished talking to you yet.’

Cassie looked down at his tanned fingers lying across her bare arm and gave an involuntary shiver. Those hands had taught her so much about passion. They had explored every contour of her body. And for close to six years she had dreamt of how it would feel to have them touch her again. The way he had touched and kissed her last night
had made her all the more vulnerable to him. She didn’t have the courage to look at his face, for she was sure he would see the longing there in her eyes. She ached with it; it was like a taut thread in her body, tightening unbearably every time she was near him, pulling her inexorably closer to him.

‘Look at me, Cassie,’ he said into the thrumming silence.

She swallowed and slowly brought her eyes to his. ‘I really have to go, Sebastian,’ she said. ‘Some of the younger children have naps after lunch and I always read to them. They will become agitated if I’m not there.’ She took a tiny swallow and added, ‘I don’t like letting them down.’

‘I told my secretary to inform the director you would not be back until three at the latest.’

She narrowed her eyes at him. ‘
You did what?
’

His fingers moved down her arm to encircle her wrist, bringing her closer to his hard, tall frame. ‘I cleared my diary so we could have this time together.’

‘You had no right to interfere like that!’ Cassie said, tugging at his hold to no avail. She felt herself climb yet another unstable rung on the ladder of her panic. She could see her little son’s worried face at the window, waiting for her. She could hear the nervous staccato of his speech as
he asked Sophie or Kara where his mummy was. She could even see the puddle on the floor and his wet pants, which would distress Sam even though he couldn’t help it during times of acute stress.

‘Why all the fuss?’ Sebastian asked, still holding her firmly. ‘Surely you have earned a couple of hours off?’

Cassie tried to prise off his fingers but he placed his other hand over hers, a move she had no hope of counteracting. She gulped in a ragged breath as she brought her eyes to his. His dark eyes became even darker as they centred on her mouth, the touch of his fingers going from firm and restraining to gentle and tantalisingly sensual. The drugging movement of his thumb on the underside of her wrist caused the slow but inexorable melt of her bones and what was left of her resistance. The blood in her veins became hectic under the rapid-fire beat of her heart. Her stomach felt hollow, her legs felt weak and her breathing became shallow and uneven as his warm breath skated over the surface of her lips as his head came down…

The first brushlike stroke of his mouth on hers was tentative, even a little hesitant, a bit like a goose feather, so soft she wondered if she had imagined it. The second was firmer, with a hint of growing urgency, but the third tasted of desire hot and strong, rocking Cassie to the core. She
opened her mouth to the searching glide of his tongue, her insides turning to jelly when that deliciously erotic contact was made. The kiss became more urgent, more passionate, more out of control and she was swept away with it. It felt so wonderful to be held in his arms again, to have his hands at her waist, holding her trembling body against the heat and strength of his. He was hard and getting harder as every second passed, the hollow ache in her body echoing the pounding of his blood against her.

His hands moved from her waist to the small of her back, bringing her closer to his surging heat. Cassie felt her body moisten and her stomach did another dip and dive at the thought of how it had felt with him deep inside her in the past, the rocking motion of their bodies bringing them to the ultimate moment in human pleasure. It was like a craving he had started within her and no one else could ever satisfy it but him. The thought of sharing her body with anyone else was abhorrent to her and had been from the first time she had experienced pleasure in his arms. She had resigned herself to a lifetime of celibacy, never dreaming that one day he would come back into her life and want her again.

He lifted his mouth off hers, his eyes blazing as they locked on hers. ‘I want you and I intend
to have you again even if it is only for one night. Think about it, Cassie. One night to remember for the rest of our lives.’

‘This can’t happen, Sebastian,’ she whispered hoarsely even as she felt her body sway towards him. ‘You know it can’t. We were worlds apart before. Now we live in different universes.’

He traced the outline of her cupid’s bow with the tip of his index finger. ‘My head is telling me that but not the rest of me. Why do you do this to me, Cassie? Have you cast a spell on me?’

‘Please don’t make this any harder than it already is,’ she pleaded with him. ‘Let me go, Sebastian, before we do something we will not just remember, but quite possibly regret for the rest of our lives.’

He cupped her face in his hands, locking her gaze with his. ‘No one needs to know about it but us.’

Cassie’s heart gave another head-spinning lurch. ‘You’re really serious about this…’

His thumbs began caressing the twin curves of her cheeks, his eyes so dark she couldn’t see his pupils. ‘I want you, Caz. I still want you. As soon as I saw you at the gala last night I knew I would not rest until I had you again. After we kissed…well, that confirmed to me that you felt the same.’

‘Sebastian…’ She tried to inject some implacability
to her tone but she wasn’t sure she quite pulled it off. ‘There are lots of things in life people want but it doesn’t mean they can have them. This will never work between us. You’re the Prince Regent of Aristo and I am…well, you know what I am…everyone knows what I am…’

‘What does it matter what you are or what you have done?’ he asked. ‘This is about here and now, not the future. I cannot offer you marriage, you know that, and, if what you said in the past is true, you don’t want me to. I am offering you an affair to satisfy our needs, that is all.’

Cassie dipped out of his hold and put some distance between them. ‘This is crazy, Sebastian.’ She rubbed at her upper arms as if warding off a chill. ‘You kept our relationship a secret last time but only just. The threat of exposure was constant. How much worse will it be now? Everyone watches your every move. The paparazzi are like ants at a picnic. The guards you surround yourself with could so easily be bribed for a price on your comings and goings. You are no longer in a position to control your public life, let alone your private one.’

‘I have ways and means to keep some aspects of my life absolutely private,’ he countered. ‘I have chosen my personal staff very carefully. They would not betray me. I am absolutely sure of it.’

‘This…this thing between us is just about sex,’ she said in rising frustration. ‘Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?’

He gave her an ironic look. ‘Feelings, Cassie?’ he said. ‘What is this? What happened to the I-just-want-to-have-fun-without-strings Cassie Kyriakis of the past, hmm?’

She never existed in the first place
, Cassie said to herself and dearly wished she could say it out loud. She had constructed a fantasy to keep people from seeing the real Cassie. Who would want the real deal? Even her father, her only living relative, had not been able to look at her without hatred and disgust glittering in his eyes.

‘I want different things now,’ she said, trying to control the slight wobble in her voice. ‘I have spent a long time thinking about where I went wrong. I don’t want to make the same mistakes this time around.’

A glint of resentment lit his gaze as it pinned hers. ‘So you consider your involvement with me back then as a mistake?’

Cassie thought of her little son.
Their
little son. How could she regret the one good thing, the
only
good thing that had come out of their short-lived and secret relationship? Sam was everything to her. He was her saviour, her reason for living. She could never, not in a million years, regret anything
to do with how he was conceived. ‘No…’ she said at the end of an expelled breath. ‘I went into our relationship with my eyes wide open.’

‘Not to mention your legs.’

She flinched as if he had struck her. ‘I beg your pardon?’

‘Come on, Cassie,’ he said with a derisive look. ‘You were no blushing virgin when you leapt into my bed.’

She ground her teeth as she fought to contain her temper. ‘That’s a rather sexist thing to say. You had plenty of experience yourself, if I remember correctly.’

‘But still not enough for you,’ he said with a cutting edge to his tone. ‘You had God knows how many other men lining up to pleasure you. You gave me a list of names, remember?’

Each and every lie she had ever told seemed determined to backfire on her one way or the other. The only thing she could do was to paper over her previous lies with more lies and hope to God he never discovered the truth. ‘I am not particularly proud of my behaviour back then,’ she said stiffly, ‘but you never gave me any indication you were developing more serious feelings for me. I thought we wanted the same things—fun without strings.’

‘It started that way, yes, but you had a rather
bewitching way about you, Cassie, that made me want more,’ he said. ‘I was going to tell you but you got in first with your announcement that you wanted out.’

Cassie stared at him, her heart sinking at the thought of what she had inadvertently thrown away. Why hadn’t he given her some clue earlier? She had never for a moment suspected he was falling for her. He had been very passionate and attentive, yes, but as for showing any sign of developing stronger feelings… Oh, dear God! What cruel twist of fate had led them to this torturous impasse?

The silence stretched and stretched to the point of agony.

‘Aren’t you going to ask me, Cassie?’ Sebastian said.

She shook herself out of her frozen state. ‘Ask you w-what?’

His top lip curled sardonically. ‘The question women always ask in situations such as this.’

Cassie pressed her lips together as she struggled with her see-sawing emotions. ‘OK, then…’ She took an unsteady breath and asked him even though she knew it would not help her to know, but rather would only make it a thousand times worse. ‘Do you still have feelings for me?’

He stood looking at her for a long time before
answering. Cassie wondered if he was still making up his mind. But in the end she wasn’t all that surprised by his answer—heart-wrenchingly disappointed, yes, but not a bit surprised.

‘I do not love you,’ he said. ‘Do not mistake physical desire for more noble feelings. There is nothing noble or indeed proper about what I feel for you now, Cassie. I want an affair with you to get you out of my system before I take up the reins of duty. I will be expected to marry and to marry well. I believe someone has already been earmarked as a potential bride.’

Cassie felt as if he had plunged a serrated fishing knife deep into her chest. She wanted to bend over double to counteract the pain but only pride kept her upright and rigid. ‘Oh, really?’ she said in a disinterested tone. ‘That certainly takes the legwork out for you, doesn’t it? Just think—no hours wasted flirting, no money thrown away on flowers and meals at exclusive restaurants. Lucky you.’

His eyes were dark slits of brooding anger. ‘This is not over, Cassie,’ he said. ‘Not by a long shot. I would not have brought you here if I did not believe you want the same thing as I do. You betrayed it to me last night when you returned my kiss.’

‘Yes, well, that’s only because I haven’t been
kissed for a long…’ Cassie stopped and bit her lip, suddenly realising she had just tripped over one of her very own lies…

S
EBASTIAN
came across to where she was standing, and, taking her chin between his thumb and index finger, lifted her face to meet his gaze. ‘So there is no current man in your life,’ he mused. ‘What other lies have you told me, hmm?’

Cassie felt her heart kicking erratically behind her chest wall. Her mouth dried up, her throat locked tight and her breathing came to a shuddering halt. ‘Just that one…’ she said, mentally calculating how many falsehoods she had told him within the space of less than twenty-four hours.

‘I wonder what other little secrets you are keeping,’ he said, still holding her gaze with the piercing scrutiny of his. ‘Like where you live, for instance.’

Cassie swallowed. ‘Where I live is no secret.’

‘If so, then why was it when Stefanos dropped you at your house last night you failed to enter it
but slipped out of sight up a lane before he could follow you?’

‘Um…I…’

He smiled at her knowingly. ‘Are you frightened Aristo’s future king might call around for a spontaneous visit, hmm?’

You bet I am
, Cassie thought in stomach-lurching dread. ‘I’m sure you are far too busy to make house calls to commoners, much less ex-criminals,’ she said, her tongue darting out to moisten her bone-dry lips. ‘Besides, you wouldn’t dream of drawing press attention to yourself in such a way.’

His thumb began stroking the underside of her chin, back and forth in a movement that was as potent as a mind-altering drug. ‘I am tempted to risk it,’ he said, looking at her mouth. ‘For you,
agape mou
, I think I would be tempted to risk a great deal.’

Cassie felt another shock wave of reaction roll through her. ‘You don’t mean that…’ she said. ‘You hate me for…for betraying you. Why would you risk your reputation and your credibility for someone like me?’

He picked up a strand of her hair and tucked it behind her ear. ‘Why indeed?’

‘Sebastian…’ she said raggedly as she put a hand on his chest to hold him back.

His much larger and broader hand covered hers, almost swallowing it whole. ‘One night, Caz,’ he said in a husky voice. ‘Just give me one night.’

Cassie scrunched her eyes tightly shut to ward off the overwhelming temptation of being in his arms again. ‘Sebastian…’
I want to, oh, how I want to!
She was so dangerously close to confessing. How could he not see it? The temptation he was dangling in front of her was overwhelming. To have one night with him, one night to keep her going for the rest of her life would be a glimpse of heaven.

‘Look at me, Cassie,’ he said softly but no less commandingly.

She slowly opened her eyes. His were impossibly dark and surprisingly soft; as if somewhere deep inside there was a part of him that had not yet exchanged his love for her for hate. Would one night reawaken everything he had felt for her in the past? Or would it do as he hoped and expunge her from his system once and for all?

‘You’re asking too much,’ she said in a scratchy whisper. ‘Way, way too much.’

‘I want to feel it again, Cassie,’ he said, running his hands down her bare arms to encircle her wrists. ‘Remember what it was like between us?’

Cassie remembered too well, that was half the trouble. Hardly a day went by when she didn’t think of the explosive magic she had felt in his
arms. She had not known her body could respond so feverishly and so uninhibitedly until he had made her his. Her one brief foray into physical intimacy with another lover when she was seventeen had nowhere near prepared her for the cataclysmic response Sebastian’s touch evoked. Even now with his long fingers curled around the slender bones of her wrists she felt the power and potency of him through the fine layers of her skin. She ached with the memories of his lovemaking, the way he had made her beg for release at times; she had almost screamed at him, tearing at him with her fingers until he had thrust her through the door to physical paradise. Oh, the pleasure she had felt in his arms! Shivers skated down her spine as she recalled just even one erotic moment of being possessed by him.

‘You can’t tell me it was like that for you with other men,’ he continued when she didn’t answer. ‘I have had lovers before and after you, Cassie, and it was never the same. There is amazing chemistry between us. It makes everything else pale in comparison.’

‘You’re chasing a fantasy, Sebastian,’ she said. ‘We’ve both changed. We’re not the same people now.’

‘We might have changed but this is one thing that certainly hasn’t,’ he said, and, swooping
down, covered her mouth with the crushing urgency of his.

Cassie knew she should pull out of his hold. There were a hundred reasons to push him away, but somehow she couldn’t quite do it. The moment his lips met hers she felt the rush of need consume her. Her senses leapt with each stroke and glide of his masterful tongue, reducing her to a quivering wreck within moments. Was there no cure for this madness? she wondered dizzily. Everything about him felt so right and perfect. The pressure of his kiss, the movement of his hands from her wrists to her waist, then to just beneath her breasts, not quite touching but near enough to make them start to tingle and swell in anticipation.

She whimpered as his mouth continued to ruthlessly and passionately plunder hers, the lascivious dart of his tongue sending her crazy with the need to feel him in that secret heart of her that throbbed and ached for his possession. She leaned into his tight embrace, her arms going around his neck, her fingers threading through his thick dark hair as she returned his kiss with an ardour that more than matched his.

‘You still want me,’ Sebastian growled against her mouth, barely lifting his lips high enough to get the words out. ‘I can taste it in every kiss we have shared.’

Cassie shivered as his warm breath fanned her swollen lips and she opened her eyes and looked up at him dazedly. ‘I’ve always wanted you…’

One of his hands cupped her breast, cradling its gentle weight while the pad of his thumb began to roll over her engorged nipple. ‘I swore I would never allow you to reduce me to this again,’ he said, nibbling at the lobe of her ear with knee-wobbling deftness. ‘But I can’t help it. When I am with you I feel like I am going to burst like a trigger-happy teenager.’

Cassie felt the hardened probe of his erection pressing into her belly and felt a wave of desire wash over her, leaving her trembling with the force of it. She reached for him, her fingers skating over the waistband of his trousers before they went lower.

He groaned at the back of his throat as she outlined his rigid form through the fabric of his trousers, his reaction inciting her to roll down his zipper. He sucked in a breath, his hands on her ribcage grasping at her for purchase as she gently peeled his underwear away.

She could smell the erotic musk of his arousal, the skin stretched so tightly over his length her fingers trembled as she stroked him. He was so strong and powerful and yet her caressing touch brought him to life in a way she found totally exhilarating.

He groaned again, the deep, almost primitive sound fanning the flames of her desire for him. ‘You have to stop, Cassie,’ he said between ragged breaths. ‘I can’t take any more.’

Cassie ignored his plea and continued to caress him, but his hands came down on her shoulders and held her aloft. She looked up at him uncertainly. ‘You don’t want me to…?’

His dark eyes glittered with rampant desire. ‘I want you to but not here and not now,’ he said. ‘You will come to me next Thursday. I will make sure we will not be disturbed. You can stay the night.’

She lowered her gaze. ‘I can’t stay the night…’

He brought up her chin with a determined finger. ‘I will send a car for you.’

‘You’re not listening to me, Sebastian. I can’t stay with you.’

‘Why not?’

She bit her lip searching for a plausible excuse. ‘I have to work the next day. I don’t want to compromise my work situation. If I turn up late I could lose my job.’

‘You will not lose your job,’ he said. ‘Besides, I have already requested your presence at the party I am holding for the children on the following Friday at the palace.’

Cassie’s eyes rounded in alarm. ‘The party is on Friday?’ she asked. ‘
Next
Friday?’

‘Yes,’ he said. ‘That was what Stefanos confirmed when he brought in our lunch. I wanted to do it sooner rather than later as with the coronation preparations my diary will not be so easy to juggle in the weeks to come. We are going ahead with it, otherwise it could be weeks or even months before I can see to it.’

Cassie was finding it hard to hold his gaze. She had to fight not to show how deeply disturbed she was by the news of the party. What if one of the staff mentioned to Sebastian she was Sam’s mother? She could hardly tell Sophie and Kara and the others not to mention it, otherwise they might begin to suspect something. She would have to be so vigilant, keeping close to Sam the whole time. That was all she could do.

‘I can’t stay overnight,’ Cassie repeated, chewing at her lip even more desperately. ‘I will have to start work earlier on Friday to prepare the children for the party.’

‘All right,’ he said after a tense pause. ‘I will agree to have you returned to your house after our date.’

Our date
.

Cassie’s mouth twisted at the euphemism. ‘You’ve really changed, Sebastian. You never used to be so cold-bloodedly ruthless.’

‘If you find me a little more ruthless than before you have only yourself to blame,’ he countered.
‘You did a good job on me, Cassandra Kyriakis. Whenever I become involved with a woman I take control at the start and I make sure I still have it at the finish.’

Cassie clenched her hands by her sides, her fingertips digging into her palms almost painfully. ‘I’m not going to be your latest whore,’ she said with a last stand of pride. ‘I’d rather be locked up again for the next twenty years than suffer that fate.’

He had the gall to laugh. ‘Oh, such feisty words, but do you have any idea of how foolish you are being?’

‘It can’t be any more foolish than agreeing to lie on my back for you to paw me whenever you like,’ she shot back.

‘Do you think I want it to be this way?’ he asked as a flicker of anger lit his gaze from behind. ‘I wish I could look at you and feel nothing, but that’s not the way it is.’

‘It’s your pride,’ she said. ‘You want to rewrite the past because I…because…’ she lowered her eyes from him ‘…I wasn’t faithful to you.’

‘It is not my pride,’ he ground out harshly. ‘I want you because I have never wanted anyone else like I want you.’

Cassie swallowed back her anguish at his grudging confession. She felt exactly the same way about him, but the secret of their son yawned
like a deep, unbridgeable canyon between them. If he found out about Sam now Sebastian’s whole life would change irreparably.

All she had to say was:
Five years ago I had
your son
.

Cassie felt close to tears. She could feel them building at the back of her tight throat, their burning presence a stinging reminder of how much she had loved Sebastian, even though he had ignored her one point of contact with him via her letter, even though he had trashed her character all over again by offering her a short clandestine affair so similar to the one he had offered her six years ago.

‘I really need to get going,’ she said, fiddling with her watch.

He stepped closer and traced the pad of his index finger down the slope of her cheek. ‘One week,’ he said, locking gazes with her. ‘Believe me, Cassie, I will not let this rest until I have one night with you.’

Cassie wished she had the strength and will power to say no. Any other person and it would have been so easy. But didn’t she owe it to him? She’d had his son. She might not ever be in a position to inform him of it, but surely she owed him an hour or two of her time so she could one day tell Sam what sort of man his father was without revealing his true identity.

She had been lucky so far. Sam was surrounded by children who had not just one parent, but
no
parents. It hadn’t yet occurred to Sam to ask why he didn’t have a father, but she knew in the years to come he would no doubt do so. She had no idea how she would handle the subject. Lying to her little boy seemed morally wrong, and yet wouldn’t it be equally morally reprehensible to destroy Sebastian’s lifelong goal of ruling his people by informing him he had a love-child?

‘I guess if you want to see me on Thursday it could be arranged…’ she said, feeling another piece of her heart curl up and die.

‘I want to,
agape mou
,’ Sebastian said, and brushed a soft kiss to her mouth. ‘I want to very much.’

A knock sounded at the door and with a rueful expression he put her from him gently and strode over to answer it.

‘Excuse me, Your Royal Highness,’ Stefanos said. ‘I wasn’t sure if you were aware of the time. You have a meeting with the royal council in just less than fifteen minutes.’

‘Thank you, Stefanos,’ Sebastian said. ‘You have timed it well. Dhespinis Kyriakis is just leaving. Could you ensure that she gets back to the orphanage safely?’

‘Yes, indeed, Your Highness.’

Sebastian watched as Cassie picked up her purse and self-consciously straightened her clothes, her cheeks slightly pink and her eyes avoiding his as she brushed past.

‘Until Thursday, Cassie,’ he said so only she could hear it.

She stalled briefly, her fingers tightening on her purse, but then with a small, almost imperceptible nod she continued to move past him and followed the aide down the echoing corridor.

Sebastian puffed out his cheeks and let the breath escape in a long thin stream, his hand raking down his face in an effort to get his senses back into line. The last hour had been pure madness but it had proved one thing if nothing else.

What he had said to Cassie was right.

As stupid and misguided as it was, he was prepared to risk a very great deal to have her back in his arms, even if it was only for one night.

At the meeting a short time later Sebastian sat forwards in his chair, tapping his pen on the desk impatiently, his frown heavy. ‘So there is still no sign of the Stefani diamond?’ he asked his official council.