The Fragrance of Her Name (6 page)

"I understand," Lauryn finished. "It was quite a shock to me as well." She noted the way his shoulders sagged. "Please, sit back down. You need your rest, I'm sure."

He sat, without argument. Lauryn sat next to him and studied him intently. He was far more interesting and attractive, even with his bandaged eyes, than any other man she had ever met. A pang of guilty disloyalty pricked at her heart as she thought of the Captain waiting back home in Franklin…the man she’d thought no other could compare to…until now. Her thoughts of the Captain led her to the reality of the knowledge owned by the man that sat next to her.

"You know then that I…that I…” she found herself stammering awkwardly in a hushed voice.

“
That you see him," he stated without pause.

Lauryn inhaled deeply, afraid to confide her greatest secret to anyone! Let alone a stranger.

"I do," she whispered. It was inconceivable to her. All these years…all these years that the Captain had been wandering in search of Lauralynn…all the years that she had kept her secret about her spirit friend…someone outside the family had known?

"What scent does he carry?" the man at her side asked. It seemed a very odd question. In fact, it was so incredibly odd that it threw Lauryn’s thoughts into a jumble.

"Scent?" she asked.

"Yes. When he appears to you. How…how do you first know he's there?"

"He…he appears. I sense him coming…he appears…we talk and…"

"You mean
you
talk," he corrected her.

"No. I mean
we
talk. Together. Converse. As you and I are now.”

What ever was the matter with her? She was telling her deepest secret, details of it, to this stranger! This man whom she’d been kissed by, deliciously kissed by, but whom she had no acquaintance with otherwise. Had she lost her mind completely?

But then Brant Masterson turned his face toward her quickly, as if he wanted to look at her, as if he were, at last, surprised by what she was saying.

"You hear his voice?" He seemed angry and disturbed.

"Of course. He has been with me since I was eight. We're great friends.”

He must think her an utter lunatic! There she sat calmly confessing relationships with ghosts. And yet, he looked away again, unsurprised, his lips curled downward in a frown. His silence was irritating. She had offered him a part of her most cherished secret and now he was silent?

"Why?" she asked simply.

He didn't answer for some time. Then raising his face and laying his head back against the car he said, "She can't talk to me."

"What? Who? What do you mean?"

"All she can say to me that I can hear is her name.
Lauralynn. Laura
. It's how I know she is coming to me. It brings with it a familiar perfume…a scent with the only sound of her voice that I hear. It’s…it’s the fragrance of her name."

Lauryn sat dumbfounded! For as many years as she had been friends with the Captain, had this man been haunted, too? Was Brant Masterson telling her that he knew Lauralynn?

“
You…you know Lauralynn?” she asked in an astonished whisper.

He made some sort of a sound similar to the beginning of a chuckle. “Of course! What? Do you think you’re the only person in this mess that sees ghosts?”

“
All your life?” she asked.

“
For as long as I can remember. I was…oh, three or four when I first remember her clearly, though. She’s more of a feeling before that.”

Lauryn put a hand to her forehead to try and sooth the confusion in her mind. Lauralynn could appear to this man, but not to her own husband who was searching so desperately for her? It didn’t make any sense. No sense at all.

“
You mean no one ever told you that I know her?” Brant asked.

Lauryn shook her head, as a gesture of assuring him that no one ever had.

“
If you’re nodding or shaking your head, sweetheart…keep in mind…I can’t hear your brain rattling,” he growled resentfully. Lauryn looked at him angrily, only then remembering that he was sightless. Of course, he couldn’t hear her head nodding.

“
No one ever told me about you,” she told him humbly.

He was angrily silent for a moment. Then sighing heavily he mumbled, “I suppose no one would’ve ever told me about you either if they hadn’t thought I was going insane.”

“
I’d be insane if I couldn’t talk to the Captain,” Lauryn muttered out loud to herself.

“
You call him that?” Brant asked. His voice was so affecting to her senses that a tickle ran down her spine causing her to shiver. Its deep intonation seemed to vibrate through her soul. “Captain?”

“
I do,” Lauryn admitted.

Then she began to study him again. The man couldn’t see her, so why not take the opportunity to look at him. She studied the lines of his face, the strength of his jaw, the texture of his hair, which was the darkest shade of brown, not quite black, but almost. His shoulders were incredibly broad, his arms very muscular and his hands very masculine. Nothing was pampered or manicured about them. They visually told the tale of a hard-working man, even considering the weeks he had been unable to labor because of his loss of sight. Lauryn noted the large scar that ran diagonally over the back of his right hand, noted the calluses on his palms. The breadth of his chest nearly matched that of his shoulders! The shirt he wore bordered on being too small, for it was stretched to its limits, revealing a very well-sculpted torso beneath. Brant Masterson was, undeniably, magnificent to look at. And Lauryn fully appreciated the opportunity to study him so without his knowledge.

“
And…and he talks to you?” he asked again interrupting her thoughts. Brant shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it. “You actually hear his voice and hold conversations with him?”

“
Yes,” is all Lauryn could say, for somehow she felt devious for studying him so intimately without his knowledge and guilt-ridden for the blessing of the Captain’s friendship.

“
I met your grandmother when I was younger,” Brant began. “I was fourteen. And incredibly frustrated with the fact that I couldn’t help Laura. I flew into a rage at my Aunt Felicity one day and she…she thought I was losing my mind.” He paused for a moment and mumbled, “I wonder now if maybe I was.” Shaking his head he continued. “So my aunt contacted your grandmother and she came out to Castledale and talked with me. She told me that her little granddaughter, you, knew Brandon…that he wanted you to help him find Lauralynn. I couldn’t understand it. If I had Laura and the little granddaughter had Brandon…why couldn’t we just tell them where they each were and have it all work out?”

“
What
is
the reason?” Lauryn asked. For, indeed, it seemed simple enough an answer.

The man shrugged his massive shoulders in a rather boyish gesture. “She’s lost. I asked Laura…I told her where Brand was. She just shook her head and cried and I don’t know how I understood….but I did. I have to find the part of her that was lost here…during her life. For some reason…I can’t figure it out…there has to be something else…but until I find out what happened to her…her body…she can’t go to him.” He shook his head and rubbed at the whiskers on his chin for a moment.

Then, angrily, he seemed to change, to turn on her like a rabid dog. Standing he barked, “I don’t even know you! Why the hell am I talking to you?”

Lauryn stood, too, so startled by his sudden change in demeanor that she was immediately provoked to defense. “Because…because it’s like you said. I’m the only one alive who understands what you’re lookin’ for.”

“
You don’t understand anything!” he growled. “You’re just a pampered little southern girl who…”

“
And you’re far too steeped in self pity to see anyone else’s…” she began to argue back at him. His words had hurt her deeply. Far more deeply than a stranger’s words should have the power to.

“
Save your self-righteous lectures for someone who will benefit from them, girl.”

His voice was filled with anger. Anger and pain. Lauryn knew that whatever had happened to Brant Masterson in the war, whatever horrible event had left him blind, had also left him worthy of owning resentment and self-pity. But the path was set now.

“
All right,” was all she could stammer as the tears filled her eyes. “Good day to you, Mr. Masterson.” And she turned to leave him.

She was halted, however as Brant reached out and took her arm. “Hey, Laura…” he began to apologize.

“
My name is Lauryn,” she spat at him. For some reason she didn’t fully understand, Lauryn wanted to be sure he knew the difference between her name and her great aunt’s.

“
Lauryn,” he corrected himself. “I’m…I’m sorry I was rude to you. I’m just….not the person I used to be.”

“
Well, that’s a conscious choice you’ve made, Mr. Masterson,” Lauryn stated, finding it hard to easily forgive him for his abuse of her emotions. “I have absolutely no doubt that you have endured more…more torture
than I can ever imagine. But if you were once a man of character, of manners…you still are. Or else you’ve chosen not to be. Now…if you’ll excuse me,” she said, her voice breaking and betraying her emotion. Pulling her arm from his grasp, Lauryn stepped over men and cots, making her way back to the passenger car.

“
Miss Kensington!” she heard him call after her. “Lauryn, wait!”

The tears were streaming down her face. Somehow Lauryn felt as if this man she’d known for mere minutes, this stranger, had reached into her chest and taken her heart in his hand, crushing it in the power of his masculine, callused fist. She could not return to him, even to accept an apology! For what would he think of a girl who became so emotional over a stranger’s opinions?

“
Lauryn? Honey?” she heard her Nana call.

But she rushed on. Reaching the door leading to the passenger car, she fairly burst through it causing startled passengers to look up curiously. Lauryn noted the many sets of eyebrows that rose, astonished to see a young woman in tears charging toward her seat. Self-consciously, she sat down next to the window that such a short time before had been the object of her reflection. She marveled at the difference in the image looking back at her now. In an hour’s time she’d gone from an innocent, sweet girl looking forward to returning home to family and friends, to a young woman who knew sudden and immediate heartache at the hand of a complete stranger!

He knew her! Brant Masterson knew Lauralynn! All these years that Lauryn had been searching for her…trying to find where and when she died so the Captain could rest…all this time, Brant had known her. It was unfathomable! Surreal!

“
Honey, whatever is the matter?” Nana asked as she took the seat next to her granddaughter. Taking Lauryn’s hand she kissed the back of it tenderly and reached up smoothing a stray curl from Lauryn’s cheek.

For a moment, Lauryn could only shake her head, trying to stop her tears and swallow the lump in her throat. Finally she turned to her Nana and quietly asked, “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

Nana looked away guiltily for a moment. “About a boy who saw Lauralynn?” Lauryn nodded. Nana smiled. “Because I feared it would plague you to know that Laura was found…by someone. I feared it would frustrate you to know it…. make you unhappy and cause you to see your search for her as pointless.”

Lauryn nodded, instantly understanding the wisdom in her grandmother’s secrecy. For Lauryn knew herself. And it would’ve, indeed, plagued her and caused her great unhappiness had she known of Brant and his association with Lauralynn.

“
Oh, Brant. You’ve found us, then.” Lauryn looked up having heard her Nana’s greeting. Brant stood there, his hand on Dr. Nelson’s shoulder.

“
Nana,” Lauryn whispered as her grandmother motioned for Dr. Nelson to seat Brant directly across from Lauryn. “Don’t leave me with him,” she pleaded in an even softer whisper as her grandmother stood.

“
I’ve got to…finish makin’ the arrangements with Dr. Nelson, Lauryn. If we’re to have a guest…there’s things I should know,” Nana explained. Then, much to Lauryn’s astonishment, her Nana, still holding Lauryn’s hand, placed it in Brant’s. He held it tightly, signaling that there was no escape this time. He would have his say with her.

“
Thank you, Doc,” Brant mumbled.

“
Y’all be good, Captain,” Dr. Nelson warned. Brant nodded his frown deepening.

“
Nana?” Lauryn pleaded.

“
You have a good long talk with Mr. Masterson, honey. It’s about time. Don’t you think?” And with that Nana accepted Dr. Nelson’s arm and left her granddaughter in the company of the strange and unnervingly attractive Brant Masterson.

Lauryn immediately tried to pull her hand from Brant’s grasp. It was completely unsettling the way he held her fingers in both of his hands now, stroking the backs of them lightly with his thumbs. But he held tight, foiling any attempt to escape him without causing a disturbance. Instantly, Lauryn felt her tears begin anew, traveling the still moist path down her cheeks as she looked at the handsome, haunted man before her. He frightened her! The feeling in her bosom, as if she might explode with delight and pain at the same time as she looked at him, frightened her.