The Fixed Trilogy: Fixed on You, Found in You, Forever With You (35 page)

On the other hand, Hudson had told me more than once that he’d never wanted to play me either. Did he refrain from playing Norma for similar reasons? Because he felt something for her?

The idea made me sick with jealousy.

And it didn’t give me any answers as to whether or not she was special to him now or in the past. If I really wanted to know, I’d have to look closer at Norma. I made a mental note to do a Google search in my free time.

Then I deleted the mental note.

What the hell was I thinking? Internet-stalking was for the old Alayna Withers. I would not stoop to that level. Hudson wanted me with him. Always. What other proof did I need to know I was the important woman in his life?

We halted the conversation to let the waitress serve us. When we were alone again, I started up as if we’d never stopped. “You’re probably right. I don’t know why I’m worrying about it, really. I’m the one he asked to move in with him, not her.”

“Exactly.” Her smile vanished. “Wait, what? He asked you to move in? That’s awesome!”

It was awesome. Utterly awesome, and for the first time, I let myself truly feel the awesomeness of it rather than just the fear. I played it casually though, shrugging it off as no big deal. “I don’t know. It’s too soon. Isn’t it too soon?”

“Whatever. Are there rules about these things?” Celia talked around a forkful of salad. “When Hudson knows what he wants, he doesn’t hesitate.”

I tried not to let it bother me that Celia knew Hudson cold. “He told me pretty much the same thing.” I swallowed. “When I told him no.”

“You didn’t!” She gasped and her expression matched her surprised exclamation.

“I did. Well, I said I’d think about it.”

Celia was beyond excited. “And now you’ve thought about it and you’re going to say yes. You have to say yes. How can you not say yes? This is Hudson Pierce!”

“I don’t love him for that reason.” Not because he was world-renowned billionaire business mogul Hudson Pierce, anyway. But because he was who he was—unique and special in so many ways.

“All the more reason you have to say yes. And that’s exactly why you’re the one he wants. You aren’t caught up in the show that surrounds him. You can’t imagine how few people are.” She pulled her loose blonde hair to one side of her head. “Jesus, Alayna, you’re perfect for him. You have to move in. You’ll break his heart if you don’t. He so obviously loves you.”

Was it really that obvious? “He still hasn’t said it.”

“But didn’t he? Asking you to move in with him…that seems like saying it to me. In the only way Hudson can.”

Just like how he’d needed to show me the night before how he felt about me with his body since he couldn’t say it with words.

Okay. Maybe Celia had a point.

Or she simply understood my lover way better than I did.

“Damn it.” I had wanted to be responsible this time. Wanted to ride this relationship with caution, to not fuck any of it up like I usually did, and here both Hudson and Celia had compelling reasons to throw all caution to the wind. “I do need a new place to live.”

“Get out! This is perfect then. Like, fated or whatever.”

It had been convenient that I’d found Hudson just when Brian had decided to stop supporting me. I hadn’t ever bought into the idea of fate or destiny, but maybe there was something about being meant for each other that deserved to be credited. Or else Hudson merely had impeccable timing. Whatever the reason, we’d found each other, and thinking about the immensity of that made me choke up. “Ah, I can’t talk about this anymore. It’s making me all twitchy and emotional.”

Celia smiled with equally watery eyes. “But you’re going to say yes, right?”

I gave an almost imperceptible nod.

“You are!” Celia clapped her hands together. “I feel like I should hug you. I’m a hugger. But we’re eating and in a restaurant so maybe that would be weird. This will have to do.” She placed her hand over mine and squeezed.

I was beyond grateful that we were at a restaurant because I was not a hugger. The hand squeeze was a good compromise and actually sort of nice. It was good to have a friend that really understood the things I was going through. That’s what Celia was now to me—a friend.

She was still beaming when she took her hand off mine. “When are you going to tell him? Tonight?”

“No. I don’t think so. I have a meeting at eight-thirty so he’s taking me to an early dinner at six and I don’t want to tell him when we’re rushed.”

She frowned. “You have a meeting? Tonight?”

“Yeah. Why do you think that’s weird?” Or was I misreading her expression?

“Not weird. Just horrible that you have to work on a Friday evening. Doesn’t the fact that you’re sleeping with the boss award you certain privileges?”

I laughed. “You would think. It was Hudson that set it up for me, and I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth.”

“Oh. Interesting.” She smoothed her eyebrows with her index finger, as if they would have gotten out of place. “Who’s the meeting with anyway?”

“Aaron Trent.”

“Wow. Major score, Laynie.” For a minute I thought she might give me a high five. “I guess you can’t complain about landing a meeting with Aaron Trent. Even if it occupies your Friday night.”

“And that’s the privilege I get for sleeping with the boss. Good contacts. I owe Hudson big time.” I thought about what I’d said. “Except he hates being referred to as my boss.”

“Why doesn’t that surprise me?”

“So I’ll tell him I’ll move in tomorrow. No big deal. Then I can plan some way special to tell him.” Or at least make sure that there would be time for celebrating after, because there was no way I’d make it through that conversation without being mauled. Not that I was complaining.

“Hey, can I borrow your phone a minute?” Celia held her hand out expectantly.

“Uh, yeah.” I unlocked my screen and handed it over, curiosity lacing my tone.

“Thanks. Mine is acting so stupid. It doesn’t ring half the time, which I figure is part of the reason I never get to the phone.” She dialed some numbers on my phone and waited. “See? Not ringing.” She hit redial and tried again. “Nothing. I guess I need to take my phone in. Thanks.”

“No problem.” I took my phone back and stuck it in my bra. “Oh, I, um, I didn’t end up telling Hudson I saw you yesterday.”

“Decided it was too tricky of a convo?”

“It never came up. And then after today—”

“You aren’t going to tell him,” she finished for me. “I wouldn’t either. I mean, I really don’t want to encourage secrets, but this is really no big deal. And Hudson would make it a big deal.”

“A huge deal.” Especially considering the subject matter of our discussion. “So we’re good keeping it on the down low?”

“I won’t say a word. Pinky swear.”

“Pinky swear.” I waved my little finger in the air, mimicking her.

Hopefully pinky swears actually counted for something in the rich, exotic world of Celia Werner and Hudson Pierce. Because things were going so well in my life, and that meant I had so much to lose. All it would take is a little slip of the tongue from one of us to knock down my beautiful house of cards.

Chapter Nine

The rest of the afternoon flew by as I finished up my marketing plan for my meeting with Aaron Trent. Then, an email from Julia with suggestions for package changes occupied me long enough that I had to put off going to my apartment for another time. All in all, it was a productive day, and by the time Hudson texted that he was on his way, I was famished and eager to see my man.

I stopped at the upstairs bar when I saw purple hair dancing behind the counter. “Liesl!” It hadn’t occurred to me how much I’d miss my co-worker when I changed my schedule to work days.

“Hey, girlfriend!” Liesl knew me well enough to know I preferred to keep my personal space. Instead of a hug, she offered a high five. “You’re looking hot.” She chomped her gum as she looked me up and down. “Things must still be good with Houston Piers.”

“Hudson Pierce,” I corrected. “Say it with me.”

She blew a big bubble and let it pop. “I know his name. Now. I just like dickin’ with you.” She grinned. “Tell me all about you and the psychotically hot one. And start with the sex.”

“That would take a while.” I suddenly wished I wasn’t on my way out, that I had time to sit and chat with my friend. I’d lied to her like I’d lied to everyone when the Hudson/Alayna coupledom was pretend, even though I’d ached to tell her the truth. And at the sight of her, I ached again to tell her how amazing things were going, but I’d have to give her the backstory to explain why things were different than the last time I’d said things were amazing. Given the chance, I’d tell her everything. But I didn’t have that chance at the moment, and a sadness settled over me at the realization of how far apart we’d grown over the last couple of weeks.

She pinned me with a penetrating stare. “But things are good?”

I knew what she was really asking—was I still in control of my obsessing? Was I still sane? “Things are very good, actually. Wanna do lunch some time and catch up?”

Her eyes went wide. “Definitely. I miss you!”

“I miss you, too!” Having Celia as a friend didn’t take the place of Liesl. I’d have to make a better effort to stay in touch.

“You have your purse on your shoulder. Does that mean you’re leaving?” She leaned her elbows on the bar and rested her chin in her hands.

“I am. But I’ll be back. Hudson’s taking me to dinner.”

“Yeah, dinner. That’s what it’s called.” She winked. “But David said you’d been here all day, so why are you coming back? We got your night shifts covered.”

“I know, and thanks so much for that. But I have a meeting later.”

“Oh.” She tugged at her purple strands that I noticed now had blue highlights added. “Wait, does that meeting of yours happen to be with some Trent guy?”

“Yes—”
How did she…
“Liesl, is there something you forgot to tell me?”

She popped another bubble, the watermelon scent wafting to me. “Yeah, his secretary called a while ago and said he needs to reschedule.” She shrugged.

I clapped my hand to my forehead.

“Sorry. Guess I forgot to mention it.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s actually awesome news. Okay, maybe not exactly awesome since I spent all flipping day preparing to meet with the guy, but now I have Friday night off.”

“And now you’re not coming back.” Liesl put on her best pout.

“Nope. My turn to say sorry.” My phone buzzed with a text from Hudson saying he was outside. “That’s Hudson. Gotta go.”

“You’re choosing him over me?” Liesl loved to play up the drama.

“You don’t have the goods that Hudson does.” I pushed my purse strap higher on my shoulder.

“I have different goods. Still good goods, though. You just need to give them a chance!”

I laughed as I walked away, waving over my shoulder. Liesl was bi-curious and often pretended to flirt with me. At least, I thought she was pretending. Didn’t matter, I had no interest in women sexually. No interest in anyone but the man waiting for me outside.

I stepped out of the club and shielded my eyes against the sun, expecting to see the Maybach. Instead, a black limousine was at the curb. Upon seeing me, Jordan climbed out of the car and circled to open the back door.

“Hey,” I said, to Jordan, ogling him as discreetly as I could. He was too yummy not to.

“Good evening, Ms. Withers.”

I stepped in the car, my heart immediately picking up its pace at the sight of Hudson waiting inside. “A limousine two nights in a row? What’s the occasion this time?”

“I thought we had a nice drive yesterday.”

The door shut behind me, and I was already scooting toward Hudson as he reached for me, pulling me into his lap.

“A nice drive or a nice ride?” I was already slippery down below remembering our trip to the Botanic Gardens. I would not be opposed to a repeat performance.

“If I remember correctly, you rode. I drove.” His mouth found mine, one hand cradling my face as the other wrapped around my waist. He sucked at my bottom lip before slipping in to lick along my teeth. I stroked my tongue under the bottom of his until he accepted the invitation to dance, wrapping around mine as our lips shifted and molded against each other.

The lurch of the car pulling into traffic pulled me out of our embrace. I maneuvered to the seat next to Hudson and latched my belt. A part of me was surprised that he hadn’t brought up moving in again or that he wasn’t tense waiting for my answer. Now that my night was free, I could go ahead and tell him over dinner. Or screw dinner and tell him in the car. But I’d wanted the moment to be right. “So…how was your day?”

He put his arm around my shoulder, holding me as close as safety would allow. His fingers played with the loose tendrils of hair at my neck. “You were there for the only part of today that mattered. And that part was fantastic.”

He took my hand in his, caressing it, and the way he moved his fingers across my skin lit my whole body on fire. “How about your day?”

“Ditto.” I’d been eager to share the details of what I was working on in the club. But now that I was with him, business could wait. Now my only interest was us. Us together. Us in love. “Though, I do have a surprise for you.”

His lips curled into a devilish grin. “Are you not wearing underwear?” His hand slid between my thighs as if he was determined to discover the answer for himself.

I smacked his hand away even though I burned to have his fingers go further, to rub against my clit in that expert way of his. We’d get there soon enough. I had time to tease. We had all night now that my meeting had been canceled. “I’m wearing underwear, you perv. If you’d wanted me to go without, you shouldn’t have stocked me with panties.”

“The panties were for when you were in the company of others. And right now we’re alone.”

I nodded toward the direction of the front seat, knowing full well that Jordan couldn’t see or hear us behind the dark divider. “Somewhat.”

“Somewhat enough.” He let go of my hand and placed it high on my thigh instead. The gleam in his eyes said he was planning to ravage me right there in the back of his limo on the way to dinner. Again. “Tell me your surprise.”

“I spent most of my day preparing for my meeting with Aaron Trent. And I just found out he canceled.”

“He canceled?” Hudson was instantly furious. He pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contacts. “Let me call him. If he can’t bother to show up tonight then he doesn’t need to bother working on my other accounts with him.”

I put my hand over his, stilling his phone search. “He must have had a good reason to cancel. I’ll call him in the morning. It’s not a biggie. I had a long day anyway and I’m happy to postpone.”

“Then I’ll call to reschedule.”

“No, let me. Please.” I hadn’t realized how important this was to me until right then. Yes, I’d landed the connection because of Hudson and I’d likely get a good deal because of him as well. But I needed a chance to prove what I could do. “I’d like to handle this on my own.”

Hudson sighed, pocketing his phone. “If that’s what you want. But tell me if he doesn’t give you the respect you deserve.”

“Because my rich, powerful boyfriend stepping in to fight my battles will earn his esteem.”

“Isn’t that what boyfriends are supposed to do?”

“Um, not my boyfriend.” Leaning into the crook of his arm, I traced my finger along the curve of his jaw. “I’ll let you know when I need you, H. For now, though, let me do this myself?”

“Of course.” He captured my finger between his teeth and chewed on the pad. I was wet instantly.

My eyes never left his mouth, riveted to the things he was doing to my finger—promises for later that evening. Or sooner, the way things were progressing. “And, the awesome thing about him canceling is that now you’ve got me all night. Whatcha gonna do with me?”

He removed my finger from his mouth. “You’re not going back tonight?”

“Nope. I’m all yours. You can take me out, and then I can take you in.” I waggled my brows suggestively. I hadn’t had that many opportunities to play with Hudson, and I was enjoying myself. Our relationship before had been confined to “show” and “sex.” This in between stuff was still new. And awfully fun.

Hudson sat up straighter, his arm moving from my shoulder to the back of the seat instead. “Actually, I can’t.” He didn’t meet my eyes. “I arranged dinner with you, but then I have other plans.”

“Oh.” I swallowed. “Yeah, of course. I shouldn’t have assumed.” Just because we had a relationship now didn’t mean that he didn’t have a life of his own. Hudson was a busy man—he had business deals and charity events and all sorts of things that didn’t involve me. Why did it feel so much like a rejection, then?

Hudson sighed. “Alayna.”

“Nope, my bad.” My throat felt tight, but I forced a smile. “I’ll watch one of my movies or catch up on my reading. Not a biggie.”

“But we still have dinner.”

“Yep.” I nodded too long. As if nodding could erase all the suspicions that were entering my mind. Like, what were his other plans? Who had plans at eight on a Friday night? Why wasn’t he telling me what they were so that I wouldn’t assume the worst? Because I
was
assuming the worst. Big time. Assuming dates with other women and…and…well, mostly that—dates with other women. Women like Norma Anders.

I could ask him. But I knew if I asked, it would sound like an accusation. Or I was afraid it would sound like an accusation. Because it would totally be an accusation.

So I didn’t ask. I wouldn’t.

We sat in silence for about thirty seconds.

Then I couldn’t handle it any longer. “So, um, what exactly are your other plans?” I squeezed his leg, hoping that would lighten any tension I might have created.

“It’s...” He shook his head. “It’s nothing.”

So much for lightening the tension. “Seriously? You can’t say it’s nothing and expect me to let that drop.” I added an awkward laugh to cover any shrillness that might be hiding in my tone. Inside, the paranoia built in my chest—paranoia that absolutely drove me insane and, like the most determined weed, was almost impossible to kill once it took root. I had to fight it, I couldn’t let it win.

Hudson’s jaw twitched. He was considering. Or trying to make up a good lie. Finally he spoke. “I’m going to a dinner with my mother.”

Sophia. Just thinking about her made my spirits sink. No wonder Hudson didn’t want to bring it up.

“Oh.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to sort the situation out. “But we’re going to dinner now.”

He didn’t bat an eye. “I was planning to eat light.”

“You were planning to eat twice? We can skip dinner. Eat with her. I can catch a bite later.” That sounded like an understanding girlfriend, right? Because that’s how I needed to sound, despite the fact that I felt anything but understanding.

“I’d rather eat with you and skip dinner with her.”

“Then do that.”

“I can’t. It’s her birthday. She expects me there.”

And there it was. The rest of the story. “Today’s your mother’s birthday and you weren’t going to mention it?”

He removed his arm from behind me and dropped it into his lap. “It’s not like you two are close.”

“But you are!” I swiveled as much as the seatbelt would allow so I could face him. “She’s your mother. Your family is important to you, whether you want to admit it or not. If I’m important to you, too, then shouldn’t you share what’s up with them?”

He met my eyes, piercing me in such a way I had to brace for his words. “You are important to me, Alayna, and me not telling you about this has no reflection on that.” He relaxed his stare. “You were going to be at work, there was no reason to even mention it.”

“But now I’m not working...”

“And now you know.”

I knew because I’d dragged it from him. I knew because my circumstances changed and forced him to have to tell me. And the only reason I’d planned to be at work in the first place was because Hudson had conveniently arranged for me to be. He’d worked to keep this dinner from me. Did he really think that he could pick and choose the things he chose to share in a relationship?

Maybe he did. To his credit, he hadn’t had a real relationship before.

And wasn’t I picking and choosing what I shared with him?

I didn’t want to think about that. My secrets had no bearing on the conversation at hand. My secrets were still safe. His was not. And finding out he’d kept something from me didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel good. He should have told me. Hell, he should have invited me!

I blinked back a tear that was threatening to fall. “Is it just going to be you and her?”

“No. The rest of my family will be there, too.”

My lip quivered. “And you’re still not going to invite me?”

“No, I’m not.”

I didn’t say anything. Tears were falling now and I didn’t think I could talk. God, since I’d been with Hudson, I’d turned into a total crier. How embarrassing.

Hudson moved to wipe away a tear, but I pulled away, not wanting his touch.

“It’s family only, Alayna. Not a big deal.”

“Family only. Yep, I get it.” I tried not to let that sting. Of course I wasn’t family, but I’d been welcomed by most of them—by Mira, her husband Adam, by Hudson’s father Jack. And now Hudson wanted me to live with him. Didn’t that automatically earn me invites to family events?