“When was I ever creepy?”
“Are you kidding? I was scared shitless when I first saw you at River Fest. You had veins bulging out of your neck!” I giggled. “But you’re not so bad. I guess.”
He looked at me with a friendly smile. “You’re good for him, Liv. I hope you stick around.”
I laughed. “Why wouldn’t I?”
As we headed back down to the basement, I heard a door slam. Chloe came storming out of the back room, her face flushed and eyes wet. When she saw me, a look of fury flooded her face, and she stomped over to me and slapped me hard.
“Ow! W-w-what in the ever-loving hell?” I screamed. As if this night wasn’t weird enough already.
“You need to wake the fuck up and realize what you’ve got, you stupid bitch!” she angrily shouted as Matt quickly came between us. Then, her fury melted into sadness as she began to cry uncontrollably. She grabbed her cell phone and keys off the bar and barreled past me, up the stairs.
I looked at Matt. “She’s not driving, is she?”
“I’m on it,” Matt said and quickly chased after her.
Confused beyond belief, I went over and sat down on the couch next to Gavin. Mel came and sat down next to me. “Holy shit, Liv, are you okay?”
“Yeah. Just…Ugh! What the hell?” I replied.
As I rubbed my aching cheek, Gavin reached for his phone, which was lighting up on the coffee table, and answered, “Yeah, what’s up? Nah…tonight’s not a good night.”
“Who is that?” Logan asked from behind us. I hadn’t heard him come out of the back room, and his voice startled me. Gavin, Melody, and I turned around to see Logan looking completely disheveled with messed up hair and bloodshot eyes. “If it’s a race, I’m going.”
Gavin nodded and began his negotiation.
“Are you kidding me?” I asked in disbelief. He had been drinking all night. Logan glared at me but didn’t say a word. He didn’t need to. I could tell that he blamed me for whatever happened in that room with Chloe. Instead, he turned and took his keys off the bar just before bolting up the stairs. Terror set in my blood at the thought of him driving in his condition.
Without thinking, I stood up. “So help me God, Logan, if you take another step I’m going to sic Matt on you!!!” I shouted in a panic-stricken voice. “Don’t you
dare
drive tonight!” Tears stung my eyes, and my entire body began to tremble. I didn’t know what I would do if something happened to him.
He stopped in the middle of the stairs. Facing away, with his hand on the railing, his head dropped, then his shoulders lifted up and down slightly. Was he laughing? He seemed to take a deep breath to calm himself down. When he turned around, his intense gaze met mine immediately. He had a bewildered expression on his face. Even drunk out of his mind, he was flawless.
“You’re going to
sic
Matt on me?” Then he said it again as if he needed to make sure he heard me clearly. “You’re going to
sic
Matt on me.” He shook his head and let out a single laugh as he started to walk toward me, keeping his eyes on me. He stopped a foot in front of me, causing my head to tilt up slightly in order to meet his eyes. “Who says that, Liv? Who…in the hell…says things like that?”
Embarrassed, I searched for anything else to focus on, but I didn’t want to look at anyone else either, so I just looked down at the floor, doing my best to fight the tears that were creeping up. My restraint held up for the most part, except for the trembling, but then I thought about how important he had actually become to me. If he drove drunk tonight, the chance of losing him was huge. And the thought of him being buried in the ground, like Kevin, was too much to bear.
With all my strength, I nervously looked up and met his confused glazed-over eyes. My eyes burned, and I could no longer hold back the single tear that escaped from my right eye. “Just don’t drive tonight, okay?” I whispered, just loud enough for him to hear. “Please.”
Our eyes locked for a moment, mine pleading with his. His expression softened as he brought his hand to my cheek and wiped away my tear with his thumb. My eyes instinctively closed from the incredible feeling of his touch. Finally, he took a deep breath. “Fine,” he said, defeated. My eyes opened as he removed his hand from my face and pointed at Gavin. “I’m crashing in your room.”
“No way, where am I gonna sleep?” Gavin retorted. Isaac threw a couch pillow at him while the others shouted words of protest at him. Apparently, they had all been watching our transaction. “Fine, asshole, sleep in my bed! Don’t enjoy it too much, you pansy.”
Logan ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation, then turned around and walked up the stairs. I watched as he turned towards Gavin’s room when he reached the top, instead of going outside. Relief washed over me, knowing that he was safe.
It took everything in me not to chase after him. I wanted nothing more than to lay beside him and fall asleep next to him, wrapped up in his warm embrace. As I stood staring at the stairs, I realized that he meant so much more to me that I had previously allowed myself to believe. But I had seen this story play out more than once. I watched it happen several times, with each ending being just as devastating as the last, if not more. There was no way in hell I would let it take place again. I knew in my heart that getting too close would be the first step towards the demise of us. If I wanted to keep him, I had to let him go.
My attention turned to Evan. Despite the situation, he appeared incredibly calm. He leaned his pool cue against the wall and walked over to me, placing his hand on the small of my back. “You wanna get outta here, babe?”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “Would you mind taking me home?”
“No problem.”
We said our goodbyes and climbed into Evan’s car. He kept the mood light, and kept the conversation going strong. After a few minutes of talking with him my spirits lifted. I liked Evan. I wasn’t sure I had ever met someone so laid back. His attitude throughout the evening had been remarkable, and I felt I owed it to him to address the awkward ending to our night.
“I’m sorry things got weird before.” I said as we stopped in front of a red light.
“No worries. I had fun,” he replied.
“Really? Even that last part?”
He laughed, “Yeah, I guess that last part was interesting. But I’m cool with it.” He looked at me. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Just checking.”
“Well, I had fun too. Up until that last part.” I smiled at him.
His eyes beamed as he glanced at me. “Fun is good.”
“I like fun.”
His smile widened as the light turned green. His eyes returned to the road as he drove ahead. “Since we both had fun, and it’s good to have fun, maybe we could have fun again sometime.”
I laughed. “Sounds like fun.”
Chapter Twelve
The music was on full blast at the pub the next morning, just the way I liked it. My mind wouldn’t stop thinking about the things that took place last night. I didn’t like what was happening with Logan and me. We definitely weren’t the same, but I didn’t know how to fix it.
I made sure to pick more upbeat songs on the juke box, in an effort to keep my mood light, so when my favorite Katy Perry song came on, I took a break from my pub cleaning duties to jump on top of the bar and pretend I was her. My body moved to the music as I clenched my invisible microphone and belted out the lyrics at the top of my lungs. Then I heard a knock at the door.
It wasn’t unusual for pub patrons to try to come in, thinking the pub opened earlier. I jumped down from the bar and looked over to tell whoever it was that we were closed, but when I looked through the glass doors, I saw Logan with an amused grin on his face. But there was a hint of…something else in his eyes.
He clearly saw me dancing. I looked down at what I was wearing…an old t-shirt, yoga pants, and sneakers. Lovely. I looked back up at him and grinned, then shrugged.
I went to the door, looking at him briefly before opening it. There was a look of concern behind his amused expression. Things had been going downhill with us lately, and I was afraid of what was going to happen.
I opened the door. “What are you doing here?”
“I was thinking about you cleaning those nasty bathrooms, and I came to help,” he replied, still grinning slightly. “Someone like you shouldn’t have to do a job like that.”
“Someone like me?” I asked, becoming defensive. “What’s that supposed to mean? I’m a big girl, Logan. I can handle it.”
“I know. No, that’s not what I meant,” he sighed. “Just let me help you. Please.”
The bathrooms were the worst part of the job, and I hated cleaning them. “And what, exactly, do you get out of helping me?” I asked.
“What, can’t a guy do a good deed? I don’t expect anything in return, Liv. I promise.”
I supposed it wouldn’t hurt. “Well, if you insist.”
I showed him where the supplies were and what to do. I turned around to start my work when he took my arm, forcing me to face him. “Hey, Liv?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry about last night.” His hopeful eyes awaited my response as he held my hand. I couldn’t seem to look away from them. But if I looked at them another moment, I would surely break. So I forced myself to look down at the floor.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Logan. We’re good.” Taking a deep breath for strength, I looked back up at him with the most reassuring smile I could conjure up. I hoped it was believable. He didn’t seem too sure of my comment, so I continued, “Let’s just never do that again, okay?”
“Do what?” he awaited my response, but I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t sure what to say. All I knew was I wanted things to be back to normal. “Liv, tell me, what don’t you want us to do?”
“Not speak to each other for so long. I missed you. It sucked.” I pulled him by the hand and wrapped my arms around his middle, resting my cheek on his chest. If only I could hold on to this feeling of being in his arms.
He sighed and tightened his hold on me. “Yeah, it sucked pretty damn bad. I promise. It won’t happen again.”
Relief washed over me. “Good. Now, I’ve got work to do,” I said, pulling away. “Some of us have jobs, you know.”
He grinned. “Yeah. Suckers.”
I turned around to get started at the bar area.
“Nothing happened,” he said. I turned back to face him, not sure what he was talking about. He continued, “With Chloe. We just kissed.”
“None of my business, Logan,” I said, as I walked away from him with my hands in the air.
“And there was some touching.”
I faced him again to see him grinning like an idiot. “LOGAN!!!”
“What? I didn’t bang her, okay?”
“Oh. My. God.” I turned around with my fingers in my ears and went behind the bar to turn the music up. I cranked it high. When I looked back at Logan from across the pub, he still had a grin on his face. Whenever he tried to say something, I cupped my hand behind my ear and mouthed,
“I can’t hear you,”
then shrugged. His head tilted back as he laughed, and then he entered the men’s bathroom and went to work.
We spent at least an hour working separately. When he finished, he came out with a disgusted look on his face.
“That’s it, we’re hiring people to do this,” he said. There was something in his voice and in his demeanor that made me feel like we really were good. We really were back to normal.
“Yeah,
I’m
the hired help, remember? I’m not doing this for my health.
I
get paid to do it.”
“Well then, I’m going to do it for you. You are not doing that job anymore.”
My eyes rolled as I handed him a glass of water, and he sat down on a bar stool. He watched me as I finished the dishes on the other side of the bar. I felt water dripping on me from somewhere, and I looked up to see a mischievous grin on his face. Then I watched him put his fingers in his water and flick it in my face.
“Hey!” I shouted. Then he did it again, so I took the water dispenser from under the bar and pointed it at him. “Stop it if you know what’s good for you.”
He eyed the water gun, then me. “You wouldn’t.”
“Try me,” I challenged.
He studied me for a moment, as if he were trying to decide whether or not I was bluffing. Then he slowly put his fingers in his water glass and deliberately flicked the liquid in my face again. I pushed the button for only a split second, but that was all I needed to drench his t-shirt with water. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped as he looked down at his soaked shirt, then looked up at me as he shook his head.
“Oh, that’s it. You’re gonna get it,” he warned with a playful smile, and he jumped over the bar to my side.
“Stay back! I’m still armed!” I giggled.
“So am I,” he responded as he took his glass of water and dumped it over my head.
“Hey!” I pushed the button on the water dispenser, this time holding it down for good, making sure he was as drenched as I was. He came after me, causing me to squeal and step back quickly. Suddenly, I lost my footing and stumbled in an effort to stop myself from falling. Logan grabbed me just before I lost it and pulled me toward him with so much force that it caused both of us to fall to the floor.
After the initial shock wore off and I realized I was ok and nothing was broken, I busted into laughter, which in turn caused him to start chuckling. Once we settled down, I became aware of how we landed. We were close. Extremely close. And soaked. I had fallen on top of him with his arms around me. His eyes locked with mine, and the laughter ceased. His touch gave me a feeling of comfort. It felt good, and I realized I didn’t want him to let go.
The feel of his heartbeat on my chest caused my own heart to start pounding hard. Slowly, I lifted my head, trying to somehow pull myself off of him and saw his eyes darken. His breath tickled my face, and the longer we stared at each other, the weaker I felt, even though all my senses became heightened.