The Fiery Heart (4 page)

Ms. Terwilliger, who'd drank more wine than anyone else, waved me off and poured another glass. I was her ride, so it wasn't like she had anywhere to go. I answered the phone as I retreated to the kitchen, only a little surprised that my mom would call. We kept in touch, and she knew evenings were a good time to get a hold of me to chat. But when she spoke, there was an urgency in her voice that told me this wasn't a casual call.

“Sydney? Have you talked to Zoe?”

My mental alarms went off. “Not since this afternoon. Is something wrong?”

My mom took a deep breath. “Sydney . . . your father and I are splitting up. We're getting a divorce.”

For a moment, the world spun, and I leaned against the kitchen counter for support. I swallowed. “I see.”

“I'm so sorry,” she said. “I know how hard this will be on you.”

I thought about it. “No . . . not exactly. I mean, I guess . . . well, I can't say that I'm surprised.”

She'd once told me that my dad had been more easygoing in his youth. It was hard for me to imagine, but obviously, she'd married him for some reason. Over the years, my dad had grown cold and intractable, throwing himself into the Alchemist cause with a devotion that took precedence over all other things in his life, including his daughters. He'd become harsh and single-minded, and I'd long since realized I was more of a tool for the greater good in his eyes than his daughter.

My mom, on the other hand, was warm and funny, always willing to show affection and listen to us when we needed her. She was quick with a smile . . . though she didn't seem to smile so much these days.

“I know it'll be emotionally difficult for you and Carly,” she said. “But it won't affect your daily lives that much.”

I pondered her word choice. Me and Carly. “But Zoe . . .”

“Zoe's a minor, and even if she's off doing your Alchemist work, she's still legally under the care of her parents. Or parent. Your father intends to file for sole custody so that he can keep her where she is.” There was a long pause. “I plan to fight him. And if I win, I'll bring her back to live with me and see if she can live a normal life.”

I was stunned, unable to imagine the sort of battle she was proposing. “Does it have to be all or nothing? Can you guys share custody?”

“Sharing might as well be giving it to him. He'll wield the control, and I can't let him have her—mentally, that is. You're an adult. You can make your choices, and even if you're established on your path, you're different from her in the way you go about it. You're you, but she's more like . . .”

She didn't finish, but I already knew.
She's more like him.

“If I can get custody and bring her home, I'll send her to a regular school and maybe salvage some sort of ordinary teenage existence for her. If it's not too late. You probably hate me for that—for pulling her from your cause.”

“No,” I said swiftly. “I think . . . I think it's a great idea.”
If it's not too late.

I could hear her choke up a little and wondered if she was fighting tears. “We'll have to go to court. No one's going to bring up the Alchemists, not even me, but there's going to be a lot of discussion of suitability and character analysis. Zoe will testify . . . and so will you and Carly.”

And that's when I knew why she said this would be so difficult. “You guys will want us to choose one of you.”

“I'll want you to tell the truth,” she had said firmly. “I don't know what your father will want.”

I did. He would want me to slander my mom, to say she was unfit, just some homemaker who fixed cars on the side and couldn't possibly compare with a serious academic like him, who provided Zoe with all sorts of education and cultural experiences. He'd want me to do it for the good of the Alchemists. He'd want me to do it because he always got his way.

“I love and support whatever you feel is right.” The bravery in my mom's voice broke my heart. She was going to have more than family complications to deal with. Alchemist connections extended far and wide. Into the legal system? Very possibly. “I just wanted you to be prepared. I'm sure your father will want to speak to you too.”

“Yes,” I said grimly. “I'm sure he will. But what about right now? Are you okay?” Stepping away from Zoe, I had to acknowledge how life-altering this was for my mom. Maybe their marriage had become painful, but they'd been together for almost twenty-five years. Leaving something like that was a big adjustment, no matter the circumstances.

I could sense her smiling. “I'm fine. I'm staying with a friend of mine. And I took Cicero with me.”

Thinking of her spiriting our cat away made me laugh, in spite of the solemnity of the conversation. “At least you have company.”

She laughed as well, but there was a fragile quality to it. “And my friend needs some work done on her car, so we're all happy.”

“Well, I'm glad, but if there's anything you need, anything at all, money or—”

“Don't worry about me. Just take care of yourself—and Zoe. That's the most important thing right now.” She hesitated. “I haven't spoken to her lately . . . is she okay?”

Was she? I supposed it depended on how you defined “okay.” Zoe was thrilled that she was out learning the Alchemist trade at so young an age but arrogant and cold toward my friends—just like anyone else in our organization. That, and she was a constant, looming shadow over my love life.

“She's great,” I assured my mom.

“Good,” she said, her relief nearly palpable. “I'm glad you're with her. I don't know how she'll take this.”

“I'm sure she'll understand where you're coming from.”

It was a lie, of course, but there was no way I could tell my mom the truth: Zoe was going to fight her, kicking and screaming, every step of the way.

W
HETHER SHE GOT A PARENTAL PHONE CALL
of her own or simply had to deal with Zoe's shock, I knew Sydney would've found out about the divorce by the time I visited her in her sleep.

The few spirit users I knew could all heal pretty well, but none of them could walk dreams as adeptly as I could. It was nice to know I excelled at something, and surprisingly it involved a pretty low level of spirit—just a steady hum, rather than the burst that healing required. The downside was that unlike the person I visited, I wasn't actually asleep—more in a meditative state—so I could end up pretty exhausted if the dream took a while. Seeing as I wasn't that great a sleeper to begin with, I supposed it didn't make much difference.

I pulled Sydney into a dream around midnight, making the two of us materialize in one of her favorite places: the courtyard of the Getty Villa, a museum of ancient history out in Malibu. Immediately, she ran up to me, a frantic look in her eyes.

“Adrian—”

“I know,” I said, catching hold of her hands. “I was there when Zoe got the call.”

“Did she tell you the ugly details?”

I raised an eyebrow. “There's something uglier than a divorce?”

Sydney then proceeded to tell me about the bloodbath of a custody battle to come. While I could appreciate their mom wanting Zoe to have a semi-normal life, I had to admit to myself that my reasons for hoping their mom would win were pretty selfish. Zoe disappearing from Palm Springs would make things a hell of a lot easier for Sydney and me. But I knew Sydney's immediate concern was her family being torn apart, and my immediate concern was her happiness. One part of her story in particular caught my attention.

“You really think your dad might be able to work some Alchemist coercion with a judge?” I asked. I'd never thought of that, but it wasn't that far-fetched. The Alchemists could create new identities, get a group of dhampirs and Moroi into a private school on no notice, and cover up dead Strigoi in the press.

She shook her head and sat down on the fountain's edge. “I don't know. Maybe it's not needed if Zoe's adamant about wanting to be with Dad. I don't really know how these kinds of hearings work.”

“And what are you going to do?” I asked. “What will you say?”

She met my gaze levelly. “I'm not going to slander either of them, that's for sure. But as for what I'll advocate? It's hard to say. I'll have to think about it. I get my mom's view, and I even believe in it. But if I lean that way, Zoe'll hate me forever—not to mention the fallout with my dad and the Alchemists.” A small, bitter smile crossed her lips. “When I got back to our room tonight, Zoe didn't even ask me about my thoughts. She just assumed it was a done deal—that I'd take Dad's side.”

“When will it all go down?”

“Not right away. They haven't set a date yet.”

She fell silent, and I picked up on the vibe that maybe it was time to switch topics. “How'd the initiation go? Was there any naked dancing or animal sacrifice?”

Her smile warmed up. “Tea and hugs.”

She gave me a brief recap, and I couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Jackie loading up on wine. Sydney wouldn't tell me her secret name, though, no matter how much I tried to wheedle it out of her.

“I don't suppose it was Jetta?” I asked hopefully. Whenever I had to take on a fake name, I used Jet Steele because let's face it, that was pretty much as badass as you could get.

“No,” she laughed. “Definitely not.”

She then wanted to hear about my night, naturally worrying that no one got fed in her absence. We talked for a long time, and although it was hard not to be distracted by her perfect lips and the edge of her shirt's neckline, I found I liked having these dream conversations. I certainly didn't mind our afternoon make-out sessions, but I actually
had
originally fallen for Sydney because of her mind.

As usual, she was the responsible one who noticed the time. “Oh, Adrian. It's time for bed.”

I leaned toward her. “Is that an invitation?”

She lightly pushed me away. “You know what I mean. You're never in good shape when you're exhausted.” It was a polite way of saying that being worn out made me susceptible to spirit's attacks on my sanity, which I couldn't argue with. I could also tell from the uneasy look in her eyes that she wasn't thrilled about the use of spirit this dream involved either.

“Think you can get away tomorrow?” Weekends were always difficult because Zoe trailed her like a shadow.

“I don't know. I'll see what I can—oh, God.”

“What?”

She put a hand to her forehead and groaned. “Hopper. I left him at that witch's house. He was running around during the party, and I was so out of it after Mom called that I just walked right out the door with Ms. Terwilliger.”

I took hold of her hand and squeezed it. “Don't worry. He'll be fine. Wild night on the town, staying out with an older woman. Warms my heart.”

“So glad you're a proud dad. The problem is getting him home. I might be able to sneak out and see you later tomorrow, but I don't think I've got enough time to get out there. And I think Ms. Terwilliger's busy too.”

“Hey,” I said, feeling mildly indignant. “You just assume if you and Jackie can't do it, it's a lost cause? I'll go rescue him. If he wants to leave.”

She brightened. “That'd be great. But I thought you had your art project.”

It was such a small thing I was offering, no effort at all, really, and it warmed my heart to see how much it meant to her. Sydney was so often forced to be the responsible one who had to handle every single detail that I think it was an almost shocking surprise that someone might run an errand for her. “I'll have time afterward. She won't be freaked out about a vampire coming by, will she?”

“No. Just don't elaborate on your parental role.” She gave me a light kiss, but I craftily pulled her closer and made it a much, much longer one. When we finally broke away, we were both breathless.

“Good night, Adrian,” she said pointedly.

I took the hint, and the dream faded around us.

Back at my apartment, I indulged in my one daily drink, hoping it would send me to a quick slumber. No such luck. In the old days, it usually took at least three before I'd pass out in drunken oblivion. Now, my fingers lingered on the vodka bottle as I teetered on the edge of getting a refill. I missed it. Badly. Aside from the bliss of the buzz, alcohol could numb out spirit for a little while, and although the magic was a pleasant addiction, a reprieve from it was nice. Self-medicating had fended off a lot of spirit's negative effects for years, but this new deal was letting it start to gain ground.

A few more moments passed, and I pulled my hand back, clenching it into a fist. I retired to my bed, throwing myself onto it and burying my face in the pillow. It smelled faintly of jasmine and carnation from a perfume oil I'd recently gotten Sydney. She wasn't a perfume fan in general, claiming the chemicals and alcohol weren't healthy. But she couldn't argue against the pure, all-natural blend I'd found, especially when she'd heard the price. She was too pragmatic to let something like that go to waste.

I closed my eyes and wished she was with me—not even for sex, but just for the comfort of her presence. Considering the danger in our brief afternoons, a night together probably wasn't going to happen anytime soon, which was a damned shame. Surely I'd sleep better if I had her with me. It was frustrating because I really was exhausted in body, but my spinning mind refused to settle down.

I finally fell asleep an hour and a half later, only to be awakened by my alarm four hours after that. I stayed in bed, staring bleary-eyed at the ceiling, wondering if I could possibly cancel the meeting I'd set up with a classmate to work on a project. Seriously, what had I been thinking? Eight on a Saturday? Maybe I was closer to madness than I feared.

At least we were meeting in a coffee shop. Unlike my lovely soul mate, I had no restrictions on caffeine and ordered the biggest cup of drip they could manage. The barista assured me there was more where that came from. Across the room, my partner watched with amusement as I approached her table.

“Well, hey there, sunshine. Nice to see you all bright eyed and ready to start the day.”

I held up a warning hand as I sat down. “Stop right there. It's going to take at least another cup of this before you become charming and witty.”

She grinned. “Nah, I always am, day or night.”

Rowena Clark and I had met on the first day of our mixed media class. I'd sat down at her table and said, “Mind if I join you? Figure the best way to learn about art is to sit with a masterpiece.” Maybe I was in love, but I was still Adrian Ivashkov.

Rowena had fixed me with a flat look. “Let's get one thing straight. I can see through bullshit a mile away, and I like girls, not guys, so if you can't handle me telling you what's what, then you'd better take your one-liners and hair gel somewhere else. I don't go to this school to put up with pretty boys like you. I'm here to face dubious employment options with a painting degree and then go get a Guinness after class.”

I'd scooted my chair closer to the table. “You and I are going to get along just fine.”

And we had, enough so that we'd partnered up for a project on outdoor sculpture. We'd have to head over to campus to work on it soon but first needed to finalize the sketch we'd started in a pub after class earlier this week. I'd given up my bedtime drink to have a beer with her, and while it hadn't had much effect on me, Rowena had proven to be a total lightweight. Our sketch hadn't gotten very far.

“Up late partying?” she asked me now.

I took a long drink of the coffee, feeling only slightly guilty that Sydney would be salivating if she could see me. “Just up late.” I yawned. “Where are we at?”

She pulled out our sketch, which was on a bar napkin and read,
Insert sketch here.

“Hmm,” I said. “Promising start.”

After an hour of hashing out ideas, we decided to do a model of the monolith from
2001: A Space Odyssey
and then cover it with advertising slogans and internet lingo. I'd actually gotten bored during that movie, but Rowena was going off about how it was a symbol of advanced evolution and how our designs would be an ironic statement of where our society had ended up. Mostly I was on board because I thought it wouldn't involve too much effort. I was serious about my painting, but this was just a general required class.

A good chunk of our day was spent just getting the supplies. Rowena had borrowed a friend's pickup truck, and we went to a building-supply store in hopes of finding a large concrete rectangle for our monolith. We lucked out and even found some smaller blocks to put at the base of it.

“We can make a ring,” Rowena explained. She'd recently dyed her hair lavender and absentmindedly tucked wayward locks behind her ears as she spoke. “And then paint the various stages of evolution. Monkey, caveman, all the way up to some hipster texting on his cell phone.”

“We didn't evolve from monkeys,” I told her as we wrestled the rectangle onto a pallet. “The earliest human ancestor is called
Australopithecus
.” I wasn't entirely sure where vampire evolution fit in, but I certainly wasn't bringing that up.

Rowena released the block and stared in amazement. “How the hell do you know that?”

“Because I mentioned the monkey thing the other day, and my girlfriend had a, uh, few things to say about that.” A “few” things had actually turned into a one-hour lesson on anthropology.

Rowena laughed and lifted one of the smaller blocks. They were still pretty heavy but didn't require both of us. “I'd really like to meet this mythical girlfriend of yours, if only to see who in the world could put up with you. I could get Cassie, and we could all go out for a drink together.”

“She doesn't drink,” I said quickly. “And she's eighteen anyway. Well, almost nineteen.” With a start, I realized Sydney's birthday was fast approaching at the beginning of next month, February, and I didn't have anything for her. In fact, after my investment in vinyl, I didn't have much money at all until my dad's next deposit came in mid-month.

Rowena smirked. “Younger woman, huh?”

“Hey, it's legal.”

“I don't want to know about your sordid sex life.” She hoisted another block. “We'll go to Denny's or something. If you don't bring her around soon, I'll think you made her up.”

“I couldn't make her up if I tried,” I declared grandly. But inside, I couldn't help but feel a little wistful. I would've loved to go out on a double date with Rowena and her girlfriend. I was pretty sure Sydney would hit it off with her, if only to gang up and tease me mercilessly. But public appearances weren't an option, not unless we went for a night on the town with the Keepers.