The False Martyr (10 page)

“
Eia! Are you here?” Ipid
stood at the door and yelled. “I’m sorry for this morning. I’d love
it if you’d join me. . . . Thank you for the food. It looks
wonderful.” When he ran out of things to say and there was still no
response, he walked back though the door and down the
hall.

In his study, several
books had been removed from the shelves and scattered about the
room. The bottles of wine that he’d set next to the cellar door had
been toppled, at least a few of their number removed. Ipid thought
about what he’d seen. If Eia had consumed that entire bottle of
wine in the time since she’d left him, she would have to be falling
over drunk. It had only been a few hours, and she could not weigh a
hundred pounds.

Returning to the hall, he
walked toward the front of the manor and found the front door ajar.
There was no sign of Eia in the expanse of green on the other side.
Stomach rumbling and cramping, he returned to the dining room and
quickly ate several bites of the rabbit. He chewed quickly, stuffed
some tiny carrots into his mouth, and returned to the
gardens.

Down the path, he passed
exotic flowers, elaborately carved hedges, fruit trees just
beginning to hold their bounty, but no Eia.

He heard splashing. The
pond. At the back of the estate was a small, ornamental pond. Fifty
paces across and never deeper than a man’s shoulder, it was
surrounded by weeping willows, their fronds hanging around the
water like a curtain. The reeds and moss had been removed, leaving
hazy water with blooming lilies dotting its surface. Eia stood at
the pond’s edge, water rising to her waist, body naked. Back to
Ipid, she ran her hands up her body to her breasts then on to her
neck and through her water-soaked hair, but her eyes were locked on
the trees at the pond’s far end, staring at something . . . or
someone. Ipid heart skipped.
Who could
deserve such as this? Has she already found another object for her
affections?

Turning away from the
source of her attention, she dove back into the water. Ipid walked
cautiously down the path toward her, searching the trees. He had
not yet found anything when Eia rose from the water and began
walking directly toward him. Her naked body glistened. Water
dripped from every point, ran in a shower from the hair that reach
almost to her slim hips. Somehow, she did not seem to see Ipid,
though he was no more than ten paces from her. She looked back over
her shoulder, eyes still locked on the far bank, face a mask of
desire to match the invitation in her eyes.

Heart hammering, Ipid
followed her gaze and finally saw the source of her flirtation. It
was a boy. No more than twelve, he stood shirtless and dripping on
the far bank. His mouth hung open, body frozen by what he was
witnessing.

Ipid looked from the boy –
he did not recognize him – to Eia. She strode from the water, hips
swinging clumsily. “What are you doing?”

Eia jumped. Her attention
turned and she laughed. She looked back to be sure her audience had
not gone then approached. She walked slowly, seductively, hid
nothing, showed no shame. “Join me,” she said, words slurring. “I
want you.”

She grabbed his hand,
tried to bring it to her. Ipid jerked it away. “What are you doing?
There is a boy there. He’s not more than twelve.”

“
I know. He’s cute, isn’t
he? I don’t think he’s ever seen a woman naked. I get the best
reactions from him.”

“
Eia! He’s a boy. You
can’t . . . “

“
What?” Eia backed away,
nearly stumbling. “I haven’t hurt him. I let him look at me. I
didn’t touch him, he didn’t touch me. Tell me you wouldn’t have
sold your mother to have that opportunity when you were his
age.”

Ipid ignored her, refused
to give her the fight she clearly craved. Instead, he turned to the
boy. “You there,” he yelled and stepped around Eia to block her
from his view. “Are you alright? Do you need something to eat? Are
your parents still . . . ?”

That was as far as he got
before the boy was gone. As soon as Ipid emerged, his mesmerism
seemed to fail. His face filled with shock. He snatched his shirt
from the ground and ran. Ipid’s questions followed him, but there
was no response.

“
Are you happy?” Eia asked
from over his shoulder. Her hand wrapped around him. Her lips found
his ear. “Will you join me for a swim now?”

“
Can we go back to the
house?” Ipid pulled her back in front of him. She stumbled,
staggering in his arms, nearly fell. He caught her, but she
squirmed free and went to her knees. She began working the belt of
his pants. “Eia, stop! We’re in the middle of the garden. That boy
could be anywhere.”

“
Let him watch,” Eia
slurred. She fought his hands to get to his pants. “He might learn
something.”

“
No, Eia.” Ipid secured
her hands, held them away from him.

“
Is that all you can say?
Fine! We’ll go to your house. We’ll fuck in your bed like good
little boys and girls.” She stumbled to her feet, strode past him,
and swayed toward the house.

Ipid felt his emotions
swirl. He searched the area for the boy, wondered where he had come
from, wondered if he needed help, wondered what Eia’s display had
done to him. Not finding the lad, he took a deep breath and
followed Eia. She was obviously drunk, not thinking straight, but
to do that to a boy, to play with his emotions, to taunt him,
seemed cruel. There was clearly no point in addressing it now. Now,
he’d get her to bed. They’d discuss it when she was
sober.

#

An hour later, Ipid
returned to the dining room. He looked at the plate of food,
feeling ill. His stomach rumbled, but he was not sure if he could
get food past the guilt burning a hole in his chest.

Eia was finally asleep in
her own bed, but she had been so persistent, so relentless that he
had finally given in. He had known that it was wrong, that she was
too drunk to know what she wanted, but he could only resist so
long. There had been no love in it, no affection. And when they
finished, she had passed out, had left him feeling like the lowest
creature to walk the earth. He had sputtered his apologies, nearly
cried for having given her exactly what she wanted, and her eyes
had shuddered closed, her body had gone limp. His words had been
lost. His guilt, his weakness had remained unrepentant.

He chewed his cold lunch,
barely noticing the flavors. An emotional rollercoaster. He had
forgotten the way new relationships felt, the ups and downs, the
elation and uncertainty. It had been twenty-five years since he’d
courted Kira, since he’d hung on her every glance, lived for the
slightest brush of her lips. Even knowing her fondness for him,
even knowing that they would be joined, he had lived on the edge of
a knife. And despite his seeming age and wisdom, Eia was worse. She
was so unpredictable, so difficult, so demanding. It had barely
been a day, and she had him swimming in such circles that he could
no longer find the land, had him feeling just like the boy who’d
flirted with a village girl behind the wagons of the
caravan.
Yet that boy would have never
done what you just did.

Heart heavy, he walked to
his room. Eia was right, he was alone.

#

It was dark by the time
Ipid found his way to the dining room. Eia was waiting. She wore
another of Tethina’s dresses. This one was more conservative, with
high neckline and full sleeves. Yet the deep burgundy colored silk
brought out the blush of her pale cheeks and made her dark eyes
appear huge. She was lounged sideways in a straight-backed chair
with a book spread across her lap, bare feet dangling over the arm.
On the table before her were two crude plates and an array of
mismatched silverware – pieces that had not been worth taking.
Wooden cups held a dark liquid. An open bottle stood between
them.

As he entered, Eia jumped
slightly, slapped the book shut, and stood. “Hello,” she said and
brushed an errant strand of hair nervously over her ear to join
their pale fellows flowing down her back. Standing, it was clear
she had altered the dress. It conformed to her body, hugging
breasts and hips before falling into a pool at her feet. She was
beautiful. Ipid had been almost dreading see her again, had been
almost hoping that she would not be here, that he would not have to
face what had happened that afternoon. But now, seeing her, looking
into her dark eyes, watching her lips quirk into an uncertain
smile, he could not help but feel elation.

“
I . . . I am sorry,” Eia
said. She cast her eyes down. Her hands worked before her, picking
at each other nervously. “You are a good man. You deserve better.
Though I was drunk beyond all reason, I accept responsibility for
my choices. Among my people, we are more open about our bodies, and
about what we do with them, but it is wrong of me to force that
upon you, and even more so on that boy.”

“
Eia, it’s . . .
.”

“
No, let me finish. Part
of what my order taught is that one must take responsibility for
their choices. They are my choices. If they hurt others, then I
have shamed Hilaal. He gave me freewill, and I honor him by using
that gift to make choices that make his world better. I did not do
that today.” She paused and looked down at her hands where they
picked at one another.

Ipid wanted to go to her,
to relieve her of the burden of apologizing. He took a step
forward, drew the breath to speak.

“
I am not done,” Eia said
before he had a chance. “You will be happy to know that I found the
boy. He is with his family. His parents are thieves, looters. They
had stayed behind to pick through the abandoned houses. I
apologized to the boy, explained to him what he had seen. He was
confused but seemed to understand. I also spoke with his parents.
They had gathered a great deal of food. I traded with them and made
it clear that they should not come here.

“
And here again, I must
apologize. I stole a bracelet meant for your daughter-in-law. I
gave it to the boy’s parents in exchange for food, enough to get us
through the week. I hope you will agree that the food is more
valuable, but it was not my jewelry to take or to trade. If you’d
like, I will find a way to repay you.”

“
Eia, it doesn’t. . .
.”

“
Stop. I have one more
thing of which I am most ashamed.” She sighed, clenched her hands
to keep them from picking at each other, and seemed to steel
herself. “I did not respect your wishes. Many times you asked me to
stop. I did not. I forced myself on you, placed my own desires
above yours. It was wrong. I do not blame you if you hate me, if
you do not want to ever see me again. If that is the case . . .
.”

Ipid approached, grabbed
her arms. “Don’t be silly. I am just glad that you are not angry
with me. You were in no condition to know what you wanted. I should
have been strong enough to walk away. It is me that should be . . .
. You gave me exactly what I wanted. This may be the first time, a
woman has apologized for seducing a lonely old man.” He
laughed.

“
So you don’t hate me?”
Eia’s face lightened but the sorrow did not leave her eyes. “I know
I was awful. It is what happens when I drink too much. I should
never have started, but I thought you were rejecting me, that you
didn’t want me anymore.” A tear escaped her eye and drifted down
her cheek, leaving a glistening path.

Ipid wrapped his arms
around her. She felt so small and fragile, deflated from the
powerful creature he had always known. “Don’t be foolish. I am
sorry I pushed you away, but that was about me, not you. After last
night, I want to be with you all the time. You are the only thing
on my mind, and that scares me. It is all so much. Even without
everything else, I have not had a woman in my life, have not
allowed anyone close to me, in years. But more than anything, I am
worried. I feel like the entire world is resting on my shoulders. I
want to give myself to you, but there are so many things on my
mind, so many things fighting for my attention. It is not fair to
you, but I hope that you can understand.”

Eia sniffed, pulled
herself back from his arms and looked into his face, eyes
shimmering with water. She snuffled. “I will take whatever you can
give me. Thank you for being honest with me. I am afraid that I
have known many men who are not so kind, who take advantage of
women like me. It is my fear that caused this. I forced myself on
you because I thought if I did not, you would slip
away.”

Ipid laughed. He would
never have guessed to see this side of her, would not have even
considered that it existed, but now it seemed obvious. A beautiful
woman who gave herself so readily to men was destined to a life of
rejection, of warm beds growing cold once the morning light shone.
And Ipid had shown no sensitivity to her fears. That afternoon had,
in many ways, been as much his fault as hers. “I won’t slip away,”
he assured. “Even if I wanted to, I think you’d know where to find
me.”

He tried to laugh, but it
was cut short by Eia’s lips on his. He brushed away the tears from
her cheeks as he held her face, felt her, smelled her.

She pulled away after only
the briefest time. “Thank you. I am sorry to be such a mess.” She
wiped her tears away with a cloth napkin and took a deep breath. A
smile spread her cheeks. “Shall we eat?”