The Earth Conundrum: Book 1 of the Alliance Conflict (7 page)

Frank looked over at him in clear contempt. Figur was the Advranki Senator from Advranki 2. The man was a career politician. He could talk for hours it seemed about nothing. He was the type of person that started talking before their brain had decided what it wanted to say. However, Figur had an amazing speaking voice and people enjoyed listening to his endless prattle. Personally, Frank detested him.

Solear responded, “Well, it is a numbers game. As terrible as it sounds, the Hiriculans may be willing to sacrifice two Neto pilots to kill one Alliance pilot.

This brought an awkward silence to the room. Even Senator Figur was mysteriously silent. The Ceremonial Master stood and broke the silence by saying, “Let’s hear from Victor Bullpeep. He is one of the foremost authorities on humans.”

Victor walked to the podium and paid his respects to the Senators. Since he didn’t have a prepared speech, he simply asked, “What would you like to know about humans?”

Frank beat Senator Figur to the first question. He asked, “Will they eat us?”

Victor answered, “That may have been a bit of a misunderstanding on our part…”

He was about to continue when he got interrupted. Senator Figur said, “What about the incident 60 years ago when the humans ate an Altian that had crash landed on human world?”

Victor continued, “Earth. The name of their planet is Earth. As I was saying, when a human dies and the reason for his death is not immediately obvious, a specially trained physician cuts him open to see if he can determine the cause of death. Humans generally don’t eat their dead and I don’t think they ate the Altian pilot. I think they were trying to determine why he died.”

Victor had to stop at this point because his comment had started many shouts and side conversations. Finally, order was restored and Frank asked, “Really, humans cut open their dead just to see what’s inside? I am not sure if this is better or worse than eating Altians.” This caused the entire gallery to chortle. He noticed one person was beginning to sweat. He hoped he hadn’t overdone the humidity. He needed this session to conclude as quickly as possible.

Senator Korno, Frank’s rival, finally joined the conversation. “Okay, so if the humans don’t immediately kill and eat us, do you think they will be civil enough to actively participate in the Alliance Navy? Do you think they will listen to us, take orders from us, and not rebel?”

Crista fingered her neck and thought of a way to control the humans. Fortunately, she kept it to herself.

Victor thought for a moment before answering, “Probably. However, we would need to take several safeguards to ensure their compliance, like limit their access on the ship and possibly arm ourselves.”

Senator Korno said, “Do you think that humans can fly Alliance fighters at least as well as the Netos?”

Victor simply answered, “Yes. Probably better.”

Senator Figur must have felt the conversation had gone on long enough without his input, for he asked, “Well, which is worse, the enemy we know or the potential ally we don’t know?”

No one provided an answer, so it was time to vote. Each Senator pressed a button on their personal pad. The Ceremonial Master announced the results, 3 votes for the humans, 4 votes against. Everyone stared at the Ceremonial Master as he started checking to find the missing vote.

Frank stood up. It was time. He looked directly at Korno and said, “I haven’t voted yet. Unlike the other times we have discussed this bill, the information presented by our esteemed guests have made me believe that we need to act. If I vote yes, the bill will partially pass and need a sponsor. Korno, will you personally sponsor the bill?”

Korno immediately answered, “Yes. I will sponsor the bill.”

Frank said, “Then I vote yes. Let me say from this day forward that I am a champion of humans. Let us go together and inform the press.”

Super Figur interrupted, “Wait, how are we going to get the humans?”

Victor answered, “Well, most young humans enjoy playing video games. We could design a game that emulates the fighter training simulator. The game could be designed to make the pilot pass the final examination. We could also add on-line gaming modes. We will then take the 20 top scorers from the video game for the test program.” He neglected to mention that this wasn’t entirely his idea; it had been the plot of a human movie he had recently seen
⁵
.

Frank asked, “Can you do this?”

Victor answered, “No, I need help. I need someone to redesign the flight simulator to work on human technology. We also need marketing agreements, licensing agreements, patent rights, beam weapons, and a whole host of other things.”

Frank asked, “What do you really need?”

Victor answered, “I really need a technical genius to write the video game and design the necessary hardware interface. I would also need money to hire human law firms to handle all of the other business issues that arise.”

Frank said, “Lorano, could you do it?” This might turn into a wonderful day. Lorano was one of Korno’s fiercest supporters. Getting rid of Lorano for a few months would make Korno upset; and making Korno upset always made Frank happy.

Lorano answered dismissively, “Yes, of course I could reprogram the software. However, if we wanted to do it quickly, I could use help designing the corresponding hardware.”

Now it was Korno’s turn, “I have heard great things about Carank and you recently worked with him aboard the
Sunflower
. I am sure that he could assist you.”

Lorano responed, “Yes, together we could do it. But that doesn’t solve the money issue.”

Frank asked, “Do the humans still value precious metals like gold and silver?” Victor nodded affirmative and Frank added, “Then take a ton of gold with you
⁶
.”

⁶
A metric ton (1,000 kilograms) is worth approximately $38,000,000 USD.

All issues had been resolved and the Ceremonial Master adjourned to meeting. The senators headed down the secret passageway to the main Senate building. Frank had notified all of the major news networks and they were waiting on the steps of the building steps for the big announcement. The senators exited the passageway and met the press. There were over 100 journalists and television personalities. Each had brought a crew and their own set of cameras and lights – hot, bright lights.

The humid senators stood in front of the lights and nearly melted - well, their hair and makeup at least. Korno was especially affected; his hair was an utter mess! It was all up on one side of his head and looked terrible. The on-lookers started giggling at the appearance of the senators, but continued snapping pictures and filming.

Frank still looked terrific. The special hairspray had worked perfectly. He addressed the crowd and used his loud public speaking voice, “I am pleased to announce that a breakthrough has been made on the bill allowing another expedition to Earth to determine whether the humans are still (slight pause) antisocial.”

This brought a few chuckles from the crowd. Frank continued, “I would also like to say that I personally changed my vote and now consider myself a champion for humanity.”

One TV anchor shouted, “Senator Korno, any comments? It must have been a hair-raising discussion.” This brought even more laughter from the crowd.

Another one shouted, “Can you give us the details of the agreement? It appears this must have been a make-up session.” This brought still more laughter.

Senator Korno felt like he was going to cry. He and the other six senators quickly exited the press conference and retreated back into the Senate building. They raced to the restroom to try fix their appearances.

This left Frank all alone on the steps. He smiled to crowd, really enjoying the limelight. He stood just a little taller and said, “Next question please…”

Chapter 4

Captain Solear exited the Senate building and headed back to the spaceport. Arean was waiting for him at the dock with a shuttle. Arean, a former fighter pilot, still enjoyed occasionally flying when his duties permitted. Arean started the engines and requested permission to leave.

“Shuttle, this is Control. You are cleared to leave. Remember to use automatic guidance until you pass the outer edges of the planet.” The
Sunflower
was parked quite a way from the actual planet, so Arean would get a chance to disengage the automatic control system and actually fly the shuttle.

They landed on the
Sunflower
without fanfare. Arean located the flight deck maintenance worker and told him to check the shuttle. “I will be leaving shortly, so please get it ready for another flight.”

Arean and the Captain then proceeded to the bridge. They asked Ella, Clowy, and Carank to join them.

Captain Solear addressed them, “I have to ask all of you to swear to silence.”

They all nodded in agreement and captain Solear continued, “The Senate just secretly passed a bill to allow humans to join the fleet, at least on a trial basis.”

Clowy asked, “What bill?”

The captain responded, “The Senate bill to allow humans to join the fleet.” Lately, he had implemented a new a tactic for dealing with Clowy. He would simply repeat exactly what he had said the first time. He had noticed that quite often it worked. It did this time as she asked no further questions.

Ella was stunned. She asked, “How are we going to keep the humans from eating us?”

Solear responded, “Good question. It hasn’t been determined yet. However, there is some new research that shows that humans don’t actually eat other races.”

Carank responded, “Well, who is going to be the first to test that theory?”

After the laughter subsided, Captain Solear thought that was an excellent segue to the next topic. He looked directly at Carank and said, “Carank, I am afraid I already know that answer.”

Carank said, “What?”

Captain Solear continued, “Carank, I am proud to announce that you have completed your shipboard military training. Effective immediately, you are now a navy scientist and have been transferred to fleet research and development. Further, you have been given a new assignment of utmost importance.”

Carank said, “What?” (Perhaps he had been around Clowy too long.) He had only been on active duty for three months and had really only been on one three week voyage. He had heard of others getting promoted early from their training, but this was an extreme case.

Captain Solear continued, “Carank, everyone realizes your incredible potential. You have earned this promotion. Enjoy it.”

Carank responded, “Okay, so what is my new assignment?”

Captain Solear continued, “You, and a small team, are going to go to Earth, design a test to evaluate potential human fighter pilots, recruit 20 of them, and return with them to Advranki. The Captain handed Carank a copy of his signed orders. He then said, “It has been a pleasure having you aboard. I took great pride in signing your transfer orders. Good luck.”

He then said, “Clowy, please register the transfer in the computer and place a formal request for a new weapons officer.” He had tried to make the order as unambiguous as possible and hoped the orders would be understood without issue.

Nope. Clowy asked, “Who signed the orders?”

1…2…3…The captain hadn’t quite reached 10 when Arean simply stated, “All transfer orders have to be signed by the captain. It doesn’t matter who initiated them.”

Carank packed his belongings, said farewell to his fellow shipmates, and boarded the shuttle. Arean flew him down to the planet and landed on the pad next to the
Vista
. Arean pointed at the mini-freighter and said, “Again, Good luck. That mini-freighter is the ship you will be taking to Earth.”

Carank exited the shuttle and started walking to the mini-freighter. He was joined by Lorano, who was also walking to the freighter. “Wow,” he thought, two months stuck on a mini-freighter with Lorano and humans. He was starting to doubt the circumstances of his rapid promotion.

Lorano and Carank walked the short distance to the
Vista
. Crista had opened the hull door and was waiting for them at the top of the walkway. Lorano approached and said, “Hi human.”

Crista had had plenty of time to think of clever response to this taunt. However, she had spent her time doing things other than thinking of snappy comebacks. So instead, she balled her fingers into fists and punched Lorano straight in the gut with her left. She followed that with a right hook that hit him straight in the jaw and sent him tumbling back down the runway.

Carank had never been accused of being a slow learner. He bent and picked up Lorano and said, “Hello, my name is Carank. We would be honored if you let us board your ship.”

The event apparently forgotten, Crista turned and left the passageway, allowing them to enter the ship. The two geniuses entered the ship and proceeded across the hallway to the flight control section of the ship. They met Victor there. He was performing a pre-flight system check.

Lorano said, “Hello Victor, this is Carank. What is wrong with your wife? She just hit me for no reason!”

Victor didn’t look up. He just casually responded, “Oh, she’s crazy.”

Crazy. Carank wasn’t sure he understood. He said, “Computer, give possible translations of the word crazy in Alliance basic.”

…97.9% Wild, uncontrollable.

96.4% Mentally unstable

94.2% Insane, a lunatic…

Carank looked at Victor and said, “So, you are saying she is a little wild?”

“No,” Victor replied, “She is mentally unstable, or possibly insane. I had her tested, but the results were inconclusive.”

Carank asked, “How can you live with someone who is crazy?”

Victor replied, “Well, we are still in the honeymoon phase. It really hasn’t been an issue so far. She can be rather nice.”

“Um, aren’t you just a little scared of her?” Lorano asked.

“Nope, she couldn’t hurt me if her life depended on it.” Victor replied. He explained the concept of the bark collar that humans use to control their pets and how he had one made for Crista to ensure that she doesn’t hurt him.

Carank took several moments to process this. Finally, he said, “Do humans really shock their pets?”