The Drifting (10 page)

Cessa looks
my way showing
her fangs
and
growling as if angry with me instead of
my kidnapper
.  I swallow hard, but even that doesn’t stop my heart from beating wildly.  I have forgotten that the beautiful beast I’ve come to love is a
predator
by nature.

“Yes, I know,” remarks Sema
to Cessa
as she gently puts
Cessa
down.  The old woman t
urns to face me, her face angry.
“You
wi
ll never call Cess
a when angry with an innocent!
”

Taking a deep breath, Sema finds control and sits back in her seat.  I’m still standing
as I
watch
Cessa find
the
shadow
s
near
the cooking area and disappear
.  I can feel her here, just hiding within the shadows and still seething with anger.  What have I done? 

Confused by what just happen
ed
, I move away from the table and try to head for the sleeping area when I find Ziri in my path.  I try to step around him, but he blocks my way until I
’m
staring
at
his chest.  I
get what Sema said
,
but
I’ve made Cessa angry with me.  Without the others here, I had believed that
I
at least had her.  That doesn’t seem to be the case anymore. 

“I’m sorry.”  His voice is deep, but the sincerity of his apology forces me to look up at him.  With an effort
,
I hold
my emotions at bay, remaining
quiet
and
just
stare
at him.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you so far.  And I’m sorry for this.”  He lifts my wrist and turns it to show the small woun
d from the prick earlier.  “And
for her,” he indicates toward the shadows.  “I know what it’s like to be taken away from everything you know and have no control of what’s going on around you.  I’d like to start over.  My name is Ziri.”  He lifts his
large
hand
,
palm facing up.  I look at it curiously
,
then he says, “Isn’t this how you greet each other in your realm?”

I choke out a small laugh, shaking my head.  I take his hand and face it sideways so that I can place my hand into his and give him a handshake.  Giving into the moment, Ziri shakes my hand
enthusiastically,
almost jerking my arm off. 
He
returns my laugh with one of his own
before turning
me around by
my shoulders and leads
me back to my chair
.  He
slightly
pushes
me down to sit
and
I look
up
to find Sema once again smiling at me.

“I
’m sorry
.  I shouldn’t have yelled the way I did.  Of course, Cessa wouldn’t have killed Ziri, but they could have maimed each other
beyond healing
.”  I look down at my hands still trembling and not sure what to say. 

“What Tharin should have told you
,” she continues,
“is
that you are bound to the cat emotionally as well as mentally.  She will feed off your anger and once released
,
she will attack wh
oever it is you’re focused on.
Cessa is very much in tune with Tharin.  He is marked permanently with her likeness
, as
you
will be
in about a month or so. 
But
she is only just learning how you feel, how you react.  Your emotions are very raw, so her reactions to someone as untrained as you are very
primitive
.  It’s extremely important that your mind and intentions are clear when you call her forth.”

I look after the shadows wanting very much to go to Cessa and apologize.  Sema catches me and says, “Let her cool down, Lily.  You’ll have plenty of time to make things right with her.”

Again I nod.  I look over at Ziri as he cleans up the mess from Cessa’s leap across the table.  Sema continues when Ziri finally sits back down with another full plate in front of him.  “You should know why
we took you
the way he did
. 
Tharin would never have agree
d
to let us take you into our protection.  And there was just no time to convince him.  So, we did what we had to.”

I take a drink before saying, “You could have just come to me and asked.”

“I wonder,” replies Sema thoughtfully, “would you have come?  Would you have left Tharin’s side willingly after developing feelings for him?”

I’m about to swallow
my second gulp of water when the shock of Sema knowing my feelings almost chokes me.  Coughing, I stare back at her, “Wha…?  What do you mean develop feelings for him?  Yeah, sure, I mean
,
I like him as a friend…” I stop talking
, noticing
the looks on
their
faces.  They don’t believe a word I’m saying.  Can I blame them?  Even I don’t believe a word I’m saying.  I sigh heavily, shrugging my shoulder at them
as I
pick up my fork and start
eating
again.

“It’s
all right
, Lily,”
assures
Ziri as he turns his attention back to his plate, “every girl in Tharin’s court
falls head over heals for him and only
‘likes him as a friend
.
’”  As he says this
,
he stabs at a
piece of
chicken as if stabbing at Tharin.  He catches me looking at him curiously and he shrugs his own shoulder back at me.  He continues to eat in silence.

I stab at my own chicken, answering, “Well,
Tharin brought me here to marry me for his people’s sake and because of a treaty
.  But
I’m here to find Lucas and take him home.”
 

Both Ziri and Sema become still, eyes on me. 
I look
from one to the other wondering what
I
said wrong this time.  Ziri looks over at Sema, then grabs his plate and walks out of the room without a word.  I stare after him confused.  I look back at Sema and find her searching my face intently.

“What do you know of your brother, Lily?” she asks leaning back in her chair, her plate of pasta forgotten.

I put my fork down. 
“I know four years ago he disappeared and he was taken by an assassin group call the Ange.  I know he tried to become king to the Willow Clan
,
but the clan’s throne refused him.  I know he’s been possessed by some being, some ‘evil one’ that has forced him to do unspeakable things.” I think of Tharin’s sister E’leiana
.  I shake the thought and
continue, “I know he’s not what everyone here believes him to be.  My brother would never hurt anyone, especially me.”

“Why?” she asks
quietly
,
demanding
an answer.

I give her an incredulous look
.
“What do you mean ‘why’? Because I know Lucas, he would never hurt me.  He practically raised me.  That wasn’t my brother that night, it just wasn’t.”

Undaunted by my
denial
, she calmly asks, “And?”

I sit back bewildered.  “And nothing, that’s it.  I just want to find my brother and take him home, there’s nothing else to it.  What do you want me to say?  That…that I came for,” Tharin’s face pops in my
mind
and I
brush
his image aside, “…for…for what?  I do
n’t know what you’re getting at.
”

I can
feel myself getting angry, worse
it feels as if Sema is seeing right through me and seeing more than even I know or want to know.  “Come now, Lily.  You can’t be that
naive
?”
She
leans forward, “
W
hat you remember of your brother
is
that of a young girl.  He was missing from your life for four years.  In all the years he was gone, not once, not at any
time did he reach out to you.”

“How could he
?  H
e was taken over by some evil
guy.
”
I want to sound offended, but there is truth in Sema’s words.  I want to believe that something or someone else was keeping Lucas from coming for me.

“
You are right
, Lily.  Lucas was possessed
b
y a demon
named
Falsad, but Falsad did not
have complete
control of Lucas
all the time
.  Before then, Lucas knew what he was doing and he wante
d to be king of the Willow Clan, even if it meant having you out of the picture.
”

I shake my head at her denying
her words
, “No.”

“Then why didn’t he come for you, Lily
? 
For four years he knew you suffered
because of
his disappearance
.  He
didn’t bother to
calm your fears or
put you
at ease
…to let you know he was all right
.”

“He was trying to protect me, to keep me safe,” I answer
desperately
.

“I’m sorry, Lily.  We don’t have time for this dance
,
and there is much more at stake here than Lucas.  So, I will tell you now how things stand where he is concern
ed
.”

I sit quietly
, afraid to move
. 
Deep down I kno
w what she’s about to tell me, but something in me refuses to believe it
…can’t believe, won’t believe it
.  And even though kn
owing this, when she finally says
it, it hit
s
me like a ton of bricks.