The Disappeared (20 page)

‘It’s a little boy’s shrap,’ she says, trying to snatch it off me.

‘No. It’s a rec. A bit old-fashioned, but definitely a rec.’

‘A what?’

‘Do you like it?’ Marn says. He grins from ear to ear.

‘I do like it,’ I say. ‘And if we’re lucky, it’s going to be very useful for the reading lessons. Come with me.’

I lead Kay and Marn down to the salon, which fortunately is empty. I head over to the Info screen. I press the rec to the corner of the screen and it holds in place as I knew it would. The screen flicks to an image of the Peace Day parade.

Marn widens his eyes. He’s never seen anything on screen without the Info logo plastered across it.

Kay looks at me. ‘I’ll shut the door,’ she says.

We manage to get our hands on five recs. Marn says there used to be more in a box at the back of the cupboard in the salon, but the little ones fought over them for their shrap collections. We ask all the kids, but I’m sure some of them keep them hidden away because they can’t bear to part with them.

Four of the recs are of The Leader. It seems that some time back they thought that the students at the Academy needed to hear what The Leader had to say, even if he does use a broad vocabulary. I wonder when they changed their minds about that. The fifth rec is an ‘instructive’ film about leaving the Academy and going to work in a factory.

Ilex is disappointed when we show him a bit of one of The Leader’s speeches.

‘It’s like the Info,’ he says. ‘All The Leader smiling and moving his hands. I’ve seen it lots.’

‘You might have seen it.’ I say. ‘But you haven’t heard it. Listen.’

Ilex tilts his head and screws up his face in concentration.

‘
A leadership must arise in which every citizen can have confidence.
’

‘He talks the talk like you,’ Ilex says.

For a moment I’m flattered by the idea that I sound like The Leader, then I remember we’ve got to stay focused and careful. I take the rec off the screen. ‘Most people talk like that,’ I say. ‘You’ll talk like that soon. And these recs will help us because you can watch them to learn the words.’

‘Let’s watch more,’ Kay says.

‘Wait a minute,’ I say. ‘We need to make sure that no one who might get us into trouble sees us.’

Kay pouts. ‘I hate all this careful-ing. I want to do it now.’

‘I know but—’

‘No people ever said no watching The Leader,’ she says. ‘We didn’t steal them. They were here in the salon. It’s not a wrong thing.’

Somehow I don’t think that’s how Rice would see it.

In the end we decide to watch the recs early in the morning before breakfast. Most Specials stay in bed as long as possible, which means the salon is usually deserted at that time. Even so, we position a look-out on the door and another halfway down the corridor to let us know when someone is coming.

For the first early-morning viewing there are twenty of us in the salon. I wanted fewer because I was afraid that we might be missed from the dormitories. But Kay insisted. The reading groups are the largest they’ve ever been and a lot of Specials want to see the recs.

‘I think we should watch a bit and then you can ask me about any words you don’t understand,’ I say to everyone before we start.

‘And me,’ Kay adds. ‘You can ask me too. I know lots of words now.’

I put the first rec on the corner of the screen. Music plays and the camera pans across a vast crowd of excited people waving Leadership flags, to The Leader on stage. Under his suit he’s wearing a shirt with a big, old-fashioned collar.

‘I’ve seen this one,’ I say. ‘It’s when he first became Leader.’

‘
Fellow citizens, I am here today to give you a message of hope. I know that the conflict has brought hardships to us all, but now it is necessary to put behind us the hostilities of the past and to focus on the challenges of the present.
’

I pause it. ‘Hope is believing – ah, thinking – that things can get better.’

‘What’s “conflict”?’ Ilex says.

‘He means the war. This is not long after the Long War finished.’

‘Why doesn’t he say “war”? Then people know,’ he says.

‘I expect he thinks “conflict” sounds better, or, at least, less awful,’ I say.

‘People still died,’ Kay says. She taps the play icon.

‘
The people have spoken and we have listened.
’ He points into the crowd. ‘
You have shown us that you desire to rely on a moral framework. Without it we have not got a society at all, we have chaos. You have asked for discipline and direction under leadership. And we will give it to you.
’

I pause again. Marn is scowling. ‘Why does he say “you”?’ he says. ‘Is he you-ing to me? How does he know I’m here?’

‘He’s talking to everybody, all people.’ I say.

‘Not me.’ Marn shakes his head. ‘He doesn’t know me.’

I laugh. ‘When he talks about “discipline”—’

‘That’s hitting and shocks,’ a boy from my dormitory says.

‘Not always,’ I say. ‘It means being firm, keeping rules, making sure that people do the right thing.’

‘I want to listen,’ Kay says. ‘You can tell us words later.’ She presses play.

‘
The problems of our country stem from individuals. Individuals who refuse to give of their time and talents to help rebuild our society. They have lost sight of the fact that it is only through hard work that we find dignity and self-respect. I ask you to stop thinking only of yourselves and of individual gain and instead to stand together. Alone we are nothing, as part of a prosperous society we are everything.

‘
The time for shirking is over. It is essential that we set about ensuring that every citizen is fully employed. No longer will the common man avoid hard labour; no longer will our young people drop out of education. Instead they will learn the rewards of a job well done. I urge you all to invest in our country, knowing that the success of our nation will ensure the success of every citizen.

‘
Our path is clear; it is of paramount importance that we all recognise our duties, duties that I know you will shoulder gladly to help rebuild our proud nation. Our task is to bring about full employment. Our task is to provide all our children with an appropriate level of education. Our task is to repair our society. In your hands, more than in mine, lies the power to bring us to new heights. I ask you to put your hands, your hearts and your minds to our task. Together I know we will succeed.
’

There’s a roar of applause from the crowd. I pluck the rec off the screen and pocket it for safe keeping.

‘What does “necessary” mean?’ Kay asks. She’s used the pen I gave her to write words on her palm.

‘You’d better remember to wash that off,’ I say to her. There would be all kinds of trouble if an enforcer spotted writing on her hand. ‘“Necessary” means something that has to be done.’

‘What about “essential”?’

‘It’s the same thing.’

Marn wriggles in front of Kay. ‘And “para . . . paramount ’portance”?’

‘That’s kind of the same too.’

Why does he keep saying the same thing
? signs Ali.

‘He’s trying to emphasise the point – that means he wants it to be really clear,’ I say. ‘He wants people to listen to him.’

‘By going on and on?’ Ilex says.

I shake my head. I don’t think they’ve enjoyed their first political speech.

‘All of that section, that bit, is to tell people that they must contribute – that means they must give something, to society,’ I say.

They stare at me. It’s really hard to take some of The Leader’s fine ideas and reduce them down to something simple. Once you take the descriptive words away they seem to mean less. I screw my mouth up. ‘What he means is . . . What he’s really saying is that everyone should give something to help.’

‘That’s nice,’ Marn says. ‘What do you give?’

I want to say: you give what you can, or what you’re best at, but Kay’s face frowning in concentration catches my eye and I realise that she’s not going to be allowed to give of her talents. She’s not even allowed to have talents.

‘I suppose you give what they tell you to give,’ I say eventually.

Kay looks up. ‘The Leader’s saying: do what I say.’

Sounds like an enforcer
, signs Ali.

I pick out a few more words from the speech and write them using string to shape the letters. We talk about what they mean and practise using them in sentences. When the group breaks up I feel strangely deflated.

Is it better to say things all different ways?
signs Ali when most of the other Specials have gone to the feeding pods for breakfast.

‘The Leader is trying to get his point across by saying it lots of ways,’ I tell her.

‘I like it,’ Marn says. ‘I like all those words.’

Kay tugs at a strand of her hair. ‘It’s good if you want to sound like you know all things.’

Ali taps me on the arm.
But is it better than saying one thing? I think he should say the one thing he means,
she signs.

‘Don’t be a no-ranker, Ali,’ Ilex says. ‘That would sound big bad. That would be like . . .’ He walks across the room pretending to be The Leader, grinning like an idiot and grabbing our hands to shake. He climbs on a chair. ‘Oh my feller cit’zuns,’ he says.

Kay bursts out laughing.

‘I have a big thing to say. Not lots of things. One thing.’ He smiles broadly and widens his eyes. ‘DO WHAT I SAY!’

The others are clutching their sides.

But maybe Ilex is right. And if he is, it’s really not that funny.

As I head from the salon to the dining hall for breakfast, a crowd of girls from one of our reading groups catches up with me. They want to bring some friends to their next class.

‘That’s great,’ I say. ‘The more people the better.’

Ahead of us, just outside the hall, I spot Rex staring at us and frowning.

‘Let’s talk about it later,’ I whisper. Then I say in a louder voice, ‘I hope they’ve prepared something nutritious for breakfast. You lot will need your strength if you’ve got to look at Rice’s ugly face all morning.’

The girls laugh.

Rex steps forward and blocks my way.

‘Go,’ he says to the rest of the group. They dart off to their pods. One of them gives me a sympathetic look.

Rex stares down at me. ‘The girls are liking all that brainer talk,’ he says.

I know it’s a bad idea to get into a conversation with Rex, but I can’t help myself. ‘It’s nice to think that some of the Specials appreciate intellect,’ I say. ‘Don’t worry, Rex, the girls who get tired out by thinking still prefer you.’

He glowers at me. He clearly doesn’t understand what I’ve said. I’m expecting him to blow up and lash out, but instead he snorts.

‘You think you know all,’ he says. ‘But you don’t. A brainer will never be bigger than Rex. You need to learn it.’

He gives me a sharp jab in the ribs and I double over. He laughs. ‘You’re going to learn it, brainer-boy.’ He nods to himself as if he’s decisively gained the upper hand. ‘You’re going to learn it,’ he repeats.

He swaggers off and I’m left with a sinking feeling that he’s got a plan to teach me a lesson.

It doesn’t come as a surprise when, later on, Deon grabs me in the corridor and tells me that I’m on the list to fight on Friday. I’ve managed to get away without fighting since my first night here, so this is obviously Rex’s way of showing me that he’s in charge. He’s so childish.

‘I don’t see why I have to go,’ I say to Kay and Ilex. ‘We’re leaving soon. What can the Reds do to me?’

Kay raises her eyebrows.

Ilex’s mouth is agape. ‘Blake, there’s big lots of things that they can do. Big lots of things that hurt.’

I suppose it wouldn’t take long for the Reds to do some serious damage to me. Even so, I can’t help whining. I should have kept my big mouth shut when Rex was getting jealous.

‘You need to do it,’ Ilex insists. ‘If you want to be escaping, you can’t be getting Rex and the Reds all angry and watching you.’

‘I know. I just hate Fight Night.’

‘Don’t be scared,’ Kay says. ‘I can help you. I’ll teach you some good fighting. You can be a good-fighting Special.’

‘I’m not a Special and I’m not going to be here much longer. Learning Community students don’t need to fight.’

Kay fixes her eyes on me and I realise that last time we had a conversation like this, I was the one trying to persuade her to learn something new. She smiles. ‘Everybody needs to learn to fight.’

From the moment I wake up on Friday, my stomach is a gurgling whirl of nerves. I was lucky last time I had to fight. Kay helped by tripping up Deon and Rex stopped the fight before I got completely pounded. Both Kay and Ilex have tried to teach me some fighting skills in the last few days, but Ilex has told me about Fight Nights where Specials have ended up with broken arms and bitten-off fingers. We’re getting so close to leaving and I’d really like to take all my body parts with me.

By the time evening comes, I’m a wreck. Kay, Ilex and Ali bombard me with last-minute advice as we walk to the drum-shaped room.

‘Let them hit you then it will end more fast,’ Ilex says.