The Dead of Winter (Seasons of Jefferson: Book 2) (42 page)

All goes well down at Ski Patrol. There are no signs of hypothermia, and my parents have arrived to pick us up. I tuck Avery under my arm as we trudge our way down the walk to Dad’s waiting truck. I feel her trembling beside me. She’s been quiet since my parents met us at the lodge. I can tell she’s nervous about what they think of her. She said it herself, “I’m Pistol’s sister. This will never work.” As we load our stuff into the back of the truck, my mom finally speaks.

“Get inside, sweetie. I’ll take care of the stuff. You’re probably still freezing from being up there in the cold for so long.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Woodley.” She nods her head and jumps in the back seat.

My sister and I get in on each side of her, sandwiching her in the middle. T puts her arm around Tangles, pulling her in for a hug. “I’m glad you’re okay, Avery. So did you and my brother get a chance to talk? I know he was awfully torn up about how he treated you.”

I know my sister is trying to help me out right now, but I really want to move past this. “T, I love you, but can we not talk about this right now?”

“It’s okay, Caden.” Tangle’s turns toward my sister. “Yes, we worked it out, but there’s still something I needed to show him. I’m glad you’re here. I want you to see it too.” Avery starts stirring around in her pack and pulls out a small spiral notebook.

“What is it?”

“It was my brother’s. They brought it back in his box of stuff the other night.”

“Brought it back? Where was it?”

“It was at the rehab center. He was going there, right before the accident.”

The thought of Pistol Black in rehab doesn’t make sense to me. I have to question Tangles to make sure I heard her right. “What? He was in rehab?”

“Yes. He checked himself into Sacred Heart in October. After the night he came home bleeding.”

“October?” I question.

The doors to the truck swing closed, giving the pages of my mind, a chance to turn back to fall.
October, our birthday.

As the truck engine starts up, Avery continues on. Her voice lowers, and Kaitlyn and I huddle in closer to listen. “Yeah. One night in late October, he stumbled through the door. It was obvious he’d been drinking again. Only this time, he was hurt. His head was gushing blood. He was muttering. Incoherent. None of us could understand him. We thought he was going to die. My dad went crazy. He’d had enough. Mom fought him off. She wouldn’t let him take my brother down to the police station. Let’s just say it wasn’t a good night. The next morning when he woke up, I went in his room. He was crying. Talking about how he hurt you … again. That’s when he decided to get help. Fix himself. He said this time it was too close.”

Kaitlyn brings her hand to her mouth. I see the shock on her face. I watch her struggle, and know she’s remembering the horrific attack in the barn. A tear rolls down the side of her cheek. I listen as Avery tries to comfort her.

“I’m sorry, Kaitlyn. I’m so sorry I brought it up. I thought I could make you feel better if you knew how sorry he was. If you knew he was getting help because of you.”

Kaitlyn looks down, shaking her head. “Getting help? It didn’t do much good.”

“What do you mean? He stayed there for weeks, making sure he got sober.”

“Well, he wasn’t sober the night he came after us on the mountain. He left the bottle of Jack Daniels in the truck to prove it.”

Avery shakes her head. Her disbelieving expression almost looks painful. “That doesn’t make sense. He wouldn’t have started again. He was doing this for you. It’s the only way he figured he could make it up to you. He was going to go see you, to apologize, as soon as he finished his program. He wanted you to know that you’re the reason he got help. We talked the night before he went missing.”

The night before? But the night before I assumed he was down at the Forks. What with the accident and all.
A vision of my sister running from the cabin the night of
truth or dare
crosses my mind.
So it wasn’t him in creepy cabin after all.

“I know him, Avery.” My sister continues. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad about who your brother was, but yes, it does make sense. When he drank he went crazy. He didn’t think straight.”

Avery shakes her head in denial. “No.” She continues to shake her head. “Read this. You’ll see. There’s no way he started back up. Look.” She holds her phone light to the journal.

We begin reading through Pistol’s entries. How he struggled during the first few days in rehab. About the withdrawals. The anger. The hurt. And how torn up he was over what he’d done to my sister. He hated himself. He couldn’t live with it. And then, the tone of the entries begins to change. I can see that in the last few entries he’s sober. He’s found clarity. Avery turns the page. It’s the last entry.

“See, I told you. He loved you. I don’t think he would’ve started drinking again. It just doesn’t make sense.”

I study the words over and over, trying to make sense of where his mind was, and why he would’ve driven down there the way he did. If he loved my sister so much, why did he come after us? As I hold the light of the phone up to the words, I notice faint letters bleeding through.

“Wait, it looks like these two pages are stuck together.” I rub the corner back and forth, until the pages begin to separate. Then carefully, I peel them apart.

“Oh, wow, there’s more. I didn’t see this one.” Shock is evident in Avery’s voice.

I hold my breath as I look up at my sister. Her eyes are wide with fear.

“Caden, oh my God.”

“Screwed up accent? I thought it was just an innocent crush.”

Kaitlyn’s jaw drops.

“Who is it? What’s wrong?” Avery questions.

My heart stops cold.
Pistol Black was trying to protect us.
Turning toward my sister, the only words that escape my mouth are, “Oh my God, he’s wasn’t after you. He was after Jenna.”

The End

A Message from the Authors

When we first started writing
When Fall Breaks
, our dream was to write books as gifts for our own children. However, as the stories came to life, a message started to form. We realized, being teachers that we witness difficult situations that our students face every day. It is our hope that reading our stories will help teens make connections and seek help from professionals when needed.

Our first story,
When Fall Breaks
, dealt with underage drinking and substance abuse. Our message at the end of that story provided The Pathway Program as an available resource for help. We’d like to offer that information again. If you know of a young person who may need help, The Pathway Program is available by both phone and via the internet. You can call and talk to a representative Toll Free at 1-877-921-4050 or visit them on the web at
www.thepathwayprogram.com
. If you are a teen and find yourself struggling with drinking or substance abuse, please reach out to a parent, school counselor, teacher, youth pastor, or friend. As teachers, we are always open to help our students get the help they need. It doesn’t matter if you were a former student, current student, or didn’t even have us as a teacher. We care about all of you.

A second issue we addressed in
When Fall Breaks
was how teens and young adults struggle with domestic violence. This can happen to people of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender. Sometimes it starts out subtly and intensifies without the victim realizing how bad it has become. If friends are warning you that they see signs of control, verbal, or physical abuse, please listen. Many abusers are masters at manipulating their victims and making them feel like THEY are the reason for the incident. It’s NEVER okay. It is NOT your fault. If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, there is confidential support out there 24/7. Please visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline at
http://www.thehotline.org
. Teens can go to www.loveisrespect.org, or call 1-866-331-9474, to speak with someone privately. It’s a confidential online resource available to help young adults prevent and end abusive relationships.

As a follow up to the severe incident that occurred in our first story,
The Dead of Winter
focused on an issue that is extremely serious and often ignored. It is called Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This disorder is a mental health condition that's triggered by terrifying events. Some people have either experienced or witnessed catastrophes that may cause them to have flashbacks, nightmares and/or severe anxiety. The teen characters in
The Dead of Winter
lived through such traumatic events and did not receive the attention needed right away. Please do not ignore the symptoms of Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. Get help if you are having a severe reaction such as nervousness, fear, and even guilt after experiencing a traumatic event. If you believe you are experiencing PTSD, reach out to a professional. They can help you restore a sense of control in your life. Post-traumatic Stress Disorder can happen at any age. You are not alone. Please visit the National Center for Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (NCPTSD) at
http://www.ptsd.va.gov
or call (802)296-5132. It is a confidential online resource available to help adults of any age.