The Cowboy's Baby Bond (9 page)

Johnny's gentle, calm look crossed several barriers in her mind. “Maybe the question is, will you trust Him even when things seem dark and despairing?”

She turned away. “Trust doesn't come easy for some of us.”

“Maybe it's only natural for a child like this.”

She brought her gaze back to Adam. He trusted her completely even when she bathed him in cold water to ease a fever, even when she didn't feed him his usual meals, made him ride in a rough wagon for days at a time and required that he wait while she prepared his food.

I make him wait
. The words circled in her brain. Not because she didn't love him, but for necessary reasons, such as the food being too hot.

And yet he trusted her.

She shook her head. She couldn't deal with this subject right now. “We have to find Celia and Sarah.”

“Then let's start looking.”

They returned to the wagon, tucked Adam into his little nest and left the main street to drive up and down the side streets.

Johnny stopped the wagon often. Willow called their names and together they stared into yards and alleys and listened.

Nothing.

“It's getting dark,” Johnny finally pointed out, as if she might have missed that fact.

She bit back a protest. They couldn't quit looking. She had to find her sisters.

Johnny touched the back of her hand, sending a jolt through her body. “Let's go see if the sheriff is back.”

Willow's insides shriveled. A sheriff meant disaster. “A sheriff came to tell us when my parents were killed. And when my husband died. Going to the sheriff is like saying we think they are—” She choked and couldn't continue.

“We need help and he's the best person to ask. I pray he's back now.”

“Did you pray or is that just a saying?” She might not be willing to trust God herself, but she didn't mind riding the coattails of another's trust.

Johnny stopped the wagon and took her hands. He bowed his head. “Father of all creation and all knowledge, please lead us to the girls. Teach Willow to trust You.” He paused for a beat of silence and Willow wondered if he waited for God to speak to him or maybe her. She heard nothing, but couldn't find it in her heart to be annoyed at Johnny's prayer on her behalf.

He continued, “And please keep them safe until we find them. Amen.”

“Amen.”
Please, God. Please, God
. She wouldn't even add
if You care
. She wanted His help either way.

Johnny turned back to driving the wagon and in a few minutes they pulled to a halt before the sheriff's office. “No light,” he observed. “Doesn't look like he's back.” Nevertheless he jumped down and threw open the door. “Sheriff?” he called.

There was no answer, though neither of them expected one.

Willow looked up and down the street again, hoping, praying, wishing to see Celia and Sarah. A dog trotted by and disappeared into an alley. Other than that, nothing. “Now what?”

“It's almost dark.”

A rider approached and stopped beside the wagon. “Can I help you folks?” A silver star flashed on his leather vest.

“I hope so, Sheriff,” Willow answered in a rush. “I'm looking for my sisters. Celia and Sarah. They're ten and fourteen.”

“I know the girls you mean. They came to me last night, all in a fright. Seems a couple of men had been bothering them.” The lawman rode around the wagon to face Willow. “I took them to my brother's ranch, where they'll be safe.”

She clung to the edge of the seat, almost too weak to hold herself upright.

Johnny jumped up beside her. “Tell us where to go and we'll get them.”

“It's a fair ride to the north and the trail is too narrow to find after dark. Best you spend the night here and go out in the morning.” He gave them directions.

“I don't want to wait,” Willow protested.

“Ma'am, they're safe. You'd be wise to be safe, too.”

“I say we go at first light,” Johnny said, but he waited, as if he meant to give her time to come to her own decision. His glance back at Adam convinced her.

“Very well.” She had no wish to put her son in danger.

Once they returned to the hotel, Johnny got down and reached for her.

She shook her head. “I'm loath to do this.”

He took her hand, drew her forward and helped her down, but didn't release her even when her feet were solidly on the ground. “I promise we'll leave at dawn and we'll get your sisters. Then I'll see you all safely to your new home.”

She clung to his hand, his eyes and his promise. “Dawn?”

“I'll be here.”

“Thank you.” For so many things. Bringing her here, staying with her, offering comfort and encouragement.

“I wouldn't have it any other way.”

Had he read on her face the many things she meant? “Your conscience. Right?”

“I have to live up to my own expectations.”

His words were a cold reminder. He had very high standards, which would not allow an exception for a young woman who permitted herself to be used by a man the way Willow had.

She took the drowsy baby and Johnny followed with their bags. He carried them upstairs to her assigned room and waited until the door closed behind them before his boot steps echoed down the hall. She leaned against the closed door, Adam's head resting on her shoulder. How would Johnny view the fact that she'd sold herself to Bertie in exchange for a name for her baby and a home for her sisters? How would he react to the fact that she'd gone into marriage carrying another man's baby?

She would never find out because she couldn't tell him. Ever. And there was no point in wishing otherwise. As she prepared Adam for the night, her nerves jumped as if she'd drunk too much coffee. Her sisters were safe. Maybe she could trust God just a little. Maybe He hadn't completely turned His back on her for her many sins.

Although she ached all over, both inside and out, she didn't immediately go to bed. Instead, she stood in the darkened room looking out the window. What a strange, strange day it had been, yet through it all, Johnny had never complained, never criticized her. He'd been like a rock.

She smiled. It would be great to have a rock-solid man in her life.

If only she could go back and do things over... But then she wouldn't have Adam, and she had no regrets about him.

Her only shame was over her own sinful actions.

But tomorrow she'd be reunited with her sisters. They'd return to Granite Creek and become a family. The sooner she went to bed, the sooner dawn would come. She lay down with no expectation of sleep.

Thoughts raced through her head, till the last one hit:
Too bad this adventure will soon be over
. She meant to correct the silly notion, but blessed, blissful sleep claimed her before she could.

Chapter Nine

B
y the time the sky turned the translucent gray of dawn, Johnny had the wagon ready and ambled up the deserted street to the hotel. He stopped and watched the door. Willow would be anxious to be on her way and would come flying out at any moment.

He waited. And waited. Had she overslept? Should he go inside?

She'd been through so much yesterday that he could understand if exhaustion had overcome her. He made up his mind. She needed sleep. He leaned back and propped his feet against the front board, prepared to be patient as long as necessary. It gave him time to think.

When had he ever talked so freely about his faith as he had with her? Saying the words aloud served to solidify what he believed. The plain, simple truth was God cared about him. And He cared about Willow.
Please, Father God, let her see that and trust You. Help her settle in at Granite Creek and have a happy home
. He almost added
and
help me be welcome in her home
, but not only would it be a selfish prayer, it was premature in every way. She hadn't yet come to terms with the recent loss of her husband. Johnny saw that in the way her eyes flared with awareness and then darkened with guilt.

Besides, he hadn't forgotten he and Thad would be living miles from town. A trip to civilization would be a rare occurrence.

A woman scurried past him on the street, quickly and purposefully, her hand shielding her face. She looked like a woman with a secret.

His thoughts hardened into rock. The stranger had reminded him of a lesson he'd best remember. He knew better than to give his trust to anyone until it was tested and proved.

The hotel door flew open and Willow rushed out, her hair flying, the baby's clothes awry. A porter carried her two valises and Johnny jumped down to take them and stow them in the wagon.

He faced Willow, a grin teasing his mouth. “'Morning.”

“I overslept. You should have wakened me.” Her look was pure annoyance.

His grin spread, claiming his mouth and his eyes. “Guess you needed your sleep.”

“Need to get to my sisters more'n I need to lie in bed half the morning.” She handed Adam to him. “Let's get moving.”

“Have you eaten?”

She scowled a silent reply.

“Has Adam had something?” He turned to the boy in his arms. “Are you hungry?'

Adam nodded, his eyes trusting Johnny to take care of his needs.

“I was going to give him a biscuit from the grub box.” Willow sighed. “Now you've made me feel guilty and neglectful.”

“There's an easy remedy for that.” Johnny took her hand and drew her after him.

She followed easily and, if he wasn't mistaken, pressed close to his side.

His smile went clear to the bottom of his heart as he led her into the café.

A bouncing gray-haired woman greeted them. “Welcome back,” she told Willow. “Have you found your sisters?”

Willow said she had and explained where they were. “We're going to get them as soon as we've had breakfast.”

“Sit wherever you like and I'll have your meals out in a jiffy.” The woman hustled to the kitchen.

Johnny led Willow to a table next to a window.

She perched on the edge of the chair, obviously refusing to relax and enjoy this necessary delay. He wished he could ease her tension.

He sat opposite her and held Adam on his knee. “Your mama's in a frightful hurry. Can't blame her. It's been a while since she's seen her sisters. They'll be equally anxious to see her and meet you.”

Adam chuckled.

“You're anxious to meet them, too? Why don't you ask your mama what to expect?” Maybe it would help Willow relax if she talked.

“Mama.”

Willow jerked her gaze from the window to her son. “He'll have to wait and see for himself. Besides, I could say they're eight inches tall and purple and he'd be just as happy.”

Johnny widened his eyes and pretended to be shocked. “Purple? Really? Both of them or just one? Which one?”

She finally relaxed enough to laugh, bringing a pleased smile to his lips.

“Celia has hair about the color of mine.”

“Is it as flyaway?” Whoops. He shouldn't have said that.

Willow's hand went to her hair and she smoothed it. Pink blossomed in her cheeks. “I was in rather a rush this morning.”

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” He decided against telling her he liked the way her hair fluttered about her face.

The café lady bustled back with plates piled with eggs, fried potatoes and crisp side bacon. His mouth watered. He hadn't eaten a decent meal in more than a day.

Adam reached for the plate and babbled excitedly.

“Shall I say grace?” Johnny asked, as Willow grabbed her fork and looked ready to attack her food.

“By all means.” Her eyes told him to make it short.

“Bless the bread. Bless the meat. Bless the food we're about to eat. Amen.” He knew his eyes flashed with amusement.

She quirked her eyebrows, the only acknowledgment she'd give him that she understood the quick prayer was on her behalf.

“Shall I take Adam?” she asked.

He considered it for half a second. Feeding the baby might slow her down enough for Johnny to get in a good feed. “You'll do a better job than me.” He transferred Adam to her knees, brushed his hand over the little boy's head and tried to ignore the sudden emptiness of his arms.

How foolish. He had no claim on this child. Or this woman.

Nor did he desire one.

He turned his attention to his food and tried to remember why he'd decided against marriage.

Trudy, he reminded himself. Trudy and her dishonesty.

But it was more than that. He'd seen the uncertainty of a future. Look at what had happened to his ma. And Thad's sister.

But if no one took a chance on love, there would not be families like his and Thad's. What sort of risks and challenges had Big Sam faced when he married Seena?

But his parents' situation was different, though Johnny couldn't explain how.

He cleaned his plate at the same time that Willow scraped up the last mouthful and fed it to Adam. She pushed herself to her feet. “Let's go.”

Johnny paid the bill and followed her out. She already sat on the wagon seat.

He trotted over and climbed aboard, to release the brake and flick the reins. “We're on our way.”

She stared straight ahead as they navigated out of town into the open country. The flat, treeless land made him miss the hills and groves of home.

A huge sigh escaped her lips and she slowly leaned back. “I can hardly believe I am finally going to see them.” A beat of silence passed as he waited for her to continue. “The first thing I'm going to do is demand to know who was bothering them.” She paused again. “No, the first thing I'm going to do is hug them and let them hold Adam.” Her laugh carried a lot of tension. “I hope they'll like him.”

Her worries startled him. “What's not to like?”

Her eyes met his, silently asking for more reassurance.

“He's sweet and good-natured and has the softest hair. Like the down of a baby duckling.” Johnny stroked Adam's head.

Willow's gaze remained on his, searching, exploring, hungry for something he could not identify.

He didn't blink or glance away, but let her take her time, even though her look went deep into his heart and mind. He didn't object. He had nothing to hide. What she saw was exactly what he was—a man of simple needs. A man with high standards.

An idea broke free and floated to the surface. Was he also a man with impossible expectations?

What was so impossible about expecting truth and trust? Seemed to him those were the cornerstones of any relationship.

He ended the moment and turned his eyes forward.

She shifted. “Last time I saw Celia she was almost as tall as me and strong. She's always been strong for a girl. She was a bit reckless.” Willow's voice trailed off. “Things could have changed. I know I've changed a lot, mostly in ways you can't see.”

Johnny waited. Would she explain?

“I used to be more trusting. More open. Maybe a little more than I should have been. I thought people would always do what was right. I thought a person's word was his bond. I learned otherwise.” She exhaled a burst of air, then continued brightly, “But that's okay. I'm stronger for these lessons and I'll know better than to repeat them.”

He wanted to argue, to say some people could be trusted. But he understood her caution. Even shared it. “Experience is a harsh but wise teacher.”

“Indeed. I've not told you about Sarah.”

“She's the purple one?”

“No.” Willow laughed. “But she is—or was—short. I was almost ten when she was born and I claimed her as my baby. I carried her everywhere. I taught her baby games like pat-a-cake. I loved her like my own.” He could see her swallow. “I miss them both so much.”

“You'll soon be seeing them again.”

She pressed her cheek to Adam's head and smiled. “I can hardly wait.”

“That should be the place over there.” He pointed to the left and turned off the trail.

Willow leaned forward so far that he caught her shoulder and pulled her back. Seemed he was always catching her from going too far. He smiled at the thought.

As they approached the buildings, two figures watched them. Both females. One was as tall as a grown woman, the other much shorter.

“It's them. Celia, Sarah!” Willow called.

The one who would be Celia grabbed the other by the hand and raced away.

* * *

Willow's heart clung to the back of her throat. Why were her sisters running from her? Perhaps they didn't recognize her.

Or maybe they'd seen Johnny and feared it was one of the men who'd bothered them.

“Stop,” she called. If they heard they never slowed.

She grabbed Johnny's arm. “Stop the wagon.”

“Whoa.”

She handed Adam to him.

The wheels had barely ceased turning before she caught up her skirts to keep from tripping on them and jumped to the ground. She found her balance and ran after her sisters.

“Celia, Sarah, wait. It's me. Willow. Stop.”

Sarah slowed and tugged on Celia's arm, but her sister yanked her forward.

“Celia, stop.” Willow put a dose of authority into her voice.

Sarah finally pulled her sister to a halt. “It's okay. It's Willow.”

The two had a little tug-of-war, slowing them enough for Willow to catch up. “Celia, it's me. I've come for you.”

Celia dropped Sarah's hand and backed away, her expression dark. She was either angry or afraid—perhaps both.

Willow would deal with that later. For now, she opened her arms and welcomed Sarah into a hug. Tears dampened her eyes.

She would never get enough of holding her baby sister close, but shifted her to one side and reached for Celia.

Celia shook her head and looked toward Johnny. “Who's he?”

“His name is Johnny Harding, and when he understood I needed to find you, he kindly brought me.”

Celia continued to scowl at Johnny, who waited patiently a hundred yards away, Adam perched on his knee.

“Girls, you can trust Johnny. Come meet him and your nephew.”

“Is that who he's holding?” Sarah asked.

“It is.” Willow drew them both forward.

As they approached the wagon, Celia's scowl deepened. “The baby doesn't look like Bertie,” she said. “That's a good thing in my opinion.”

In Willow's, too, but she would never admit that he had no reason to. Revealing her secret would cause her to lose whatever respect they might have for her. How, then, could she expect to create a family? Even more important, how could she ensure they wouldn't accidently blurt out the truth to others? “I think Adam looks like our father, especially when he smiles.”

Johnny got down from the wagon to greet them, but Sarah clung to Willow's side and Celia hung back.

“Johnny, these are my sisters, Celia and Sarah.”

Johnny smiled. “Pleased to finally meet you.”

Neither replied.

Willow took Adam from Johnny. “And this is your nephew. Adam, say hello to your aunt Celia and aunt Sarah.”

The toddler grinned and babbled something.

Sarah waved. “Hi, Adam.”

Adam waved back.

“He's sweet.”

Willow knew Adam had won Sarah's heart, and turned him toward Celia.

He waved his arms at her and when she backed away, Adam looked puzzled, then rubbed his cheek on Willow's shoulder. It would take time, but he would win his auntie over. No one could resist his sweet nature.

A man and woman had stepped from the house to watch and now came to join them, so introductions were again made.

“You're the girls' sister, then?” the man asked.

“I am.”

“I'm happy to deliver them safely to your keeping.”

“Thank you for taking care of them,” Willow said.

“We can take care of ourselves,” Celia muttered. Her attitude hurt Willow, but she was certain things would improve after they settled. The sooner the better.

“Girls, do you have anything to get or can we leave?”

The rancher handed over the girls' traveling bags.

“I'm ready.” Sarah jumped into the back of the wagon and sat on the canvas-covered mattress.

Celia didn't move, her expression thunderous.

Johnny gave Willow a questioning look.

She shrugged, uncertain how to persuade Celia to cooperate.

“I'll help you up.” Johnny took Adam and held out a hand to assist Willow.

She sought his gaze, knowing her hurt and confusion would fill her eyes. This was not turning out the way she'd expected their reunion would go.

His soft, encouraging smile lifted her heart. Things would work out, he seemed to say, and she allowed herself to believe him.