The Cowboy Lassos a Bride (Cowboys of Chance Creek) (17 page)

T
he drive to
DelMonaco’s seemed to take longer than usual, but once she was seated in a booth across from Jake in the noisy restaurant, their menus in front of them, Hannah relaxed a little. As he scanned his menu she found herself watching his hands. The way he held the laminated rectangle of plastic. The way he fiddled with his silverware. He had square palms and long, blunt fingers. And she knew from experience exactly how they could make her feel.

A little shiver coursed through her.

“Are you cold?” Jake asked. She hadn’t thought he was paying her any attention.

“No, I’m fine. What are you having?”

“Manicotti.” He tossed the menu down. “You?”

“Chicken parmesan.” She cast about for something else to say. “Thanks for asking me here. It’s a nice change.”

“Figured you could use a break.” He bent forward. “The way you’ve worked so hard to keep the cabin straight and the way you’ve been cooking—it means the world to me.”

She couldn’t meet his eyes. “You know I won’t be able to do that when I go to school, right?”

He set his menu down. “You’re still planning to go to school?”

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Even if you’re pregnant?” He lowered his voice, although the din in the restaurant would cover anything they said.

“Especially if I’m pregnant,” she said. “Look. I know you want a traditional wife, but you’re not getting one in me. Not by a long shot. You either have to give up that notion or you have to give me up.”

Sarah-Jane Lafferty, a casual acquaintance of Hannah’s, approached the table, notepad in hand. “You two ready to order?” she asked cheerfully. She looked from one to the other of them with frank interest and Hannah decided to move things along before she started asking any embarrassing questions. It was bad enough the Matheson clan seemed to think it their right to discuss her relationship with Jake. She didn’t need Sarah-Jane gossiping about it to other patrons of the restaurant.

“Sure thing. I’ll have the chicken parmesan, Jake wants the manicotti and we both want the side salad with house dressing.” Jake’s eyebrows shot up, but he didn’t contradict her.

“How about to drink?”

“A beer for Jake, just water for me.”

“Perfect. I’ll bring you some garlic bread in a minute.” Sarah-Jane headed back for the kitchen.

Jake’s eyebrows were still raised. “I guess you’re right; you’re not going to be traditional.” He took her hand and tugged on it gently. “You do know the man is supposed to order the meal, don’t you?”

“Whatever.”

“Look, it’s all right with me if you want to be a vet. I’ve thought about this a lot. I would like it if you joined me in my work on the ranch, but it’s not necessary. More than anything I want you to be happy. If being a vet is what makes you happy, then so be it. The only thing I want is for you to commit to me—to commit to us. Let’s make a plan for our lives together—a plan we’re both happy with.”

She sat back, surprised by his change of heart, and for one moment she wanted to leap across the table and hug him. But then she took in all of his words and began to shake her head slowly. She appreciated what he was saying, but it didn’t go far enough. “You don’t get it. I already have a plan and there isn’t anything I can change about it. First I’ll go to Montana State, then I’ll go to Colorado, and then I’ll come back and join Bella’s practice.”

“Wait. Hold up there. Colorado? Why the hell would you go there?”

She almost pitied the handsome cowboy. This was exactly what she’d feared—he could make adjustments to his life-view, but only small ones. “Jake,” she said, her voice softening. “You realize I can’t do a veterinary degree at Montana State, right? I’m just doing my preliminary classes there. The nearest veterinary program is in Colorado. I’ll be there for four years.”

“Four years?”
Jake couldn’t breathe, his chest had gone so tight. He leaned across the table. “You can’t go away for four years.”

“That’s what it takes to be a vet.”

He sat back, stunned. All his dreams went up in smoke. Hannah wasn’t going to yoke up with him—two partners working side by side toward the same vision. She was so committed to her own dreams she’d leave him high and dry for four entire years. And what about their child?

“You can’t leave if you’re pregnant.”

“Watch me.”

“Are you serious?” He stared at her in disbelief. How could she sit there so calmly and tear his heart out of his chest? “That’s my kid, too.”

“If there is one.” She looked exasperated. “I didn’t ask to be pregnant—not right now. I’ve told you the truth since day one. I have plans. I know what I want from life.”

“Guess it’s not me.” He fished in his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box. Thumped it on the table. “I asked you here to give you this. I wanted to make our engagement official.” He opened it and held it out to her. The classic diamond ring inside it glittered in the low light of the restaurant.

Sarah-Jane, who’d just approached to place a basket of rolls on the table, veered quickly away.

“Put that back
in your pocket,” Hannah hissed at him. “You’re such a hypocrite. Two minutes ago you said you supported my desire to be a veterinarian, but the second you find out it will take some personal sacrifice you change your mind. At the same time you want me to commit to
you
and
your
life plan? I don’t think so.”

“I didn’t know being a vet would mean you had to move away for four years. That’s a pretty big deal,” Jake protested.

“Exactly my point. We can’t be together, Jake. We’re totally incompatible.”

“That’s bullshit. We’re compatible every night.”

Hannah rolled her eyes. “Sex isn’t everything.”

“It’s a hell of a lot, though.” He took her hand again. “Every night you can’t get enough of me and every day you’re so angry you look like you want to spit. Why does it have to be like that?”

“Why?” Tears of frustration pricked her eyelids. Why did it have to be like that? Because of Holt. Because of the Mathesons’ archaic beliefs. “Because none of this is real!”

“What?” Jake scowled. “What are you talking about?”

“This… situation.” Hannah waved a hand. “You and me together. We didn’t meet and date the normal way—your father forced us together!”

The color drained out of Jake’s face. “What do you mean by that?”

Damn—if she blew her cover, she’d lose everything she’d worked for. Gladys would lose her home. But she couldn’t stop now that she’d started. She was too angry with Holt. Too angry with herself.

“For one thing, I’m talking about the way your father has been forcing me to cook and clean like some household slave—that’s not normal, Jake!”

“Wait… what?”

“He threatened to kill Gladys if I didn’t do it. You think I like doing all the housework for you after a full day at the clinic? I have news for you. I hate cleaning. I hate shopping, and I hate, hate, hate laundry.”

“My father threatened to—”

“To kill Gladys. To eat her, actually. Because that’s the only way he could get me to do for you what your mother does for him—to be the kind of stay-at-home wife you want me to be.”

“I just told you I’m okay with you having a career—”

“And that’s only half of it.” She talked right over him.

“What do you mean?” Jake looked wary.

“He used the same threat to make me sleep with you.” She stood up. “There. I’ve said it. I’m done here. I’m done with all of this. You can tell your father to shove his threats. I’ll move Gladys by the end of the week.” She turned to go.

Jake gripped her wrist. “Sit down. Now.”

The steel in his voice stopped her cold. She’d never seen Jake so angry. For the first time since she’d known him she felt a tendril of fear curl through her gut. His grip was so tight she couldn’t budge. If she tried to pull away from him now, she’d make a scene in the crowded restaurant. As it was, several heads had turned their way.

Hannah sat.

“Let me get
this straight.” Jake felt disembodied from his own voice. Surely this couldn’t be him in this restaurant, hearing these words from Hannah. He couldn’t be the one shaking with anger as he thought about what Holt had done. “My father told you he’d kill Gladys and eat her if you didn’t sleep with me?” He shouldn’t have been surprised that Holt would play Hannah the same way he’d played him, but he was.

She nodded.

“Just like that. Straight out—no hinting?”

“He said it clear as day.”

“He told you to sleep with me,” Jake repeated, unable to believe it.

Hannah squirmed. “He said I had to spend fourteen nights with you. In the same bed. What we did there was up to us.”

“And you did it. You went along with it.” Jake ran his free hand through his hair. The other he kept locked around Hannah’s wrist. “Did you hate every minute of it?” His voice was rough.

“Of course not! You don’t understand—”

“You’re damned right I don’t understand. Was that really your only option? Prostitute yourself to save your animal? Really?”

His cruel words stung her and she blinked against the tears that filled her eyes. “Jake—”

He leaned across the table toward her. “You know, I couldn’t figure out why day after day you cleaned my house and cooked for me. It didn’t make sense, because it so obviously bothered you. You felt those chores were beneath you but you did them anyway. I thought…” He scraped a hand over his face. “Well, you know what I thought and you set me straight. But I never—
never
—guessed that you would sleep with me because my father forced you to.” His jaw tightened. “You don’t give a damn about me, do you? That was my father’s hand again. Forcing you to live with me. Forcing you to make my house a home. Forcing you to fuck—”

She slapped him. “Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare say one more word.”

The restaurant went quiet, but Hannah only had eyes for him. She was just as furious as he was.

“It’s true, isn’t it?” The slap stung, but he didn’t care.

“No, it’s not. Holt pushed me into moving in with you, but I was interested long before that.”

“Why should I believe you?”

“Because of how it felt when you fucked me.”

She had pitched
her voice low but she still heard a startled gasp from the nearby diners. She didn’t care. They were finally getting to the heart of the matter, and she wanted to put all her cards on the table. Everything she had said was true; Holt had pushed them together in an unnatural way, but despite all of it she wanted Jake desperately.

Jake sat back. Watched her through eyes that were hard and cold. “I don’t know what to say to you. I can’t believe my father. I know he wants me to get married, but to do this…?”

“Believe me, I feel exactly like you do. His behavior is so far out of bounds it’s unbelievable. I’d be the last one to defend him, but I think I know why he did it. Do you realize what a lonely life your father has had?” She hoped she could bridge the chasm that had opened up between them. She was losing him. Had lost him, maybe. He thought she’d only been with him because she’d been forced, and that wasn’t true—it had never been true. A proud man like Jake wouldn’t care about nuances, though. If he thought she’d lied to him, he’d turn his back on her.

He scowled. “Lonely? How do you figure that? He’s got four kids.”

“Now he does. But he was an only child growing up. Sounds to me like he might have had it hard. He wants to be surrounded by family. He wants you all to marry and have children. It’s important to him.”

“Important enough to threaten you?”

She shook her head, desperate to make him understand. “You know, looking back, I think your Dad was smart enough to know it wouldn’t take much to nudge me into your arms… and your bed.” Color crept up into her cheeks. “We’re good together, but the problem is we’re not right for each other. Or it’s not the right time for us to be together. I don’t know.”

Jake straightened. Surveyed her, his fingers still tight around her wrist. She could tell he was thinking it all over. Weighing her words and the truth of them. “If you think we’re good together, then we should be able to make this work.” His grip tightened. “You should be able to marry me.”

He wasn’t getting it. “We want different things…”

“There’s nothing we can’t solve once we’re married.”

Hannah shook her head. “Really? You’ll adapt to the time I need to spend away from you? You’ll support my career? Because that’s non-negotiable. I am going to veterinary school.”

“I won’t stop you from going to veterinary school,” he said slowly. “I don’t have anything against you going.”

“Do you have anything for it?”

Jake narrowed his eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means there’s a hell of a big difference between not stopping me and actually helping me,” she said. “If we’re going to make a life together, I’ll need your support. It’s hard enough to do what I’m about to do without having someone close by who doesn’t want me to do it.”

“All right.” She could tell he was trying to calm down. Around them, diners got back to their meals, although people were keeping an eye on them. “Why don’t you tell me about it? Tell me why you want to be a vet so bad. What all that school is going to look like.”

“You really want to know?” She was suspicious of his intentions.

“I really want to know.”

“I want to be a vet because I love working with animals. I’ve told you all I do at the clinic, giving shots and stitching up wounds and all kinds of things. I’m good at it; I’ve got steady hands and a strong stomach. I could do so much more, I know it, and Chance Creek could use another vet. We’re desperately short handed; you know that as well as I do.”

“All this school. How will you pay for it?”

Hannah looked down. Jake tugged her hand.

“Answer the question.”

“I talked to Bella about it the other day,” she said. “And she made me an offer.”

“What kind of offer?” His tone went hard.

“She offered to fund my schooling, since I got her on the show that made her a millionaire. Billionaire,” she corrected herself. “I didn’t want any money—I certainly didn’t expect it. She won it fair and square, you know? But she wants to even things out a bit, so she’s going to pay for it. All of it. I’ll keep working part-time with her through the next semester and during the summers, too, just to keep my hand in the business, but I can pick when to take my classes and I’ll have so much more time for studying. And when I head to Colorado, I won’t have to work at all. That will make it so much easier!”