The Cowboy and the Cossack (Nancy Pearl's Book Lust Rediscoveries) (24 page)

Like Old Keats said, it sure wouldn’t be easy, but their idea shaped up to be pretty simple. We were still playing showdown or chess or whatever. And we had to put on an absolutely fearless front without accidentally causing Khabarovsk or our far-off hidden meadow to become a battleground. Because with or without one of Rostov’s “Pyrrhic” victories, we’d sure as hell finally lose.

From off on one of the high points, there were now a couple of rifle shots. We looked in that direction, and a minute later Ilya galloped down to speak excitedly to Rostov. Rostov then sent him back where he’d been on lookout, slapping his pony on the rump to speed him on his way. Turning to us he said, “Some of Verushki’s men had circled and were coming in from the far south side to examine our camp. They didn’t make it.”

“The two shots?” Shad asked.

“They wounded one man and shot another’s horse out from under him.”

“That,” Old Keats said dryly, “is really nifty.”

Shad nodded. “It is. An’ this is the time, right
now
on top a’ that, t’ send our men in just like we planned, big as brass an’ twice as shiny.”

“Yes,” Rostov agreed. “But after the incident this morning, today will be an even more difficult time.” He paused. “My four men will be Lieutenant Bruk, Kirdyaga, Vody and Yakov.”

Rostov moved back to speak to his men and Shad thought hard for a moment. Volunteers were suddenly out, and he was considering which of us he would send.

At last Shad said, “The four of us who are goin’ are Old Keats, Big Yawn, Shiny an’ Link.”

The other three, without a word one way or the other, started to get ready. But Shiny just stood without moving, staring down at the ground.

“Well?” Shad said.

Shiny cleared his throat slightly and looked up at Shad. “They been hangin’ our friends an’ we just shot one a’ them. Maybe dead, maybe not.” He hesitated. “An’ now, with all that
trouble goin’ on, some a’ us cowboys an’ some cossacks’re supposed t’ ride into that town big as life.”

Shad didn’t answer, waiting for him to go on.

“I hate t’ remind ya’ about this again”—Shiny frowned—“but me an’ Link ain’t exactly typical.”

“Nobody said ya’ were,” Shad told him flatly. “Get mounted.”

As Shiny moved resentfully off, it occurred to me that Yawn wasn’t exactly typical either. He was by far the biggest man in our outfit, like Kirdyaga was among the cossacks. And it further occurred to me that next to Sergeant Nick, Vody and Yakov were the biggest and toughest-looking men among them. So Rostov had chosen the three roughest, most spine-chilling customers in his whole outfit to go into town with Bruk on this particular day.

Shad and Rostov were both stacking their small going-into-town decks with the largest, meanest-looking, most untypical men they had. And in favor of Shad’s decision making, Shiny and Link were not only Negro, but both of them topped six feet and weighed in at a long way over two hundred pounds. In addition, if you didn’t know them, and therefore know how gentle they really were, they just happened to look as fierce as wet wildcats.

The four men now led up their horses, and Shiny said quietly, “Me an’ Link goin’ ’cause we’re niggers?”

“Partly,” Shad said.

“Hell, boss!” Shiny grumbled as he and the others swung up on their horses. “You’re gettin’ rid a’ your fuckin’ misfits!”

“Who you callin’ a misfit?” Big Yawn growled.

But right then Shad had already grabbed the bit on Shiny’s mare Ginger, so that she wasn’t about to move without getting her jaw broken. And the funny thing was that as he did this he wasn’t even mad so much as he was kind of saddened. Holding Ginger motionless he said quietly, “Ya’ feel that way, get off. I’ll send somebody else.”

But Shiny wasn’t yet quite ready to get down. He sat in the saddle, frowning vaguely, as though he had a feeling he’d done something wrong but didn’t know exactly what.

Keats, who had mounted to lead the others off, turned and spoke with more anger than I’d ever heard in his voice before.
“Shiny!”

Every eye there jerked around to him, and he went on as hard as before, every word slamming against Shiny like a clenched fist. “You think Shad’d send you ’cause you’re a
nigger
? Who went night b’fore last?”

Shiny’s gaze winced and narrowed under those battering words.

“You’re goin’ ’cause you’re a good man an’ thank
God
black! You an’ Link’ll be outstandin’ as
hell
! Like Big Yawn here, who’ll stand about a foot an’ a half taller than anybody there!” Keats took a quick, angry breath. “Shad’s sendin’ you three with me ’cause he thinks you’re the most all-round impressive bastards t’ go along on this first, hard day!”

Shiny’s low voice just barely hung on. “Won’t do nothin’,” he muttered, “made t’ feel like a dumb, black nigger sonofabitch.”

For some reason, Shiny was really hurting, and we all looked at him, puzzled.

With a frowning, genuine innocence, his brother, Link, said, “Nobody’s made
me
feel like a dumb, black nigger sonofabitch.”

As one of the chosen three, uncomfortable, and with nothing better to say just then, Big Yawn rumbled, “Me neither.”

Slim was quiet but about equally as sore as Old Keats. They both felt that Shad’s fairness was in question. “Civil War’s finished these fifteen years, Shiny. Slavery abolished an’ all. An’ you still think, either way, whether you’re
picked
or
not
picked, you’re bein’ picked
on
!”

Rostov’s four cossacks were mounted and waiting, and it was easy for them to see that we had some kind of problem, so Shad cut it short. He twisted the bit in his hand just slightly, so that Shiny’s mare was damned ready and willing to back away and sit down. “I told ya’ t’ get off, Shiny, and I’ll send somebody else.”

“Easy, boss, ya’ might hurt her.”

“I won’t hurt her. I’ll just get on the saddle when you finally get off.”

And then, with Shiny’s mare Ginger about to be forced down on her haunches, Shiny said the damnedest thing to Shad. “Did you ever say I was a dumb, black nigger sonofabitch?”

“No! But I’ll say it right now, you dumb, nigger sonofabitch!”

Somehow that suddenly turned things around. Shiny said “Okay” in such an easy way that Shad damnere let go of Ginger’s bit, and she reared back up to a full standing position.

Knowing Shad the way I did, I couldn’t see any reason for it, but Shiny repeated the question. “You never said that?”

“I just now
did
!” Shad told him flatly, still holding the bit and controlling the mare.

I looked at Shiny, who knew that Shad couldn’t tell him anything but the truth. And for maybe the first and the last time I had a brief, fleeting look then into Shiny’s mind, which was both at once so smart and yet so innocent, and even more, so terribly hardened, that it would be the first to collapse under a gentle pressure of kindness.

And Shad, not trying to be kind, was so. “If you an’ me don’t know what the hell we’re talkin’ about,” he said gruffly, “then there ain’t no goddamn sense in the whole world. So what are you talkin’ about a dumb, nigger sonofabitch for?”

Shiny had a hard time asking. “Am I goin’ into that town as a nigger or as a man?”

“That’s up t’ you.” Shad’s quiet voice still cut hard as an ax. “And don’t never question me on that again. Because if ya’ have t’ ask about bein’ a man, then you already said the answer.”

Shiny took this in, and understood. “Boss,” he said, “if you don’t let go a’ that bit, it’ll be harder’n hell for me t’ ever make it t’ town with them fellas.”

Our other three men now moved off to join the cossacks, who were starting up over the hill toward Khabarovsk.

Shad released the bit and stepped back.

Shiny fingered the reins briefly, gently regaining control of Ginger, and calming her. He said, “I’ll tell ya’ one thing, boss. Bein’ picked as a man sure does make a difference.” And then he spurred off at a dead run.

We watched as he raced his pony to catch up to the other seven men, and then together they mounted the hills between us and Khabarovsk
.
Finally they disappeared, topping the last high crest and going out of our sight down those far, sloping meadows stretching toward the town.

“That can turn out t’ be a kind of a rough detail,” I said, feeling a lot, but not talking to anybody in particular.

“They’ll be okay,” Slim said in the same general way, “if they just remember t’ handle themselves like they ought.”

“Eight good men there.” Shad stepped over and swung up aboard his big Red. “They’ll bluff that town out, like we did, an’ be back in good shape.”

He put his spurs to Red and loped on over to the meadow to take stock of the herd and the men riding it. About the same time, Slim went off to do something or other, and the rest of us were free for a little while to do whatever we wanted.

For myself, I got some neat’s-foot oil and sat by my bedroll to put some of it on my bridle. The leather had been hardening up, and that oil would sink right into it, making it softer and stronger, so it wouldn’t brittle up and crack. Neat’s-foot oil was the best cure in the world for bad-off leather. And the funny thing about that sticky yellow stuff was that like the very leather it was saving, it came from a cow, too. It was made from the crushed bones of cattle, and along with being a cure-all for leather, it was also a first-class medicine for saddle sores or for cuts or tick infections or whatever cattle might get. Old Keats had first brought that fact to my attention a few years back. “It’s as though, in a strange way, everything in the world starts an’ stops with one ol’ cow.” We’d been fixing a beaten-up harness with neat’s-foot. “Yep,” Keats had gone on thoughtfully. “As
though God never gave us a problem without the answer being right next to it.”

Maybe what’s made me go on like this was the problem of Shiny Jackson. And I was about to find out that the answer was sitting right next to me.

A small card game had started up nearby, and I wound up both working with the bridle and at the same time sort of halfway listening to Crab and Rufe and Dixie playing blackjack for beans and arguing quietly among themselves about the game.

Dixie spoke a word that somehow jarred my ear. He said “misfit,” which sure as hell didn’t seem to me to be a word that’s used all that much. And also, sure as hell, I’d heard that unoften word used not long before.

I looked over at their game at about the same time that the ace of spades came up in front of Dixie. It was his first card face up and it gave him blackjack, and he said to that ace of spades in a real pleased way, “You black nigger sonofabitch!” as he started to gather his beans in from the pot.

I put down the bridle and stood up and faced him, just looking at him without saying anything.

He glanced at me once or twice, just standing there before him. Then he finally glared at me and said, “What the fuck are you starin’ at?”

“It was you,” I said.

He’d gone over twenty-one in this hand anyway, so he tossed his cards back in with a violent, angry gesture. “Yeah?—
What
was me?”

I still couldn’t think of any better words, so I said simply, once again, “It was you.”

He reared halfway up, onto one knee, madder than one of them Indian cobras coming up out of a basket, and damned if his tongue wasn’t flicking around in that same kind of a spooky way. “I told Shiny the way it would be!” He reared even higher, the tongue still going, with the threat of fangs somewhere behind it. “Them too niggers’ll be the first t’ go!”

“Maybe.” I was too filled up with feeling to say anymore.

“Then what are ya’ starin’ at?”

Crab and Rufe didn’t know quite what was going on, but they knew Dixie was ignoring the cards he’d just been dealt. And they knew there was something rough in the air. “Levi,” Crab said to my silence, “you ain’t bein’ your normal quick an’ witty self.”

That broke me loose enough to finally at least say more than a couple of words at a time. “Just who told Shiny that Shad said that he was a dumb, black nigger sonofabitch?”

“Anybody
knows
that he is!” Dixie stood full up, ready to fight.

But, oh, God, was he going to lose, judging from the hard power and fury raging up inside me.

And he did lose.

But I got slightly whacked around in the process.

The way that now came about was that Dixie said, “Just fuck off, nigger lover!”

I replied to that, “Shiny Jackson is worth ten thousand of you, lined up side by side.”

And then we went into the battle, which I had the advantage of because I was so mad that while he was swinging at me, I’d already knocked him ass over teakettle in the first place.

It happened to, actually in truth, be an ass over a teakettle.

We were so close to the cossacks that Dixie’s butt, with him attached to it, went sailing across a small fire with some tea boiling on it.

He leaped up out of that overturned boiling tea and scattered fire with a great deal of alacrity and charged back upon me, and with the cowboys and cossacks not interfering on either side, we went to it. Since it was between two Slash-Diamonders, even Rostov stayed out of it.

I won, as I sort of hinted before.

But I wasn’t too proud of it. Every time he hit me, it hurt. But it was almost like it didn’t really matter. Because he could
have hit me with a goddamned ax and I’d have still gone back at him. And every time I hit him, I felt sorry for the whole way he was. Maybe it was because I knew that in the final, final judgment of whatever gods there are, I was right and he was wrong. In any case, I knew I’d whip him. And I also knew that then I’d have to take care of him.

And that’s what happened.

When Shad came back to camp a little later, packing his saddle on his shoulder, he looked at me swabbing down Dixie’s beaten-up face and asked, which was kind of natural, “What happened?”

“He fell down,” I said.

“And you?”

I couldn’t see Rostov, but I had a feeling there was a faint grin on his face as he and some of his men now mounted up and rode away. It was plain that he’d just stayed long enough to make sure nobody got killed.