The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (325 page)

BOOK: The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
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Helen, I mean.

 

Sir, tell my gentlewoman that I want a word with her;

Helen, I mean.

 

Clown

Was this fair face the cause, quoth she,

Why the Grecians sacked Troy?

Fond done, done fond,

Was this King Priam's joy?

With that she sighed as she stood,

With that she sighed as she stood,

And gave this sentence then;

Among nine bad if one be good,

Among nine bad if one be good,

There's yet one good in ten.

 

Was this fair face the reason, she asked,

for the Greeks sacking Troy?

It was done for love, for love,

was this King Priam's delight?

With that she sighed as she stood there,

with that she sighed as she stood there,

and she spoke this sentence;

if there are nine bad people and one good,

if there are nine bad people and one good,

that means there's still one good person in ten.

 

COUNTESS

What, one good in ten? you corrupt the song, sirrah.

 

One good in ten? You're twisting the song, Sir.

 

Clown

One good woman in ten, madam; which is a purifying

o' the song: would God would serve the world so all

the year! we'ld find no fault with the tithe-woman,

if I were the parson. One in ten, quoth a'! An we

might have a good woman born but one every blazing

star, or at an earthquake, 'twould mend the lottery

well: a man may draw his heart out, ere a' pluck

one.

 

One good woman in ten, madam; which cleans up

the song: if only God could give us that proportion!

If I were the parson I'd be quite happy with

a tenth of womankind. One in ten you say! If we

just had a good woman born for every shooting

start, or when there is an earthquake, it would

improve the odds: a man could tear out his heart before he gets a good one.

 

COUNTESS

You'll be gone, sir knave, and do as I command you.

 

You'll get out, you scoundrel, and do as you've been told.

 

Clown

That man should be at woman's command, and yet no

hurt done! Though honesty be no puritan, yet it

will do no hurt; it will wear the surplice of

humility over the black gown of a big heart. I am

going, forsooth: the business is for Helen to come hither.

 

That a man should be at a woman's command, and yet

there's no harm done! Honesty is not a puritan,

but it won't do any harm; it will wear the surplice

of humility over theblack gown of a big heart. Alright,

I'm going! You want Helen to come here.

 

Exit

 

COUNTESS

Well, now.

 

Right then.

 

Steward

I know, madam, you love your gentlewoman entirely.

 

I know, madam, that you completely love your gentlewoman.

 

COUNTESS

Faith, I do: her father bequeathed her to me; and

she herself, without other advantage, may lawfully

make title to as much love as she finds: there is

more owing her than is paid; and more shall be paid

her than she'll demand.

 

Indeed I do: her father left her to me; and she,

having been left nothing else, has a lawful claim

to as much love as she can get; she is owed

more than she is paid; and she will be paid

more than she will ask for.

 

Steward

Madam, I was very late more near her than I think

she wished me: alone she was, and did communicate

to herself her own words to her own ears; she

thought, I dare vow for her, they touched not any

stranger sense. Her matter was, she loved your son:

Fortune, she said, was no goddess, that had put

such difference betwixt their two estates; Love no

god, that would not extend his might, only where

qualities were level; Dian no queen of virgins, that

would suffer her poor knight surprised, without

rescue in the first assault or ransom afterward.

This she delivered in the most bitter touch of

sorrow that e'er I heard virgin exclaim in: which I

held my duty speedily to acquaint you withal;

sithence, in the loss that may happen, it concerns

you something to know it.

 

Madam, I was recently closer to her than I think

she would have liked: she was alone and

was talking to herself; I am sure

she didn't know anyone else heard her words.

What she was saying was that she loved your son:

she said that Fortune was no goddess, to have made

them both in such different classes; Love was

no god if he would only apply his force when

people were equal; Diana was no queen of virgins,

this she would allow her poor knight to be surprised,

if he couldn't be rescued in the first attack or ransomed afterwards.

She said all this in the most bitter and sorrowful

manner that I ever heard from a girl: so I thought

that it was my duty to let you know about it as soon as possible;

seeing as what you could lose, it's your business to know what's going on.

 

COUNTESS

You have discharged this honestly; keep it to

yourself: many likelihoods informed me of this

before, which hung so tottering in the balance that

I could neither believe nor misdoubt. Pray you,

leave me: stall this in your bosom; and I thank you

for your honest care: I will speak with you further anon.

 

You have done your duty well; keep it to

yourself: there were many things before which made me

suspect this, but it was so finely balanced that

I could neither believe nor disbelieve. Please,

leave me: keep this yourself; and I thank you

for your good service: I'll speak more to you soon.

 

Exit Steward

 

Enter HELENA

Even so it was with me when I was young:

If ever we are nature's, these are ours; this thorn

Doth to our rose of youth rightly belong;

Our blood to us, this to our blood is born;

It is the show and seal of nature's truth,

Where love's strong passion is impress'd in youth:

By our remembrances of days foregone,

Such were our faults, or then we thought them none.

Her eye is sick on't: I observe her now.

 

It was just like this with me when I was young:

this comes from our natures; this thorn

is a proper part of the rose of our youth;

it is as much a part of it as our blood;

it is symbolic of the force of nature,

where the passion of love is embedded in the young:

I can remember the days gone by,

when I had these faults, although we didn't think they were faults then.

She is sick with it: I can see her now.

 

HELENA

What is your pleasure, madam?

 

What would you like me to do, madam?

 

COUNTESS

You know, Helen,

I am a mother to you.

 

You know, Helen,

that I am a mother to you.

 

HELENA

Mine honourable mistress.

 

My honourable mistress.

 

COUNTESS

Nay, a mother:

Why not a mother? When I said 'a mother,'

Methought you saw a serpent: what's in 'mother,'

That you start at it? I say, I am your mother;

And put you in the catalogue of those

That were enwombed mine: 'tis often seen

Adoption strives with nature and choice breeds

A native slip to us from foreign seeds:

You ne'er oppress'd me with a mother's groan,

Yet I express to you a mother's care:

God's mercy, maiden! does it curd thy blood

To say I am thy mother? What's the matter,

That this distemper'd messenger of wet,

The many-colour'd Iris, rounds thine eye?

Why? that you are my daughter?

 

No, a mother:

why not a mother? When I said ‘a mother,’

you looked as though you'd seen a snake: what is it about ‘mother,’

that makes you shy away? I tell you, I am your mother;

I include you in the list of the ones

that came from my womb: it is often the case

that adoption fights with nature and breeding

and things from foreign seeds become native.

I never had the pain of giving birth to you,

but I offer you the care of a mother:

good God, girl! Would it kill you

to say I am your mother? Why

are these tears falling from your eyes?

Is it because you are my daughter?

 

HELENA

That I am not.

 

I am not your daughter.

 

COUNTESS

I say, I am your mother.

 

I'm telling you I am your mother.

 

HELENA

Pardon, madam;

The Count Rousillon cannot be my brother:

I am from humble, he from honour'd name;

No note upon my parents, his all noble:

My master, my dear lord he is; and I

His servant live, and will his vassal die:

He must not be my brother.

 

Excuse me, madam;

Count Rousillon cannot be my brother:

I come from a humble background, him from a noble one;

my parents had no fame, his are all noble:

he is my master, my dear lord; and I

live as his servant, and will die the same:

he cannot be my brother.

 

COUNTESS

Nor I your mother?

 

So I can't be your mother?

 

HELENA

You are my mother, madam; would you were,--

So that my lord your son were not my brother,--

Indeed my mother! or were you both our mothers,

I care no more for than I do for heaven,

So I were not his sister. Can't no other,

But, I your daughter, he must be my brother?

 

You are my mother, madam; but I wish it was-

that my Lord your son was not my brother-

you are my mother indeed! Or if you were mother to us both,

I would give up heaven

to not be his sister. Can't it be any other way than that

being your daughter, he must be my brother?

 

COUNTESS

Yes, Helen, you might be my daughter-in-law:

God shield you mean it not! daughter and mother

So strive upon your pulse. What, pale again?

My fear hath catch'd your fondness: now I see

The mystery of your loneliness, and find

Your salt tears' head: now to all sense 'tis gross

You love my son; invention is ashamed,

Against the proclamation of thy passion,

To say thou dost not: therefore tell me true;

But tell me then, 'tis so; for, look thy cheeks

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