The Collected Works of Chögyam Trungpa: Volume Eight (36 page)

We have to learn to think differently. You see, things are not always made. Ultimately speaking, there’s no artificer. I think that’s a theistic bias that some of you may have, if I may say so. But there
are
situations that are not made by anybody at all. When we try to describe this dot, we have to say something about it, and that makes it sound as if it does exist. But even the word
existence
is inadequate. That is why we call the dot “unconditional.” It is beyond our conception. It is before we ever conceived of
I
and
am
at all. This primordial dot is fundamentally
it,
and it is pure, and therefore, it is
good. Good
in this case refers to unconditional goodness, free from good and bad, better and worse. There is a unique and unusual, fresh, and basic situation that we have, which is the essence of warriorship, the essence of human being. It is unconditional primordial goodness.

We call it a
dot
because it occurs very abruptly in the situation, on the spot. It cannot be traced by scientific examination or by an alpha machine. It is just a dot, which always occurs. The dot occurs when we are uncertain. If you are driving quite fast and you see an intersection up ahead and you are uncertain which way to turn, at that point, there is a gap and the dot occurs. Then there is an afterthought: “Turn right,” or “Turn left,” or “I’ll have to take a guess.” The dot occurs when you feel sad and you wonder, “Will I burst into tears, or can I hold back my tears?” The dot occurs when you see a person. “Should I frown or smile?” There is indecision, and the dot occurs. That is the human condition. It does not tell you exactly what to do.

At the junction of that and this, the human condition is expressed as a challenge. Therefore, it has been said that this primordial dot is the source of fearlessness and also the source of fear or terror. Sometimes you find the dot is petrifying, without any reason. Sometimes you find it makes you quite heroic. One never knows where the fear or the courage comes from. It’s almost at the level of an infant’s experience rather than anything metaphysical or conditional. It’s as simple as jumping into the shower and finding that the water is cold or hot. The water temperature is not your state of mind. A cold shower is a cold shower. A hot shower is a hot shower. Where did it come from? It’s very direct. Unconditional goodness, the primordial dot, is free from any neurosis. It’s 200 percent truth. That’s it! It’s hot or cold, which is not particularly a product of neurosis at all.

If you try to figure out what I’m talking about logically, it will be almost impossible. Look at the fickleness of mind, waving like a flag in a strong wind. You have a sudden stop, and the primordial dot occurs, in the form of either confirmation, indecision, or whatever it may be. It is like a military march, where the drill sergeant shouts, “COMPANY . . . !” The primordial dot occurs. Then, the sergeant may say, “Left wheel!” which is after the fact. It could be any command: “COMPANY . . . Attention!” “COMPANY . . . Halt!”

When the gong rings as you begin the sitting practice of meditation, when the gong rings as you finish your sitting practice, the primordial dot occurs. When you’re about to drink a cup of coffee in the morning, wondering whether it’s sweet enough or has enough cream in it, whether it’s hot or cold, as you bring the cup of coffee toward your mouth, as your lips quiver and protrude to touch the cup of coffee—at that very moment, the primordial dot occurs. It is the essence of humanity and warriorship.

Wherever there is a junction in our experience, the primordial dot occurs. Before experience becomes hot or cold, good or bad, there is a junction where the primordial dot occurs. The primordial dot has no bias to either that or this; therefore, it is unconditional. It is the mark of existence of human being and of the challenge of the human heart. Before the challenge, there is
it
. It’s like hearing a big bang, like the explosion of a cannon. You hear a bang, and then you wonder whether that bang is going to kill you or celebrate with you. One never knows. Usually, it’s neither. It’s just a big bang.

The dot is the beginning. Can you think of any other ways to describe it? Splash? Square? Dash? Any one of them might do, after the fact. It is a dot, just
touch
. It is like saying “NOW,” particularly in the English language.
Now. Here
. You could say “dot,” or you could say “BANG,” if you like. Visually, it’s a dot; audibly, it might be a bang. It’s quick, precise, and pinpointed. If we trace back in the Buddhist tradition, there is a term,
bija,
which means “dot word.” O
M, AH,
and
HUM,
for example, are what are called bija mantras. Such a dot, or bija, is onomatopoeic, just one shout, a cosmic sneeze. Trusting that such a primordial dot does exist in us is not a matter of belief. It’s not something you’ve been taught and therefore you believe it. In this case, you experience it as so. Therefore, it is trustworthy. It is always one dot. Always. You can’t have several dots; otherwise, it becomes a relative dot.

Having had the primordial dot experience, you can join that with the practice of warriorship, the Shambhala journey. When you put the dot and the practice together, then you will know the best way to conduct yourself. The primordial dot is the essence or strength, but by itself, it is not particularly a help or a harm. It’s just potential. You have your guts; you have your heart; you have your brain. But then you say, “What can I do with such a fantastic brain, an excellent heart, and excellent guts?” You can’t do very much if you don’t have any path or journey to follow. That’s where helping others and developing yourself comes into the picture. When you have a yearning, a sympathetic attitude toward yourself and others, and a willingness to become genuine, then the primordial dot becomes a somewhat conditional primordial dot. Then you have a path; you have a journey.

The path and practice of the Shambhala training are how to cultivate the primordial dot as a creative situation. We shouldn’t exactly say “cultivate” the dot. We can say that we
have
the dot; therefore, we take advantage of it. We can’t really cultivate it. It was cultivated a long time ago. We have it, and then the question is what we will do after that. When we open our eyes, the first thing we see is the horizon. We see light. Similarly, having experienced the dot, we feel a breeze of fresh air, and we can proceed. Through the warrior’s subsequent training process, the first dot becomes helpful, a way to wake yourself and others up.

Trusting in the dot means actually having to make friends with an unconditional situation. It arouses your intention to save yourself as well as others from misery, confusion, and darkness. It is like the Buddhist notion of the bodhisattva: that you are going to be benevolent and help others. You are not going to fall asleep, but you’re going to use your direct understanding of the primordial dot to help others. To do so, you have to believe in freedom, liberation. Nobody is completely blind to the primordial dot, at all. Everybody has at least a quick, short, tiny glimpse of that primordial dot. So no one is hopeless. It is our duty to realize that. The dot is potential, the potential to do
anything
. Freedom is the path, working with the dot and applying that potential.
Free
is the pure experience of the dot, and
dom
is the action that arises from that.
Free
is first flash, first thought, and then
dom
is second thought. The warrior principles of genuineness, decency, and goodness, with excellent head and shoulders, all lead us to work with others. Here, basic goodness is no longer a theory or a moralistic concept. It is direct and personal experience. Therefore, we can trust in liberating the setting-sun world altogether.

The primordial dot is free from bias of any kind; it is guileless. Therefore, we can make a connection with people, including ourselves. As we progress further and further, we realize that what we are being taught is so real, much closer to actual reality. Maybe at the beginning there was some element of make-believe or conmanship, using our aspiration to arouse our potential warriorship. But as we progress, we witness actual magic, manifest on the spot: We are worthy of being human beings. Then we can no longer lie back and say, “What a relief! Now that I’ve heard about the primordial dot, I can relax.” Instead, we develop further ambition to open ourselves to work with others. We declare ourselves as the diaper service, garbage collectors, janitors, taxi drivers—the laborers to serve humanity.

You probably know, more than I do, that this world needs tremendous help. Everybody’s in trouble. Sometimes they pretend not to be, but still, there’s a lot of pain and hardship. Everybody, every minute, is tortured, suffering a lot. We shouldn’t just ignore them and save ourselves alone. That would be a tremendous crime. In fact, we
can’t
just save ourselves, because our neighbors are moaning and groaning all over the place. So even if we could just save ourselves, we wouldn’t have a peaceful sleep. The rest of the world is going to wake us up with their pain.

I don’t see any particular problems in working with others. Just go ahead. Push yourself harder. Sometimes you find that you don’t like someone you are trying to work with. But if you look behind their facade, you see that the person is, in fact, quite lovable. They do possess the primordial dot. When you first talk to them, you might find them completely off-putting and irritating. You wouldn’t touch them with a ten-foot pole. But gradually, your pole becomes shorter. You begin to do a double take; you might even begin to like them. The point here is that you have to push harder, and then there’s no problem at all.

You might be working with somebody who is completely untrustworthy, but that doesn’t matter. Trust begins with trusting in yourself, your dot, and your commitment. You have to work hard to help others, directly, without even wearing rubber gloves to clean up their vomit. You’re not like an employer who is interviewing potential employees to decide which ones to hire. We are going to help others, regardless of their workability. That is not particularly our reference point. The point is to just be precise and ordinary with everyone, yourself and others. When we talk about working with others, we are talking about working with
ourselves
to begin with. If we are ready to work with others, it doesn’t matter
who
comes along in our world. One has to do it, one can do it, and one should do it, because we have that particular tendency known as basic goodness. We have that first thought to flash onto the situation. We are highly well equipped to help others.

Having trust in freedom, or liberation, comes from having conviction in our primordial dot. The experience of the primordial dot also brings inscrutability so that we don’t become so upset by the pain of the world that we’re paralyzed by it. We don’t break down completely, but we maintain our head and shoulders so that we are capable of helping others. The practical means of realizing all of this is the sitting practice of meditation. Without experiencing the practice, you may have difficulty understanding what I’m saying. The practice of meditation can help you to understand the purpose and reasons for your being in the world. Practice will help to answer some of those questions, although it will also leave a lot of questions unanswered. That ground where answers and uncertainty come together will be our working basis.

FIVE

Discipline in the Four Seasons

There is a time for restriction. There is a time for opening. There is a time for celebrating. There is a time to be practical and productive. Basic natural hierarchy operates that way, and the vision of the Shambhala Kingdom is based on those principles.

T
HE
S
HAMBHALA IDEA OF RENUNCIATION
is being free from laziness as a whole. When the students of Shambhala feel that they have to be mindful twenty-four hours a day, sometimes they wish that they could take short little breaks, here and there, and just indulge and let go in the negative sense. Sometimes they think, “In the good old days, I used to be able to do everything. I could even take pride in degrading myself.” That temptation to lower oneself down into subhuman level is what is renounced.

We have already discussed the importance of working for others. Working for others inspires us to work further on ourselves by renouncing the neurosis of the setting sun. Then, the neurosis that others indulge in is no longer our reference point or our temptation. Because we already have an understanding of our basic goodness, we have acquired some protection from being brought down into the lower realms. And having experienced the primordial dot, we know that we are well equipped to work with ourselves and others. Nonetheless, being mindful and alert all the time is quite difficult, so there might be temptations. Therefore, renunciation is a key point. However, renunciation is not going back to a gray area, but it is a celebration. It is experiencing the joy of basic goodness. That is what brings renunciation.

There is tremendous self-destructive and perpetual pain that comes from missing the point in the setting-sun world. The logic of the setting sun is based on cultivating pleasure, seemingly. But the end product is that, by seeming to cultivate pleasure, you inherit pain. The setting-sun outlook is based on indulging in your sense perceptions. It is being carefree and careless, which may be caused by being very wealthy, very poor, or by just being mindless. Out of desperation, you run to the nearest entertainment arcade, but you leave with a long face. Nothing has really entertained you, and you leave feeling disappointed. The Buddhist tradition talks a great deal about the nature of samsara, or conditioned existence, and how indulging one’s ego and trying to glorify oneself produces more pain rather than pleasure of any kind. So studying the setting-sun approach is absolutely necessary as part of the development of renunciation. Understanding the setting sun brings further inspiration for working with others, and it also connects you further with the primordial dot.