Read The Cockatrice Boys Online
Authors: Joan Aiken
“Form THREES!
Snark weaponsâTUNE!
Snark weaponsâPOINT!
Snark weaponsâFIRE!
As you were. Reload, Make ready. BreatheâIN!”
Every seven seconds there was a loud crackle as the Snark guns were fired. The archbishop sighed.
“Warfare always seems so simple,” he said. “That is why almost everybody falls back on it in the end. It is the dealings and manoeuvrings beforehand that are so dangerous and delicate. And important. Of course we must always hope to avoid open war if we can.”
“Even if we are right, and the other lot are wrong?” asked Dakin.
The archbishop sighed again. “But who knows for sureâ” he was beginning, when the phone rang.
“Oh dear me, that may be headquarters for Colonel Clipspeak. He was hoping for a call. Would you take it, Sauna, and I will call the colonelâ”
But even before Sauna could pick up the receiver, they heard the same nasal whining voice that on the former occasion had echoed round Bellswinger's little office. It seemed to pour at them like smoke out of the wall panels and the furniture and the relief map on the end wall.
“
Sauna! My little Sauna!
”
The dog Uli leapt up, howled miserably and, with ears flattened and tail trailing, bolted precipitately from the room.
“Oh, mercy!” gasped Sauna, much too scared to pick up the phone. The archbishop stretched out his hand for the receiver. “Don't touch it, sir,
don't!
” cried Sauna. “The sergeant did, when this happened before, and he got a real awful shock.”
“Sauna! Come to me, come! Come to your grandfather's house! I need you so ba-a-a-adly! I am all alone, and old, and helpless, and crippled. Nobody helps me. I need you to care for me, Sauna!
I
looked after
you,
all that time, I rescued you, I fed you and loved you and was a mother to youânow it's your turn to make a repayment for all I did. For my friends don't come any moreânobody comesâand it's lo-o-o-onely here, it's co-o-o-old. Come to your grandfather's house. I need your young hands to help me. And, if you come, perhaps my friends will come backâahh-ahh-ahh!”
The words ended in a gibbering shriek.
The archbishop had leapt to his feet and stood listening, all aquiver, like a gundog pointing at a rustle in the leaves. The small plump man suddenly seemed charged with power and a kind of righteous fury.
“Begone! you foul spirit!” he called out in a loud, clear voice. “You have no right in this world. You have no right to make any such demand on the girl. None! Get you gone to your own place!”
“⦠Only wanted a little comfort!” whimpered the voice. “So coldâso lonelyâall in the darkâno stairs to climb, no light, no smells, no sounds, no tastes, no voicesâ”
“You have no right to such comforts!” thundered the archbishop. “You bartered away those rights when you made your bad bargain. You made your own wicked bed and now you must lie in it. Begone! And stop tormenting the child.”
Dakin and Sauna stared at one another, open-mouthed and wide-eyed.
The voice died away in faint wails and sobs.
Dr. Wren wiped beads of perspiration from his brow.
“That was very instructive,” he said. “Very instructive indeed. I must devote a lot of thought and prayer to this occurrence, my child. Meanwhileâif anything like that should happen againâpay no heed to it! None! Do not even reply. If necessary, clap your hands over your ears to shut out the sound.”
“Thenâ” whispered Sauna, “
wasn't
it my Auntie Floss on the line?”
“It is more likely,” said Dr. Wren, “that somebodyâsomethingâwas impersonating her. Orâif it was your auntâshe has been taken overâpossessedâby some external power. So you must on no account take any notice, or even
think
of complying with any of her demands.”
“No, sir. Th-thank you.”
Uli crawled back into the office, dragging his tail along the floor, whining, very much ashamed of himself. He laid his huge shaggy head on Sauna's knee and looked up at her as if to say, “I do apologize, but really it was quite out of my power to stay in the room with
that
going on.”
“SQUADâdisMISS!” bawled Sergeant Bellswinger outside.
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
“Do you think that
was
Aunt Floss's voice?” said Sauna to Dakin when they were alone together. “You met her, you heard her talk?”
Dakin was doubtful. “I wasn't there for long,” he said cautiously. “It sounded sort of like herâbutâI dunno. It could have been somebody imitating her voice. That's what Dr. Wren seems to think. And he's a canny old cove.”
“But
why
should somebody do that?
Who?
” shivered Sauna. “If it isn't Auntie Floss, who in the world would ask for me to come like that?”
“Well,” said Dakin, “best do what Dr. Wren saysâtake no notice; don't think about it.”
“That's easy for you to say! It wasn't speaking to you!”
Dakin reflected that this was true. But he did not know how to help Sauna, and this made him rather impatient.
“
Try
not to think about it. Shall we play a game of checkers?”
“No,” said Sauna, “I'd rather read a bit more of that book about Rome.”
Reading about what happened in Rome so long ago, she thought, might take her mind off what was happening now.
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
That night Sauna had a bad dream. She woke up in the cabin that she shared with Mrs. Churt shrieking her head off. She found herself on the floor, having rolled clean out of her bunk, which was the upper one.
At the time the train was stationary, waiting for daylight so as to resume its journey on the relaid track to Newcastle.
Sauna had been looking forward with painful excitement to revisiting the town where she had lived happily with her father and mother until they set off for that ill-fated Spanish holiday. Since then she had never been back. If there was time, Colonel Clipspeak had promised, and not too many monsters about, Lieutenant Upfold might escort her to Dry Dock Street, to look at her former home.
Perhaps it was memories of her previous life that had crept into her head and made her dream.
At any rate she let out such a fearful shriek that it woke every soul on the train. Guards cocked their Snark guns, sentries switched on their battle flares, sleeping soldiers tumbled out of their berths and reached around for weapons, the Colonel shot bolt upright in his bed and shouted for Sergeant Bellswinger on the internal line, alarm bells went off and the dog Uli let out a series of shattering barks.
“What is it, my duck, whatever's the matter?” cried Mrs. Churt, who slept in the lower bunk and had heard Sauna fall past her and land with a thud on the ground shrieking all the while.
“Oh!” gasped Sauna. “It was just a dreamâbut it was so
awful.
”
Mrs. Churt stuck out a skinny arm and wrapped it comfortingly round Sauna's shoulders.
“Now, now, dearie, don't take on! A dream's only a dream! Here, put a blanket round you and let's us go along to the galley and make ourselves a cup of sassafras tea.”
With her teeth chattering, Sauna meekly obeyed. Half the train was awake and stirring by now, and Mrs. Churt had to make about thirty cups of sassafras tea, and find a bowl of marrow broth for Uli, who also slept in her cabin. Sauna had landed on him when she fell, which helped break her fall but left Uli feeling rather hard done by.
“What was the dream about, my child?” asked Dr. Wren, when the startled soldiers had drunk their tea and gone grumbling back to their beds or their watch posts.
“Oh, sir, it was so awful! I was with Mam and Dad and we was going on holiday. In the train. And we came to a station called Douleur. And my Dad said, âThat means sorrow in French'.”
“So it does,” said the archbishop thoughtfully. “Dolour.”
“Well, we all got out at this station with our bags and we got a horse and trap to take us on to where we were going. The place called Bride's Bridge, where we always used to stay. I saw a street sign that said Sorrow Street. And when we got to the place, Mam said to me, You'll want to go and see your Aunt Ailie, while we do the unpacking. She'll give you some of her treacle candy, for sure, or some of her fochabers. (Those were cakes and sweeties that Aunt Ailie used to make.)”
“Yes, my child?”
“So I went along the road to Aunt Ailie's cottage. I could hear the river, rumbling like the sound of gunfire. It was in spate, rushing down between the rocks. And then I came to Aunt Ailie's cottage up the hillâit was a small stone house thatched with reeds and heatherâandâandâ” Her voice shook. “Oh, it was awful,” she muttered.
“
What
was, my child?” The archbishop's voice was comforting but firm.
“Outside the door there was standingâa-a-a thing.”
“What kind of a thing?”
“Well, it was shaped like a personâbut it was all made of withies, willow wands. Wicker. Like a fence. Bent and twisted into a shape. It was dark brown, you could see right through it, between the wands. Like aâlike a lobster pot. There was a shape for the head, and a shape for the chest, and two arms that were just made of several thin wands bunched together and curved into claws for the hands. The ones for the head was all coiled round in a bundle. The hands were springy and dark, almost blackâ”
“Calmly, take it calmly now, my dearâ”
“And down below there was legs coming out from under its skirt. They were all wet and muddyâas if it had waded out of the brookâ”
“Gently now, take a deep breathâ”
“And it began to walk towards me, it began to raise its armsâand I couldn't stand it, I woke up, yellingâ”
“And I don't blame you at all,” said the archbishop. “A most disagreeable dream. Terrifying. I should have yelled myself.”
“Sir, what does it mean? What
was
that thing?”
“Child, it was nothing but a scarecrow put together to frighten you.”
“But it was alive!”
“No, it was a puppet. Or a marionette, hanging on stringsâmoved by somebody up above.”
If Dr. Wren had intended to soothe Sauna by this suggestion he had not succeeded. She whispered, “But thenâwho was that somebody? Where were they? In the house?”
“Child, child, all this was only your dream!”
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
“What do you make of that, Mrs. Churt?” said Dr. Wren quietly, when after much soothing and administration of calming potions Sauna had at last been persuaded back to bed.
Dr. Wren and Mrs. Churt had struck up a friendship which began when they found that they shared the same birthday, March the first, and went on when she discovered that he suffered from chilblains, and cured them in half a day with her comfrey ointment. They had discussions on many topics, and the archbishop often did a row in her cross-stitch, while they canvassed such problems as how to deal with hysterics, nightmares, stammering, hiccups, and fear of death.
“Well, sir, if you ask me, they're just trying to scare the girl,” said Mrs. Churt quietly. “But she don't scare easy, Sauna don't, if she's given time to pull herself together.”
“Ah,” said Dr. Wren. Thoughtfully he took a couple of stitches. Then he said, “And who are
they,
Mrs. Churt?”
“Why, sir, the Bad Ones.”
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
Next day the
Cockatrice Belle
crept across the River Tyne and was received with great acclaim and rejoicing by the citizens of Newcastle. The climate so far north was on the chilly side for Snarks, and so there were not a great many of these pests, but the city was much bedevilled by Kelpies and Trolls. Both these monsters were very unpleasant and dangerous. The Kelpies were large, slow-moving creatures with webbed feet, the bodies of horses or cows and human faces; they dripped water and seaweed, devoured any living creature they encountered and were virtually indestructible, as their thick hides turned off all bullets and darts. Trolls were of equally large dimensions. They had hypnotic fiery blue eyes and dynamic powers of self-transportation. They too were omniverous, and had much reduced the population of Newcastle. Their only vulnerable point was that if caught away from home at the moment of dawn they would turn to stone. It was thought they emerged at night from lurking-places in Harwood Forest, some miles north of the city. Sometimes they were entrapped by their own greed if they lingered too long in the streets munching their victims and were overtaken by sunrise. There were quite a number of stone Trolls to be seen in the city of Newcastle, and very hideous they were.