The Changeup (Men of the Show) (13 page)

She’d let things between them get out of hand, but she hadn’t been able to control herself. She hadn’t felt this alive in a long time and she didn’t want it to stop. Once he’d persuaded her to go on that first date and admit that she wanted to be with him, he’d made her feel things she hadn’t felt since before she married Kyle and hadn’t believed she would ever feel again.

None of that justified her losing her head. She needed to remind herself that she knew exactly what Chase would be giving up if he continued in a relationship with her, missing all the opportunities that went along with youth and being carefree. He needed to be with someone closer to his age so he could experience everything for the first time, as it should be. Not with someone jaded by experience.

Feeling sick with misery, Maddie laid her head down on her arms and tried to figure out where to start. How would she even approach him with this when it was so not what she wanted to do? She wanted to be selfish and keep him for herself, but she knew that was wrong. The last thing she wanted was him reflecting back and feeling nothing but regret for wasting some of his prime time with her. She couldn’t stand the thought of him hating her for that.

The front door opened and she didn’t need to look up to know that Karen had walked in. A few seconds later, Karen strolled into the kitchen and found Maddie in the middle of her breakdown.

“What’s going on here? Pity party?”

Maddie finally lifted her head and looked at Karen, her eyes shining brightly with unshed tears. She looked so pathetic that Karen immediately sat down next to her and put her arms around her shoulder. “What is it, honey? What happened?”

“I can’t do this.”

“You can’t do what?”

“I can’t do this to him.”

“Mad, help me out here. You’re not making sense. Who are you talking about? What did you do?” Karen asked, clearly confused.

She wiped at her eyes in frustration. “Chase. I can’t do this to Chase.”

“What can’t you do to Chase?”

Maddie stood up with a groan and walked over to the counter. Turning around, she swiped at her nose. “I can’t let him screw up his life. If he stays with me, he’s going to regret it.”

Karen scowled up at her. “How is him staying with you going to screw up his life and produce lifelong regret?”

“Because I’m older. I’m used up. I have baggage,” she said earnestly, trying to get her friend to understand.

“Yeah,” Karen said with a shake of her head. “I’m not following.”

Maddie wanted to scream in annoyance. How could Karen not understand what was so blatantly obvious? Why was she the only one who could see how wrong this all was? “Karen, he’s young. He has the world at his fingertips. He doesn’t need to feel strapped down to an old woman and her daughter.”

“I don’t know, Mad. I saw him with you the other day and he didn’t look strapped down to me. He looked pretty damn happy as a matter of fact.”

“He’s going to want a family one day. I’m getting too old to give him that. All I can give him is a ready-made one. He’s going to want a child of his own and he deserves that opportunity.”

Karen stood up, signaling time-out with her hands. “Okay, let’s just stop. I can see where you’re going with this.”

“Thank God you’re finally getting it,” Maddie said, relieved.

“What I’m getting is that you’re panicking and you’re rehashing all the reasons why you shouldn’t be with him.”

“Panicking? I’m not panicking. I’m thinking of what’s best for him.”

“Puh-leaze!” she rolled her eyes. “This is the classic case of Maddie panicking.”

Maddie stared at her friend wide-eyed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Shaking her head, she walked away and sat back down at the table, irritation replacing her feeling of desperation.

Karen crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. “This is just like in college when you met Kyle. You were over the moon at first and then, for some reason, you start producing all these ridiculous reasons why you shouldn’t be with him. With Kyle it was because he was so outgoing, the life of the party and you were a bore, too much of a wallflower. You were convinced you going to bring him down and he was going to hate you for that. Remember that?”

“No,” she lied. She hated that Karen remembered that.

“Right,” she huffed. “You remember exactly what I’m talking about and you’re doing the same thing here.” Karen walked over and knelt in front of her, placing her hands on Maddie’s knees. “I’m going to tell you the same thing I told you then. It’s okay for you to be happy. It’s okay for something good like this to happen to you. Don’t ruin it by conjuring up all these excuses why it shouldn’t be.”

“But...but, he’s so young.”

“Maddie, you can’t keep going back to that. Once you made the jump and went out with him, you lost that excuse. You can’t keep it as a fallback when you start to get scared.”

“But—”

“It’s okay to be scared, Maddie,” she interrupted with a gentle smile. “It’s okay. This is the first guy in a long time who makes you happy. Just let it play out. Don’t try to steer things, let them happen. If he decides he’s missing out and wants to move on, than that’s his decision and his loss. Not yours, honey.” Karen stood up and took the seat next to her friend. “Now, I don’t know him as well as you do, but from what I’ve heard, I don’t think he’d like for you to be making these decisions for him.”

Maddie gave her a watery smile. “No, you’re right. He wouldn’t.” She heaved a big sigh and grabbed Karen’s hand to give it a squeeze. “I’m just so strung out about everything. I feel like I’m being outed, but none of it’s on my own terms. I keep waiting for Sandy or Lenore to call or show up and freak out on me. They’ve had plenty of opportunity to find out about us if they’ve been paying any attention. We’ve been on TV and then splashed across the paper the next day. I keep expecting Chase to tell me his parents are giving him a hard time, but nothing’s happening. I feel like the wall is teetering and just about to fall, but it hasn’t yet, and so I keep stressing out over it. It was bad enough talking to my mom the other day. I felt like a teenager again listening to all her apprehensions and concerns, and she’s the mildest of everyone.” She gave a tired sigh.

“It’s not their decision, Maddie. It’s yours and Chase’s, that’s it.”

“I know, I know. Easier said than done though.”

“I know. That’s why I’m here. I’m your inner bitch.”

Maddie laughed and threw her arms around her friend. “Yes, you are and I love you for it. Thank you.”

Karen returned the hug before sitting back and looking around the kitchen. “So, what’s for dinner? Where’s my drink?”

Maddie stood up and headed out of the kitchen toward her room. “Chase is coming over after his game so I need to clean up my face. You know where the wine is.”

“Yea! I get to have dinner with the boyfriend. Tell him to bring Smutty,” she called out to Maddie’s back.

“You behave yourself, Karen Bently!”

“Whatever,” she mumbled.

* * *

Opening the fridge, Karen retrieved the open bottle of wine and filled two glasses. Taking a sip, she thought about Maddie’s latest meltdown and shook her head. That girl was forever selling herself short. She never believed she deserved any good things in life and Karen knew that her family was the cause of that. Never once had they ever put her happiness or wants ahead of theirs. It was always about them and because of that, Maddie always shied away from going after what she really wanted. If Karen hadn’t convinced Maddie that she deserved to be with someone like Kyle just as much as anyone else, she was sure they wouldn’t have dated or gotten married.

“Well, maybe that wasn’t such a good thing,” she muttered as she took another sip of her wine. Maddie definitely deserved happiness and she was ecstatic that she’d finally found it with Chase. Now she just had to make sure Maddie didn’t do anything stupid to mess it up.

The back door into the kitchen flew open and Karen turned in time to see Bree fly through into the front room. “Chase is here!”

She came around the corner and stood in the doorway of the kitchen as she watched Bree open the front door and wait patiently. As he got closer, Bree bounced up and down on her toes excitedly, and when he opened the door with a big grin on his face, she jumped up into his arms and threw her arms around his neck. Karen felt her heart melt.

“I’m so glad you’re here, Chase! I’ve been waiting for you to come and play catch with me.”

“Well, it’s nice to know that someone is anxious to see me,” he said giving her a squeeze back.

“Can we go play? Can we?”

“Uh, well, sure, but in a little while, okay? Where’s your mom?”

“She’s in the shower,” Karen said from the doorway where she’d watched their sweet exchange.

Chase looked up, noticing her for the first time. “Hi, Karen. How’s it going?”

With a navy ball cap on, a gray T-shirt layered with a white one and baggy navy cargo shorts, it was easy to see why Maddie found him so irresistible. He oozed maleness. He was tall, handsome, strong and edible. Her friend was one lucky lady. “I’m good. How about you? Can I get you a drink?”

He slipped Bree to the floor as he walked behind her to the kitchen. “Sure. Does she have anything that’s not wine?”

She gave him a smirk over her shoulder on her way to the fridge. “Not a wine fan, huh? I think she’s got some beer in here.”

“That’ll work.”

Karen grabbed a bottle and handed it to him. Turning toward Bree, attached to him like lint, she smiled sweetly. “Bree, honey, I need to speak with Chase for a second. Why don’t you go change into something more suitable for playing catch with him later?”

“Okay, Aunt Karen.”

He watched her skip off toward her room as he leaned against the counter before looking back at Karen. “Should I be worried?”

She purposely ignored him as she sat down at the table. “Look, Chase. I don’t know you very well, but from what I’ve heard from Maddie, you seem like a very nice guy.”

“But?”

“No, buts. Maddie and I have been friends for a very long time. We’ve been through a lot together. I helped her through her divorce and I helped her with Bree. There are a lot of things we disagree on, but I never questioned her decision to leave Kyle. The guy was a prick and I wanted to kill him myself.” When he said nothing and only took a swig of his beer, she continued. “I’m telling you this so you understand my loyalty to her.”

“I wouldn’t have expected anything different.”

“Well, then maybe you’ll be surprised when I tell you this.” Karen narrowed her eyes at him. “This is not to be repeated.”

“Got it.”

“Before you got here, she had a little meltdown, we’ll say. She’s happy, Chase, very happy because of you and that scares her half to death. She’s wary of that kind of happiness, doesn’t trust it, and because of that, she was trying to figure out how end it with you.”

The only reaction Karen saw was the hardening of his eyes. Otherwise, she would have thought he wasn’t listening. “And?” he finally asked.

“And, I had to talk her down, like I always do. Remind her that it’s okay for her to be happy and that she deserves it, and that she can’t make your decisions for you.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

She got up and stood before him, trapping his gaze in a cool steely stare. “I’m telling you this because I’m in your corner, Chase. I want you guys to win and I swear, if you screw this up, your head is mine. I’ll help with the craziness that’s Maddie, but you need to hold up your end of the bargain.”

Chase didn’t know whether to laugh or protect his privates, but he met her hard stare and nodded. “I won’t hurt her.”

Karen held her ground. They stood there eyeing each other with respect for a few seconds before Maddie walked in.

“Hey! What’s going on in here?” Seeing Karen standing close to Chase, staring intently at him, she stopped. “Karen, are you hitting on Chase already?”

Karen gave him one last hard look before placing a hand softly on his chest. She turned her head in Maddie’s direction with a sly look. “Damn, Maddie. You always walk in at the worst times. But no, I was pressuring him into introducing me to Smutty.”

Uncomfortable, Chase cleared his throat as he squeezed between Karen and the counter to get to Maddie. “Hey, there.” Putting his hand at the small of her back, he leaned down and gave her a healthy kiss.

“Hey, there,” Maddie said a little breathless when he released her. “How was your game? I didn’t catch the end of it.”

“We lost.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Maddie said.

“Yeah, well, you can’t win them all,” he said with a simple shrug.

“Okay, Chase. I’m ready!” Bree ran back into the kitchen holding her glove over her head.

He looked back at Maddie. “How much time we got?”

“About a half an hour.”

“Perfect.” Taking Bree’s glove out of her hand, he placed it on his head like a hat as he picked her up with one hand and held his beer with the other. “Let’s go turn you into a pro, girl.”

Bree’s giggles followed them out the back door and Maddie turned to Karen with a wistful smile when the door closed behind them. “Thank you. You see what I would be missing?”

“He seems perfect for you, Mad. That’s for sure.”

“Now I just need to not screw this up.”

“That’s the game plan.”

Chapter Thirteen

After dinner, they all sat around the table in the backyard enjoying small talk as Karen and Chase slowly became comfortable with each other. Bree sat with them for a while before the conversation became uninteresting to her.

“I’m going to watch TV,” she announced before jumping up from her chair and trotting through the back door.

Maddie raised one brow in surprise. “I guess we bore her.”

“She wasn’t the center of attention so she’s outta here,” Karen said with a smile.

“Nah, she’s jealous that she can’t get Chase to herself.” Maddie smiled as she leaned over and gave him a quick kiss.

Karen nodded in agreement. “Three beautiful women vying for your attention. How do you handle it, Chase?”

“It’s a tough problem to have,” he said with a smirk.

“Well, I’m going to hit the road,” Karen said as she stood up with a stretch. Reaching across the table, she pulled Maddie into a hug. “Thanks for everything. Love you.”

“Thank
you
.”

“I’ll see you, Mr. Baseball,” she said as she stuck out her hand.

Chase grinned as he shook her hand. “See you around.”

Maddie and Chase watched as she walked through the back door and into the house before turning toward each other. Placing his beer on the table in front of him, Chase reached for her hand as he lifted her out of her chair and pulled her down into his lap. Nuzzling her, he gave her a soft kiss.

“I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too,” she said sighing as she rested her head against his.

“It’s going to suck going on our road trip. I can’t imagine not seeing you for two weeks.” His voice was low and husky as he leaned back and looked up to the dark sky.

“I know what you mean.”

He looked back at her, his expression serious. “You can trust me, you know? Nothing’s going to happen.”

She looked into his solemn, dark eyes and nodded. “I know,” she said in a whisper.

“Why do you not sound convincing?”

Maddie heaved a deep breath and sat up in his lap. “I’m sure Karen said something to you.”

“About?”

“She must have threatened you with bodily damage not to say anything.” When he didn’t respond, she gave a small nod. “You’re keeping your word with her, I can respect that.”

Standing up, she walked over to the edge of the patio and looked out into her backyard, which was lost in the darkness of the night. “I’m scared, Chase. I’m scared of us working out and I’m scared of us not working out.” She looked back at him. “It isn’t an issue of trust. I believe you when you say I can trust you, but the problem is I don’t know if you can trust me. And I don’t mean that I’m going to go out with some other man or something, but I don’t know that you can trust me to be strong enough for us, to fight for us.”

He remained where he was. “I think you’re wrong. I think you are strong enough. You just have to believe in yourself.”

Maddie shook her head and looked down at her feet before turning around and facing him. “If everything was like it is right now, then I wouldn’t be worried about anything. But it isn’t going to be, we’re out there now, and I keep waiting for all the cards to fall.”

“Maddie, as long as you and I are happy and this is what we want, that’s all that matters. It’s just us that matters.”

“But it isn’t just us, Chase. Even if everything between us was perfect, what about everybody else? All the comments? The stares? The doubt? And that’s going to be just the beginning.”

“Are you going to let others live your life for you? Who are they to say what’s right for you and what isn’t? If it makes you happy, if
I
make you happy, who cares what others say? I don’t.”

“What about your parents? Can you honestly tell me they’re going to be happy with you dating a woman more than a decade older than you?” He didn’t answer immediately and she jumped all over that. “See? I told you. It isn’t as easy as you try to make it sound.”

“No, I don’t think it’s going to be easy. I’ve never said that, but I’m not going to let ‘what ifs’ defeat us before we can even get started. My parents...” Chase shrugged as he mulled it over in his head. “Of course they’ll have some concerns, but once they see how happy I am and it’s what I want, they’ll be supportive. I have no doubt of that.”

Maddie turned back toward her yard in frustration. “It’s not only that. It’s you and where you are in your life. It’s me and where I’m at in my life. We’re at opposite ends of the spectrum. You have so much to live for, so much ahead of you and I’d be in your way.”

He finally stood up and walked over to her, irritation edging into his voice. “Jesus, Maddie. You make it sound like you’re eighty years old and nearing the end of your life. You’re thirty-four and you still have your whole life ahead of you, too. I’m just a little bit behind, that’s all.”

“I’m jaded, Chase. I’ve been married and gone through all of that. I have a family. You’re going to want all of that.”

Chase put his hands on his hips and frowned. “Okay, true, but I’m failing to understand what your previous marriage has to do with us.”

“I have emotional baggage from that. You know that.”

“And we’ll work through that together.”

He stared down at her expectantly and she started to lose her steam. “Okay...well, you’ll want kids...one day...and I’m...too old...”

He shook his head in frustration. “Maddie, you’re thirty-four! There are plenty of women out there who have kids, even their first one, around your age or older. Stop trying to age yourself exponentially. You’re worrying about shit we haven’t even gotten to yet, but you want to talk about it now, fine. I’m more than ready to.” He loomed over her. “Do you not want any more kids?”

“Well...,” she stammered. She took a deep breath and let herself believe. “Yes, I would like more kids.”

Chase threw his arms up. “Then what the hell are we arguing about?”

“I...well, I was saying...” She paused. “Damn it, how do you do that?”

“What? Think reasonably?”

Her lips twitched in amusement as she took a friendly swat at him. “You’re an ass!”

Chase chuckled as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply. Standing back, he shook his head at her. “Stop trying to end us before we even have a chance. You’re too good for me to lose.”

“I’m sorry. I can’t stop my brain.” Maddie smiled as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his lips down to hers. Groaning, she pulled away reluctantly. “Do you really have to go away for two weeks?”

“I do and I hate it.” She settled against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her and leaned down to rest his chin on top of her head. “I’m really going to miss you.”

“I already miss you.” She stood back and grabbed his hand pulling him into the house. “Come on, let’s get Bree into bed.”

“And then?”

She gave him a flirty grin over her shoulder. “And then we can see if we can give you a proper goodbye.”

* * *

The next morning, Maddie got dressed and busied herself doing little stuff around the house as she waited for Chase. He was leaving in a couple of hours for his extended road trip and even though they’d said their big goodbyes the night before, he’d still wanted to stop by before heading to the airport. Since he was going to be gone for two weeks, she was more than happy that he would be coming by one last time.

As she fussed around in the kitchen, there was a knock at the front door and her heart skipped a beat in excitement. She wondered if she would ever stop smiling like a fool whenever he was around. She hoped she didn’t.

Walking into the front room, her stomach dropped to her feet when she recognized who was standing on her doorstep. It didn’t help that Bree had raced up the hallway, her face lit with joy, expecting her hero to be standing on the other side of the door.

She took a deep breath and held out her hand. “Stay there, Bree.”

Maddie took another deep breath before plastering her brightest smile on her face, even though she knew this was not going to be a friendly visit. It seemed the moment she’d been dreading ever since the media had taken an interest in her and Chase had finally arrived.

“Sandy, what a surprise. Please come in.”

Maddie didn’t miss the piercing glare her niece gave her as she held open the screen door. Leaving the storm door open, she waited for the onslaught she knew was about to come.

Sandy whirled on her and shook a newspaper in the air over her head. “How could you do this?”

“It isn’t what you think, Sandy.”

“It isn’t what I think?” she scoffed. “My aunt stole my boyfriend! How can that not be what I think? The proof is right here.” She shook the newspaper clutched in her hand for emphasis.

She started to reach out and touch her niece’s hand, but quickly stopped, knowing Sandy wouldn’t recognize it as a gesture of peace or reassurance. “I assure you, Sandy. I didn’t steal your boyfriend. Everything that happened between Chase and I started after Chase had already explained to you that he didn’t want any more than a friendship.”

“You’re a liar!” she yelled as she stomped away from Maddie. “I can’t believe this. You’ve actually stolen my boyfriend. You’re such a whore!” Sandy wheeled back, her eyes cold. “What’s the matter, Aunt Maddie? You couldn’t find anyone your own age so you had to seduce a younger man?”

Maddie hissed a breath through her nose and fought for control. Her niece was angry so she was striking to hurt, she could understand that, but the words still stung. “I understand you’re upset, Sandy. Maybe we should talk about this when you’ve had a chance to cool down.”

“Talk about this! Talk about what? How you’re a whore?”

“Bree, go to your room, please,” a deep voice said from behind them.

Maddie and Sandy spun around as Chase opened the screen door with a dark look on his face. Bree looked anxiously between her mother and cousin, but didn’t move.

“Go on, Bree,” he said giving her a light shove, his tone leaving no room for argument.

She looked at her mom again, her eyes bright with apprehension, before running down the hall to her room and slamming the door. Once she was out of earshot, Chase walked over to stand next to Maddie, his stare cold and hard on Sandy. “You owe your aunt an apology.”

“An apology?” Sandy sneered. “For what? She’s the one who should be apologizing.”

“I’m not going to say it again. Apologize.”

She threw her head back and snorted. “Whatever. I’m not apologizing.”

“It’s okay, Chase,” Maddie said as she touched his arm, trying to calm the storm she could sense brewing inside him.

“No, it isn’t okay. First of all, she needs to get it through her head that she and I were never dating and secondly, she needs to apologize for calling you a whore, especially in front of Bree.”

“Chase, really, give her a moment...”

He aimed his hard glare at her. “No, Maddie, I will not give her a moment. She has no right to come in to your house and talk to you like that. Just because she’s a spoiled brat who didn’t get her way doesn’t mean she can talk to you that way.”

“Fuck you, Chase!” Sandy spit at him.

He spun back to Sandy, rage apparent in the tight lines of his face. “Get it through your thick skull, Sandy, that this has nothing to do with you. I would have thought you’d be happy for your aunt, happy that she’s happy, but no, you can’t be supportive like that, can you? If it isn’t all about you, then fuck it, right?”

“This is lame. I can see you’re all happy here playing house together. Maybe I should thank you, Aunt Maddie, for being a slut and freeing me from this loser. I’m out of here.” She stormed out the door leaving them looking after her wake.

Hearing Sandy’s car start up and roar down the street, Maddie slumped down on the couch. It had gone worse than she could have expected. It was bad enough that Sandy had slung around ugly words, which she probably deserved, but to have had Chase and Bree witness it made it unbearable.

“You can’t let people talk to you like that, Maddie.”

She took a deep breath before she looked at him standing over her. “Chase, she was hurt. She’s a young girl. She’s going to say things like that.”

“Don’t make excuses for her.”

“Excuses? I’m not making excuses. I’m just trying to see things from her perspective.” She could feel her anger starting to build. “I didn’t need you to come in and stand up for me.”

“Yeah, it looked like you were handling things perfectly.”

She shot off the couch and poked his chest. “I was handling things fine before you walked in. And speaking of that, you didn’t need to talk to Bree that way.”

A glint in his eye told her he was reaching his boiling point, but he quickly brought it under control. “I’m sorry, but I didn’t think you’d want her to hear you being called a whore.”

His words had her anger quickly fizzing out, leaving her sagging. She slumped forward and leaned her head against his chest. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I’m angry, hurt and taking it out on you.” Maddie looked up as Chase put his arms around her. “You did the right thing. I didn’t know what to say. I was more shocked than anything.”

He pulled her in tightly. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that. She was way out of line though.”

“I know, but she’s young. Add to that spoiled and always used to getting her way. She’s only going to see it from her perspective and how she’s been wronged.”

“How bad is it going to be with your sister?”

Maddie felt cold dread fall over her at the thought. She could only imagine how bad it was going to be and even at that, it was probably going to be ten times worse. “It’s going to be very bad.”

He pulled back and looked down at her. “I’m sorry I have to go out of town. I want to be here to help you with this.”

“I know you do, but who knows? She may show up tomorrow or it may take her a few weeks. You just never know. It depends on how personally she takes it—which, if Sandy’s display is any indication, is going to be pretty personally. It may take her a while to build up her arguments.”

Chase shook his head. “They shouldn’t do this to you. They should be happy that you’re happy. They should want you to be happy.”