I looked at Calico from head to toe. I thought back to the first time I'd seen him.
Boy, you just don't know. If you came home with me tonight, you'll be handing over the keys to your Benz tomorrow. As horny and drunk as I am, who knows the tricks I would turn tonight?
My thoughts were interrupted by Touch's call.
“Jewel, come on, I'm taking you home.” He pulled my hand with his right hand, and my purse sat comfortable on his left wrist, just like it belonged there.
Calico followed behind us as we walked to my truck. Touch unlocked the door and threw my purse and cell phone on the driver's seat.
I climbed in the passenger side and began to fumble with my iPod as I waited for him to gather some things from his car.
“Oh shit,” I yelled as Calico tapped on my window, nearly scaring me to death.
He opened the door. “Let me see your phone.”
I reached over and grabbed my phone from the driver's seat and handed it to him without hesitation. I'd been a bitch enough for the night. Now it was time to settle down and handle business.
Calico entered and stored his number, called his phone, then handed me my phone back. “Can I get a call tomorrow?” he asked.
The words, “You sure can,” slurred from my tongue, as my head began to spin.
“Cool. Have a good night, sweetie.” Calico buckled me in and closed the door.
Touch hopped in and gave Calico a wave as we pulled out of the parking lot.
As quickly as we pulled out, I was knocked out. When I opened my eyes we were in front of my home.
“Come on, drunken monkey.” Touch dragged me from the truck and into the house.
As soon as I opened the door, I was met by a ringing house phone. My head still spinning, I couldn't make it past where Touch had laid me on the couch.
Touch grabbed a pillow and blanket for me and placed the pillows beneath my head, and the blanket over my body. “You need anything?” He grabbed a Heineken from the refrigerator and popped it open.
I noticed my cell phone was now ringing off the hook. “My purse.”
Touch passed me my purse then headed to my bathroom to relieve himself yet again.
By the time I'd pulled my phone from my purse, I'd missed the call. I looked at my list of missed calls. I had ten missed calls, seven from Sasha, and three from a private number that I was sure was Sasha as well.
Damn! I forgot to give her that money I promised.
I immediately called her back.
“What the hell are you doing?” Sasha said as soon as she picked up.
“Cut this bullshit right now. I'm drunk,” I snapped back.
“Obviously,” Sasha stated. “When are you going home?”
“I am home.”
“I'm on my way,” she said, as though I'd invited her to come over or something. Then she hung up.
Touch sat an empty garbage can next to me and finished up his Heineken. “You straight?”
“Yeah, I'm good. Sasha is on her way.”
“Good. 'Cause ol' girl is blowing my phone up. I'm out, bay.” Touch gave me a hug then set the alarm to the house and locked the door behind him.
Â
Â
“You stink!”
I thought I was dreaming, until I opened my eyes to a tiny blurred butter pecan five-foot frame with curly hair that stood before me. As my vision cleared, I saw Sasha standing in front of me, her hands on her hips. Not wanting to be bothered with her nonsense, I immediately grabbed my purse and pulled out my wallet. I didn't say a word to her as I counted the cash in my purse. Seeing that I only had three hundred in cash, I pulled out my checkbook.
“Uh-uh.” Sasha shook her head. “Don't write me no check.”
“All I got is three hundred on me, Sasha. I figured if you came all the way out here in the middle of the night, you would expect to leave with the entire amount.” Personally, I figured it wasn't that serious and she could have waited until the next day.
I guess she thought the same thing when she replied, “I'll just get it tomorrow,” and then walked into the bathroom.
I could hear the water running from the bathtub faucet shortly after. Sasha yelled from the bathroom, “Who the hell been here?”
“How the hell you get in here?” I answered with a question, realizing I didn't let her in.
“I used the spare hidden beneath the rock. Now back to my question, please.”
“And the alarm?”
“One, two, three, four. You use the same pass code for everything, bank account pin number, voice mail, alarm.
I mumbled loud enough for Sasha to hear, “Umph. Note to self, change all pass codes tomorrow, especially voice mail.”
“Jewel, I know a nigga been here. So who was it?” she asked again.
“Why?”
“I know you ain't bring that nigga home from the bar.” Sasha walked back into the living room.
“You think you know so fucking much, don't you?” I sat up on the couch and headed into the bathroom.
Sasha was right on my heels. “So who was it, Jewel?”
“Gotdamit! It was Touch.” I realized Sasha wasn't gonna let it rest. “Is this for me?” I touched the water that filled the bathtub to test the warmth then turned the faucet off.
“Yes.”
I got undressed and slowly stepped in the steaming hot water. Once I got comfortable in the tub, I rested my head against the bath pillow and closed my eyes.
A few minutes later Sasha returned. She reached over me and grabbed the shea butter body wash and loofah sponge. She lathered the sponge and began to wash my body.
Five minutes later I was rinsing the soap off and wrapping my bath up. I dried off, threw on a robe, and gave my teeth a much-needed brushing, and rinsing with Listerine. Now it was definitely time for bed.
I walked into the bedroom and took off my robe, sliding in bed beside a naked Sasha, who wrapped her arm around me and began licking the lobe of my left ear.
I grabbed her arm and gently placed it beside her and rolled over. I did it for a few of reasons. One, I was drunk as hell and not in the mood. We had gotten down like this once before, and it was good, but I really didn't prefer the girl-on-girl thing. And, two, I was no trick. I didn't need a fuck to give her that money she asked for.
“What's wrong with you?”
“Nothing. Go to sleep, Sasha.”
“Go to sleep? Do I look like a child to you?”
“No, but sometimes you act like one.”
Sasha had turned me off from the time she'd walked in the door, not to mention how she irritated me with this whole quit-my-career job-to-take-up-dancing decision she'd made earlier in the day.
I'd first met Sasha about a year and a half ago. I had gone with one of the niggas from my team to the club she happened to work at. It was time for her act as we walked in. She was sexy and turned me on. Our eyes were locked on each other her entire performance.
When she was done with her set, she came over, and we talked for a while. She even gave my dude a lap-dance. When I was getting ready to leave, she wrote her cell phone number on a napkin and gave it to me, telling me that I could call her anytime.
I always tried to take a picture of a new person I was putting in my phone, so I know who's calling. When I asked her to pose for the picture, she turned around and bent down, showing me her thong and fat ass. I laughed at the gesture, took the picture and then gave her my number. The next day, she called me and invited me to come to the mall with her. The rest is history.
Everything was cool for a while, but it seemed like the more I learned about her and the closer we got, the more she turned me off. And this particular night, her mouth was really pushing me over the edge.
Sasha sat up in the bed and began to yell, “What? Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?”
“You notice you're the only one yelling? You might want to bring it down a couple of notches and stop cussing at me.” I constantly had to remind Sasha to watch the way she talked to me. Besides being with a tired-ass man, her anger was her biggest downfall.
Sasha let out a big sigh and flopped back down on the bed. I could hear her sniffles, a true sign she was crying.
Fuck! Now I got to kiss this bitch ass!
“Why you crying, Boobie?” I rolled over and pulled her close to me.
“I'm just so stressed-out. I know you don't deserve to be talked to like that. You never cuss or yell at me. You're always so calm no matter how much I go off. I'm sorry, Jewel.”
“It's all good,” I said, although deep down inside I really wanted to tell her about herself.
“That's why I love you.”
Sasha rolled on top of me and kissed me passionately, her kisses traveling from my lips to my breast and ending with an explosion between my thighs. “Sweet dreams,” she whispered in my ears and wiped my wetness from her lips.
Chapter 2
“Truth Be Told”
Sasha
Â
Â
“Jewel, your phone,” I mumbled, bothered by the constant ring of her house phone. She didn't even budge as I sat up in the bed and looked around the room for the cordless phone.
My first thought was the nightstand. “Nope, not there,” I said to myself as I continued to search. The phone wasn't on the cradle, but I could hear it was near. I noticed the time as I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was nine o'clock in the morning.
Who the hell would be calling Jewel so persistently and so early on a damn Saturday?
Shit never seemed right from the night before, so I made it my business to find out who was calling. I got out of the bed and followed the sound of the ringing phone. It led me to the walk-in closet. I opened the closet door and saw the phone sitting on top of some shoeboxes.
I shook my head as I picked the phone up. For a chick that always complained she didn't have shit to wear, she surely had an overflowing closet. I shuffled through a few pair of jeans that still had the tags on them; two hundred thirty dollars was the cheapest pair. Hell, that was about how much I owed on my past due phone bill.
As I walked out the closet, I scanned through the caller ID to see who had been calling all morning. I flipped to the last person that called and stopped there. The caller ID read: Griffith, Shakira.
“Shakira Griffith,” I said, knowing exactly who it was. “Jewel.” I walked over to the bed and shook her as though I was trying to give her shaken baby syndrome.
Jewel sat up and looked at me as though she wanted to smack me. “What, Sasha, what?”
“The feeling's mutual, mama,” I said, letting her know I was just as pissed as she was. “Why the fuck is skank-ass Paradise calling you?” I addressed Shakira by her dance name purposely, trying to demean her.
“Why not? And why the fuck you all in my caller ID?” Jewel stood up and snatched the phone from my hand.
Her sexy, naked frame caught my eye for a second, but it wasn't enough to distract my focus from the conversation at hand. She knew damn well how I felt about Paradise, and I wasn't gonna let this shit ride.
Paradise to the strip scene, Shakira Griffith was a young chick that Jewel and I both knew from the strip club. She and Jewel claimed they had this “little sister-big sister” friendship, but I'd always believed it was more to it.
I for one knew exactly how those so-called “sister” friendships worked. I was once like Paradise, young, fresh, and naïve to the strip world. Then my girl Ceazia came and took me under her wing. She was a big sister to me too. Until we became lovers. She was my first and would have been my only, if she hadn't had passed away.
So when I saw the way Jewel and Paradise made eye contact with each other when Paradise was on stage dancing, I knew exactly what was about to come of their so-called sisterly friendship. It was as though they were the only two people in the club and no one else mattered. They acted like they wanted to jump on top of each other right then and there. That look was way too familiar to me because it was the same attraction that me and Jewel shared when we'd first met. And to think they had the nerve to say Paradise didn't even swing that way. Well, one thing for sure, if she wasn't already there, she was on her way.
“Why the fuck is she calling, Jewel?” I asked again following Jewel into the bathroom.
“That's what friends do, Sasha. Don't you call?”
“Are you insinuating that we are on the same level? If so, I can take that one or two ways, either I'm just a friend, or she's your lover. So which one is it, Jewel?”
I grabbed a robe for myself and handed another one to her, and we both threw them on.
“No. You are crazy.” She laughed and shook her head as she began to brush her teeth.
I didn't know if Jewel was intentionally trying to rub me the wrong way or what, but she was really starting to piss me off. “You're right, I am crazy. I'm crazy for thinking I could trust your ass. I should have known what was up from the jump. I mean, I did meet you at the strip club.”
After Jewel rinsed her mouth and washed her face, she said, “So what?”
“So, I had to be crazy for hollering at someone from the strip club. Just like you had me, now you're scoping out the next bitch, Paradise.”
“I had you? More like you had me. Did you forget you were my first? You sought me, Sasha.”
“Yeah, and now it's like you've lost your fucking mind.
“You got a taste, and now you're so confident, you're seeking pussy, huh? Yeah, I had to be crazy to think you and I could really have something.”
“What? Are you serious? Nah, boo. You crazy for being with that nothing-ass nigga of yours.” Jewel headed into the living room.
I couldn't believe Jewel went there. I knew she always wanted to say something about Rick. I was just waiting for the day. “You happy? You finally said it. You finally got it off those thirty-six D's. Do you feel better now? I knew you felt that way about him anyway.”
“Oh, that's just the beginning. To be honest, I think he is less than a man. You haven't been the same since he moved in with you. You don't keep yourself up, you always broke, you never go out. On the real, I hardly even talk to you. It's like you gotta sneak and call or something, and when you do call, it's because you need something.” Jewel paused then shook her head. “And how the fuck you got a nigga living with you, yet you got to dance in Atlanta just to keep from losing your house? What good is a nigga if he can't do shit for you? What you wantâdick? Dick don't pay the bills, boo.”
I finally had to tell Jewel how I felt about her using men for money. “I'm sorry, I don't fuck for moneyâI fuck for love. That âgaming-a-nigga' shit is your style.”
“Ha-ha-ha!” Jewel laughed as though I'd told a hilarious joke. “Baby, let me explain something to you. Listen carefully because this is some real knowledge I'm about spit to you. But, before I begin let me just say, don't forget where you came from. If I'm not mistaken, gaming a nigga is how you got your money back in the day. Now, before I get down to business, let me just point out a few things to you. I drive a Range Rover, I own my own condo in a gated community here in Kempsville Greens, and I am a ghostwriter but have a background in certified medical billing and coding. I have a closet full of designer labels, and I have investments and a nice chunk of savings. I have no children and have no problem paying my bills. And all this comfort at a sweet age of twenty-three. So I think we all can agree that I am accomplished.
“Now, my secret to success is, I started with me. I made sure I had something solid that I could always fall back on. I have an education and a career. Then I used the power of my beauty and my booty to take things to the next level. If you want to call it fucking for money, fine, but I beg to differ. One of the standards I have for my men is that they have money, and plenty of it. So the way I see it, mami, if you wanna fuck for love, love his money. Or, better yet, fuck for the love of money. Phrase it however you like, but you better get with it.”
Jewel ran down the law to me like she had invented the game herself.
“Well, Rick was there for me for five years when he had money, and now just because he's down, you want me to kick him out? And, did we forget, this is my baby father we're talking about?”
“Nope, not at all. But you need to do you. Fuck that nigga. He can't even take care of his son.” Jewel walked over to answer her ringing cell phone.
I walked up to her and began staring her in the face. “We're in the middle of a conversation, Jewel. That shit can wait.”
She attempted to answer. “Hello?”
“Give me the muthafuckin' phone.” I tried grabbing the phone from her ear.
“Hello?” she called out again. She directed her attention back to me after realizing she'd missed the call. “Yo, you are really bugging.”
“I know you fucking that bitch Paradise too,” I said. Since I'd been speaking my mind all morning, there was no sense in holding that in.
“Your mind is real fucked-up, Sasha!”
“Fuck you!” I yelled. That's all I could form my mouth to say.
“Besides, if I'm fucking Shakira, why are you here?” Jewel gave me a plain look.
“You right,” I said without thinking, and began to get dress.
It took all I had to keep my tears in. There was no way I was going to let Jewel see me cry. I had my clothes on in two minutes flat and was headed out the door.
She yelled, “Key, please,” as soon as I opened the door.
I reached in my pocket and pulled out the single key and tossed it on the counter. I ran to my car and rushed out the neighborhood.
I pulled in the gas station on the corner and burst into tears. I didn't know what was wrong. So much was running through my mind at once. I loved Jewel, but I just didn't feel like she loved me the same. Little did she know, if she just loved me wholeheartedly, I would leave Rick and be with her. But she would rather fuck a nigga for money than kick it with me.
I couldn't help but compare our relationship with my relationship with Ceazia, a lover and my best friend that I loved her with all my heart. I would've done anything for her. My relationship with Jewel was almost similar to my last one, but for the life of me, I just couldn't understand why she didn't feel the same. Then to think she may be the first to sleep with Paradise was even more nerve-wracking.
I knew Jewel had my back in time of need, but I just didn't feel that connection I wanted. Here I was crying over her, but I was sure she had never shed a tear over me. Hell, at times I even felt like she resented me, or like I just wasn't good enough. It was like I lived in her shadow or something.
From the time I'd met her, everything was so perfect for her. And it seemed like every chance she got, she was throwing it in my face.
“Fuck that nigga. Dick don't pay the bills. I drive a Range Rover.” Blah, blah, blah.
My pity began to turn to anger, the more I thought.
“Fuck that shit. Jewel is no better than me,” I said, giving myself a pep talk. “Little does she know, easy come, easy go. Just as fast as she got on top, in a blink of an eye, she could be on the bottom. And when she hit, I'll be sure to be on top, so then it will be me she'll be crying to.”
That was all the motivation I needed. My mind was made up. I was going to get on the grind, dancing in Atlanta and New York, and get shit back to the way it used to be.
I wiped my face and got myself together then looked above, asking Ceazia, who was now my angel above, for help. “I need you,
C
. I know you got my back.”