The Brightest Star in the Highlands: Jennie and Aedan (Clan Grant Series Book 7) (17 page)

Sweat dripped down his back as the stress of what he was about to say clawed at him. “Jennie?” She turned her gaze back to him, and that movement alone struck him square in the chest.

“Aye?”

“Would you like to go for a stroll with me?” He needed to get outside into the coolness of the night air, to see if he could set things right after the mess he made earlier.

She peered at him for a long moment before nodding. Turning to Robbie, she said, “Aedan and I are going for a short stroll.”

Robbie nodded. “Do not forget she has three brothers inside the keep, Cameron.”

“Trust me, ‘twould be difficult to remove that fact from my mind.” He held his arm out for Jennie and then led her toward the door.

He headed straight for the portcullis this time, declaring that he would not put himself in the position of being interrupted again. This time, he would talk to her alone with no one around to overhear him.

Once outside, they headed toward the small forest near the loch, following a path oft used for the horses. Tonight it was deserted.

Jennie glanced up at the sky. “Your stars are out in full, Aedan.”

Aedan mumbled, “Aye, I’m aware.”

Jennie seemed vexed.

“What is it? Why the face?” he asked.

She let out a deep sigh. “Because I know not what you are about. In Lochluin, we looked at the stars together and talked about them. You made me feel cherished. But where is the man I strolled with on that night, the man who held me close? Where is your excitement, the thrill you took in the heavens, all the things you loved to talk about? Do you have any idea how much I treasure my memories of that night?”

Aedan couldn’t answer. He stared at the ground and paused to lean against a tree, trying to remember all the things Neil had told him to say, of all the wrong things he had said earlier. Hellfire, but the lass made it hard for him to talk.

“Aedan, I thought you liked me, you say you wish to offer for me, but this—” she held her hands out to him, “—is not the man I met on the hill. I do not know where he has gone, but he has surely left me.”

“Where is he?” Aedan’s exasperation and frustration finally overflowed. “Where is he?” He paced in a circle in front of the tree, running his fingers through his hair, his mind turned to sheer mush.

“I’ll tell you where he is,” he finally said. “He is trying to say the right thing to someone he cares about, but he cannot. His mind is muddled, and his tongue is completely twisted whenever he glances at you. And the reason is that every time he looks at the stars in the sky, all he sees is you. I look at the brightest star up above and I see
you
. If I notice a cluster of twinkling bodies in one corner of the sky, then it reminds me of the freckles on the bridge of your nose. When I glance at the shapes that used to resemble warriors and dancers, now all I see are your lips and your smile. I know you wish to hear tender words from me when I am with you, but I have naught to say. I am useless at this. I have never been a warrior, yet I would rather fight ten men with my sword then face you and come up with a few kind words. I know naught of what to say or what you wish to hear.”

“Aedan,” she strode over and cupped his face.

“What?” he said through clenched teeth. “You see? I muddled it again.”

The expression on her face turned to wonder. “Nay, you did not. Those are the sweetest words you could have ever said to me.”

“They are?”

“Aye, you compared me to something I know holds a special place in your heart. I could never ask for more.” She kissed him, a tender kiss that calmed his tremors. “I only wanted to know how you truly felt.”

“You know I love you. I’ll just make a mess of saying so.” He pulled back, grabbed her hands, and leaned his forehead to hers, closing his eyes. “Jennie Grant, I want you with all my being. You are a refuge from a cruel world for me, and I would love naught more than to make you mine. But I must return to my lands after I speak with Alex.”

“You have not asked him for my hand yet?”

“Nay, he is too distraught over his wife. He never settles. But I must remind you that you never gave me your response earlier. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife if your brother accepts me?”

Jennie smiled. “Aye, Aedan. Naught would make me happier. I love you.”

He pulled her in for a kiss, and his lips caressed hers in an intimate dance, moving with them in such a way that a fire roared to life in his belly. He wanted her more than he had ever wanted anything.

Jennie pulled away, her breathing short. “Then make me yours, Aedan.”

“Jennie, I cannot. An honorable man does not make a lass his before he stands in front of a priest with her, and I will not dishonor you. I will ask your brother for your hand when he gives me the chance. But before then, nay.”

“Then handfast with me.”

“Handfast? Not many still practice handfasting, Jennie. I live near an abbey, so I would have a difficult time justifying why I did not just return to my lands and marry you honorably.”

“Brodie did it.”

He stood back and stared at her, unable to believe he had heard her correctly. “What? Your brother? And Alex accepted it?”

“Aye. ‘Twas a special circumstance, but Brodie and Celestina fell in love. Alex handfasted them because ‘twas the only way they could make sure her other marriage would be null and void.”

“If Alex would hear me out, I believe he would support our marriage. I am not going to dishonor you by asking your brother to marry us outside the church.”

“But even if he approves, we will not marry until everything is settled on your lands. Would be foolish. You’ve said you need to get back. Your clan could be going to war just as the Scots were going to war with the Norse. ‘Tis why Alex allowed it. There was a war brewing then, just as there is now.”

“Alex will not handfast us.”

“Nay, you are correct.” Her fingers drummed on her lips. “But Alex is too distraught over Maddie to make any major decisions.”

Aedan waited. Her face was a portrait of conflicting emotions as she struggled to find a way to make this right. “Jennie, ‘tis all right. If you will have me, all I ask is that you wait for me until our battles are over. Then I will marry you proper.”

“I have it.” A wide grin crossed her face as she paced back and forth, her arms swinging with excitement.

“What? How could you possibly have found a way?” He was astounded at her declaration.

“We’ll handfast to each other. In the law of the Scots, ‘tis binding for a year and a day. Brodie and Celestina told me all about it. We do not need witnesses. We must only pledge ourselves to each other.” She tugged the red ribbon out of her hair and wrapped it around Aedan’s hand and hers, intertwining the ends. “Aedan Cameron,” she began, “I pledge my love to you for a year and a day, and if you choose to end our marriage at that time, I will honor your choice.”

“‘Tis all I need to do? Pledge myself to you?” This could not be right, and doubts flashed in and out of his mind.

“Aye. You must pledge your love for me. ‘Tis enough and Alex and the church will honor our commitment when we can marry.”

“And will you deny all the suitors your brother brings your way while I’m gone?” The thought of her in another man’s arms was too much for him, especially if he had to leave.

“Aye. I have no interest in another, just you. There will be no other suitors. I will insist.”

Aedan paused for a moment, realizing that this was what he wanted more than anything. He was in love with Jennie Grant. While he was willing to sacrifice many things for his people, this was the one thing he wanted for himself. The one thing he was not willing to give up. After a long hard look at their hands, he rubbed his thumb across her tender skin. “Aye, I pledge my love for you, Jennie Grant, and I will honor and protect you all my life. If you choose to end this in a year and a day, I will not fight you unless we have a bairn from our love.”

His chest swelled with happiness when he saw the gleam in her eye. Jennie untied the ribbon and placed it back in her hair. He wanted to commit himself to her, to share his life with her, both the glories and the difficult times. His lips descended on hers in a searing kiss, and she melted into him, her knees buckling as he tasted her sweet mouth. A soft mewling sound came from her throat, and he picked her up and carried her to a soft mound of leaves, settling her under the trees near the loch. The night was warm, fortunately, but he would gladly give her the heat of his body.

After undoing the laces of her dress, he tugged at it until it fell from her shoulders and trailed a line of kisses across her shoulder and down to her breast. She reached for his leine. He unclasped the brooch securing his plaid and arranged it on the ground, then stood to rid himself of his leine and his breeches, tossing his boots aside in a second. When he finished, he turned to his wife and was pleased to see she didn’t look away at all.

“Do you like what you see, wife?”

Chapter Seventeen

Jennie couldn’t take her eyes off her husband. The flesh of his body was sheer beauty to her. A small tuft of dark hair covered his chest, and the flat plane of his belly led her eyes down to his manhood, and she grinned, knowing that his hardness was all the evidence she needed that he wanted her. He knelt in front of her and helped her remove her clothing as she touched him everywhere she could, reveling in her sudden boldness. Her hands felt as if they had always belonged where they were now, caressing his skin, leading him to this dance they would do together as one.

He took her lips in his again and urged her down onto the soft plaid. His mouth took a path down her breast, and he laved her nipple until she squirmed, wanting so much more from him. Her hands threaded through his hair, tugging him closer as moans of sheer pleasure left her. Taking her sensitive bud in his mouth, he suckled her until she cried out, then nudged his knee between her legs, opening her for him.

“Jennie, you know…”

“I know, Aedan. Just do it fast.”

His hands found her folds and he plunged a finger inside her. She spread her legs wide to give him more access, wanting so much more of him, but unsure of how it all was to take place. She followed his lead and watched as he positioned himself near her entrance, maneuvering his way inside her just a touch before burying himself in her sheath. The intrusion made her gasp, but the pain was little compared to the pleasure that thrummed through her body at his invasion.

“Tell me when it does not hurt. I’m sorry.”

He clenched his jaw as he hovered over her, his weight balanced on his elbows. Once the pain dissipated, she moved against him. Groaning, he pulled back and buried himself deep inside her, his breath heated against her neck.

“More, Cameron. Do it again, and faster.”

He thrust inside her, fast and hard, until she thought she could tolerate no more. He reached down and caressed a spot near her core and she screamed as all her pleasure points shrieked with joy, sending waves of sheer bliss pulsating though her body. She heard him growl and shout her name as he gave in to his own pleasure.

He kissed her forehead, her nose, and her lips, then nuzzled her neck while she sighed in contentment.

Aedan Cameron was hers.

***

Aedan was awakened in the middle of the night and led down to Alex’s solar. Exhaustion weighed down his limbs, but he stopped brushing the sleep out of his eyes as soon as he saw Logan and Gwyneth.

“Problems?” he asked, his glance moving from Alex to Logan. Neil came in behind him, having also been awakened

“Aye. Two problems. Your mother has been injured, but ‘tis minor,” Logan said.

“And the other?” Aedan’s hands gripped the chair in front of him, his knuckles turning white. Hellfire, he could not get away from trouble, even far away in the Highlands. He knew it had been foolish to hope for a brief interlude with Jennie.

“The attack has been moved up. You must return home. Gwynie and I have come up with a plan. We have discussed it with Alex and he has given us his approval. We’re quite sure this will unmask the traitor and help you keep your lands. ‘Tis foolproof in my eyes.”

Aedan didn’t even think of checking with Alex before he made his next move since they had come to an understanding the night before. “Neil, go wake Jennie.”

Alex stood. “Nay. Jennie stays here. You’ll come for her later, once the battle had been won.”

Aedan, stunned, looked to the others for guidance. Logan said, “We’ll tell you of the plan on the way. ‘Tis better if Jennie is not there. Trust us. It will upset her to be left behind, but she’ll be better for it.”

Against his better judgment, he decided to trust them. Actually, he had no choice. If he wanted Grant’s guards to save his clan, he would have to do as Alex asked. “All right. Alex, please explain to Jennie why I have left and that I will return for her as soon as possible?”

Alex nodded. “I’ll uphold up my end of the agreement. Now you must do as I ask. She’ll deal with it.”

With a sinking feeling in his gut, Aedan left.

***

Jennie woke up the next morn with a smile on her face. She and Aedan were now married in every sense of the word. Well, except for one—they had not yet received a priest’s blessing. She hadn’t dared to tell her brothers the truth, though Brodie had raised an eyebrow at their long absence. He had been the only one awaiting their return. Robbie and Caralyn had left for their cottage, and Alex was sitting with Maddie while Alice settled the bairns.

After she completed her ablutions, she dressed and headed down to break her fast. The hall was empty except for Celestina and Fiona, another of Maddie’s maids, with the weans.

“Good morn to you, Celestina. How is Braden this morn?”

“He and Roddy are having fun. Caralyn is up with Maddie and the men have gone off to the lists.”

“Is there a problem with Maddie?”

“Nay, Caralyn just brought Kyla and Connor up for a quick visit. The weans are missing their mama.”

“Have you seen Aedan or Neil?”

“Nay, I have not seen either one this morn.”

Jennie’s curiosity was piqued, and she wished nothing more than to see her husband. Now that they had handfasted, she had a right to see him whenever she wished, didn’t she?

“Celestina, I’m off in search of Aedan. I shall return shortly.”

Jennie moved straight through the inner bailey and headed toward the stables. She smiled when she saw Mac in the horse barn. “You just cannot stay away. I thought Alice told me you no longer worked every day.” Of course, it was no surprise that Mac preferred his horses to a life of leisure. He was not the type to sit still.

“Aye, when my wife stops tending the weans, mayhap I’ll stop tending the horses. As long as she continues, so will I.”

Jennie gave him a fierce hug. “You will never stop, Mac. You love the horses too much.”

“Aye, you have the right of it, lass.” He rubbed Midnight, and the horse nickered his thanks. “These horses are my weans. I have been with Midnight many years, and I could no’ leave him now.”

“Mac, where is Aedan’s horse? Has he gone hunting?”

“Nay, he and Neil left with several of Alex’s guards this morn, heading back to Lochluin. You didn’t know?”

Jennie’s stomach dropped to the floor. Nay, he must have misunderstood.

“Lass, you look as if you have seen a ghost. What’s bothering you?” He came over and grasped her shoulders.

Jennie shook her head in response, forcing herself to come to accept what Mac had told her. But perhaps there had been a good reason for Aedan’s abrupt departure and she was overreacting. “Where is Alex this morn?”

“The lads are all in the lists. Alex is working them hard. Word from Lochluin was not good, ‘tis why Aedan left. More skirmishes have happened than they expected.”

“My thanks, Mac.” Jennie spun on her heel and headed out to the lists, forcing herself to take deep, calming breaths. There must be a good reason for Aedan’s departure, and here was her first clue. She refused to believe her husband had taken advantage of her, that he had abandoned her after using her to fulfill his needs.

However, if she remembered the night correctly,
she
had persuaded him to the handfasting and the lovemaking, not the other way around. Lord above, what had she done? Mayhap she would be heading to Lochluin before tonight, for she could hide out in the abbey. She would be safe there. No Scots would attack the abbey.

She had almost made it out to the lists when Alex came running toward her. “What is it?” He reached her side in a matter of seconds. “Is it Maddie? What has happened? Has she lost the bairn?”

“Nay, Alex.” She placed her hand on his arm, surprised to see how agitated he was. He was losing control, and her eldest brother never lost control. “I have not seen Maddie this morn, but she fares well. Caralyn is with her.”

Alex let his breath out, clearly relieved she had not brought bad news.

“Have you seen the Cameron?”

“Aye, he left this morn. There’s more trouble in Lochluin, and he did not wish to wait. He asked me to tell you he was sorry he had to leave so early and that he’ll return when able.”

“What?” Her face fell. Until that moment, she had not truly believed it. “He left without speaking to me first or leaving a message?”

“I just gave you his message.” Alex quirked his brow at her but said nothing. “Is there something you need to tell me, Jennie?”

“Nay. I just…I thought…”

“Jennie, Aedan asked for your hand yesterday. I turned him down, explaining that you were not yet ready to wed.”

Jennie thought her head would burst. “You what? He what? You told him nay? Alex, why would you do such a thing without speaking to me first? How could you decide for me?”

Alex exploded. “You had just finished telling me in my solar that this was too much for you. With my Maddie ill, ‘tis too much for me, also. So I put an end to it. If you wish to marry the lad, we can arrange it once Maddie is better and the fate of Lochluin Abbey has been decided. There were more attacks on his land, so he has returned. ‘Tis what he needs to focus on presently, not you.”

Jennie gasped, appalled that her own brother would speak to her in such a way. If they were inside, she would consider slapping him, but she knew better than to touch him in front of an endless sea of his men. Believing it was best for her to get as far away from him as possible, she whirled around and headed back to the keep, hoping she could return to her chamber before the tears erupted and flooded down her cheeks. Alex did not try to stop her.

As soon as she made her way into the great hall, she tore up the stairs and straight into her room, flopping onto her bed and sobbing. He had left her. Aedan had handfasted with her, made sweet love to her, and left her, all in the span of less than a day.

After crying a trough of tears, her thoughts changed completely. There would be more attacks, and Aedan was heading back to fight off the raiders. What if the attacks were much worse this time? What if half the English army descended on him? Who would fix him if he was struck down again?

Suddenly, her head filled with torturous thoughts. The abbess’s words echoed in her mind. What if he needed her? She had an awful feeling in her gut, one that said she should be at his side, there at the ready if he needed her. God had sent her there before without clear guidance. Was the same thing happening to her now?

Jennie jumped off the bed and packed her satchel. She was headed to Lochluin Abbey.

***

Aedan was sick with worry. His mother was hurt and the attacks had increased. He had been patient and listened to Logan to the best of his ability as they traveled, but his mind was jumping from Jennie to his clan. Aye, he agreed the plan was sound and would work, but he felt terribly guilty for walking out on Jennie.

Alex Grant had left him no recourse.

Furious that the traitor would even thinking of harming his family, he drove his horse into a lather in no time at all. Neil finally told him he needed to rest the animal or risk killing it.

“Cameron, what’s done is done. We won’t get there any faster on one horse.”

Aedan paced in the clearing they had chosen for the night. “Logan, are you certain my mother’s wound won’t worsen?”

Gwyneth came into the clearing with two rabbits. “Cameron, your mother will be fine. We came to you because the main attack has been moved up. ‘Tis our primary concern. You need to be there when the traitor attempts to take your lands.”

He nodded. Aye, they were correct, he just missed his wife. Why wouldn’t the Grant allow him to awaken her and explain all to her?

Logan appeared to be reading his mind. “The only reason ‘tis simple. Jennie would not stay behind, and Alex would not risk her life. ‘Tis naught else for you to concern yourself. The Grant wouldn’t have allowed it, and I concur with him. Jennie is too headstrong.”

Aye, he had the right of it, and he would not have to worry about her safety. On his return, he would need to apologize, but Jennie Grant had a big heart. It was one of the reasons he loved her. Last night had been the most sacred experience of his life. Their lovemaking had been exceptional, promising years of pleasure to come. The only regret he had was the decision to handfast and keep their love hidden, for it had meant he could not hold her in his arms all night. He would much rather be in Jennie’s arms now, tasting her, savoring her, enjoying every inch of her, than riding hard toward Cameron land.

But it was not to be, not yet. A traitor needed to be caught, and he would find him. And they had come up with the perfect trap. Justice would be his in the end, he was sure of it.

Then, if he needed, he would get down on his knees in front of his wife and marry her proper. He just hoped she would forgive him.

***

Brodie stared at her. “Are you daft? You cannot travel the Highlands alone.”

When the men came in for the midday meal, she had tugged Brodie up to her chamber. Alex was already sitting by Maddie’s bedside.

“Then come with me,” she said.

“I’ll not do that. Alex would never allow it. He is in a complete turmoil, or have you not noticed how our brother is handling his wife’s illness?”