The Bridge to a Better Life (5 page)

“You never said a word to me,” she choked out, her cheeks red with shame.

“You weren’t in much of a listening mood,” Moira said softly. “You were hurting. We all were. We didn’t…know how to help you and Blake.”

But she remembered her sisters asking if she was sure she wanted to divorce Blake. They’d even suggested marital counseling, which she’d refused out of hand.

“You’re on his side,” she said with a gasp of shock.

Caroline gently took Natalie’s hands. “No, we’re on yours. Always. But if we’re being honest, we both like Blake. He loves you, and deep down, we know you still love him too.”

“Don’t tell me what I feel,” she said, her hackles rising, almost like her skin had popped out barbed wire to protect herself.

“Maybe you should listen to what he has to say,” Moira said, coming to stand beside Caroline. “He left football for you, after all.”

She shoved away from them, feeling ganged up on, and almost stepped on Touchdown in the process. “I cannot believe this! Tell me the truth. Have you been in touch with Blake since I left him, or did you just talk to him that once?”

When they both looked down rather than meeting her eyes, she wrapped her arms around herself, hoping to ward off the pain spreading through her gut.

“He was worried about you after Kim,” Caroline said. “We all were. So, yes, he would touch base every now and then to make sure you were okay.”

“You betrayed me.”

“No,” Moira said in an even voice. “We never once tried to interfere with you two.”

“But you just told me this is a blessing in disguise,” she said, acid coating the words. “Was anyone else in touch with Blake?”

Her sisters shared a glance.

“Tell me.”

“I know he talked to Mom and Dad and Matt after you left,” Caroline said. “It hurt him to learn what you’d told us about your split…that it was over him not wanting a baby.”

What was wrong with him? How could he still want her back? He had to be off kilter somehow. This…couldn’t be love. “Great. So everyone knows
I’m
in the wrong.”

“Natalie,” Moira said, taking a deep breath. “No one’s saying that. But Blake was a part of our family for a long time, and we all lost him when you left him. You never understood that.”

“Because he was my husband, and it was my right to leave.” Why couldn’t they understand that she’d had to?

“But he was my friend, and I had a right to talk to him after you dropped him,” Moira said. “He was grieving over Kim too.”

Her cheeks burned now. She knew he had been devastated over losing Kim. But she hadn’t been able to deal with her own feelings, let alone his. “Dropped him? Is that what you think I did?”

Caroline bustled in between them like a referee between two boxing opponents who’d just crossed the line.

“Yes!” Moira answered. “He’s a wonderful guy, and as far as he’s concerned, you hang the moon. Look at everything he’s done to get you back! Look at everything he’s done for you. There aren’t many guys like that. Tell me you’re happier without him, Nat, because I sure as hell haven’t seen evidence of it.”

“Enough!” Caroline shouted, causing Touchdown to whine in the corner. “That’s enough. Everyone obviously has strong feelings about this, so I suggest we take a time-out.”

Her skin felt raw and uncomfortable, as if it had been stripped bare by the ugliness of the past. Inside she was shaking, as much from seeing Blake as from hearing her sisters tell her what they really thought of the situation. “Tell Mom and the others I’m not feeling well today.”

“Natalie—”

“No, Caroline. I need some time to myself after hearing all this. Please go.”

They reached for each other’s hands as they turned to walk toward the door. That small sisterly touch made her chest hurt, and she had to fight the urge to rush over, embrace them, and tell them all was forgiven. That she was a horrible person for what she’d done. To them. To herself. But most of all, to Blake.

But she couldn’t.

If she did, they’d be right, and Blake would have succeeded in scaling her fortress again. She wasn’t about to allow that, whatever his reasons for coming back.

They said goodbye to Touchdown and gave her one last look before they left. Once again, she was alone and numb, unwilling to feel anything. Just like after Kim died.

It was no more than she deserved.

Andy Hale didn’t always have Saturdays off from rounds at Dare Valley General Hospital, so he made the most of them when he did. Usually he would go on a hike or a bike ride up the canyon with his son, but today Danny was playing with his best friend, Martin, a couple of houses down.

The house wasn’t in the best condition, but then again it never was. Between his long hours as a doctor and his role as a single dad, he didn’t have much time to clean. Hanging out with Danny would always be his priority, and if his kid wanted to play a few video games or read four stories instead of the usual two, well, then that was what they did. Dishes and laundry eventually got done. The lady he’d hired to clean the house once a week kept it from becoming a total pigsty. Sure, he asked Danny to try and clean up after himself, but the kid was only five.

And he dirtied more shirts and pants than Andy could comprehend. How had his mother managed to do the laundry for all five of them when they were kids?

His stomach growled, and he rubbed it. The Hale clan was getting together later for a BBQ at his brother’s house. He’d purposely eaten light since two local chefs would be bringing food to the potluck.

He was picking up Danny’s train set lying in front of the TV, making a cursory attempt at tidying, when the doorbell rang. He stashed the toy in the blue plastic chest in the corner of the family room and jogged over to answer it. He opened the door to find his brother standing on the threshold, looking pissed.

“What’s wrong?” he asked as Matt walked inside. “Your grill out of propane?”

“No,” he responded, tossing his car keys in his hand. “Blake is here.”

His head jerked back. “Huh? What do you mean
here?”

“He’s Natalie’s new next-door neighbor. He paid the Howards some obscene amount of money to secretly move. And he built a freaking bridge over the creek of my old place to connect their two properties. He plans to share Touchdown with her.”

Everyone had wondered where Blake had gone after shocking the world with his retirement. Then the press had reported the news of his brother’s death, and Andy had taken a moment of silence to grieve with his old friend. Blake and Adam had been as close as he and Matt were.

The whole family knew he wanted Natalie back, and had for some time, although they’d agreed not to interfere. Andy had always liked Blake and had considered him a brother until Natalie bushwhacked them all by leaving him. It seemed death’s call had given Blake a renewed fire, and part of Andy admired it.

“How’s Nat handling it?” he asked neutrally.

“How do you think? She asked me to look into the legality of the bridge. I asked her what difference it would make. I mean, if she makes a big deal of this, it will only become the talk of the town. Adam just died, for heaven’s sake. I don’t want to kick a man while he’s down, but he has to back off. Natalie is freaking out.”

“If she’s freaking out, it probably means she still cares for him.” Something he’d always suspected.

“I think we should go see him,” Matt said. “Get your shoes on. I assume Danny’s at Martin’s since he didn’t jump me the second I rang the bell. We can stop by to tell them we’ll be back in a bit.”

Andy shifted his weight. “I don’t know, Matt. What about our family pact to stay out of it? I think Natalie and Blake need to work this out on their own.”

Matt punched the air. “Look, I used to love the guy. He was part of our family, and it tore me up when he and Natalie split, but we can’t let this drag on—no matter what he’s going through. Nat made her decision, and it’s time for him to accept that. She’s already fought with Caroline and Moira about it.”

That didn’t sound good. “What happened?”

“Well, they broke the pact. They said she should give Blake another chance. They might also have mentioned that they’ve always liked him, and they admire him for giving up football for her.”

Well, it was something worth considering, wasn't it? Blake lived and breathed football like Andy lived and breathed medicine. But his former brother-in-law had always carved time for Natalie and his family—his own and theirs—into his hectic football schedule. Andy was the same way, so he and Blake had shared a certain understanding because of that similarity.

“All right, I’ll go with you, but I don’t like it.” He tugged on his shoes. “I also want you to promise me two things.”

Matt leveled him a glance. “And what would that be, Andy Cakes?”

Jeez, how he hated that nickname. “That you won’t be mean to him. He just lost his brother.”

“Give me some credit.”

“They don’t call you Matty Ice for nothing.”

“I’ll ignore that. What’s the second thing?”

“We hear his side of things.”

His eyes narrowed like he was about to play hardball. “I’ve already heard his side of things, and I’m not saying he’s wrong, but it doesn’t matter. Natalie is our sister.”

Being a lawyer, Matt saw the world more black and white than he did. Andy opened the door, grateful he didn’t need a jacket. Summer was finally approaching, thank God. Late snowfall a couple of weeks ago had made him want to pound his head into the ground.
Die, winter, die,
he’d chanted as he shoveled the drive for the umpteenth time.

“Well,
I
haven’t heard his side of things,” he told Matt as they walked over to Martin’s house.

“That’s because you were dealing with your own stuff then, and Blake knew not to bother you.”

He halted in front of Martin’s front door. “That’s because he’s a good guy.”

Matt shook his head stubbornly as he rang the doorbell. “Doesn’t matter. Natalie wants him gone, so he’s gone.”

After seeing how closed off his sister had become since Kim’s death, Andy wasn’t so sure he agreed.

When Blake opened the door to see his two former brothers-in-law, he had to fight the urge to pull them into a hug. He hadn’t seen them in almost two years. He and the Hale brothers had been close, and losing Natalie had also meant losing her family.

“Here to break my legs?” he asked instead. After all, Matt probably wouldn’t respond too well to a hug right now. He looked like a pissed off defensive linebacker eager to flatten him to the ground.

“No,” Andy replied as Matt opened his mouth—probably to say something very different. “We’re just here to talk. Blake, I’m so sorry about Adam. More than I can say.”

“Yes, you have our deepest condolences,” Matt said, dialing back the PO factor.

There was a flare of grief in his chest. “Thanks. I appreciate that. He had a tough year before he passed. In the end, I think he was ready.” The day before he’d died, his brother had confessed how much pain he was in and how tired he was of fighting. Blake had told him it was okay to go, and Adam had given him one last smile before slipping into unconsciousness.

When he held out his hand for a shake, Andy bypassed it and pulled him into a hug. “It’s really good to see you, man.”

He clapped him on the back before releasing him and had to wipe away some tears when he pulled away. He held out his hand to Matt, waiting to see if he would shake it. “I don’t expect a hug.”

Matt snorted, but he shook his hand willingly enough. “Funny. I’m not much of a hugger.”

It was a start.

He’d made this move to Dare Valley knowing he would have to win over Natalie’s family as much as he would Natalie. The Hales were a unit, and he knew he had allies among them. The question was, would that influence Natalie? She had a head like a rock when it came to listening to anyone.

“Come on in,” he said, heading to the kitchen. “I know it’s early, but would you like a beer?”

“I’m fine,” Matt replied, now sounding every inch of his nickname, Matty Ice.

“Sounds great,” Andy added, and Blake didn’t miss the elbow he landed in his brother’s ribs. “This is a big change from your place in Denver.”

Blake opened a beer for himself, then slid an IPA and a bottle opener to Andy across the navy granite island in the center of the kitchen.

“Sure you don’t want one?” he asked Matt, who shook his head.

“Let’s head outside. Nice to have warm weather finally. Winter was a bitch this year.”

“Blake,” Matt said in a cool tone, “this isn’t a social visit. Natalie informed me this morning that you up and bought my neighbor’s house and built a bridge connecting your properties.”

Rather than answer right away, he led them out to the back patio. Sure, the deck was smaller than the one he had in Denver—heck the whole house was smaller by two thousand square feet—but it had a killer view of the mountains. Settling back into a deck chair, he kicked his feet out in front of him. This conversation was going to take a while—or so he hoped—and he wanted to get comfortable.