The Book of Pirates and Highwaymen (13 page)

Confessions Of A Highwayman

Henry Simms was tried and executed for a highway robbery in 1745, after conviction he gave the following account of his exploits:

‘I will begin,’ says he, ‘with my nativity. I was born in the parish of St Martin in the Fields, in the county of Middlesex, and should be thirty-one years of age, were I to live until next October; my parents who were honest people, died when I was an infant, and after their deaths, I was taken into the care of my grandmother, who lived in St James’s parish, Westminster, who was the wife of a commissioned officer in his late majesty’s land forces, and is still living, and receives a widow’s pension from the crown.

This good old woman, when I was but six years of age, put me to school to one of her own religion, she being a Dissenter; but not approving of his way of teaching, she took me from him, and sent me to an academy in Charles-street, St James’s, where I learnt arithmetic throughout, and some French and Latin; but frequently playing truant, I often ran into vice, before I was nine years of age, and frequently laid out nights, with other boys as wicked as myself; for which ill practices my grandmother used to correct me severely.

The first fact I ever committed was before I was ten years old. My Grandmother went to pay a visit to a Dissenting minister, at one Mr Palmer’s, a soap-boiler, in Crown-court, St Anne’s, and while she was in company with him, I got to the shop till, and took out about twenty shillings in silver, but was detected, and got a severe beating.

I frequently used to pick my grandmother’s pocket of two or three shillings, which she seldom missed; or if she did suspect me, or challenge me with it, I had always something to say to prove me innocent. By my laying out of nights I soon got into bad company; and they led me to the worst of houses, particularly the Two-Penny Runs in St Giles’s parish. This company persuaded me to rob my grandmother; and one morning, I opened a large chest in her house, and took away about £17 in gold and silver, and my best clothes, all which I carried to my new companions, and distributed the money very liberally amongst them, for which they greatly caressed me, made me drunk, and carried me to their house (as they called it) in Church-lane, St Giles’s, where they put me to bed, and as soon as I was asleep, they stript me stark naked, leaving me alone; and when I awaked in the morning, I found they had left me nothing but rags to cover my nakedness.

What could I do, I could not tell, for it was impossible for me to go home to my grandmother’s; at last I proposed to go to the Two-Penny Run in Vine-street, to enquire after my companions, but could hear nothing of them. The landlord took compassion on me, and gave me some victuals, and went to my grandmother’s, to let her know where I was. The old gentlewoman came crying, ready to break her heart, and after being a little composed, she asked me what I had done with her money, and how I had disposed of my clothes? I told her several impudent lies, and seemed sorrowful for my fault, though I slily laughed in my sleeve to think I had bit the old woman. The landlord was more ingenuous than I was, and told her who had brought me thither. The names of my hopeful companions were Wry-neck Jack, George Monk, Nunkey Watson, and several more, all pilfering thieves, and petty pickpockets.

None of these gentry could be found; so the old gentlewoman took me with her, and caused me to be chained to the kitchen grate, with an iron chain and a padlock she had brought for that purpose; in which confinement I was continued for three months all day long, but was indulged with a bed in the night time, and a strict watch kept on me.

On my promise of amendment I got released, and more new clothes were bought me, which, when I got, I went to my old haunts, and this being the time of Tottenham-court fair, I went thither, and saw my companions tossing up for money. They soon recollected me, and were glad to see me, so I went with them to a music booth, where they made me almost drunk with gin, and began to talk their flash language, which I did not then understand.

Night coming on, and I wanting to go to sleep, they took me to a brick-kiln in Tottenham Court Road, and the kiln being burning, they broiled some meat, and made me eat part of it.

We had not been there long, before several women came to us, who were all very ragged; they brought with them a keg of gin, which they had stolen, and began to sing their flash songs, and I was as merry as the best of them.

The women were very fond of me, and being drunk, I began to swear, which pleased them wonderfully. One of them took a silk handkerchief out of her pocket, and taking off my stock, in which was a silver buckle, she put her handkerchief about my neck, and then unbuckled my shoes, and unbuttoned the knees of my breeches, and tied my garters below knee, telling me that was the way the Bowman boys wore them.

As soon as my companions found me asleep, they stript me of all my clothes, and everything else, except my shirt, and on their taking leave, threw some water over me, for when I awaked I found myself very wet, and almost perished with cold. I began to cry and lament sadly, when two or three women came up, and offered me their service to go and find out the people who had robbed me; and carried me to a place where they sift cinders, and got two old shoes, which I put on, and was going with them towards Tottenham-court Fair; but in the long field I saw my grandmother’s man come running after me, upon some intelligence the old woman received where I was. On his seizing me the women ran away.

Being now at home with my grandmother, I behaved pretty well for some time; and she proposed to put me apprentice to a breeches-maker, one of her religion, and a very honest man. To him I was bound, but being lazy, wicked, and unruly, he beat me heartily, so I ran away from him in less than three weeks.

I went home to my grandmother, and taking an opportunity of her being abroad, I took all my best clothes, went to Rag-fair, and sold them, and spent the money among my old companions.

My grandmother finding I was not to be reclaimed, removed from her own house to lady St-nh-pe’s, where she continued while her ladyship was in the country; and thither I went one night, and because I could not directly get admittance one night I broke a great many windows, and the old woman was at last obliged to let me in. There lived a silversmith next door, and one day, whilst the workmen were gone to dinner, I got over the wall, and stole a silver candlestick, and a stand for a tea-kettle, which I carried off, with all the lady’s housekeeper’s linen; and went directly to Mary-le-bone Park, to a barn, which my companions and I harboured in, where I found Jack Sutton, Jack Skinner, and two or three women, and to them I produced my booty; at the sight of which they seemed greatly rejoiced, and told me they were sure I should turn out a very promising young fellow. We sold the things in Peter-street, Soho, and had £9 for the plate and linen.

The plate being missed, my grandmother and several neighbours were after me, and I was seized in Paradise Row, Tyburn-road, and brought home, and threatened with justice; I confessed where the plate and the linen was sold, but the woman was gone, and could not be heard of, so they were never recovered. This affair was made up by means of lady St-nh-pe; but my grandmother for ever after excluded me that house; so I went to my old companions at Mary-le-bone, and concluded that night to rob any one we met; which we did, and picked up some small sums.

About a fortnight after I was taken up on suspicion of being concerned with them in divers robberies; and was committed to Newgate; but there being no proof against me, I was cleared at the sessions: my grandmother was so kind as to get me out of gaol and take me home, where I continued not long before I broke out again, and got acquainted with one Henry Chamberlain; who used to write incendiary letters; and he persuaded me to write a threatening letter to Mr Dawson in the Mint in the Tower, which I did, and demanded five guineas.

For this piece of villany, I was apprehended, and sent to the Tower gaol; but disguising my hand, and saying a man gave me a shilling to carry the letter, after three days confinement, and several examinations before the governor of the Tower, I was discharged.

My next acquaintance was with two brothers, named Toon, and one James Mahony, and we committed several robberies together: they were taken up and transported, but I had the good luck to escape; though their fate gave me some uneasiness; and I thought of relinquishing all vice, and told my grandmother my intention; and she promised if I would keep my word, she would love me more tenderly than ever; and on my faithful promise to do so, she took me home again; and I tarried with about four months; and did nothing but divert myself at duck-hunting and bear-baiting, where I got acquainted with thieves from all quarters of the town, who soon perverted me from my good resolutions.

Being one day washing in Mary-le-bone Basin, I perceived an elderly gentleman walking through the park, and up a bye-place, called the Bear-gardens, and following him, met with Jack Robinson, and Joe S-------------e, and we agreed to rob him, and accordingly knocked him down, and took his silver watch, a gold ring, and about forty shillings in silver, tied him, and flung him into a ditch, left him, then made off, and divided the booty between us.

Abundance of my acquaintance being either transported or hanged, I began to think of another course of life, and being recommended to the late Mr Blunt, he hired me as a postillion. This business made me acquainted with almost all the roads in England; so that no one was ever better qualified for a highwayman than myself; and having a good share of impudence, I thought the highway would make me a gentleman at once; however, I deferred this dangerous undertaking for some time. After Mr Blunt’s death, I served Mr Tatloe, who succeeded him; I was hired as a postillion to a noble duke, where I remained but a short time.

I now got again into very bad company about Covent-garden, and turned a great gamester, and was every night at my lord’s, unless when I had no money, and then turned out to seek my fortune on the streets.

At the gaming table, I had good luck, and always appearing genteel, the gamblers gave me the name of Young Gentleman Harry. There was one Henry Moythen, whom they called Old Gentleman Harry, used the same table, and as he taught me to cheat at play, they insisted I should answer to his name. My father (as he was called) not long after our acquaintance, met with a very unlucky accident at a public house in Russell-street, Covent-garden, where having some words about a law suit with one Dick Hodges, a distiller, Hodges was so unkind as to run a knife into his guts, so that he was sent out of the world without having so much as having time to say his prayers.

I was very sorry to hear the news of my father’s fatal catastrophe, but it was no more than I expected, for our acquaintance used to tell us, that neither of us would die in our beds; and now, to my sorrow, I find their words too true.

Amongst my many female acquaintances, on whom I spent my money and time, Will M-rg-----m’s wife was my greatest favourite, though I got myself into some trouble on her account; for Will indicted me at the Old Bailey for a robbery; but the court finding there was a barrel better herring between the prosecutor and prisoner, I was acquitted and discharged from Newgate. To do justice to the woman, I shall take the whole blame on myself; I persuaded her to take the things, and they were as much her property as her pretended husband’s.

Before this, I and Tom Casey had committed several robberies in the county of Kent, in 1743. The first robbery we did, was attacking a gentleman on Shooter’s Hill, and robbing him of £ 17. About a week afterwards, I myself attacked a lady in her chariot upon Black heath, and took from her a purse with gold and silver in it, and two diamond rings. I was pursued by some butchers as far as Lewisham Water, who there dismounted me, tore off the cape of my coat, and were going to knock me down; but I recovering myself, presented my two pistols at them, on which they drew back, so that I made the best of my way along the road that leads to Newcross turnpike, leaving my horse, which was an exceedingly good gelding, behind me. I secreted myself in a corn field till after midnight, and then came to town. The purse and money I hid in a tree, and in a day or two fetched my store, and regaled plentifully till all was gone.

About this time the gaming table having very much reduced me, I got a horse, and went into the country, and at Towcester, in Northamptonshire, I put up at the White Horse. I spied an ancient gentleman in the kitchen, who had hired a chaise and two horses to bring him to London: a Welchman being to ride one of those horses, I thought this was a good chance, and asked the ostler who the man was. He said he had a commission in the army, but was a poor mean-spirited old rogue, for he had not given him a single farthing. Thought I, then there will be the more for me, for I was fully determined to turn him, and made myself ready to follow him as soon as he set forward from the inn. I was exceedingly well dressed, having on a green velvet coat, a gold laced hat and waistcoat, and every thing answerable; so that I could not be suspected for a highwayman. I observed that the old cuff had a brace of pistols in the chaise, and therefore determined to throw myself upon him, as soon as I could find an opportunity, and one soon presented itself; for the Welchman dismounting to fasten part of the harness which had given way, I rode up in a great hurry, and the old man called me, and said, ‘Young man, if you ride so fast, you will soon ride your estate away.’ I told him, ‘I hoped not, for it was pretty extensive, and lay in several counties;’ and immediately jumped from my horse and chaise, secured the pistols, and told the gentleman if he spoke one word, I would shoot him. I searched his pockets, and found seven shillings which I did not take; and in the seat of the chaise I found a pair of scarlet bags, which I mounted on my horse, and rode away furiously into the county of Bedfordshire.

At a proper place I examined the bags, and found some thread, stockings, three clean Holland shirts, two white waistcoats, and 102 guineas in gold. I was quite overjoyed, and after securing the money, threw the bags and the linen into a field, thinking they might be of some use to a poor countryman, who might have more need of them than me.