The Book of Night Women (37 page)

—Who did know that white man would lock horn over black cho-cho?

—What you chattin’ ’bout now?

—No you, Miss Precious. The two man lock horn like man bull a-threaten boy bull. Massa Humphrey and Massa Quinn, Lilith. Seem Massa Humphrey did want to move you back in the house to wait ’pon Miss Isobel. Humph! Robert Quinn did get very Irish is all me goin’ say.

—How you mean?

—Me don’t chat ’bout people affair, but me will say this. Any time a white man start fight for a nigger girl, it mean he liking her too much and that bad for both him, but worse for you.

—Robert Quinn only glad that him belly full and him bed warm.

—Mayhaps is so, but me never see a man so hopping mad as Robert Quinn. He storm right into where Massa Humphrey sleeping.
Tell that Creole bitch to stay out of me damn house
, he say, right there to Massa Humphrey face. Massa so frighten he didn’t even defend Miss Isobel honour. He just say,
Of course, Robby, of course
. That was that. Robert Quinn storm out just like he storm in.

—That be him own business, Lilith say.

—Yours too, Homer say.

—Me no care what white people want to fight for, Lilith say.

—Really, now? Well, make sure you heart take kinder to what negro people want to fight for, Homer say. Lilith say nothing. She don’t want to be near Homer.

Lilith don’t say nothing to Robert Quinn and Robert Quinn don’t say nothing to Lilith. Evening come and pass with him still in the field. Night come and pass with nothing but her ghost as company. Lilith wondering why the thin black woman keep coming to her. Maybe she not asking to kill but warning that a killing bound to happen. Maybe the woman be on her side and guarding her like the home spirit that come from the Africa or what the church call angel. Same thing, she think, one just get burn by more sun. Maybe the woman was angel warning her to not sin with wickedness. Or maybe a devil.

Or maybe the woman be the spirit of the head god and the fire of revenge, and maybe is she and not Lilith doing the killing and she, not Lilith, who deserve the blame. Lilith wondering if her burden would be better if some god was in it. Even Homer believe in something, though Lilith don’t know what that be. The only thing she can remember believing was the page from the picture book and the sleeping girl, who different from her in every way but eye.

But now Lilith perplex again. If the girl was sleeping, how she to know the colour eye? The picture coming back in her head but not clear. Is long time that Lilith have to think about what the page really be, what at the edge of paper, what word did on the page that she could read now, but not back then. She think ’bout the white man who dress in a black jacket and who, now that she think, don’t look nothing like Massa Humphrey. She wonder why she used to think so, that maybe there be something in man that make them alike other man, and that thing not be how them look. Maybe is how them stand, maybe is how them walk, or what them say. Robert Quinn still out there beating and killing niggers, Homer did say.

Two day later, right before dawn, three man on horseback ride wicked into Montpelier. A rap come from the door like somebody set to knock it down and Quinn jump, grabbing him musket under the bed. Lilith frighten but Quinn ask who is it and go to the door. Then he come back in and pull on him breeches, grab him boots and leave. Before sunrise Lilith dash out to the great house to hear Homer telling Pallas that Massa Humphrey ride gone with the mens too. Ride gone to Kingston. In the wee hours somebody set fire to Kingston Harbour. Half of the walk burn down and crash into the sea. No ship can dock or set out to sea from Kingston. They have reason to believe that it be the work of negroes. Homer hum a song. She didn’t look happy, but she didn’t look sad neither.

25

EVERY NEGRO WALK IN A CIRCLE. TAKE THAT AND MAKE OF IT what you will. But sometime the circle not be the negro’s but the white man own, and white man circle full of hill and valley and things they say that mean something else. Black man wake up to find circle make for him, beginning with the shackle that lock round him neck. White man circle come by him own choosing. Plenty have choice to walk straight and away, yet plenty come back to where them start. Others never leave. And if you the negro get take up in the white man life, you travel that circle too.

After the Kingston Harbour fire, word spread to the backra that he must be unceasing in him vigilance. Seventeen niggers get round up by the infantry. Most of them get whip, hammer, derby-dose, beat, bludgeon, burn, whip, gibbet or arse fuck with a red-hot poker. The rest get shot, so no slave alive to stand trial. That don’t stop Miss Isobel night riding. Lilith stop going outside to watch her, but Robert Quinn go outside and come back laughing so hard that he throw himself into a hiccup. He go to sleep for a little, but then wake up early to go back out to the cane field. Lilith didn’t sleep. In the evening Robert Quinn come home just in time because Lilith mind was haunting her again.

—God feckin’ damn! he say and throw down two stalk of cane that he take to peeling and chewing.—God feckin’ damn! The man’s lost all claim to good sense. Kingston damn near burns down, something is afoot and all he thinks about is marrying the bitch!

—Massa?

—There’s no place for the militia to be dispatched, no place for merchant ships to dock and take his precious sugar, mind ye, and all he speaks of is finding a feckin’ ring!

—Find ring for what, massa?

—Lilith, do ye think there could ever come a day when ye call me Robert?

—N-no, massa.

Robert Quinn sigh.—This must be a warning, to myself, he say. I should guard my heart after all, he say.

—Massa?

—Huh? Oh, I was...

—Who getting married, sah?

—Yer master, that’s who to goddamn. She’s finally bewitched him. Deceived is more to the matter, totally and horribly deceived. I tell ye this, he cannot, simply cannot, marry that woman.

—Why, m—

—If ye call me by that word one more time.

—Why, M . . . Ro . . . Lilith don’t know what to say.

—Because . . . I regret, I cannot tell you this. Good lord, should I tell him? I haven’t really considered this.

Robert Quinn sit down on the table and pull him legs up. He wrap him arms round him knees. He look at the ceiling, he look at him knees and he look at Lilith.

—Goddamn, what do I do? I ask ye, what am I to do?

Lilith shrug.

—A devil of a thing, keeping a secret, isn’t it? Devil of a thing. ’Tis like God or some blimey bastard just picked ye to be the innkeeper of all this . . . this . . . truth, so that everybody else can go about lying. Devil of a thing, man. The very devil.

—If you say so, massa.

Robert Quinn sigh again.—I wager a negro, especially a house slave, would be bowed down by a life’s worth of secrets.

—Me don’t have no secret, sah.

—Of course, and me mum named me St. Patrick so that I’d marry Catholic.

Lilith bow down her head.

—Seems to be our lot in life, I fear, he say and smile half-like.

Lilith stare at the ground for a long time. The she unbutton her dress and make it fall to the floor. She half smile but not for long. Robert Quinn look at her with him left eyebrow raise.

—Not the intercourse I was hankering for, he say and get up and go to the bedroom and shut the door. Lilith still in the kitchen, feeling a nasty breeze on her back. She pull up her dress and go to Quinn room. He on the bed shucking off him boot. Lilith open her mouth to ask a question but don’t. He see her.

—That question ye just thought better of asking, what was it?

—Nothing, massa . . . Quinn.

—Yawning you were, then, were ye?

—Yes, m—

—Come in, Lilith, and shut the door.

Lilith close the door and watch him pulling off the right boot. She grab the left one. Him toes wriggle but him foot stinking something awful.

—You foots need washing, massa.

—Do you want to wash them, luv?

—They need cleaning or they goin’ stink up the bed.

—That’s not what I asked of ye.

—Massa?

—D’ye want to? Do you have any desire to lay yer hands on me stinky feet? Do you want to or are yer afraid of me and feel ye have to?

—I . . .

Quinn pull her down on the bed beside him. He looking straight at her.

—Tell me the very thing you were about to say before you quit, he say.

—Massa.

—Lilith. I demand to know.

Lilith quiet. She rubbing left hand with the right.

—No, I do not. Lilith, I don’t demand it. If it’s yer wish to tell me, please do; if ye don’t, that’s fine as well. I would like to know, though, if ye please.

—Massa. Massa . . . I . . . You, you have to . . . I don’t . . . When you . . . we can’t forget. We can’t forget.

—Forget what?

—Who be the massa and who be the nigger. Lilith wrap her arm around herself and bow her head. Quinn quiet for a while.

—Aye. Aye. I ask ye, though, who sees us in this room, other than God?

—Nobody, sah.

—Nobody. That’s correct. That’s correct. I’ll strike a bargain with ye, an arrangement, if you will.

—Massa?

Quinn touch her knee.

—This room, these walls, d’ye see ’em, luv?

Lilith say yes.

—Once we’re in this room, inside this room, what if you could say to me whatever comes to ye? Call me whatever you wish. Call me Robert and I’ll call you Lilith. Can you do that, Lilith?

Outside the wind was threatening to answer.—No, massa, she say.

—I’ll beg ye if I have to, he say.

—Backra not supposed to beg nigger nothing, sah.

—And yet here I am, watching you make a beggar out of me. All right. Since you must be this way, I order it, then.

—You commanding slave to be free?

—Yes, I command it. You must call me by the name me mother gave me when we’re in this room. I’m just a man and yer just a girl. And you must say anything you wish or nothing at all if you please. As long as we’re in this room and the door is closed. D’ye understand me, luv?

—Yes, massa.

—No ye don’t. Not at all. The door’s closed, Lilith. And I’m Robert. Robert, Robert, Robert.

Lilith know she can hate a massa, a Massa Quinn or even a Massa Robert. But she can’t hate a Robert, or a Humphrey or a Isobel, for that matter. Him spinning her and she like and dislike what him do. Why a white man want to be nice to a nigger, only to be more wicked later? Why white man love give thing, only to take it back later? She get up quick to leave but he catch her hand and pull her back.

—Look around you, luv. Nothing here but the walls and the dark.

—And what outside?

—I don’t give two shakes of a rat’s arse what’s outside. I’m in here with you, luv, and yer not leaving until you call me Robert.

—Robert.

—Not like I’m yer horse, damn you.

—With all the riding that go on—

—That go . . . what? Dear heart, could ye just finish one goddamn sentence? D’ye think I’ll whip you if you speak yer mind? D’ye think I’m a liar, Lilith?

—No, ma . . . No, Robert.

—Good. That’s good to know, at the very least.

—Robert.

—That’s my name. Pleased to make yer acquaintance, Lilith.

 

 

But she know.
She know as soon as he start playing with her name, taking Lilith and Lovey and getting Lily and then going back to Lovey. From he start touching her face and lying down on him back in full clothes and pulling her on top of him. From he hold her and start laugh and never go to take off her clothes even though she feeling him grow. From he start talk like he just come back from wherever the Faerie Queene was hiding them long weeks. She know that her mouth could still say what her heart can’t swear. She know that the loose tongue, more enemy than friend, be all that save her. The same heart that should want to give all to Robert Quinn say no, or mayhaps it can never say yes. So she cry. She cry long and loud and Quinn weep too because mayhaps he think this be the bawling that woman do to cleanse themselves. The bawling that mean she free herself from whatever did bound her and just like a woman she need tears to wash it all away. But Lilith cry because her heart couldn’t cleanse, because she couldn’t wash away nothing and what he want she could never give him. She don’t know why. Mayhaps that be what Massa Humphrey teach her by making them mens nearly kill her. She wanted to give everything to him, she could say that to herself now. But she can’t do this again for he white and he be the overseer and he control the whip and he white and he Irish and he soon tired of her and he white and he be the overseer and some things don’t mean to be and he white. And a nigger girl must be sensible ’bout white man behaviour, for it set like the sun and sunset always different on any given day. She could give herself like she do before and this time never get herself back. No. No. No. She bawling and Quinn think it be tears of joy. And that is what they be, in they way. For a man can make a woman know her true self and what she be is nothing that belong to Quinn. She know that now. So she cry.

The next morning, Lilith get summon to Miss Isobel room.

—Oh, Lilith, if only all women could share in my joy! If only, she say. Then she pause herself for a minute and burst out a laugh that sound dirty like a whore.

—Share indeed. Pox ’pon de stinking, backstabbing, petticoat-shedding lot.

Miss Isobel drive the carriage to Kingston with Lilith beside her. Lilith so frighten that she can’t remember when last she so frighten. Massa Humphrey did say it not too safe for two womens to be riding all the way to Kingston with no man for protection, for that would be going all the way down to the harbour and all sort of drunkards and worse were down there—wicked men, licentious women, perverted sailors who have not seen a woman in months. Indeed, it was the most disgusting city in the empire. Miss Isobel say that she going to Kingston, not Port Royal, and have no fear, no pirates have been seen for ages. Miss Isobel insist, saying she can use a musket and a cutlass better than most man and to get her they would have to catch her first. Massa Humphrey look like he about to take a stand but Miss Isobel would have none of it. He look at Lilith like he sorry for what she about to get into. Robert Quinn tell Lilith to stay away from Greenwich on the harbour, since it be in ruins and populated by the most desperate sort, as if she be the one doing the riding. As she and Miss Isobel ride off, Lilith see Robert Quinn touch Massa Humphrey on the shoulder and whisper. Robert Quinn look at Lilith for a second but then he disappear. Miss Isobel swing the carriage round a corner and them gone.