THE BONDAGE OF LOVE (11 page)

"Well, she told him they should alter the second part of the Hail Mary."

"Why just the second part?"

"Why, be god Why just the second part? But you know what it says there?"

"Yes, " Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for"--' Len Gallagher interrupted him by lifting his hand.

"That's it, the Mother of God bit. You didn't see how that could come about, did you, lass?"

"No, Da; I didn't; and I still don't."

"Well," - Len was nodding towards Katie now 'she told him that she could understand Mary being the Mother of Jesus and that's how it should be said: Holy Mary, Mother of Jesus, and so on, because Mary being a human being, she could have carried Jesus for nine months, but never anybody like God, who we are told is everywhere, bigger than this world, in the heavens, on the sea, on the planets, in the stars, everywhere. So how could an ordinary woman carry Him? There was no reason in it, you said to him, didn't you now? You said that was just a prayer made up by old fogies, men in monasteries and dried-up women in convents. " He was nodding round the table again.

"Every word of it is true, what she said to him. And you know something?"

He was nodding again.

"He's a ruddy-faced man, you know, fresh complexioned, but he went out of that door as pale as a piece of white lint. Oh," - he sat back chuckling 'we have our amusing moments in this house, especially when somebody decides to speak the truth.

"Tisn't often, mind,

but, nevertheless, it's something to look forward to when the past lies heavy on your mind. You know," - he was addressing Willie and Sammy now " I was thinking earlier on, if I was a man again and young, I'd make it me business to work at preparing for a bright past, something I could look back on when I was old and enjoy. But you never have the sense of the old when you're young. If God made us, as we're told, he didn't give us the

wherewithal, each one of us separately, to cope with the life He threw us into. It's difficult, you know, for many of us to build up a bright past when we're having a hell of a job tackling the present. D'you follow what I mean? "

Both Sammy and Willie inclined their heads, but it was Sammy who spoke, saying, "I follow you, Mr. Gallagher, and I'm with you in all you say. But sometimes from an unknown quarter you do get a helping hand. You won't

believe it, Mr. Gallagher, but I'm where I am today through using bad

language."

"You don't say?"

"I do, Mr. Gallagher, and I'll tell you about it some time. I was very cognisant' - he bowed his head 'as my schoolmaster would say, with the 'b's, oh, all the 'b's; the if's I didn't have much practice at because me lugs were nearly knocked off by me da."

Now he had Mr. Gallagher laughing.

The da nearly knocked bloody hell out of me. He belted me and boxed me ears, until sometimes I had to hold me head on with both hands, and all to stop me cussing. And all the while he would use the book on me extending my

knowledge, far beyond that for which he was knocking me down. Then one day I went to his house," he indicated Willie, 'and trampled all the daffodils down in his mother's garden, while I yelled at him as many four-letter words as I knew. But imagine how his lady-mother reacted when she heard her son give me back as much as I sent. That was a day never to be forgotten. Then his dad came on the scene, lifted me by the collar and shook me like a rat, then took me into their house and gave me tea. And that was the beginning. There was a lot after that.

Oh, a great deal. If I can come back sometime, Mr. Gallagher, I'll tell you all about it. And, Katie, there, she'll tell you of the rows we had. Oh my!

She hated my guts. To her I was a common, little, snotty-nosed snipe. I think I still am. " He turned and smiled at Katie, but she didn't smile back at him. Her face was straight but was sending out a warning. And as he

pushed his chair back, saying, " Well, we'd better be making our way. " Len Gallagher bent towards Katie, asking her quietly, " You all right, lass?

You've been quiet of late;

you were all mouth when you came in. "

Katie stood up and she gulped in her throat for a moment before she said,

"Yes. Yes, I'm all right, thank you, Mr. Gallagher. And ... and I've enjoyed meeting you and your family. If I may, I ... I'll come again."

Glancing at his sister, Willie thought, good gracious! She's not going to, is she? And then he

joined Sammy's voice in saying his thanks and goodbyes to Mrs. Gallagher, not forgetting to mention the tea she had provided.

Len Gallagher had risen to his feet and Katie saw that she had to look up at him. She hadn't realised he was so tall. But he was gaunt, all of him was gaunt, and his shoulders were stooped. And again she thought. Surely this couldn't be the man who had so often frightened his family to the extent that they had to flee into a neighbour's house. And a further thought struck her.

Yes, he was the same man, for only a short time ago he had been for

murdering his daughter who had come home pregnant, and for the second time.

Nobody had mentioned her. She wondered where she had gone. This knowledge had been imparted by Daisy on their first meeting outside the Centre. The child must have been born by now. But where was it and the girl? There was so much tragedy in this house, what you would call simple everyday tragedy.

Of those at home, only Daisy and one of the younger men were in work. She felt she couldn't stand any more, she would have to get out. But she

remained looking up at the man, until she held her hand out to him; and he not only shook it, but he covered it with his other big honey palm. Then she was nodding goodbye to the rest of the family. But at the door, where Mrs.

Gallagher was standing, she muttered, "It's ... it's been most kind of you."

"Not at all, lass, not at all." Then bending forward, the little woman said,

"Well, it's still amazing to me, it brings a bright spot into me life to know that Daisy has such friends as you and the two ... young gentlemen.

Jimmy had told us about you and your grand place, but I never believed we'd meet you. It's been a pleasure, lass, it's been a pleasure."

"And for us, Mrs. Gallagher." Katie's voice was very small.

The young man Sep was at the door now, saying, "Will I come with you, our Daisy?"

"No, Sep; I'm only setting them to the bus. And if I keep well under the lamps nobody will ever pick me up, will they?" At this derisive remark about herself, Willie was for answering, "I would." But it wasn't the time for being funny. There was something wrong with their Katie. Nobody had said anything to upset her. He couldn't understand it. She had been full of

chatter earlier on; he had never heard her go on as she had.

They had reached the end of the street, and were now about to pass over a piece of open land bordered along one side by a stark brick wall that had yet to be demolished. And when Katie suddenly stopped and turned her face to it, her head crooked in the corner of her arm, Willie exclaimed, "What is it?

What's up with you? What's the matter?"

"Leave her! Leave her!" Sammy pulled Willie to one side as he was about to turn Katie from the wall, and again he said, "Leave her for a minute." But he did not check Daisy when she went and stood by Katie who was now sobbing audibly;

and she put her arm around her shoulder when she in

said, "There! Have it out. Your place will likely have the same effect on me and the people in it an' all when I come to your party."

Willie now peered helplessly at Sammy through the dim light from the lamp at the end of the wall, and he whispered to Sammy, "D'you know what's happened?

I mean, what's up with her? Everybody was so decent, I mean ..."

"I know what you mean, Willie. Yes, and every body was so nice, decent. But she saw something that I know all about and you've never experienced. She saw poverty. And what was more disturbing, she saw a failed human being, a wasted life. That's why Daisy didn't want us to go. She knows it all, she feels it all."

He stopped muttering when he heard Daisy say, "Come on. Come on, lass.

It's all over now. You know what it's all about and you'll understand in the future. Perhaps you'll understand me a little better. Come on, dry your face. I should think, if you go into your house looking like you do now, your bawling dad will be down here to know who's upset you. " She was talking lightly now, and when Katie muttered, " I'm sorry, I'm sorry, because I. I did enjoy being there, meeting . meeting them all. But there was just something. "

"Yes, there was just something," said Daisy slowly now as she linked her arm in Katie's and drew her over the bare ground, the boys following.

"And Da knew there was something, because he took to you from the beginning.

I could see that. He's not the fool people take him for, you know, the

drunken, one-time great steelworker, as he still puts himself over to be.

And, you know, I bet you wouldn't believe it, he makes up rhymes, sad kind of rhymes, like the one he sang all about failure.

Some of them are deep, with double meaning. But there's one thing about it, he's got Ma. He's always had her and he always will. There's that something between them that will keep them together. He's a coarse man, yes, but he's not ignorant. And yet, when I think back, it was his ignorance that stopped John from going to the High School, because even in those days, he could have applied for help, but he wouldn't. But then, perhaps it was the best for John. He went to Australia, you know, and in his going he was supposed to help the family by sending money home. But Ma only had a letter twice with money in it, very small amounts, and that's some years ago now. He picked up with a girl and married her. Me da never mentions him, nor our Lucy. Oh, Lucy could be dead and buried, like the child. This one, too, died, like the other one. Last time we heard anything of her she was down in Brighton. She was working in a convent. They'll have her in afore they finish and she'll be tied to the kitchen for life, like some of the nuns I've seen. But likely that would be the best thing for her. As long," - she started to giggle now

'as long as there were no young priests about, because she can't see a pair of trousers but her mouth waters."

There was a combined giggle from behind, and at this she turned and said,

"You two must have cud dies lugs!" . At the bus stop they said goodbye to her with, "We'll see you on Tuesday night," and one last plea from Katie,

"You'll come next Saturday then?"

"What d'you think?"

Daisy had pushed her up on the step, then stood and watched the bus move away, before turning for home again, thinking, Well, that was a turn up for the books. I never thought I would cotton on to Katie Bailey. But she had got through to me da, hadn't she? It was funny that.

When they reached home, Katie puzzled Fiona with her reticence regarding the uninvited visit they had made to Daisy's house. All she would say was she felt tired and had a bit of a headache, and she would tell her all about it tomorrow.

Although Willie's description was vivid, it still left Fiona, and even Bill, wondering because Willie had said, "Mam, I've never heard her go on like she did. We were hardly in the house when she began to chatter. Not only did she talk to, but she talked at, Mr. Gallagher, if you know what I mean. She contradicted him when he got on about Sammy's father being a bruiser. Sammy was going to get on his high horse, but I stopped him. And she took it up and said that Mr. Davey was a lovely man and Mr. Gallagher didn't know him.

But then she became very tactful, you know, smarmy in fact, saying that he would have liked Mr. Davey if he had known him, and that he and you, Dad, would have got on like a house on fire. And so on, and so on."

To this, Fiona said, "She said all that?"

"Oh, yes. I've never heard her go on like it. You'd think she had

rehearsed something. And it was all so unexpected, I mean the visit.

We went because Daisy had said she wasn't coming to the party next week, and gave the reason why, which Katie couldn't see, and so Daisy yanked us all to their house to show us the reason. She said, if she accepted our invitation to come here, then we would expect an invitation from her family. So she was going to show us what kind of a family she had. And boy, she did! But then a number of things happened. Oh, it was a funny afternoon. You wouldn't believe it. " Then he went on to relate about the box of hairpins and the shell, and the attitude of the eldest son.

"It was towards the end, but quite a while before we came out, that she closed up like a clam. She was still sitting at the table opposite Mr.

Gallagher, and he was talking to her, but she made no come-backs at him. I happened to look at her: she was biting her lip as if she were making an effort to stop herself from crying. And she did cry, but not until we

reached a piece of waste land and a wall that hadn't been demolished, where she turned and laid her head against it and practically howled."

Fiona and Bill had looked at each other as if bemused, and Bill said, "Nobody had been rude to her then?"

"Oh, no. No. Just the opposite. I've told you, she held the floor.

Then she dried up like a clam. "

"Well, somebody must have said something."

"No, they didn't, Mam. No, they didn't, they

were as nice as pie. Well, as nice as pie as they could be. They're a

rough lot, especially the old man. "... It was later that night that Bill, taking Sammy apart, asked him, " What really happened at that visit this afternoon, Sammy? I mean, what happened to upset Katie? "

Sammy had looked at Bill for some seconds before he turned away and went and sat on the couch opposite the fire in the small sitting-room.

And still he didn't speak for some time. But Bill, seating himself at the further end of the couch, waited. And then Sammy said, "It's ..

it's hard to describe feelings, Mr. Bill, but the only way I can put it is, for the first time she sensed the feeling that must be in a failure, because Mr. Gallagher is of the type. He's bad now with bronchitis, I think. He's had pneumonia and has been a heavy drinker.