The Billionaire's Jackpot: Betting on You Series: Book Four (13 page)

Before he could turn the tables onto her about her feelings, she decided to change the subject.

“I was in the middle of making you a surprise breakfast. As you saw when you entered, things didn’t go exactly as planned. First I burnt the toast and then the bacon. At this point I’m not sure I would even attempt drinking the coffee I made.”

He arched a brow. “I thought you liked to cook.”

“I love to, but today was a day I should have ordered breakfast in bed for us.”

Drew’s lips curled. “Now you’re talking.”

Standing up, KJ said, “Don’t even think about it. That kitchen is a mess, and trust me, if you don’t clean it right away, it will only be worse later.”

Despite attempting to step away, he got up and swept her easily into his arms.

“I promise I’ll take care of it later. Right now there is only one thing I’m hungry for.” His lips claimed hers. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulled him closer. Her tongue played with his as they kissed.
I love kissing this man.
This was exactly where she wanted to be. Enjoying physically what he was not yet able to voice. His tenderness spoke volumes. For now, this was all she needed. Tomorrow she’d consider asking for more.

‡

K
J hadn’t been
sure what to expect when she had been invited to join them. Strippers, heavy drinking, and dancing maybe? That was not the case. The bachelorette party was more like a late-night dinner with the girls, filled with so much laughter she was surprised no one peed their pants.

For someone who had kept to herself for the past two years except for work, she was enjoying getting to know this interesting group of women. Each had her own story. They shared one common theme: all had overcome difficult struggles in life.

She knew Jill the best from when she’d come to Napa, but never would have guessed the journeys the others had been on. And yet they’d persevered in life and found happiness. KJ felt so fortunate to have shared this special occasion with them. Did her future hold such possibilities? Was Drew her prince charming or was she going to wake any moment and find it all just a lovely dream?
God, I hope not. But, if it wasn’t to be there wasn’t anything she could do about it.

“You’re awfully quiet, KJ. Are you missing Drew?” Jill asked.

KJ hadn’t meant to be rude. This party was supposed to be all about Lizette. There was no way she would talk about her love life or whatever it was. With a forced smile she replied, “Just soaking in all the crazy stories you guys are telling.”

Jill shook her head. “Don’t let her fool you, ladies. KJ has it bad for Drew.”

How she wished she had more control over her body’s reaction. Her face burned with embarrassment, and she was unable to speak.
Am I thirteen or thirty-two?
Any hope the others would let Jill’s comment slide was quickly shattered as the guest of honor questioned her.

“How bad is bad, KJ?” Lizette winked.

That is what I am trying to figure out.
KJ looked around the now quiet restaurant for anyone who could save her from this. Yes, Jill’s pros and cons list really helped her sort out some things, but that was only her feelings. It didn’t provide answers about what Drew was feeling. Saying the words out loud wasn’t going to make this any easier.

“Lizette, this party is about you and Jon, not Drew and me.”

Jill raised a hand in the group as though asking permission to go to the restroom. The other two looked at her, then gave their approving nod. Jill’s eyes glistened in excitement.
Oh God, I’m in for it.

Everyone was watching her, waiting for her reaction to whatever was going to come out of Jill’s mouth next.
Why did I agree to come?

“So, Miss O’Malley, last night at approximately eleven p.m., did you or did you not complete a pros and cons list?” Jill’s lips pursed trying to be a serious interrogator. She was anything but.

There really was no choice but to play along and give as little information as possible. Watching all those late night Law and Order episodes had prepared her well. Only answer the question asked. Don’t elaborate or it’s all over.

“I did.”

“And upon your review of such, were you able to determine your next course of action?” Jill’s lips curled as she tried to hold her composure. She was failing miserably.

If KJ wasn’t stressed out enough already, she was now.

“No.”

Jill could not hold her self-control any longer.

“KJ, you were writing like a mad woman when I left you last night. Don’t tell me the cons won. I won’t believe it. If you could’ve seen yourself as you were writing, you would understand. You love that man.”

“Easy, Jill,” Lizette said.

“Some things a person has to figure out for themselves,” Elaine added.

Jill leaned back in her chair, arms crossed in front of her but not taking her eyes off KJ. “You guys might be right, but my money is on another happily ever after.”

KJ averted her eyes, not wanting the truth to be revealed.
You and me both.

“Oh geez.” Elaine, eyes wide with shock, said, as she rubbed her well-rounded belly.

KJ jumped up, went to her side, and asked, “Is everything okay? Are you in pain?”

Elaine let out a long exhale before answering. “Someone is getting anxious to come out and meet you all. Good thing the wedding is this weekend or I might not make it.”

KJ placed her hands on Elaine’s stomach and felt around. The baby was kicking up a storm and repositioning itself.
Good. A healthy sign.
Then she instinctively reached for her wrist and took her pulse. Once satisfied there wasn’t anything urgent to be concerned about, she smiled and went back to her seat.

“Thank you, KJ. It really is nice having you here with us. I hope we didn’t cross the line with the questions about you and Drew.”

Normally it would’ve been considered too pushy but somehow it only made her feel more accepted as a part of this group.
I hadn’t realized how much I missed women friends to talk to.
They spoke to her as only good friends would, and she welcomed it.

“I appreciate you guys thinking of me.” Her voice softened then became serious. “It’s not him. It’s me I’m unsure about.”

“You mean your feelings for him?” Lizette asked.

Those were becoming clearer each day. That was the problem. She knew without a doubt she was falling in love with him. Though he tried to hide the loving, caring man he was, she was beginning to see through the act. She couldn’t blame him as she was doing the same herself. She knew there were still scars from her past she needed to deal with and wasn’t sure if they ever would heal. Things had improved since Drew had come to Napa, but she knew they hadn’t vanished. Drew had yet to witness her screaming and crying from reoccurring nightmares. Nightmares she wished had only been bad dreams.
Why would he want someone so broken when he could have any woman in the world?

“I have a lot of baggage.”
If he was already unsure about relationships, there was no way he would actually want someone like me. Someone so irreparably damaged.

Elaine reached across the table and covered KJ’s hand with hers. “Don’t we all. That is what makes us who we are. The one thing about love is that it accepts our baggage as part of us. And even though you can’t change the past, given the chance, you will see the bags feel so much lighter when you’re not carrying them alone. I’m speaking from personal experience. Where I was in my life ten months ago seems like a lifetime away. I was only able to find my way, and true happiness, once I submitted to the love.”

Damn, she is wise. Is it love I am feeling? It’s all so new to me. How can I be sure?
KJ was the main obstacle between her and her dreams. How was it she hadn’t seen it before? Or maybe she did and that was why she purposely distanced herself from everyone. From relationships. Friendships. Afraid they would see what she didn’t want them to. What was so refreshing was she knew she’d now have their support even though they didn’t know what the issues were. No judging, only unconditional acceptance.
True friends.
Opening herself up to such close friends was a big step for her. Not as big as it was going to be when she told Drew how she felt about him. She wasn’t sure what his response would be, but she wasn’t able to move forward if she wasn’t willing to take the first step.

KJ gave Elaine’s hand a squeeze, acknowledging she got the message. “Would you consider it rude if I cut out a bit early? There is something I need to take care of.”

The three women smiled warmly as they hugged her goodbye. Jill whispered, “Go get him,” in her ear before she let her go.
Should I? Am I really that brave?

While traveling back to the penthouse, amidst the honking horns and city street noises, KJ planned everything she would say and do when she got back. The scene played out like one of the sweet love stories she’d watched on the Hallmark Channel.
Can it really be that simple? I tell him how I feel, and he takes me in his arms, declaring his undying love?
Once inside the glass elevator, she pressed the 60
^th
floor, and entered the code he’d given her. Her heart raced as she focused solely on the door, still not comfortable enough to watch the view as it rose. KJ’s hands trembled, and she told herself it was just the elevator. That was the last thing on her mind right now.
What if he doesn’t feel the same way about me
? It was possible she’d misread him and he truly only wanted her for one thing: sex?
Great sex. Can’t be, can it? No, there has to be more to it.
His actions were those of someone who cared.
Is the sex so fantastic because of how I feel about him?
She had never felt like this for a man before. It was uncharted territory. Once she said the words to him, there would be no turning back at that point. Was it worth the risk?
Can I survive if he rejects my love?
A month ago she would have said no. Now, she knew it would scar her for life, but she would always be grateful for him bringing her back to a place where she felt alive again.

Her stomach turned and her nerves tingled as the ding announced her floor.
All or nothing!
The doors opened, she took a deep breath summoning all her courage, and exited.
Guess I’ll know soon enough.

‡

D
rew was lying
on the couch watching a football game when she entered the living room. The television was so loud he hadn’t heard the elevator open. Blossom was still on her mat out on the balcony.
Back so early.
There could be two reasons for that. Either she couldn’t wait to be back in his arms, or she didn’t enjoy her time out with the other women. Unfortunately, the expression on her face wasn’t one of want and desire. It was more serious, like she had a lot on her mind.
Damn.
I thought they would have hit it off
.
Looks like another bet I would have lost.
It would seem he was on a losing streak lately.
What’s with that? I always win. Everything.
It was the competitive edge he had. Without that, what was he left with?
Nothing.

Grabbing the remote from the coffee table, he turned off the TV and reached out a hand, inviting her to come and sit on his lap. No matter how bad her night had been, he would make her forget about it.

Katherine came over, but instead of sitting on or beside him, she sat on the coffee table opposite.
Oh, this is bad.
The words no man wants to say came out of his mouth before he could stop it.

“What’s wrong? Do you want to talk about it?”
NO!
He screamed internally.
What am I doing? I’m going to regret this.
Why was it when he was with her, he had no control over what came out of his mouth? He had never asked or cared before. Maybe that was the problem. He cared.
Damn, how did that happen?
Drew never should’ve invited her to stay with him. This closeness confused things. Made him feel things he had never felt before and act like a teenager with his first girlfriend.
This was not what I had planned.
His plan was bring her here, get whatever there was between them out of his system, and move on.
Simple.
So what went wrong?
It’s not her, it’s me. I changed the game.
Nothing had gone as planned and by the expression on her face it was about to get worse.
God, don’t let her say she wants to go home.
He wasn’t ready to let her go, not today, not tomorrow.