The Best of Times: A Dicken's Inn Novel (19 page)

“Okay,” he said firmly. “And you let me know if there’s anything you or Mom need. I mean it.”

“I will if you give me your phone number.”

“Of course,” he said, then he took his sister to Granny’s room where they all sat and talked and laughed until it became late. Jackson enjoyed just sitting back and observing these four women, wondering how such a moment as this had come to pass. He silently thanked God and figured that Chas being in his life surely had something to do with the presence of miracles in his life. He knew for certain that she was on a lot better terms with their Maker than he was.

CHAPTER 12

The following morning, Chas was surprised to see Jackson arrive in the dining room earlier than usual, wearing slacks, a button-up shirt and tie—much as he’d looked when he’d shown up for Thanksgiving dinner.

“Where are you going?” she asked after he’d given her a brief kiss in greeting.

He looked puzzled. “It’s Sunday. I told you I’d go to church with you.” Chas was so thrilled and pleasantly surprised that she couldn’t come up with a response. “Is there a problem?” he asked.

“No, of course not,” she said. “I’d love to have you go with me. I just thought that . . . with your family here, you would . . .”

“They’re sleeping in. I told them we’d be gone for a while today. When do we leave?”

“As soon as you eat your breakfast,” she said.

While Jackson ate, Chas made certain everything was under control for leaving Polly in charge. She was taken off guard by the multiple assaults of butterflies in her stomach at the thought of walking into church with a man, and having him sit beside her in a setting where she was so accustomed to being entirely alone. She couldn’t tell if she was nervous or excited, then concluded that she was excited for herself and nervous on Jackson’s behalf. She wondered what he might think, and how he might be received. For a man who had never given a thought to religion prior to his coming here, she hoped the experience wasn’t too overwhelming.

When they left the inn, he drove, and she gave him directions. “Something wrong?” he asked, pulling into a parking place at the church building.

“I guess I should warn you.”

“About what?” He put the car in Park and turned it off.

“There are a lot of really nice people here, but . . .”

“But?”

“But some of them might be a little
too
nice. They just get really excited when nonmembers show up. Just . . . don’t be put off.”

“I promise,” he said and got out. He opened the passenger door for her and took her hand to help her out, keeping hold of it as they went inside.

Chas saw many curious eyes turn in their direction as they entered the chapel, but Jackson appeared completely relaxed as a few people approached and introduced themselves. Chas kept introductions simple, telling people he was a very good friend. Once they were seated, Jackson put his arm on the bench behind her and asked, “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” she said and smiled at him. “It’s nice to not be alone.” He smiled in return and pressed a quick kiss to her brow. “Oh, I don’t know if you should have done that.”

He looked alarmed. “Is it against the rules to kiss in here?”

“No.” She laughed softly. “But now these people will
really
think there’s something romantic going on between us.”

“Is that a problem?”

“If it were, I wouldn’t have invited you to church.” She took hold of his hand. “But what do I tell them when you’re not here any more and people ask where you are?”

“Tell them he has every hope of returning . . . permanently.”

Chas inhaled his hope, and the meeting began. She discreetly noticed that Jackson was taking in the experience with cautious observation. The talks were focused on being charitable, and he listened attentively. When the meeting was over, they were greeted by a few more ward members, and the bishop approached and introduced himself.

“I’m Bishop Wegg,” he said to Jackson, offering a firm handshake and a smile. “I’d heard a rumor that Chas had a man in her life. I’m glad to know it’s true. It’s nice to have you here.”

“A pleasure,” Jackson said.

“We hope to see you here again,” the bishop said.

“Oh, I’ll be back,” Jackson replied with a smile.

They chatted comfortably for a couple of minutes before the bishop moved on. By then everyone else had gone to Sunday School classes.

“Now what?” Jackson asked.

“I usually go to a couple of classes, but I’d already decided I was going to skip them today. I think we should spend some time with your mother and sister.”

“They’re not going anywhere,” he said. “We can stay if you want.”

“Okay,” Chas said and led him to the Gospel Doctrine class where they found a couple of chairs near the back of the room. During the discussion of a New Testament text, Jackson again seemed attentive rather than bored; however, when that was over, Chas felt it would be best to go home and save the experience of sending him off to priesthood meeting without her for another time when he was better prepared. When she told him that the men and women separated for the next hour, he was more eager to leave.

“Thank you,” Chas said when they were in the car.

“For what?”

“For going with me.”

“Not a problem,” he said, driving toward the inn.

“Have you ever been to church before in your life?”

“Only for funerals and weddings,” he said.

“Then it all must seem very strange.”

“Not very,” he said. “In fact, it wasn’t nearly so strange as I might have imagined a Mormon church meeting to be.”

“You told the bishop you would be back. Was that based on religion or me?”

He chuckled and took her hand. “I’m mildly curious about the religion. I want to spend the rest of my life in the same room with you, wherever that may be. I hope that’s the right answer, because that’s the honest one.”

“I would never want you to be anything but honest with me.”

“And vice versa.”

They returned to the inn to find Melva and Melinda in the parlor. Polly had fed them a good breakfast, which they’d just finished because they’d slept very late. Chas watched Jackson greet both women with a kiss on the cheek, then he pulled off his tie while he sat on the couch beside his mother to chat. It was truly a day of miracles.

Melva and Melinda stayed three nights at the inn, and Chas thoroughly enjoyed being a witness to the miracles of healing and forgiveness taking place. Jackson said more than once to her when they were alone together that he deeply regretted not bridging this gap sooner. She told him that regret accomplished nothing because the past couldn’t be changed, and she suggested that perhaps the intensity of feelings throughout the long separation had helped the healing to be more deep and complete. Chas was also a witness to Jackson surprising Polly with a big hug.

“What was that for?” she asked with a giggle.

“For being efficient with those address labels,” he said, and she giggled again.

During the days that Melva and Melinda were in town, Chas had Polly and Jen put in extra hours to cover for her so that she and Jackson could take them out on the town to see some local sights. They took a drive through Washoe Park, which looked lovely in the winter, but Chas told them they should all come back in the summer when they could walk through it and enjoy an entirely different kind of beauty. They also went to the library, which was a beautiful old building that had been well preserved. Chas discovered that Jackson really liked old buildings—another thing they had in common. The following day they went to a movie at the Washoe Theater, which was also a beautiful building. The building definitely caught Jackson’s attention more than the movie, but Chas had seen the building before. She enjoyed sitting next to Jackson and sharing his popcorn. She also enjoyed seeing him so happy, especially considering the current challenges in his life.

When it came time for Melva and Melinda to leave for the airport, they all cried a little—except for Melva, who cried a lot. But there was more joy than sorrow in this farewell, since Jackson had given all of his contact information to both his mother and sister, and he promised to call them both every week, and even to pay a visit as soon as his work allowed. From the way he said that, Chas knew that his mind was drifting toward the need to return to Virginia and to his job.

Jackson felt a stark letdown after his mother and sister left. Their being here had made it easier to push aside all that was going on back in Virginia with the people he cared for there. The intensity of his grief and shock had settled, but he felt concerned and unsettled over the matter. Once again he made calls to several people, just to touch base with them and learn all he could about what had happened and where things stood now. He was able to talk with the two men who were in the hospital, and felt much better after he did. They were both coming along nicely and were in good spirits. One would be going home in a couple of days, and the other a few days after that. They both told him they were grateful to be alive, and that the plus side to all of this was they would get to spend more time with their families through the holidays while they were recuperating.

Jackson didn’t want to, but felt that he needed to call the widow of the man who had taken his own life. He talked it through with Chas, and she helped him see the perspective that Ken’s wife was probably struggling with more grief and heartache than Dave’s wife, Mary, because Dave had at least died an honorable death. In both cases, the wives were innocent victims. He appreciated Chas’s feminine perspective on the matter, and took her suggestion to send flowers to both widows. But first he called them. He’d spoken to Mary a few times since Dave’s death, but he felt the need to connect with her again. She was doing as well as could be expected, but she told him more than once how much she appreciated his calls. And she told him something she hadn’t shared with him before, that Dave had often told her how much he admired and respected him, and what a privilege it had been to work with him. Jackson could only say, “The feeling was mutual.”

The call to the other widow started out a little rough, but once he was able to say that he wanted her to know he’d been thinking about her and hoped she was doing well, they were able to have a straightforward conversation. She admitted that her husband hadn’t been himself for a very long time, and she’d been worried. She confessed that she was struggling with guilt over feeling some relief that he was gone. She worried over what other damage he might have caused if he were still alive. Jackson was able to say that he was struggling with the same feelings. They both cried a little, which felt strange, since they had met only briefly on a few occasions. He apologized for not having been at the memorial service since he was out of state. She told him that she’d been amazed at how many people from the agency had come, and how kind they had been. He was glad to hear that. He wished her well and gave her his contact information, making her promise that she would call him if there was anything he could ever do to help.

After the calls had been made and the flowers ordered, Jackson sat in the parlor while Granny slept and Chas was in the office with Polly. He tried to read the paper but couldn’t focus. He wondered if the feeling he had that he needed to get back to work was simply habit, which had been motivated by connecting with the people he knew there, or if he really needed to be there. The thought of leaving before Christmas felt horrid. At Thanksgiving he had believed that he’d be home long before Christmas, even if it had meant spending Christmas all alone. He’d now received multiple invitations to spend Christmas Day with families who would include him in all the fun and fineness of a good holiday. But he wanted to be here with Chas. At Thanksgiving he’d been concerned about imposing himself on their family celebrations. Now Chas and Granny felt like family to him, and he knew they felt the same about him. He knew that Chas’s friends would also be a part of the celebrations, but he’d grown fond of Polly and Charlotte, and her children, and the whole prospect seemed delightful.

But he wondered if staying would only prolong the inevitable—the need to go back and face what he’d left behind. Or did he need to face it at all? He could call right now and tell them he was retiring. The work would get shifted to someone else, and he could go back later and clean out his apartment. There wasn’t much he owned that couldn’t be sold or given away. He could ask Chas to marry him, and then take up his new life as an innkeeper—provided she said yes, of course. He could start taking more of an active role in the running of the inn, and he could be happy here for the rest of his life. He knew he could. He didn’t even have to question it. And yet he felt drawn back to Virginia. Was it habit, or his gut telling him that he needed to be there? Perhaps his spending Christmas there could help his friends who were struggling with the same emotional whirlwind that he was facing. He felt confused and uncertain, and thought of what Chas had told him about the way she made decisions. He’d never made prayer a part of his life at all until he’d met Chas. And since then it had been nothing more than a silent expression of gratitude here and there. Now he wondered if God would answer his prayers the way He did for Chas. Could he be given divine guidance on the matter at hand? Deciding that there was nothing to lose, he closed his eyes and simply asked God to help him make the right choices at this crucial time in his life. He’d barely finished the thought when Chas came into the room.

“You okay?” she asked.

“Just thinking,” he said, holding out a hand for her. She took it and sat beside him. He put his arm around her, and she tucked her feet up beneath her, resting her head on his shoulder.

“Tell me,” she urged. He hesitated, and she said, “You’re wondering if you should be going back.”

“How do you do that?” he asked.

“I just know you, but I was still guessing.”

“Well, you’re right. I admit it. I hate to even face it or bring it up, but . . .”

“I know, Jackson. I understand.” She wrapped her arms around him, and he heard her voice quaver. “I don’t want you to go, but I understand.”

He blew out a harsh breath. “I could retire right now,” he said, “and I’m certain the work would go on without me just fine. There are some loose ends on a few cases that I would like to take care of myself, but the world wouldn’t end if I turned them over to somebody else.” He went on to explain in more detail all of his thoughts and feelings, realizing as he did so that it had become clear to both of them that he needed to go back. He just didn’t know when or for how long.

“You don’t have to decide right this minute,” she said. “I can understand why it might be good for you to be among friends there for Christmas, but I’m not going to pretend that I don’t want you here for the holidays. It just won’t feel right without you. However, I’m not going to whine and try to manipulate you into staying for the wrong reasons. You have to do what you feel is best.”