The Bathrobe Knight (43 page)

The White-Wings, struggling as they were pulled to the ground by the ice chains, seemed to almost scream in horror. The sky was their advantage, it was their Racial right to live in the skies, and now they were being grounded in knee-high water. And if they weren’t screaming in horror from the chains pulling them to the ground, they were definitely shouting in pain as the eager, hungry Turtle-Wolves and Spear-wielding Scouts began preying on them the second they touched the ground. Without a dive, without any mobility, they were sitting ducks for their enemies wading in the blood-red water below.

Even though none of them were worth a terrible amount of EXP, Kass couldn’t help but notice her bar was slowly shooting up from the sheer volume of the kills. It might not be enough to hit another level, but it was still better than nothing, and EXP was the reason she had stuck with Darwin to begin with. It was the reason she had been okay with ignoring the very real struggle Darwin was probably going through.
Stop it Kass, you’re thinking about Darwin again. You’re in the middle of committing good, old-fashioned, home-grown avian genocide on a level that would make Colonel Sanders proud, so stay focused and turn these White-Wings into dodo birds.

Everything was going down smoother than a well-aged wine, especially with the spell ‘Winter is Coming’ shackling more people than the interest on student loans, when all of a sudden Kass noticed something terrifying. While all the other White-Wings that Darwin was killing only had the standard two wings and angel-like appearance, this particular one was different. He had four massive wings sprouting out of his back that dwarfed his allies’ wings. He was well over two meters tall and wore Steel, not Leather, Armor. Instead of the two Daggers or Bow and Arrow that she saw being used by all the other White-Wings, he was wielding a Sword and a Shield, and he was coming right at Darwin.

“What the heck is that?” she mumbled to herself out loud, almost losing her concentration on the ‘Winter is Coming’ spell. “Fuzzy Wuzzy! Get to Darwin! I got a bad feeling about this!” she yelled as soon as she was able to get her concentration back on the spell.

Fuzzy Wuzzy, who was behind the Hydra, rolling on its back and swatting its giant, ice breathing-bubble with its paws, stood up and looked at Kass while poking the bubble with a claw.
I did not make that bubble that thick. Stop being lazy!
Kass wanted to shout, but instead decided not to waste time. “Blake! Bust that bubble for Fuzzy Wuzzy so he can go help Darwin. And go with him too!”

Blake didn’t question her at all, but rather just appeared behind Fuzzy Wuzzy with the same creepy trick Alex always used and broke the bubble with his Spear before the two of them started running towards Darwin.
You two better keep him safe,
Kass wished after them, but she herself knew that she needed to maintain the spell or the battle would be lost.

Kass kept up the spell, but she felt like she was watching in horror as the armored, four-winged Commander got closer to Darwin. It was just about to ready itself and make a dive when three White-Wings, not red-eyes like Darwin’s Zombies, struck it in the back one after the other. They didn’t manage to do more than hurt one of its wings before the Commander sped up so fast in the air he almost disappeared like Alex, charging them with his shield and knocking them forward into the area a dozen meters ahead of Kass.

Kass, looked at them. “Are you three okay? Why are you attacking one of your own?” she couldn’t help but ask.

“We haven’t been on the White-Wing side since they tried to kill us,” the only male of the three said, standing up and brushing off his shoulders then his wings. As the other two stood up, Alex, Justin and two other scouts materialized behind them.

“Do we kill them, Lady Kass?” Alex asked as he trained his Spear on them.

“No, they’ve got a story they can tell us after the fight is over. Until then, I need you all to make sure that thing doesn’t kill Darwin,” Kass said, pointing at the four-winged beast who was once again readying his dive for Darwin.

“I wish I could, Lady Kass,” Justin said, staring at the armored angel, “unfortunately the great Lord Darwin’s orders are final. He saw it when the fight started and commanded us to protect you should it engage us directly.”

Blake came back with Fuzzy Wuzzy too. “I was sent back as well, Lady Kass.”

What? Protect me? I can die, you idiot! You can’t!
her voice yelled inside her head.
You made me ask you out, and now you’re going to die before I ever even get that date!
she thought, protesting fiercely in her mind.

“Well, do you mind removing the Spears so we go after it again? I don’t think the ‘Great Lord Darwin’ ordered us to do anything,” the male White-Wing spoke again, his hands over his head in the traditional surrender pose. “I mean, do you really want the ‘Great Lord Darwin’ to fight on his own? Against a Faction Leader, Lady Kass, was it?”

Kass wanted to tell him to go, but she needed to know first what type of threat Darwin faced, if she was over-reacting or if he was in real danger. “Faction Leader? What level are they generally?”

“This one, he’s about Level 65 to 70 like all of the other Faction Leaders. He’s the unrivalled leader of the White-Wings,” one of the two girl White-Wings answered this time. “He also has all the standard NPC Boss buffs.”

“Move you lumbering beast!” she yelled at the Hydra, ignoring the three White-Wing prisoners.
It may not be enough, but I still have to try,
she thought as the Hydra started rushing towards Darwin. She watched as the Angel flew upwards higher into the sky again, preparing for its dive. Once it took head, she knew she wouldn’t make it in time. She closed her eyes and gulped, she couldn’t watch. She could only pray that when he died, he’d respawn like she would.

*CLANG!* a loud metallic sound, louder than any of the clashing Spears, Knives, Armor and Axes across the battlefield, wrung out from where Darwin was. Kass shut her eyes even tighter for a second, afraid to look as the Hydra barrelled towards Darwin’s position.

*Clang!* the metallic sound shot out again.
Is Darwin fighting?
she thought, opening her eyes to find Darwin was momentarily nowhere in sight.
Darwin? Did you live? Are you okay?
she panicked.
Where did you go?
she worried, scanning the battlefield until she saw him, flat on his butt behind a man who had taken his spot on the field: the King. Kass would recognize his face anywhere. It was still the first one you saw during the intro sequence when picking a Human, and he was the only Human who wore a Crown to battle.

“I see your Bathrobe has gotten a little fancier since we last met,” the King said to Darwin behind him as he held his Sword out towards the four-winged Commander, now grounded with his Sword and Shield in a defensive position.

Wait, Darwin knows the King? When did he meet the King?
she thought, the shock of the King’s appearance causing her to forget the Boss-level mob threatening their life in front of them.

“Yeah, what can I say? Came with the new job title.” Darwin stood up, leveling his Sword into his own combat stance. “By the way, thanks for the help.”

“I had to help you out when I saw that you were stuck with a Sword and not your weapon of preference, silverware,” the King laughed. It was like the two were long-lost friends. “To be fair, your sister was the one who sent me though. She said I would need to assist you here. She said you would strike the enemy from the north, and this Commander would try to kill you, and I needed to interfere before you were saved.”

“Before I was saved?” Darwin asked, almost dropping his stance.

“You are Eve’s brother, no?” the King said, the two standing there chatting right in front of the enemy.

“Yes, I am Eve’s brother, but you came to help me before I was saved?” Darwin said, not turning his head to look at him while he was talking. “Don’t you mean before I am killed?”

“No, he, like, totes means saved,” a voice Kass immediately recognized said from behind her. She was about to turn around and look when two hands shot over her eyes casting her vision into darkness. “No peeking, girlfriend.”

“Stephanie!” Darwin called out to the person behind her.

Medusa . . . no wonder she covered my eyes.

“Sorry, Darwin, I, like, totes had an awesome entrance planned when I saw the lead female from Touched by an Angel’s first kid get all grumpus in metal at you, but the Burger King boy wouldn’t let me have it my way,” she apologized, as she pulled her hands away from Kass’s eyes.

Kass, eyes now firmly closed again, was afraid to look. She knew what happened to those who gazed on the Medusa, but the need to see what was going on was slowly almost killing her.
What are they doing?

“It seems I’m too late to fulfill Eve’s request,” the King said in a disappointed voice that made Kass think she could almost hear his frown. “In that case, I am told to pass on a message. Stephanie, you were supposed to only deliver the Stone to Darwin, not meddle further.”

“Message, like, recieved grandpa grumps,” Stephanie said with her usual high-pitched bubble gum voice, but then it switched to a darker tone that chilled Kass more than any of her frost spells. “But if you come between us again, I will end you.”

“I’m just delivering the message. Take it up with Eve if you have further concerns. I don’t want to get between you two,” the King said, his voice lacking the same bold bass it had before Stephanie had showed up.

“Like, whatevs. Anyways, honey! Did you miss me?” Stephanie was back to her high pitch.

Honey? Why is she calling Darwin honey? Why should he be missing her? What did they do in that room when I wasn’t there?
Kass started to feel a little jealous.

“Been a little busy to miss anyone,” Darwin dodged the question.

Kass could hear stone crumbling in the background. For some reason Darwin and the King weren’t affected, but from the sound of breaking rocks, it was clear that many of the White-Wings around them weren’t so fortunate.

“Well, like, missing me or not, I think you like totes promised me some ice cream, and I thought I’d come here and collect,” Stephanie said.

“I’d love to sit down and get some ice cream, but I kind of have to stop these bird men from making it far enough into the Human lands to turn into lawyers,” Darwin said, laughing a bit.

How can you be so light-hearted right now? Getting ice cream with her? You’re supposed to be taking me out to a nice lunch.
Kass’s jealousy flared up more. She started telling herself that Stephanie’s strength was the only reason Darwin was playing along with her. There was no way he would be into a girl who talked like that.
Why do I even care? It’s not like we’re an item anyways.

“Oh, that uncooked serving of chicken pot pie and his rotisserie club? Don’t get your panties in a bunch over them. I can, like, totes take care of it right now if you want,” Stephanie said. “It’s like no problem at all, but you’ll like owe me more than ice cream. Maybe dinner and a movie?”

“If you don’t mind a boat ride: I don’t think I plan on hanging around these lands,” Darwin said.

Wait, he’s not planning on bringing her with us?
Kass found herself hoping her face wasn’t as red as it felt.

“Deal,” Stephanie said. The agreement was followed by an awful bone-wrenching sound.

“Did you just Mola Ram Temple of Doom him?” Darwin asked immediately after.

“I know when I’m not needed,” the King said.

“Yeah, I like told you I love me some Indiana Jones.” Stephanie sounded very happy with herself. “Like, off for a moment, Dear. Be back with the bacon. Kassy girl, you can open your eyes.”

Kass waited a second just to be sure, then opened her eyes to see the carnage. The King was gone, and Darwin was standing over the four-winged commander, who lay dead on the ground with his chest ripped open. Everywhere she could see the White-Wings were either statues, decapitated or gorily missing limbs. Only the Turtle-Wolves and a dozen White-Wings that Darwin had converted into red-eyes were still standing and not simply torn-up pieces scattered about like red leaves in fall.