The Back of Beyond
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Authors: Doris Davidson
The Back of Beyond
The Back of Beyond
DORIS DAVIDSON
This eBook edition published in 2015 by
Birlinn Ltd
West Newington House
10 Newington Road
Edinburgh
EH9 1QS
Copyright © Doris Davidson 2002
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form without the express written permission of the publisher.
eBook ISBN: 9780857907011
Version 1.0
British Library Cataloguing-in-Publication Data
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
The Back of Beyond
Like Rosie Jenkins in the story, I love my whole brood, each of them ever ready to help me with anything I need to know, or anywhere I want to go. So, my eternal thanks to Jimmy, Sheila and John, Alan, Bertha and Bill, and Debra.
Matthew, of course, deserves a special mention. At fourteen, most youngsters steer clear of elderly Grans, but he helps me in so many ways, not least by keeping my mind young, for which I am very grateful.
Then there is Susan Opie, my editor, whose patience must be stretched to breaking point with my persistence in sending her manuscripts which are far too long, and because I use too much of the Doric, a dialect which people outside Aberdeenshire find impossible to understand. At my age, however, I find it very difficult to change. Sorry, Susan! And thanks!
Contents
1929â1939
Chapter 1
âYou'll have to tell her the night, Ally â we're leaving first thing in the morning.'
Alistair Ritchie gave a rueful sigh. âI suppose I will, Dougal, but I'm dreading it.'
âYou should have let her see ages ago she was wasting her time.'
âI did try, but she's got it in her head I'm the only one for her, and nothing'll shift it.'
Dougal Finnie gave an exaggerated sigh. âI'm right sorry for you. It must be terrible to be that irresistible to women.'
Annoyed by his pal's smirking sarcasm, Alistair burst out, âYou wouldna think it was funny if it was you.'
Having arrived outside the Finnies' house, Dougal turned in at the gate, still laughing, and Alistair swung his leg over the bar of his bicycle to continue on his way home from work, his mind going over what had led to the momentous step he was to take the following day. He had made the decision when he and Dougal were propped against the back wall of the kirkyard a week and a half ago â a secluded corner where they told each other things they wouldn't, couldn't, tell anyone else â and he'd been complaining as he so often did nowadays about Lexie Fraser pestering him. âShe's been after me since we were still at school, but it's got worse since â¦'
âSome lads wouldna mind that,' Dougal had grinned. âShe's a real bonnie lassie.'
âOh, she's bonnie enough, but since her father walked out on them, there's been something ⦠off-putting about her, like she'd smother me wi' love if she got half a chance.' He paused, then said reflectively, âThat was a funny business, wasn't it? I'd have said Alec and Carrie Fraser were a real devoted couple, and I can hardly believe what folk's saying about him, and yet â¦'
Dougal screwed up his nose. âMy Mam says there's nae smoke withoot fire. Dinna forget Nancy Lawrie left just the day afore him, and she's never come back, either. They musta been meeting someplace else to keep it secret, but folk's nae daft.'
âI canna help feeling sorry for Lexie, for she doted on her father, but it looks like she's trying to get me to make up for what he did. Every time I go out a walk wi' her, she's all over me like a rash you've just got to scratch, and I'm feared I'll give in some night and do something I shouldna.'
The twinkle in Dougal's eyes had deepened at that. âI'm surprised you havena done it already.'
âHave
you
done it wi' somebody?'
âDozens o' times. You dinna ken what you're missing, Ally, I bet Lexie's hot stuff.'
âI wouldna mind trying it, but nae wi' her. I feel like running the other way every time she comes near me.' He had hesitated briefly, then added, âTo be fair, though, I think she just needs ⦠somebody to ⦠Her Mam canna be much company.'
After a moment's silence, Dougal had looked at his friend thoughtfully. âHow would you like to be rid o' her ⦠for good?'
âI'm desperate to get rid o' her, for she clings to me like a blooming leech, but I draw the line at murder. You should ken me better than that, Dougal Finnie!'
âI didna say
get
rid o' her, you gowk! I said
be
rid o' her. You see, Ally, I'm sick fed up o' working for Bill Rettie in the garage, aye clarted wi' oil and grease, and nae chance o' promotion. Any road, what he pays me hardly buys a packet o' fags, so I've made up my mind to go to London and look for a better job. What about coming wi' me?'
His first reaction, Alistair recalled, had been to say no. After two years of being delivery boy and general sweeper-up for the butcher in Bankside, the village four miles west of Forvit, he had recently been taken on as an apprentice to learn the trade. It would be a few years before he got a decent wage, but it was a steady job and he wasn't keen to give that up. On the other hand ⦠he'd be well away from Lexie in London. âWhen was you thinking on going?'
âAs soon as you like. I could go to Aberdeen on Saturday and book our passages â the boat's a lot cheaper than the train. Are you on?'
âUm ⦠um â¦' Deciding that the pros more than outweighed the cons, Alistair had given a decisive nod. âAye, I'm on â if my dad'll stump up the money for my fare.'
His mother hadn't been too pleased about it, though. It wasn't the money, just the fact that he was going so far away from home. âYou're only new sixteen,' she had said, sadly, âower young to be on your own in a place the size o' London.'
âI'll nae be on my own, Mam, I'll be wi' Dougal.'
She had shaken her head at this. âHe's never been a good example to you, aye getting you in some kind o' mischief.'
His father had come to his defence here. âAch, Bella, leave the laddie be! It's time he was taking a bit o' responsibility for himsel', showed some independence ⦠and Dougal'll keep him right.'
Alistair smiled at the memory of this contradictory statement. Dougal had always told him what to do, not that he was a bully. Far from it. He was the best friend a boy â or man, come to that â could ever have, though he was inclined to jump first and think after. Anyway, his father had given him his fare money, and in the morning, his mother had pressed two pound notes into his hand to keep him, hopefully, till he found a job.
But he still had one thing to do before he left Forvit.
Alistair's steps were slow and reluctant as he went to meet Lexie Fraser for the last time. He dreaded the scene there was bound to be, and was afraid he might say something she could take the wrong way. If she thought for a minute that he felt something for her, she would spread it about that she was his girl, and if he
did
something he shouldn't, she might say he'd put her in the family way and he'd have to marry her. Aye, he'd have to watch his step tonight.
With Benview three miles from the village and the Frasers' house half a mile this side of it, they'd never walked in the woods between Forvit and Bankside like the other courting couples. Their trysting place was midway between their homes, where a footpath from the road led up to a tower which had been built as a look-out post during the Napoleonic Wars by the then Earl of Forvit. It was here that Alistair meant to break the news.
Although there was a track from his house diagonally up to the tower itself, he always went down to the road to meet her, and she was there first, as she always was. She hadn't heard him coming, and he wondered for the umpteenth time why he felt as he did about her. She
was
a bonnie lassie, fair-haired like himself but maybe about five feet two to his five ten, with rosy cheeks and blue eyes a shade lighter than his. She had a good figure for sixteen, her bust not too big nor yet too small, her middle nipped in by the belt of her navy trench coat, the one she had worn to school. She had once made him span her waist, and he'd nearly been able to make the tips of his fingers meet. She thought her bottom was too big, but to his mind it wasn't all that bad ⦠quite neat, really.
She turned at the sound of his footsteps and tucked her arm through his when they got on to the stony track. Her chattering didn't annoy him as much as it normally did â in fact, he was glad that she didn't expect him to do any of the talking â but when they came nearer to the tower his stomach started to churn at the prospect of what he had to do.
They sat down in the small niche she had recently begun referring to as âour special place', and when she came to the end of a long, involved story about something that had happened in the general store which she helped her mother to run since her father left, he cleared his throat nervously. âI've something to tell you, Lexie.' His heart sank at the way her eyes lit up, and what he had planned to say died on his lips.
âGo on,' she urged. âSay it, Al ⦠darling.'
It was far worse than he had imagined â she must think he was going to say he loved her â but it had to be done. âI ⦠that is, me and Dougal â¦' Her horrified expression made him race on. â⦠we're going to Aberdeen first thing in the morning.'
The renewed hope in her eyes told that she had jumped to the wrong conclusion. She must think he was taking his friend with him for advice on buying something for her, an engagement ring, maybe. âI'm sorry, Lexie,' he said quietly, âwe've booked our passages on the London boat.'
âYou're going to London?' she gasped. âWhat for?'
âTo look for decent jobs. We'll never make anything of ourselves here.'
âBut Al ⦠you and me ⦠what about us?'
Her blue eyes had dimmed, practically brimming with tears, but he had to be brutal. âI've tried telling you before, Lexie. There's no us, not the way you'd like. I'm sorry, but that's the way it is.'
âBut, Al ⦠I thought ⦠you felt the same about me â¦'
âI've never felt that way about you, Lexie. I like you, but that's all.'
The tears flooded out now, and he sat uneasily silent while she sobbed, âYou do love me, Al, I know you do!'
He hated her calling him Al, it reminded him of that awful gangster Capone he'd read about, but he also hated to see her crying. âAw, Lexie,' he muttered, sliding his arm awkwardly round her shoulders, âyou'll find somebody else.'
âI don't want anybody else!' Turning to him, she laid her head against his chest. âI love you! I've always loved you and I always will!' Her mood changed like quicksilver, and she looked up at him accusingly. âYou're just like my father, you're deserting me and all, and you don't care what happens to me.'
He was outraged by this. âThat's not fair! I never pretended to be anything more than a friend, and at least I've told you I'm going away. Any road, it's not up to me to look after you, that's your mother's responsibility, and your father'll likely come back once he's ⦠Please try to understand, Lexie. I need to get away. I want to make something of my life, and even if I don't, I won't come back here. I don't like hurting you, Lexie, but that's the way it is.'
Her eyes were beseeching now, her words a mere whisper. âYou'll surely give me a goodbye kiss?'
Feeling a proper heel, he bent his head to her upturned mouth and was immediately engulfed in a suffocating embrace. Frantically, he tried to think how to extricate himself without physically hurting her, for her passionate kisses were making an unwanted desire start in him, a desire he had no wish to fulfil.
âStop it!' he shouted, shoving her roughly away and scrambling to his feet. âI know what you're trying to do, but it won't work! I've told you â I don't love you and I'm leaving wi' Dougal in the morning.'
She looked at him pathetically now. âBut ⦠you'll come back to me?'
âIf I come back, it'll only be for a visit, to see my mother and father. Now, get up and I'll see you home.'
âDamn you, Alistair Ritchie!' she shouted. âYou've just been amusing yourself wi' me and you're abandoning me like my father, and I never want to see you again! Go away and leave me alone!'
âI can't leave you up here by yourself in the dark. Come on, Lexie, be sensible.'
âSensible?' Her voice had risen several tones. âHow can I be sensible when you've just said you don't love me any more? You led me on, and I'll never forgive you!'
âI didna lead you on, Lexie,' Alistair said, desperately, âI never said I loved you ⦠it was all in your mind. Come on now, stand up and I'll take you back.'
She got to her feet slowly, refusing the hand he held out although she stumbled over the stones in their path when they made their way down the hill. They had almost reached the road when she murmured, with a little hiccup, âWhat would you think if I killed myself? That's what I feel like doing.'
Sure that this was an attempt at moral blackmail, he snapped, âI'd say you were mad!'
âI
am
mad ⦠mad about you,' she whispered, stopping to look at him with her blue eyes wide and pleading.
âYou'll soon forget me. Look, Lexie, you're just making things worse. Even if I wasn't going away, there'd never be anything between us, not on my side, any road.' In an effort to coax her out of her self-inflicted misery, he took her hand. âGive's a smile, Lexie. I don't want us to part on bad terms.'
âBut you still want us to part?'
âIt's best.'
âFor you, maybe, not for me.' She yanked her hand out of his. âBut have it your own way, Alistair Ritchie! Go to London and do what you like!'
âI will, then, and you can see yourself home from here!' He turned and strode back towards the track that led to his house, seething at her for being difficult yet feeling guilty for hurting her. Not that he should feel guilty, for she had done all the chasing, made all the advances. Of course, once he realized what was in her mind, he should have let her know he wasn't interested, but she likely wouldn't have listened.
Having watched Alistair stamping out of sight, Lexie walked on down to the road. She
had
felt suicidal a few minutes ago, but not any longer; she needed a man to depend on more than ever. She had often heard that jobs weren't so easy to come by in London, and he'd be back in a few months with his tail between his legs.
Her mother looked up in surprise when she went into the house. âYou havena bidden long wi' Alistair the night.'
Lexie flung her coat on a chair. âWe'd a row! Him and Dougal Finnie's going away to London in the morning.'
âThat's funny. Meg Finnie was in the shop yesterday and she said her Dougal was leaving, but she never said Alistair Ritchie was going wi' him.'
âDougal had forced him. He wouldn't have wanted to go.'
Although Carrie Fraser's interest in other people had dimmed since her husband had walked out on her, her judgement of character was still as shrewd as ever. âI aye thought he wasna as keen on you as you was on him,' she observed.
