But it may have still been too late. The lingering taste of her blood made him gag and he wiped the back of his hand across his lips trying to erase the metallic tinge. A canned soda appeared before him, and he glanced up at Brit, who held it out for him. “Drink it.”
The can shook in his hand as he took it. After cracking the top, he chugged half the contents, thankful that the dewy carbonation washed away the reminder of what he’d done. If only it could wash away his thoughts just as easily. Nothing would ever get rid of those. He’d killed his mate, the woman he was made to protect forever. Tore her apart with no conscious mind.
He fisted both hands and pressed them to his forehead, and clenched his teeth against a wave of grief so intense it threatened to be the destruction of him. “What have I done?”
The door opened, then slammed behind a man dressed in a suit. As he strode toward Aidan, he put on his stethoscope. Without an introduction, without any preamble, the man squatted in front of Aidan and placed the scope on the right side of his chest under his rib cage and listened.
After a few minutes of silences and moving the scope, the man sighed and stood. “Beast is where it should be. How do you feel, Aidan?”
Sick. Horrified. “Jaylin. Is she…”
“No. She has some puncture wounds on her neck, but you shifted before any significant damage could be done. She’s being treated by Pam as we speak.”
If he’d been standing, he would’ve fallen to the floor from the relief that rushed through him. “So, I didn’t…”
“She’s fine. A little shaken up, but fine.”
She had to be terrified of him now. Since he’d met her, he’d proven that everything she’d read in her books wasn’t always gospel, and now she could add this to her list too.
A woman wasn’t safe with her mate.
“What’s the last thing you remember, Aidan?”
Aidan looked up sharply at the tall blond man. “Who are you?”
“Oh. Sorry.” The man held out his hand. “Dr. Trevor Klaus.”
“You’re Liam’s therapist.”
“That’s correct. Now I need some information. What is the last thing you remember?”
He pushed aside the only thing he could think of right now, which was attacking Jaylin. All he encountered was a big black hole of nothing. He thought deeper, and slowly the darkness lifted and he was faced with a new horror. The struggle. The desire to kill. Jaylin dying. He swallowed against the bile rising in his throat. “Fighting the beast after I shocked Jaylin the second time.”
“You remember nothing about the last week?”
“Week?” He snapped his head up, staring at Dr. Klaus. “What do you mean week?”
“Aidan, you’ve been in animal form since you shocked Jaylin.”
“That’s not possible.” He was always conscious when in beast form. Aware of every movement, interaction, and thought. Having final say over the beast’s actions. This time, however, it felt like no time had passed since he’d been forcing his beast away from Jaylin as she’d lain helpless on the bed. When he came to, and had felt her throat between his teeth, he’d thought the beast had won. “All I remember are those last minutes on the island. I don’t understand how that can be.”
“None of us really grasp what the flash does. All we know is if a healthy shifter is close to the flash when it goes off, the beast becomes rabid and tries to emerge, but the effects wear off pretty quickly once the flash is over and the human side is usually able to maintain control. In this instance,
you
were holding the
Splycer
and received the full impact of the flash.”
“My beast was determined to get out. I’ve never fought it as hard as I did that night. It was torture. It broke my body with a single-minded focus to get out and kill Jaylin.”
Trevor nodded. “This is only speculation, but we think the combination of the flash making your beast rabid and the following struggle for domination severed the connection between you and your beast.”
Aidan rubbed his eyes, stunned at the implication Dr. Klaus was making. “Where my beast won, and I left my mate helpless.”
“Listen to me.” Trevor placed a hand on Aidan’s shoulder and squatted before him so they were eye to eye. “The animal we’ve dealt with all week was not a shifter’s beast. There was no human in it. We think that once the beast emerged, it put your human side in some kind of comatose state. With you gone, the beast lost its humanity and became an animal. You’re connected to it now. The two of you are one again.”
“Are we?”
How could he ever be sure this wouldn’t happen again?
He’d lost time. A week’s worth of time. He could’ve done anything, hurt anyone, and he would never have been the wiser. He pinned Liam with his gaze, knowing if anyone in this room would be honest with him, it would be him. “How did I treat Jaylin this week?”
Liam inhaled deeply, but returned his gaze, unflinching. “You were most aggressive toward her.”
“Was there any other instance where I tried to hurt her?”
Liam’s jaw tightened, but he remained silent. He didn’t need to speak. Aidan had his answer. There was no guarantee Jaylin was safe with him any longer, no guarantee that when he saw her again he wouldn’t turn into a savage animal and try to finish what he didn’t succeed in doing today.
There was no guarantee that one day he wouldn’t turn on her again.
“Okay then.” Aidan nodded, making a choice that made his beast roar. While that should’ve comforted him, let him know that his beast was one with him once again, the rage emanating from it only solidified his decision. He’d never put Jaylin in harm’s ways. If that meant protecting her from him, then he would.
He would finally honor her wishes and give her what she’d wanted from the start—he’d let her go.
Chapter Thirteen
Jaylin tightened her grip on the steering wheel as she sped down the winding road toward Aidan’s cabin. She could kill Trevor. Had the man lost his ever-loving mind?
How could he let Aidan just leave like that?
When she’d posed that exact question to Trevor, his response had been the classic excuse of, “He’s a grown man. He can do what he wants.”
What a load of crap.
He should’ve been monitored. For at least a day, hell his entire life, then maybe he’d finally relent in seeing her.
Her shoulders slumped, the anger leaving her as the sadness she tried not to focus on took its place. She wasn’t mad at Trevor. She might as well accept that now.
She was scared that even though Aidan had returned, she’d still lost him.
He’d refused to see her, had left without so much as checking to see if she was okay. When he hadn’t returned to her, she’d tried to barrel into the other room, only to have Britton stop her—the big oaf. While he’d intercepted, Aidan had escaped.
Well, she wouldn’t stand for it.
If he didn’t want her anymore, then he’d have to look her in the eyes and tell her. And it was very possible Aidan no longer wanted anything to do with her. As she’d stormed through the office on her way out to her car, hell-bent on finding him, Trevor had stopped her in her tracks with a final warning, one that still made her cringe.
“You need to be prepared. It may not be the same between you two anymore. The
Drall
may have been damaged.”
Translation: Aidan may no longer feel it and that’s why he was able to leave so easily.
Her response was simply, “He’s my mate,” but Trevor’s “He may no longer be yours” response had felt like a punch to the stomach.
As much as she wanted to deny the possibility, Aidan
had
been at ground zero with the
Splycer
in his hand when the flash had gone off. None of them knew what lingering effect the shocks would have on him, if there were any.
The wheels spun as she turned onto the dirt road that led to Aidan’s cabin, sending a cloud of dust up behind the car. As she crested the hill, she immediately noticed that not one car was parked out front. Everything was eerily silent. She stopped and studied the cabin. No movement inside.
Damn it.
He’d known this would be the first place she’d look. He was hiding, telling her that he wanted nothing to do with her. Well, she’d learned a thing or two from Aidan O’Connell.
When refused, play dirty.
Now she just had to figure out where he’d gone. Maybe Britton’s?
He
had been the one to stop her, so he would’ve given Aidan a heads-up that she was hunting him down, which would make him want to disappear for a while, go somewhere obscure. The. Ass.
He had another think coming if he thought he’d get away that easily. She
was
hunting him down, pitchforks, torches, and all.
Her phone beeped, indicating a text message, and she dug it out of her purse.
An unknown number displayed on the screen and she clicked to read.
The Drove. Ten minutes. Room 712.
Aidan? That hadn’t been his number, but that wasn’t surprising since she still had his cell phone and everything else they’d left on the island at her house from when Rafael had packed it up and shipped it to them. She hadn’t had the time or even the focus to worry about packing. When Trevor said it was time to go, she’d just left.
So this very well could be Aidan using someone else’s phone to reach her. Some of the tension left her. The hotel was one of the swankiest in town. Maybe he was planning a romantic reunion and that was why he left. Thinking that made her feel a lot better.
Then Trevor’s warning came back to haunt her.
She shook her head. No. Aidan wanted to be romantic. She’d think nothing else.
She replied with an “on my way” text and backed the car up and headed back down the road.
It only took a few minutes to make it down the mountain and into the small town. When she pulled up in front of the hotel, she was surprised to find Liam standing out front, arms crossed over his chest. Uncompromising. Angry.
Dread knotted her stomach as she slowly got out of the car and walked toward him. The text hadn’t come from Aidan. She knew that with a certainty. Was Liam the “get lost” messenger?
He’d probably enjoy that role, relieved that his friend had come to his senses. Her steps slowed, not wanting to hear what he might tell her. Not that she’d accept it, but after everything she’d been through this week, having Aidan deny her was not how she pictured the outcome.
More like she’d be in his arms as he kissed her, and she’d watch those eyes widen in shock, then happiness, when she finally asked him to be her mate.
As she reached Liam, he took her hand, turned it palm-up, and pressed a room card into it. She curled her fingers around it as he walked away without a word. He didn’t need words.
She knew exactly what he was doing: giving her Aidan.
“Why?” she asked his retreating back. “After everything you’ve been through, after everything I’ve done, aren’t you worried I’ll reject him?”
Liam paused, then slowly turned. “No woman would do what you did today and still reject her mate. Go…make him whole.”
He went to turn around again but she stopped him by calling his name. When he looked at her, she held the card against her heart and whispered, “Thank you.”
Liam simply nodded.
As she watched him leave, sadness washed over her. He was a man deserving a happily-ever-after with his mate, and unfortunately, he’d never have it. She wished it’d be different for him.
But she’d gladly do as he said—she’d make Aidan whole.
She hurried to the elevator and took it to the seventh floor. Quickly she slipped inside the suite. The shower ran on the other side of the bathroom door. Should she join him?
Man, she wanted to, but she wasn’t sure how Aidan would react to her sudden appearance. If he didn’t want her here, she’d have a hard enough time dealing with his rejection clothed, much less naked. She sat on the couch and waited.
A few minutes later, the shower turned off and he appeared with a white towel wrapped around his hips, his head hidden underneath another one as he rubbed his hair dry. The sight of his wet chest sent arousal flooding through her body.
Aidan stiffened, his head snapping up.
Their gazes connected. Blue flashed in his green eyes, and she breathed a sigh of relief. He was connected to his beast. The instinct still had to be there.
“Wh—” he cleared his throat. “What are you doing here?”
Uncertain of what he would say or do next, she stood on shaky legs. She was there. She’d come to him; he should be more happy, not guarded, distant. “I’m offering myself to my mate.”
He inhaled sharply, surprise widening his eyes, before a controlled expression came to his face. “Why?”
What kind of question was that? “You’re my mate.”
“I’ve spent weeks trying to prove that to you. Why the sudden change?”
Okay, so he wasn’t going to make it easy on her. She deserved it.
“Is it guilt, Jaylin? Do you feel like you have no other options?”
“Of course not.” She held up her hands, pleading that he believe her. “Aidan, I thought I’d lost you. You have no idea what this week has been like for me, how I sat there regretting not bonding to you. How I would take it all back if I could get the chance. How I was a fool for not taking the happiness you were so freely offering me.”
She stepped forward. “I was a
fool
, Aidan.”
He put his hands on his hips, an unyielding expression turning her happy Aidan back to the man he once was, the man who could and would deny her.
“Stupid is more like it. Either way it’s too late.” His voice was flat, hard. “You killed the instinct. I no longer want you.”
Her heart twisted, hearing her worst fears confirmed. All she’d wanted was for Aidan to move on, and now that she couldn’t even think of living life without him, he had. Pride made her want to tilt her chin up and accept what he was saying, but love for this man refused to let her surrender so easily.
With a renewed sense of strength, she crossed her arms over her chest, lifted her chin in the air and said, “Bullshit.”
Aidan blinked. “Excuse me?”
“You want me. You will
always
want me.” She stepped forward, hands on her hips, mimicking his stubborn stance. “And you’re not leaving this room without my mark. Do you understand?”