The Art of Seduction (60 page)

to cover up their manipulations by playing the little girl in need of mascu-
handsome to look upon,
line protection. A famous courtesan of ancient China, Su Shou, used to
and they very fair ladies.
make up her face to look particularly pale and weak. She would also walk
And so, without a thought
in a way that made her seem frail. The great nineteenth-century courtesan
of the chance of more
rigorous imprisonment or

Cora Pearl would literally dress and act like a little girl. Marilyn Monroe
even death, but rather
knew how to give the impression that she depended on a man's strength to
tempted by such
survive. In all of these instances, the women were the ones in control of
opportunities, he did set
himself to the enjoyment of

the dynamic, boosting a man's sense of masculinity in order to ultimately
the two girls with good will
enslave him. To make this most effective, a woman should seem both in
and hearty appetite. And
need of protection and sexually excitable, giving the man his ultimate
these pleasures did continue
without any scandal, for so

fantasy.

fortunate was he in this

The Empress Josephine, wife of Napoleon Bonaparte, won dominance
conquest of his for the space
over her husband early on through a calculated coquetry. Later on, though,
of eight whole months, that
no scandal did ever hap all

she held on to that power through her constant—and not so innocent—use
that time, and no ill,
of tears. Seeing someone cry usually has an immediate effect on our emo-
292
•
The Art of Seduction
inconvenience, nor any

tions: we cannot remain neutral. We feel sympathy, and most often will do
surprise or discovery at all.

anything to stop the tears—including things that we normally would not
For indeed the two sisters
do. Weeping is an incredibly potent tactic, but the weeper is not always so
had so good an under-

standing between them and

innocent. There is usually something real behind the tears, but there may
did so generously lend a

also be an element of acting, of playing for effect. (And if the target senses
hand to each other and so
this the tactic is doomed.) Beyond the emotional impact of tears, there is
obligingly play sentinel to

one another, that no ill hap
something seductive about sadness. We want to comfort the other person,
did ever occur. And he
and as Tourvel discovered, that desire quickly turns into love. Affecting sad
swore to me, being my very
ness, even crying sometimes, has great strategic value, even for a man. It is a
intimate friend as he was,

that never in his days of
skill you can learn. The central character of the eighteenth-century French
greatest liberty had he
novel
Marianne,
by Marivaux, would think of something sad in her past to
enjoyed so excellent
make herself cry or look sad in the present.
entertainment or felt keener

Use tears sparingly, and save them for the right moment. Perhaps this
ardor or better appetite for

it than in the said

might be a time when the target seems suspicious of your motives, or when
prison
—
which truly was a
you are worrying about having no effect on him or her. Tears are a sure
right good prison for him,
barometer of how deeply the other person is falling for you. If they seem
albeit folk say no prison

can be good. And this
annoyed, or resist the bait, your case is probably hopeless.
happy time did continue for

In social and political situations, seeming too ambitious, or too con
the space of eight months,
trolled, will make people fear you; it is crucial to show your soft side. The
till the truce was made

betwixt the Emperor and

display of a single weakness will hide a multitude of manipulations. Emo
Henri II., King of France,
tion or even tears will work here too. Most seductive of all is playing the
whereby all prisoners did

victim. For his first speech in Parliament, Benjamin Disraeli prepared an
leave their dungeons and

were released. He sware
elaborate oration, but when he delivered it the opposition yelled and
that never was he more
laughed so loudly that hardly any of it could be heard. He plowed ahead
grieved than at quitting
and gave the whole speech, but by the time he sat down he felt he had
this good prison of his, but
failed miserably. Much to his amazement, his colleagues told him the
was exceeding sorry to

leave these fair maids, with
speech was a marvelous success. It would have been a failure if he had com
whom he was in such high
plained or given up; but by going ahead as he did, he positioned himself as
favor, and who did express
the victim of a cruel and unreasonable faction. Almost everyone sympa
all possible regrets at his
departing.

thized with him now, which would serve him well in the future. Attacking your mean-spirited opponents can make you seem ugly as well; instead,

— S E I G N E U R D E BRANTÔME,

LIVES OF FAIR & GALLANT

soak up their blows, and play the victim. The public will rally to your side,
LADIES,
TRANSLATED BY A. R.

in an emotional response that will lay the groundwork for a grand political

seduction.

Symbol: The Blemish. A beautiful face is a delight to look at, but
if it is too perfect it leaves us cold, and even slightly intimidated.
It is the little mole, the beauty mark, that makes the face

human and lovable. So do not conceal all of your

blemishes. You need them to soften your

features and elicit tender

feelings.

Disarm Through Strategic Weakness and Vulnerability • 293

Reversal

Timing is everything in seduction; you should always look for signs that the target is falling under your spell. A person falling in love tends to ignore the other person's weaknesses, or to see them as endearing. An unseduced, rational person, on the other hand, may find bashfulness or emotional outbursts pathetic. There are also certain weaknesses that have no seductive value, no matter how in love the target may be.

The great seventeenth-century courtesan Ninon de l'Enclos liked men with a soft side. But sometimes a man would go too far, complaining that she did not love him enough, that she was too fickle and independent, that he was being mistreated and wronged. For Ninon, such behavior would break the spell, and she would quickly end the relationship. Complaining, whining, neediness, and actively appealing for sympathy will appear to your targets not as charming weaknesses but as manipulative attempts at a kind of negative power. So when you play the victim, do it subtly, without overadvertising it. The only weaknesses worth playing up are the ones that will make you seem lovable. All others should be repressed and eradicated at all costs.

Confuse Desire and Reality—

The Perfect Illusion

To

compensate for the difficulties in their

lives, people spend a lot of their time daydreaming, imag-

ining a future full of adventure, success, and romance. If you can
create the illusion that through you they can live out their

dreams, you will have them at your mercy. It is im-

portant to start slowly, gaining their trust,

and gradually constructing the fantasy

that matches their desires. Aim at

secret wishes that have been thwarted

or repressed, stirring up uncontrollable

emotions, clouding their powers of reason. The

perfect illusion is one that does not depart too much from

reality, but has a touch of the unreal to it, like a waking dream,
head the seduced to a point of confusion in which they can

no longer tell the difference between illusion

and reality.

Fantasy in the Flesh

In 1964, a twenty-year-old Frenchman named Bernard Bouriscout arrived in Beijing, China, to work as an accountant in the French embassy. His first weeks there were not what he had expected. Bouriscout had grown up in the French provinces, dreaming of travel and adventure. When he had been assigned to come to China, images of the Forbidden City, and of the gambling dens of Macao, had danced in his mind. But this
Lovers and madmen have
was Communist China, and contact between Westerners and Chinese was
such seething brains, \ Such
almost impossible at the time. Bouriscout had to socialize with the other
shaping fantasies, that
Europeans stationed in the city, and what a boring and cliquish lot they
apprehend \ More than cool
reason ever comprehends.

were. He grew lonely, regretted taking the assignment, and began making plans to leave.

— W I L L I A M SHAKESPEARE,

A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S

Then, at a Christmas party that year, Bouriscout's eyes were drawn to a
DREAM

young Chinese man in a corner of the room. He had never seen anyone Chinese at any of these affairs. The man was intriguing: he was slender and short, a bit reserved, but he had an attractive presence. Bouriscout went up
He was not a sex person.
and introduced himself. The man, Shi Pei Pu, proved to be a writer of
He was like . . . somebody
Chinese-opera librettos who also taught Chinese to members of the
who had come down from
the clouds. He was not

French embassy. Aged twenty-six, he spoke perfect French. Everything
human. You could not say
about him fascinated Bouriscout; his voice was like music, soft and whis-
he was a man friend or a
pery, and he left you wanting to know more about him. Bouriscout, al-
woman friend; he was
somebody different

though usually shy, insisted on exchanging telephone numbers. Perhaps Pei
anyway. .
. .
You feel he
Pu could be his Chinese tutor.

was only a friend who was

They met a few days later in a restaurant. Bouriscout was the only
coming from another planet
and so nice also, so

Westerner there—at last a taste of something real and exotic. Pei Pu, it
overwhelming and
turned out, had been a well-known actor in Chinese operas and came from
separated from the life of
a family with connections to the former ruling dynasty. Now he wrote
the ground.
operas about the workers, but he said this with a look of irony They began —BERNARD BOURISCOUT, IN

to meet regularly, Pei Pu showing Bouriscout the sights of Beijing. Bouris-JOYCE WADLER,
LIAISON

cout loved his stories—Pei Pu talked slowly, and every historical detail seemed to come alive as he spoke, his hands moving to embellish his words. This, he might say, is where the last Ming emperor hung himself, pointing
Romance had again come
her way personified by a

to the spot and telling the story at the same time. Or, the cook in the
handsome young German
restaurant we just ate in once served in the palace of the last emperor, and
officer, Lieutenant Konrad
then another magnificent tale would follow. Pei Pu also talked of life in the
Friedrich, who called upon
her at Neuilly to ask her

Beijing Opera, where men often played women's parts, and sometimes be-
help. He wanted Pauline
came famous for it.

[
Bonaparte
]
to use her

291

298 • The Art of Seduction

influence with Napoleon in

The two men became friends. Chinese contact with foreigners was re
connection with providing
stricted, but they managed to find ways to meet. One evening Bouriscout
for the needs of the French

tagged along when Pei Pu visited the home of a French official to tutor the
troops in the Papal States.

He made an instantaneous

children. He listened as Pei Pu told them "The Story of the Butterfly," a
impression on the princess,

tale from the Chinese opera: a young girl yearns to attend an imperial
who escorted him around

school, but girls are not accepted there. She disguises herself as a boy, passes
her garden until they

arrived at the rockery.

the exams, and enters the school. A fellow student falls in love with her,
There she stopped and,

and she is attracted to him, so she tells him that she is actually a girl. Like
looking into the young

most of these tales, the story ends tragically. Pei Pu told it with unusual
man's eyes mysteriously,

emotion; in fact he had played the role of the girl in the opera.

commanded him to return

to this same spot at the

A few nights later, as they were walking before the gates of the Forbid
same hour next day when
den City, Pei Pu returned to "The Story of the Butterfly" "Look at my
she might have some good

hands," he said, "Look at my face. That story of the butterfly, it is my story
news for him. The young

officer bowed and took his

too." In his slow, dramatic delivery he explained that his mother's first two
leave. . . . In his memoirs

children had been girls. Sons were far more important in China; if the third
he revealed in detail what

child was a girl, the father would have to take a second wife. The third child
took place after the first

meeting with Pauline: •

came: another girl. But the mother was too frightened to reveal the truth,

"At the hour agreed on I

and made an agreement with the midwife: they would say that the child
again proceeded to Neuilly,

was a boy, and it would be raised as such. This third child was Pei Pu.
made my way to the

Over the years, Pei Pu had had to go to extreme lengths to disguise her
appointed spot in the

garden and stood waiting

sex. She never used public bathrooms, plucked her hairline to look as if she
at the rockery. I had not

were balding, on and on. Bouriscout was enthralled by the story, and also
been there very long when

relieved, for like the boy in the butterfly tale, deep down he felt attracted to
a lady made her

appearance, greeted me

Pei Pu. Now everything made sense—the small hands, the high-pitched
pleasantly and led me
voice, the delicate neck. He had fallen in love with her, and, it seemed, the
through a side door into the

feelings were reciprocated.

interior of the rockery

where there were several

Pei Pu started visiting Bouriscout's apartment, and soon they were

rooms and galleries and in

sleeping together. She continued to dress as a man, even in his apartment,
one splendid salon a

but women in China wore men's clothes anyway, and Pei Pu acted more
luxurious-looking bath.

like a woman than any of the Chinese women he had seen. In bed, she had
The adventure was

beginning to strike me as

a shyness and a way of directing his hands that was both exciting and femi
very romantic, almost like
nine. She made everything romantic and heightened. When he was away
a fairy tale, and just as I
from her, her every word and gesture resonated in his mind. What made
was wondering what the

outcome might be a woman

the affair all the more exciting was the fact that they had to keep it secret.
in a robe of the sheerest

In December of 1965, Bouriscout left Beijing and returned to Paris. He
cambric entered by a side

traveled, had other affairs, but his thoughts kept returning to Pei Pu. The
door, came up to me, and

smilingly asked how I liked

Cultural Revolution broke out in China, and he lost contact with her. Be
being there. I at once
fore he had left, she had told him she was pregnant with their child. He had
recognized Napoleon's

no idea whether the baby had been born. His obsession with her grew too
beautiful sister, whose

strong, and in 1969 he finagled another government job in Beijing.

perfect figure was clearly

outlined by every

Contact with foreigners was now even more discouraged than on his

movement of her robe. She

first visit, but he managed to track Pei Pu down. She told him she had
held out her hand for me to

borne a son, in 1966, but he had looked like Bouriscout, and given the
kiss and told me to sit

down on the couch beside

growing hatred of foreigners in China, and the need to keep the secret of
her. On this occasion I

her sex, she had him sent him away to an isolated region near Russia. It was
certainly was not the

so cold there—perhaps he was dead. She showed Bouriscout photographs
Confuse Desire and Reality
—
The Perfect Illusion • 299

of the boy, and he did see some resemblance. Over the next few weeks they
seducer. . . . After an
managed to meet here and there, and then Bouriscout had an idea: he sym-
interval Pauline pulled a
pathized with the Cultural Revolution, and he wanted to get around the
hell rope and ordered the
woman who answered to

prohibitions that were preventing him from seeing Pei Pu, so he offered to
prepare a hath which she
do some spying. The offer was passed along to the right people, and soon
asked me to share.
Bouriscout was stealing documents for the Communists. The son, named
Wearing bathgowns of the

finest linen we remained

Bertrand, was recalled to Beijing, and Bouriscout finally met him. Now a
for nearly an hour in the
threefold adventure filled Bouriscout's life: the alluring Pei Pu, the thrill of
crystal-clear bluish water.
being a spy, and the illicit child, whom he wanted to bring back to France.
Then we had a grand