The Arrangement Anthology (73 page)

I’m so bent out of shape and such an emotional mess that I could totally go all ninja on her ass. The thing is, I think Black would kill me and stuff my head in her stapler drawer before I could throw a punch. Actually having mad skills isn’t anything like the cartoonish self-defensive stuff I know, which is comprised of two things: falling to the floor and screaming. Crap like that doesn’t help when your boss cuts off your underwear in the middle of her office.

Black walks over to her closet and pulls out a
dark garment bag. She glances up at me. “I’m taking this out of your check.” She holds it out for me. I step towards her like it’s totally normal to walk around in heels, thigh highs, and a bra. It doesn’t matter that my snatch patch isn’t covered. At least it shouldn’t, not by now, not if I was doing what I was supposed to be doing, but since the only client I’ve been with is Sean, it still bothers me.

“Stop sulking and put it on.” She snaps at me again, before sitting on the edge of her desk and folding her arms across her chest.

I take the dress out of the bag and manage to bite my tongue. There’s nothing to it. I pull the clothing off the hanger and slip it on. Apparently I’m taking too long, because Miss Black huffs over and slaps my hands. “Let me do it. Honestly, Avery, I have no idea how you can be so utterly incompetent and so desirable at the same time. It seems like everyone is asking for you lately. I’ve had a hard time selling anyone in your place.”

She yanks on my girls,
making my eyes bug out of my head, shifting them under the dress. She’s horrible. I hope she gets hit by a truck later. I try to focus on what she said instead of what she’s doing to the girls. “In my place? Why, did someone try to book me tonight, besides Mr. Ferro?”

Miss Black runs her hand along
my bra and smooths the fabric. The neckline dips, forming a thin V as it comes across my chest and down to my waist. This is a slut dress. It’s skin tight, too short, and backless.

Her gaze flicks up to mine. “Of course. Every client you’ve had wanted you
, plus some. Your reputation is spreading, which is wonderful. They all want you. I’ve received several calls from clients—new and old—who want to book you at the same time. It’s a full moon or something. I got the rest to accept someone else, but one man insisted on having you and paid for it. I couldn’t tell him no.”

“
You double booked me?” I sound appalled.

Miss Black answers without looking at my face. Her eyes rove my body, looking at the new dress.
“It’s not a big deal, just go by the second room before you leave the city. He said he’d wait for you. I explained that you had a previous obligation.”

My jaw is clicking and I’m pretty sure my head is ready to spin off my shoulders. “
Miss Black, I actually wanted to talk to you.” My boss looks up and I know that I have her full attention. Don’t be timid, Avery. Spit it out. Squaring my shoulders, I say, “I don’t think I can do this anymore. I mean, if tonight wasn’t with Mel, I don’t know what I would have done.”

She spins me around and pulls the dress into p
lace at my shoulders and smooths more of the fabric as she runs her palms over my hips, before swatting my butt. “I told you to lose weight. This is becoming a problem.”

Did she just say that I’m fat? Blinking, I shake my head and stare at her.
“Did you hear me? I don’t want to do this anymore.”

Miss Black steps away from my back and walks around to face me. There’s a pleasant smile on her face, very similar to the one she had when I first met her. “Avery, dear, do you know how much money you’ll make if we continue to book each of these men once a week—once a month
, even? Your weekly pay check will be well into dreamland territory and all you have to do is keep these rich men begging for more. I have no idea how you do it, but they clearly want you.” She folds her arms over her chest while she stares at my cleavage. She pokes at my left boob, like it’s not in the right place.

What just happened? I quit twice and she basically ignored me. “Miss Black—”

Before I can say another word, she steps toward me, close enough to kiss, and presses her finger to my lips. Her voice is a lethal whisper. “If I only knew how you did it, I could show each one of my girls and there’d be more money than any of us ever dreamed, more money than you’d make in a lifetime, Avery. There’s something about you that makes these men crave you and willing to pay any price to have you sate their lust, but somehow you always leave them wanting more. And they want so much more…” Her dark eyes are on my mouth and the moment has moved from weird to utterly uncomfortable. Miss Black’s perfect ruby red lips pull into a smile as her finger slips away.

I stand there frozen, wondering what she means by that. Her long dark lashes are lowered and she remains too close for t
oo long, breathing deeply with her lips parted like she wants to say something else.

The sound of static saves me. Black rolls her eyes and tur
ns back toward her desk. “Mel is here.” Gabe’s voice through the intercom is detached and devoid of emotion.

What? Mel was supposed to be here already. What the hell is Gabe talking about?

A moment later, Mel is at the door. “Hey, Miss Black.” She bounds into the room with a fake smile to hide her nerves. Mel isn’t afraid of anyone, but she’s fearful of Black. Mel’s wearing a flirty red dress similar to the one I had on before my shameful scolding. She spins and it floats up in a circle, showing off her lacy thigh highs and new panties. “What do you think?”

“It’s perfect, Mel
.”

My jaw drops and I make a face. “What! That’s just like the dress I had on!”

“Yes, dear, but Mel wearing a cute dress is ironic, while on you, it’s just cute and cute doesn’t sell.”

Mel looks over at me and whistles. “Hot damn, Avery. That dress is tight. I like how the little bits of purple lace peak out from
your bra. That is one hot look.”

I want to strangle her. Miss Black smiles. “It appears that one of Avery’s talents is teasing, so she should play up the anticipation, don’t you think?”

“Fuck, yeah. I’d do you looking like that.” Mel laughs with Black as they both head over to the table outside her office. The conversation continues, but the words Sean said come back to me. He thinks she has a thing for me, but I don’t get that vibe from her. Mel teases, that’s all. She wasn’t serious.

“So, who
are we doing?” Mel asks, as Black measures her. She isn’t asked to strip. I guess the hands on treatment is just for me. WTH?

“Mr. Ferro.” Miss Black says calmly as she pulls out the papers and slides them towards us on the desk.

Mel nearly chokes, but recovers quickly and doesn’t look up at me. She groans, like she doesn’t want to go, and leans back in her chair. “He’s one messed up piece of work, Miss Black.”

“I realize that, but he requested both of you and said he was impressed with your previous services. The fee was quite high, but he paid it, so maybe you won’t mind so much.” She winks at Mel and slips a piece of paper toward her.

Mel is in the middle of a sentence by the time she picks up the paper. “No amount of money could make me want to go back to that guy’s… Holy shit. Are you for real?” Mel can act, that’s for sure. She looks completely surprised.

Black smiles serenely.
“Yes, so let him do whatever he wants.”

“Done,” Mel sits up and grabs a pen. “Where do I sign?” Miss Black points and Mel
scribbles her name.

“These are for next week. More of the regular.” Black hands the papers to Mel and she signs up for a few more
appointments. “And Miss Stanz, here are your clients.” She pushes a paper toward me. They’re names, not contracts, because I no longer get to agree to anything. I go where she tells me, and do whatever the guy wants. I don’t take the paper.

Taking a deep breath, I stiffen and stand my ground.
“I was serious, Miss Black. I can’t do this anymore. Mr. Ferro is my last client.” Suddenly, I have no idea what to do with my hands so I fold them over my chest.

Miss Black smiles at me.
She’s seated at the table across from Mel, with her long lean legs crossed at the knee with one foot bobbing up and down. She taps the pen once on the paper. “I see. And there’s nothing I can do to change your mind?”

“No.”

“No amount of money will make it more enticing for you to stay?” Mel watches the exchange without comment, but her head turns side to side like a dog watching a tennis ball.

Fear prickles my skin, but my voice is firm.
“It’s not about money. I can’t do it anymore. I’m not cut out for this.”

Miss Black grins tightly before looking over at Mel. “Well, we can’t make you stay, Miss
Stanz. Although we strongly encourage it.” There’s something menacing in her tone. It completely contradicts the light smile on her lips.

I glance at Mel, but she seems just as surprised as I am. Stepping over to Black, I
ask, “What are you saying?”

Miss Black stands so we’re eye to eye. Her gaze is intimidating, but I don’t look away and I won’t back up.
When Black speaks, she’s so close that her minty breath washes over my face. “That your life will be better if you work here and worse if you choose to leave.” Her mouth hugs each word tightly, like it’s a simple statement and nothing more. A smile spreads across her face that instantly sends a jolt of ice down my spine.

Gabe told me to get out of here as fast as I can. I’m out of options. She’s not letting
me quit and talking is getting me nowhere. I wish I could say something else, but nothing comes to mind. The only way out is to agree with her, so that’s what I do. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe more money will make it more tolerable.” My gaze drops to the floor and Miss Black beams at me, and touches my shoulder lightly.

“Excellent
. I knew I could count on you, Avery. We are going to be very rich women when this is over. Just wait. Your dream of being a marriage therapist will seem trite in comparison.”

Her words are like barbs. Each one is shot with
precision directly into me. Her intention is to belittle my dreams and show me that I can have everything if I stay with her. Black knows she’s losing me, that I don’t want to be here anymore, so she’s throwing logic in my face. It’s difficult to ignore her when she makes so much sense. I’ve worked my ass off for my degree. It’s a piece of paper that will allow me to get another piece of paper that will allow me to finally become what I always wanted to be. When I was younger, I could see myself in a big old house with a little office around on the side. There was a husband and a baby inside. They were dreams and I was content with the thought of middle class life, and trying to get by like everyone else.

But what she just said, the things she is offering, make those dreams seem so
fragile. I’ve been walking on cracking ice for a while now, and it’s been growing thinner and thinner. One misstep will destroy everything. Somehow the certainties that I once held have all been snatched away. One rumor, one wrong place at the wrong time, or one accusation could ruin me and I’d be worse off than I am now. Alone, I’d have no way to support myself. Every issue of my life could stabilize if I say yes and continue to work here. I could have my own fortune, and I wouldn’t be subject to the whims of other people. That’s what Black’s offering and it makes so much sense that it hurts. She knew exactly what to say, where to strike.

For a secon
d, I look at Black. My words are meant to find a soft spot in her armor, a longing for a life she let slip away. “What were your dreams when you were my age? What did you want to be, Miss Black?” My tone implies that there was no way she chose this job, but the look on her face says otherwise.

Stepping towards me, her voice takes on
a caring tone that sounds too motherly to be coming from her mouth. “I dreamt of power, and was willing to do anything necessary to secure my future. You’d be foolish if you don’t do the same. In the end, the only person you can depend on is you. People come and go, they’re born and die. The only constant in your life is you.”

Numbness
spreads through me like poison, lurching from my fingertips to my toes. I can barely move. Black has found something that terrifies me more than small spaces, and this time when an imaginary coffin flashes before my eyes, I’m not trapped in it.

Instead, I’m in a fu
neral home and looking down at Sean.

I’m not normal anymore. At one time I might have been mainstream, but not now. There are too many nightmares that walk about in daylight, and Black just pinpointed my worst fear. I barely survived my parents’ deaths. I couldn’t make it through Sean’s, and yet, everyone must die. It’s a matter of when and how much time we have left. I don’t suppose other people think about death the way I do. Sometimes I imagine the worst thing possible, trying to brace myself for it, so I never feel so off balance again.

The day my parents died was unexpected. There was nothing to brace me, no one to hold me up. At times like that a person finds out how strong they are, and I’ve started to think that I am not weak. I endured it and I can still smile. I lived through tragedy and still breathe. I got to tomorrow and things looked brighter, but Black saying that—suggesting that
one day I’ll be alone again—cut me to the core. She found my weakness.

We leave the building without another word. Gabe has the limo waiting out front, so Mel and I slip inside and
get out of the chilly night air. Sighing, I lean my head back against the seat as Gabe drives us in silence.

Mel finally speaks, “Don’t let her get inside your head. That’s what she was trying to do, Avery. Shove her out.”

I wish it were that simple, but Black’s words planted a seed in my mind. The thought is already growing, vining around inside my head like a rampant weed. I don’t want it there, but she spoke the truth. The thought of losing Sean terrifies me. I can’t go back to that life where I was barely glued together. I’m not strong enough to live through it again. “I know, but she knew what she was doing and honed in on something that scares me more than anything. The stupid thing is that I had no idea it was there. I mean, I always said my biggest fear was being trapped inside a closet or something. She blindsided me, that’s all, and it would have been easier to blow her off if it wasn’t the truth.”

“People weave the truth into lies all the time, Avery. It’s the best way to bring
someone down, and that’s what Black’s trying to do to you.” Mel glances up at Gabe. Her eyes shift away from him, like maybe she shouldn’t be saying these things in front of him.

“Gabe won’t repeat anything. Say whatever you’re thinking.” I slouch back in the seat
, trying to keep my butt from peeking out from under my way-too-short dress.

Gabe glances back at us and nods once. “I don’t hear
nothin’.” He stares ahead at the traffic.

“First of all, I feel guilty. I had no idea things were going to turn out like this. I’m sorry, Avery. I really am. And no matter what she says, no matter what she tells you, don’t wade deeper into this shit than you already are. You’ll never get out, and that’s what she wants. I have no idea why, but Black wants you. It’s personal. If you give in and stay, you’ll never get out.”

I’m staring at the floor while she speaks. Mel has a good point, and I want to tell her she’s right so that she’ll stop worrying about me. “Mel, I’m not going back after tonight. This is the last time.”

“Avery,” there’s a warning tone in
her voice, “You can’t blow off Black like that.”

Glancing at her out of the corner of my eye, I ask,
“Then how do I quit, Mel?”

“I don’t know. Right now you have too many clients asking for you.
She knows how much you’re worth and what it means to lose you. You’re irreplaceable in her head. She said as much tonight.” I give her a weird look because I didn’t think she heard that part of our conversation. Mel wasn’t there for most of it. She rolls her eyes and huffs. “I was listening outside the door, okay? I told you that I was at Black’s and I was. I just wasn’t in her office yet.”

“What were you doing?” By the sound of it, Mel was doing something she shouldn’t have been.

She shakes her head. “Nothing that you need to know about. You’re in enough trouble, but let’s just say I overheard some of the things she said to you in private, all right, and I don’t like this Avery.” Mel shivers and rubs her hands over her arms. “Something’s not right, not anymore. I mean, getting that many requests is strange. Your price goes sky high and they back off or leave because they can’t afford you. Where the hell are these guys getting their money? You should be unattainable by now.”

“
Maybe Black made the whole thing up and the only guy asking for me over and over again is Sean.”

She nods and touches her finger to her lips, unblinking. “
Black’s never said that to me, but then again, I haven’t tried to leave.”

For a second
, I’m afraid that she still feels guilty. I can’t read her when she’s so still and quiet. “There’s no way you could have known.”

She nods again, slowly bobbing her head up and down, still dazed.
Gabe drops us off at the front of the hotel and drives away. Mel and I walk across the lobby without a word. There are so many eyes on me, sizing me up, and wondering what kind of slut I am to be wearing this dress. It makes my pulse race faster, but I manage to hold onto my confident stance and keep my head held high. This is a game, this façade isn’t who I am, it’s an illusion.

Mel and I ride the elevator to
Sean’s floor before we step off and head down the hall. That’s when a gush of words erupts from Mel’s mouth. “I was wrong, so goddamn wrong to pull you into this. I said she wasn’t a pimp, that she didn’t do shit like this, and here she is doing it. Avery, I swear to God—”

Mel’s voice is strained and her eyes have that vacant stare that so often accompanies guilt. This isn’t her fault, no matter what happens, I’ll never blame her.
I stop abruptly, grab Mel’s shoulders and look her in the eye. “There is no way you knew that Black was like this. I believe you. You’re not responsible for whatever happens next. I’m the one who agreed to come, I’m the one who signed up to be this, and I’m the one who will have to deal with the consequences. It’s not your fault Mel.”

Her gaze falls to the side, like she can’t look me in the eye, which is weird for Mel. “I took you there and said it was safe. I
screwed up, Avery.” She’s mad at herself and upset for me. There’s no telling what will happen or how hard it will be to defy Black, but no matter what happens, it’s not her fault. This was my doing, not hers.

“Mel, that night you asked me to go and meet your boss, I could have said no, and I
didn’t. After I found out what the job was, I could have said no. I had the opportunity to say no and walk away so many times. The fact is, I took the job and nothing you said made me do it. Everything will be fine. Don’t worry about it.” That’s a big fat lie. I have no idea how everything will work out. It feels like I have a pack of pissed off people snarling and circling. Black can lunge at me with her fangs bared at any time. With my luck, it’ll be tomorrow.

Sean’s voice comes from over my shoulder. “Don’t worry about what?”