The Apothecary's Daughter (15 page)

“You will have to ask your uncle. But it seems to me that piece has been there for several years. I have never worn it. I really do not know
what would possess him to buy such a thing, though I have never had
the heart to tell him so.”

Her aunt took her by the arms, concern deep in the lines of her
face. “What is it, Lillian? Why do you want to know?”

It was on the tip of her tongue to say, It was my mother’s. But she
bit the words back. Should she tell her aunt if her uncle had never done
so? Had he his reasons? Lilly swallowed. “It is an unusual piece, to be
sure. You are right. I shall ask Uncle about it as you suggest.”

“But-“

“Forgive me. I had better hurry or I shall never dress for dinner
in time.”

“Very well, my dear.”

But she felt her aunt’s concern follow her from the dressing room.

As they sat at the dining table that evening, each spooning spring
soup in polite, silent sips, her aunt broached the subject.

“My dear. Lillian would like to ask you about a necklace in the
chest.”

“Oh?”

“The unusual black piece with the onyx pendant?”

Her uncle’s face looked disturbed, his eyes stared at the tablecloth,
unseeing. Or was she imagining this?

“I am afraid I do not have your every bauble memorized, my
dear.”

“Of course not. But you would remember this piece. Black filigree,
octagonal pendant? I believe you said you purchased it at auction
several years ago.”

“Did I?” He set down his spoon with a clatter and leaned back
heavily against the chair. “Let us finish our meal in peace then you
may show me the article in question. All right?”

Her aunt looked mildly stunned. “Yes, of course.”

After dinner the Elliotts disappeared into her aunt’s room, and
Lilly retreated to her own, waiting anxiously. She found herself thinking back to the day her mother had disappeared. Of coming home to find
her father pacing and Charlie hiding behind the draperies. She had
gone into the bedchamber and begun searching through her mother’s
drawers and wardrobe, looking for a letter or for some clue as to why
she had left and where she had gone. Lilly feared she knew the reason,
at least in part. Even now, she couldn’t quite dispel the guilt she felt,
the awful notion that their argument had been the cause.

During her long ago search, Lilly had quickly surmised her mother
had taken her jewelry and better dresses. Then she had realized the
map was gone. The world map she and her mother had pored over
on rainy afternoons the rectangle of thick creased paper the color
of a tea stain. The print dominated by two spheres the eastern Old
World. The western New. As a girl, Lilly could hardly believe the
tiny rabbit-shaped island was England, its ears Scotland. How small
her world was compared to the rest of the world. Mother had agreed,
and together they dreamt for hours, their fingers tracing latitude lines,
underscoring names of faraway places the Canary Islands, Trinidad,
Tobago, the Southern Icy Ocean and imagining aloud what each
might be like. Her mother seemed to know how long a sea journey
might take to Terra Australis, where convicts were transported, or to
the Cape of Africa, or to South America’s Horn.

When she had left, Rosamond Haswell had taken the well-worn
map with her. Where had it taken her? Was she even now using it to
chart her course?

Lilly was pacing her room half an hour later when the housemaid
knocked and asked her to join Mr. Elliott in the library. Lilly went
down directly.

Her uncle stood alone, one hand on the fireplace mantel. “Come
in, my dear. Be seated.”

She sat in one of the chairs at the library table, hands clasped. An
oil lamp glowed upon the table’s gleaming mahogany surface.

He stepped quietly toward her, unfurling his palm, and the black
necklace uncoiled from his hand. He laid it on the table between
them.

He sighed, his eyes on the piece. “In all honesty, I had forgotten
it was there or at least put it from my mind.”

She swallowed and whispered, “It was my mother’s, was it not?”

He looked at her, sadness heavy in his hound dog eyes. “Yes, it
was. Though I am surprised you remember it so clearly. Ah, I forget.
Your infallible memory.”

She hung her head. “Not infallible…”

“I meant no censure. I only wish my memory were half so keen.”
He sat down in the chair opposite and sighed again. “Your aunt did
not know it was your mother’s. I never told her before tonight.”

While Lilly was relieved at her aunt’s exoneration, confusion still
plagued her. “Why?”

“Your mother did not wish for Ruth to know.”

“I … I don’t understand. What control would she have over an
auction? “

“It was not a public auction, although I allowed Ruth to believe
it so. Your mother came to see me privately.”

“When?”

“Must be nearly four years ago now. I did not know then that
she had left all of you. I arrogantly assumed your father had fallen on
difficult times. Difficult indeed for her to be willing to come to me,
to ask for money.”

Lilly found it hard to breathe.

“She said she would rather offer the piece to me than some stranger,
since I ought to value it more highly. I supposed she wanted to keep it
in the family. Honorable enough, though it did strike me as cheeky to
ask for money for something that our parents had given her.”

“What else did she say? Where was she living?”

“As I said, I foolishly assumed she had merely come from Wiltshire
seeking funds. I did not ask questions. Though I am afraid I said a
few cruel things.”

“Cruel?”

“About your father not being able to support her how we had all
been right in advising her not to marry him. I am ashamed to think
of what I said then.”

“I wonder if she was living in London or passing through …
Was she alone?”

“Yes.”

“And she asked you not to tell Aunt? “

“She and Ruth had been girlhood friends. I imagine it embarrassed
her to think of Ruth knowing.”

“Or perhaps she realized Aunt would ask more questions than
you did. Questions she did not wish to answer.”

“Perhaps.”

“Did she ask for money on other occasions as well?”

He hesitated only a second. “No, my dear. That was the only
money she ever asked for. I suppose she had nothing else of value and
was too proud to ask for a handout.”

Lilly shook her head, imagining the awkward scene between
estranged brother and sister.

“I am sorry, Lillian. I never intended to deceive you. It is only that
I knew it would upset you. Tell me you understand.”

“I do.” She stood slowly to her feet. “Does Aunt? Or is she angry
with you?”

He shrugged. “Disappointed, perhaps.”

Lilly walked to the window on wobbly legs. Outside on the street,
lamplight gleamed on the rain-wet cobbles.

“Will you be all right?” he asked.

“Of course. Thank you for telling me.”

Her uncle rose as well. “You are welcome to the necklace, Lillian.
I am certain your mother would want you to have it.”

Lilly was not so sure. Did anyone really know what her mother
wanted? “Let us leave it locked away. For now.”

In the morning, her aunt came to her room while Lilly was still in
her dressing gown. She took Lilly’s strong hands in her own delicate
ones.

“My dear, I am sorry. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling.”

“I don’t know how to feel about it.”

She squeezed her hands. “How can I help?”

Lilly took a deep breath. “By telling me everything you know.”

Ruth Elliott hesitated. “Your mother and I confided a great deal
to one another as girls, but I know very little about what happened
after she married your father.”

“And before?”

“Well, I don’t think you … I don’t think anyone enjoys hearing
a parent’s romantic history that is, history not involving the other
parent.”

“Tell me anyway.” Lilly seated herself on the made bed and patted the nearby chair.

Her aunt sat, though she looked far from comfortable. “Your
mother fancied herself in love with a man before she met your father.
Did she ever tell you?”

Lilly shook her head, and her aunt continued. “A very dashing
man. A naval officer. And she believed he planned to marry her.”

“What was his name?”

Ruth Elliott twisted her rings. “I suppose it can do no harm. A
Captain Ernest Quincy. But everyone called him Quinn.”

The name meant nothing to Lilly.

“She used to tell me that Quinn planned to have ships of his own
one day and travel far and wide. And that he promised to take her
with him.”

Lilly nodded thoughtfully. She could understand how such a
man and such an offer might appeal to her mother. Had she not
spent hours dreaming over her prized world map?

“Rosamond was so happy in those days,” Ruth continued. “Then,
without warning, Quinn’s betrothal was announced in the Times. He
had engaged himself to Daisy Wolcott, a much better match, I suppose,
as her father was quite wealthy. Rosamond was devastated.

“But then, not a fortnight later, she told me she had met another
man and that this Charles Haswell was everything Quinn was not.
Evidently, he thought Rosamond the most desirable and perfect creature ever to live. Balm to her wounded soul, no doubt. But as you know by now, the family thought Charles not at all suitable. No wealth. No
family to speak of No connections.” She glanced at Lilly with sorrowful eyes. “I am sorry, but there it is.” She took a deep breath. “Of
course, Rosamond saw none of this. She argued that he would soon
have a good income and good prospects. But more than this, she knew
your father would take her from London, the scene of her disgrace, as
she saw it, and I think this was his greatest attraction.

“He proposed in a matter of days, and Rosamond accepted. We
all tried to dissuade her from such a course. Had your grandfather
lived, he would never have allowed it, but he had already passed on
by then. Rosamond begged Jonathan to purchase a special license so
that she and Charles might marry as soon as possible. In the end, she
married two days before Quinn’s own wedding, with only her mother,
Jonathan, and I in attendance. I think Rosamond spent a great deal of
time imagining Quinn’s remorse at discovering her wed to another.
Several times during the wedding, I saw her glance toward the side
door, as if she was sure Quinn would burst through it and object at
any moment.”

Ruth Elliott shook her head ruefully. “Your uncle determined
that no one of our acquaintance should learn of your father’s trade.
When asked, we spoke in general terms of his `holdings’ somewhere in
Wiltshire. After the wedding, the two departed almost immediately.
Much to Rosamond’s-and everyone’s relief, I am sorry to say.”

Her aunt stopped speaking, and the room felt suddenly too silent.
The clock above the mantel ticked, a door closed somewhere belowstairs, the faint sounds of hooves and passing carriages bled through
the outside walls.

Lilly said, “I can see why you hesitated to tell me. It is not a romantic story, is it? I wonder if my poor father had any idea.”

“I do not know, my dear.”

Lilly rose, agitated, as all the new details struggled to fit themselves
into the old and erroneous impressions in her mind. “So … did this
Quinn ever buy his ships and sail away?”

Ruth remained seated. “Not that I know of. He is still married to
the former Miss Wolcott. Though it does not appear to be a happy marriage. I see Daisy now and again, and she is almost always alone.
The gossips claim, and I am among them now, I suppose, that he has
kept a string of mistresses.”

“You don’t think Mother-?”

Aunt Elliott shifted, glanced at her, then away. “As far as I know,
their connection was severed more than twenty years ago.” She
paused. “But I confess, when we received your father’s letter telling us
Rosamond had left him, I wasn’t as surprised as I might have been,
had I not known about Quinn. I had hoped Rosamond would be
happy with your father. But I never really believed she would be.” She
sighed. “I am afraid I don’t know any more, my dear. I have no idea
where she went or where she is now.”

Lilly stared out the second-floor window, at the passing traffic and
the trees of Hyde Park beyond. “I have always imagined her sailing
the high seas, or on a grand adventure somewhere.”

“Have you indeed? “

Lilly turned and glimpsed some unfamiliar, dark emotion in her
aunt’s countenance.

“Then your imagination is far more generous than mine.”

But if the young are never tired of erring in conduct,
neither are the older in erring of judgment.

FANNY BURNEY, CECILIA, 1782