The American Way of Death Revisited (43 page)

BOOK: The American Way of Death Revisited
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The option of caring for your own dead, if it takes hold, will mark a break with the trend towards ever-more-costly and -mechanically impersonal journeys to the grave. Which direction will the American public choose? On the one hand, there can be a return to funerals in the true American tradition, where friends and family do everything necessary without the intervention of so-called professionals; or, on the other, a further abdication of personal responsibility, where we accept the best and most costly merchandise the trade has to offer, not excluding absurdities such as Batesville’s Burping Casket.
*

On the East Coast, after months of persistence by Byron Blanchard of the Boston-based Memorial Society, the Public Health Department conceded, in the summer of 1996, that consumers had a legal right to care for their own dead. A regulation promulgated by the Funeral Board—requiring a funeral director to obtain the disposition permit—had been declared illegal in 1909 but had nonetheless remained on the books.

FAMSA has taken on the daunting task of monitoring funeral laws countrywide. Aware that not everyone will opt to handle all funeral arrangements without a mortician, they stand ready to assume the cause of the consumer’s right to choose meaningful and affordable funerals. At Carlson’s prodding, societies are doing more price surveys and checking for FTC compliance. The FAMSA office serves as a clearinghouse for consumer complaints and maintains a Web site with a wide range of funeral information: www.funerals.org/famsa.

That spirit of social activism has attracted new resources. Lamar Hankins, a Texas lawyer with a history of contributing pro bono time to social issues, is typical. He is working to build an endowment for a legal fund to assist consumers—those with few other options, or residents of states where issues have national implications. Individual societies—many of which had been somnolent for the last decade—are responding with enthusiasm to the renewed spirit of activism, and new societies are emerging.

By 1997—with more and more commercial cremation businesses calling themselves “Societies”—the nonprofit societies felt they were undergoing an identity crisis. The “Ohio Cremation and Memorial Society,” for example, was attracting customers who thought it represented the well-respected nonprofit consumer group. As a result, FAMSA is encouraging member societies to change their names to “Funeral Consumer Information Society of———.”

The name change also reflects a broader base of interest. Those who join are not just those choosing immediate burial or cremation with a memorial service; even those planning a funeral with the casket present are avoiding funeral excess by seeking society help. Larry Burkett, founder of Christian Financial Concepts, admonishes his following to live without debt; that includes funeral debt. On a weekly show syndicated to more than six hundred stations, Burkett—a member of the Atlanta, Georgia, society—has commended
the societies. After a half-hour interview with Carlson in January 1997, the FAMSA phones were flooded with inquiries about how to contact a local society.

Men and women who support legislative changes and see the need for an ongoing watch of the funeral industry will want to get involved in society activities. For those seeking alternatives to a costly funeral, a onetime lifetime membership in one of the nonprofit societies will offer up-to-date local price information.

What is to be done if at the time of crisis you are unable to reach a memorial or funeral society? Send a friend to two or more mortuaries to obtain their general price lists and casket prices. Ask for the cost of direct cremation, including transportation costs and crematory fees. Likewise, for the cost of immediate burial. Pay no money in advance. If death has not yet occurred and you wish to pay in installments, do so by setting up a Totten Trust, naming yourself or a relative or close friend as beneficiary. Remember, above all, that many funeral homes have a “no-walk” policy, which means simply that if and when you start to walk out, the price will come down, down, down until a level acceptable to you is reached.

*
So-called protective caskets, having been heavily merchandised over the years, now outsell all other burial receptacles combined. Ask a funeral director why someone already dead will need protection, and he will, if he follows the manufacturer’s script, reply with severity, “To prevent alien and foreign objects from reaching your loved one.” There is one Southern mortician who, following his own drummer, has reduced the explanation to: “To keep bugs and critters out.” But as with any lucrative idea that has not been thought through, the casket manufacturers and the undertakers who serve as their exclusive distributors soon had to face up to the consequences. Protective caskets, which command substantially higher prices than those that are “unprotected,” achieve protection by using an impermeable, inexpensive rubber gasket as a sealing device. This causes a buildup of methane gas, a byproduct of the metabolism of anaerobic bacteria, which, thriving in an airless environment, have a high old time with the contents of the sealed casket. Exploding-casket episodes occurred with sufficient frequency to induce Batesville, the acknowledged leader in the field, to design a new line of protective caskets to deal with the crisis. A “permeable” seal is used, which lets the accumulated gases leak—or “burp”—out, to prevent the buildup of gas that causes the lids to blow off (and the appalled relatives to go to court).

Directory of Not-for-Profit Funeral and Memorial Societies

Memorial and funeral planning societies do area price surveys and may have negotiated a discount for members. Request a brochure for affordable funeral options. Most societies are run by volunteers. Consequently, the phone numbers in this directory may change from time to time. If you have difficulty contacting a society, you may call the FAMSA office at 1-800-765-0107. If there is no society nearby, you may join Friends of FAMSA and receive benefits until a new society is launched.

In the United States

Alabama

Call the FAMSA office

Alaska

Anchorage  Cook Inlet Memorial
907-566-3732
   P.O. Box 102414, 99510
 

Arizona

Phoenix Valley Memorial Society
602-929-9659
   P.O. Box 0423, Chandler, 85244-0423
 
Prescott Memorial Society of Prescott
520-778-3000
   P.O. Box 1090, 86302-1090
 
Tucson Memorial Society of Southern Arizona
520-721-0230
   P.O. Box 12661, 85732-2661
 

Arkansas

Fayetteville NW Arkansas Memorial Society
501-443-1404
   P.O. Box 3055, 72702-3055
 

California

Arcata Humboldt Funeral Society
707-822-8599
   P.O. Box 856, 95518
 
Bakersfield Kern Memorial Society
805-854-5689
   P.O. Box 1202, 93302-1202
805-366-7266
Berkeley Bay Area Funeral Society
510-841-6653
   P.O. Box 264, 94701-0284
 
Fresno Valley Memorial Society
 
   P.O. Box 101, 93707-0101
 
Los Angeles Los Angeles Funeral Society
818-683-3545
   P.O. Box 92313, Pasadena, CA 91109-2313
818-683-3752
Modesto Stanislaus Memorial Society
209-521-7690
   P.O. Box 4252, 95352-4252
 
Palo Alto Funeral and Memorial Planning Society
650-321-2109
   P.O. Box 60448, 94306-0448
888-775-5553
Sacramento Sacramento Valley Memorial Society
916-451-4641
   P.O. Box 161688, 95816-1688
 
San Diego San Diego Memorial Society
619-293-0926
   P.O. Box 16336, 92176
 
San Luis Obispo Central Coast Memorial Society
805-543-6133
   P.O. Box 679, 93406-0679
 
Santa Barbara Channel Cities Memorial Society
805-640-0109
   P.O. Box 1778, Ojai, CA 93024-1778
800-520-PLAN
Santa Cruz Funeral and Memorial Society of Monterey Bay
408-426-3308
   P.O. Box 2900, 95063-2900
 
Sebastopol Redwood Funeral Society
707-824-8360
   7735 Bodega Ave., #4, 95473
 
Stockton San Joaquin Memorial Society
209-465-2741
   P.O. Box 4832, 95204-4832
 

Colorado

Denver Rocky Mountain Memorial Society
303-759-2800
4101 E. Hampden Ave., 80222
 

Connecticut

Bridgewater Funeral Consumer Information Society of Connecticut
860-350-4921
   P.O. Box 34, 06752
 

Delaware

Served by Memorial Society of Maryland

District of Columbia

Washington Memorial Society of Metropolitan Washington
202-234-7777
1500 Harvard St. NW, 20009
 

Florida

Cocoa Funeral and Memorial Society of Brevard County
407-453-4109
   P.O. Box 276, 32923-0276
407-636-3363
DeBary Funeral Society of Mid-Florida
904-789-1682
   P.O. Box 392, 32713-0392
407-668-6822
Ft. Myers Funeral and Memorial Society of Southwest Florida
941-743-0109
   P.O. Box 7756, 33911-7756
 
Gainesville Memorial Society of Alachua County
352-378-3432
   P.O. Box 14662, 32604-4662
 
Orlando Memorial and Funeral Society of Greater Orlando
407-677-5009
   P.O. Box 953, Goldenrod, FL 32733-0953
 
Palm Beach Gardens Palm Beach Funeral Society
561-659-4881
   P.O. Box 31982, 33420
 
Pensacola and Fort Walton Beach Funeral and Memorial Society of Pensacola and West Florida
904-477-8431
   7804 Northpointe Blvd., 32514
 
Sarasota Memorial Society of Sarasota
941-953-3740
   P.O. Box 15833, 34277-5833
 
St. Petersburg Suncoast-Tampa Bay Memorial Society
813-898-3294
   719 Arlington Ave. North, 33701
 
Tallahassee Funeral and Memorial Society of Leon County
850-224-2082
   1006 Buena Vista Dr., 32304
 
Tampa Memorial Society of Tampa Bay
 
   45 Katherine Blvd., #307, Palm Harbor, 34684-3648
 

Georgia

Atlanta Memorial Society-of Georgia
404-634-2896
   1911 Cliff Valley Way NE, 30329
800-840-4339
Macon Middle Georgia Chapter
912-477-1691
   4825 Brittany Dr., 31210
 

Hawaii

Honolulu Memorial Society of Hawaii
808-946-6822
   2510 Bingham St., Room A, 96826
 

Idaho

Boise Idaho Memorial Association
208-343-4581
   P.O. Box 1919, 83701-1919
 

Illinois

Chicago Chicago Memorial Association

P.O. Box 2923, 60690-2923

Urbana Champaign County Memorial Society

309 West Green St., 61801

Indiana

Bloomington Bloomington Memorial Society
812-332-3695
   2120 North Fee Lane, 47408
 
Indianapolis Indianapolis Memorial Society
 
   5805 East 56th St., 46226
 
Valparaiso Memorial Society of Northwest Indiana
219-464-3024
   P.O. Box 329, 46384-0329
 

Iowa

Iowa City Memorial Society of Iowa River Valley
319-338-2637
   120 North Dubuque St., 52245
 
For all other areas, call the FAMSA office
 

Kansas

Check Missouri or call the FAMSA office

Kentucky

Louisville Memorial Society of Greater Louisville

P.O. Box 5326, 40255-5326

Louisiana

Baton Rouge Memorial Society of Greater Baton Rouge

   8470 Goodwood Ave., 70806

For other areas, call the FAMSA office

Maine

Auburn Memorial Society of Maine
207-786-4323
   P.O. Box 3122, 04212-3122
 

Maryland

Bethesda Memorial Society of Maryland
800-564-0017
   9601 Cedar Lane, 20814
 

Massachusetts

Boston The Memorial Society
617-859-7990
   66 Marlborough St., 02116
 
East Orleans Memorial Society of Cape Cod
508-862-2522
   P.O. Box 1375, 02643-1375
800-976-9552
New Bedford Memorial Society of SE Mass.
508-994-9686
   71 Eighth St., 02740
 
Springfield Memorial Society of Western Mass.
413-783-7987
   P.O. Box 2821, 01101-2821
 

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