The Absentee (34 page)

'Nor I; but don't stare if you can help it,' said Anne. 'Get in, get in,
Mrs. le Maistre,' added she, as Lord Clonbrony now rose from the step,
and made way for them.

'Ay, in with you—in with you, Mrs. le Maistre,' said Lord Clonbrony.
'Good-bye to you, Anne, and take care of your young mistress at Buxton;
let me see her blooming when we meet again; I don't half like her looks,
and I never thought Buxton agreed with her.'

'Buxton never did anybody harm,' said Lady Clonbrony; 'and as to bloom,
I'm sure, if Grace has not bloom enough in her cheeks this moment to
please you, I don't know what you'd have, my dear lord—Rouge?—Shut the
door, John! Oh, stay!—Colambre! Where upon earth's Colambre?' cried her
ladyship, stretching from the farthest side of the coach to the window.
'Colambre!'

Colambre was forced to appear.

'Colambre, my dear! I forgot to say that, if anything detains you longer
than Wednesday se'nnight, I beg you will not fail to write, or I shall
be miserable.'

'I will write; at all events, my dearest mother, you shall hear from
me.'

'Then I shall be quite happy. Go on!'

The carriage drove on.

'I do believe Colambre's ill; I never saw a man look so ill in my
life—did you, Grace?—as he did the minute we drove on. He should take
advice. I've a mind, cried Lady Clonbrony, laying her hand on the cord
to stop the coachman—'I've a mind to turn about, tell him so, and ask
what is the matter with him.'

'Better not!' said Miss Nugent; 'he will write to you, and tell you—if
anything is the matter with him. Better go on now to Buxton!' continued
she, scarcely able to speak. Lady Clonbrony let go the cord.

'But what is the matter with you, my dear Grace? for you are certainly
going to die too!'

'I will tell you—as soon as I can; but don't ask me now, my dear aunt!'

'Grace, Grace! pull the cord!' cried Lady Clonbrony—'Mr. Salisbury's
phaeton!—Mr. Salisbury, I'm happy to see you! We're on our way to
Buxton—as I told you.'

'So am I,' said Mr. Salisbury. 'I hope to be there before your ladyship;
will you honour me with any commands!—of course, I will see that
everything is ready for your reception.'

Her ladyship had not any commands. Mr. Salisbury drove on rapidly.

Lady Clonbrony's ideas had now taken the Salisbury channel.

'You didn't know that Mr. Salisbury was going to Buxton to meet you, did
you, Grace?' said Lady Clonbrony.

'No, indeed, I did not!' said Miss Nugent; 'and I am very sorry for it.'

'Young ladies, as Mrs. Broadhurst says, "never know, or at least never
tell, what they are sorry or glad for,"' replied Lady Clonbrony. 'At
all events, Grace, my love, it has brought the fine bloom back to your
cheeks; and I own I am satisfied.'

'Gone! for ever gone from me!' said Lord Colambre to himself, as the
carriage drove away. 'Never shall I see her more—never WILL I see her
more, till she is married.'

Lord Colambre went to his own room, locked the door, and was relieved
in some degree by the sense of privacy; by the feeling that he could
now indulge his reflections undisturbed. He had consolation—he had
done what was honourable—he had transgressed no duty, abandoned no
principle—he had not injured the happiness of any human being—he had
not, to gratify himself, hazarded the peace of the woman he loved—he
had not sought to win her heart. Of her innocent, her warm, susceptible
heart, he might perhaps have robbed her—he knew it—but he had left it
untouched, he hoped entire, in her own power, to bless with it hereafter
some man worthy of her. In the hope that she might be happy, Lord
Colambre felt relief; and in the consciousness that he had made his
parents happy, he rejoiced. But, as soon as his mind turned that way
for consolation, came the bitter concomitant reflection, that his mother
must be disappointed in her hopes of his accompanying her home, and of
his living with her in Ireland; she would be miserable when she should
hear that he was going abroad into the army—and yet it must be so—and
he must write, and tell her so. 'The sooner this difficulty is off my
mind, the sooner this painful letter is written, the better,' thought
he. 'It must be done—I will do it immediately.'

He snatched up his pen, and began a letter.

My dear mother—Miss Nugent—'

He was interrupted by a knock at his door.

'A gentleman below, my lord,' said a servant, 'who wishes to see you.'

I cannot see any gentleman. Did you say I was at home?'

'No, my lord; I said you was not at home; for I thought you would not
choose to be at home, and your own man was not in the way for me to
ask—so I denied you; but the gentleman would not be denied; he said
I must come and see if you was at home. So, as he spoke as if he was
a gentleman not used to be denied, I thought it might be somebody of
consequence, and I showed him into the front drawing-room. I think he
said he was sure you'd be at home for a friend from Ireland.'

'A friend from Ireland! Why did not you tell me that sooner?' said Lord
Colambre, rising, and running downstairs. 'Sir James Brooke, I daresay.'

No, not Sir James Brooke; but one he was almost as glad to see—Count
O'Halloran!

'My dear count! the greater pleasure for being unexpected.'

'I came to London but yesterday,' said the count; 'but I could not be
here a day, without doing myself the honour of paying my respects to
Lord Colambre.'

'You do me not only honour, but pleasure, my dear count. People when
they like one another, always find each other out, and contrive to meet
even in London.'

'You are too polite to ask what brought such a superannuated militaire
as I am,' said the count, 'from his retirement into this gay world
again. A relation of mine, who is one of our Ministry, knew that I
had some maps, and plans, and charts, which might be serviceable in an
expedition they are planning. I might have trusted my charts across
the channel, without coming myself to convoy them, you will say. But
my relation fancied—young relations, you know, if they are good for
anything, are apt to overvalue the heads of old relations—fancied that
mine was worth bringing all the way from Halloran Castle to London, to
consult with TETE-A-TETE. So you know, when this was signified to me by
a letter from the secretary in office, PRIVATE, MOST CONFIDENTIAL, what
could I do, but do myself the honour to obey? For though honour's voice
cannot provoke the silent dust, yet "flattery soothes the dull cold ear
of AGE."—But enough, and too much of myself,' said the count: 'tell
me, my dear lord, something of yourself. I do not think England seems to
agree with you so well as Ireland; for, excuse me, in point of health,
you don't look like the same man I saw some weeks ago.'

'My mind has been ill at ease of late,' said Lord Colambre.

'Ay, there's the thing! The body pays for the mind—but those who
have feeling minds, pain and pleasure altogether computed, have the
advantage; or at least they think so; for they would not change with
those who have them not, were they to gain by the bargain the most
robust body that the most selfish coxcomb, or the heaviest dunce extant,
ever boasted. For instance, would you now, my lord, at this moment
change altogether with Major Benson, or Captain Williamson, or even our
friend, 'Eh, really now, "pon honour"—would you!—I'm glad to see you
smile.'

'I thank you for making me smile, for I assure you I want it. I wish—if
you would not think me encroaching upon your politeness and kindness in
honouring me with this visit—You see,' continued he, opening the doors
of the back drawing-room, and pointing to large packages—'you see we
are all preparing for a march; my mother has left town half an hour
ago—my father engaged to dine abroad—only I at home—and, in this
state of confusion, could I even venture to ask Count O'Halloran to
stay and dine with me, without being able to offer him Irish ortolans or
Irish plums—in short, will you let me rob you of two or three hours
of your time? I am anxious to have your opinion on a subject of some
importance to me, and on one where you are peculiarly qualified to judge
and decide for me.'

'My dear lord, frankly, I have nothing half so good or so agreeable to
do with my time; command my hours. I have already told you how much it
flatters me to be consulted by the most helpless clerk in office; how
much more about the private concerns of an enlightened young—friend,
will Lord Colambre permit me to say? I hope so; for though the length of
our acquaintance might not justify the word, yet regard and intimacy are
not always in proportion to the time people have known each other, but
to their mutual perception of certain attaching qualities, a certain
similarity and suitableness of character.'

The good count, seeing that Lord Colambre was in much distress of
mind, did all he could to soothe him by kindness; far from making any
difficulty about giving up a few hours of his time, he seemed to have
no other object in London, and no purpose in life, but to attend to our
hero. To put him at ease, and to give him time to recover and arrange
his thoughts, the count talked of indifferent subjects.

'I think I heard you mention the name of Sir James Brooke.'

'Yes, I expected to have seen him when the servant first mentioned a
friend from Ireland; because Sir James had told me that, as soon as he
could get leave of absence, he would come to England.'

'He is come; is now at his estate is Huntingdonshire; doing, what do
you think? I will give you a leading hint; recollect the seal which
the little De Cresey put into your hands the day you dined at Oranmore.
Faithful to his motto, "Deeds not words," he is this instant, I believe,
at deeds, title-deeds; making out marriage settlements, getting ready to
put his seal to the happy articles.'

'Happy man! I give him joy,' said Lord Colambre; 'happy man! going to be
married to such a woman—daughter of such a mother.'

'Daughter of such a mother! That is indeed a great addition and a great
security to his happiness,' said the count. 'Such a family to marry
into; good from generation to generation; illustrious by character
as well as by genealogy; "all the sons brave, and all the daughters
chaste."'—Lord Colambre with difficulty repressed his feelings.—'if I
could choose, I would rather that a woman I loved were of such a family
than that she had for her dower the mines of Peru.'

'So would I,' cried Lord Colambre.

'I am glad to hear you say so, my lord, and with such energy; so few
young men of the present day look to what I call good connexion. In
marrying, a man does not, to be sure, marry his wife's mother; and yet
a prudent man, when he begins to think of the daughter, would look sharp
at the mother; ay, and back to the grandmother too, and along the whole
female line of ancestry.'

'True—most true—he ought he must.'

'And I have a notion,' said the count, smiling, 'your lordship's
practice has been conformable to your theory.'

'I!—mine!' said Lord Colambre, starling, and looking at the count with
surprise.

'I beg your pardon,' said the count; 'I did not intend to surprise your
confidence. But you forget that I was present, and saw the impression
which was made on your mind by a mother's want of a proper sense of
delicacy and propriety—Lady Dashfort.'

'Oh, Lady Dashfort! she was quite out of my head.'

'And Lady Isabel?—I hope she is quite out of your heart.'

'She never was in it,' said Lord Colambre.

'Only laid siege to it,' said the count. 'Well, I am glad your heart did
not surrender at discretion, or rather without discretion. Then I may
tell you, without fear or preface, that the Lady Isabel, who "talks
of refinement, delicacy, sense," is going to stoop at once, and
marry—Heathcock.'

Lord Colambre was not surprised, but concerned and disgusted, as he
always felt, even when he did not care for the individual, from hearing
anything which tended to lower the female sex in public estimation.

'As to myself,' said he, 'I cannot say I have had an escape, for I don't
think I ever was in much danger.'

'It is difficult to measure danger when it is over—past danger, like
past pain, is soon forgotten,' said the old general. 'At all events, I
rejoice in your present safety.'

'But is she really going to be married to Heathcock?' said Lord
Colambre.

'Positively; they all came over in the same packet with me, and they are
all in town now, buying jewels, and equipages, and horses. Heathcock,
you know, is as good as another man, A PEU PRES, for all those purposes;
his father is dead, and left him a large estate. QUE VOULEZ VOUS? as the
French valet said to me on the occasion. C'EST QUE MONSIEUR EST UN HOMME
DE BIEN: IL A DES BIENS, A CE QU'ON DIT.'

Lord Colambre could not help smiling. 'How they got Heathcock to fall
in love is what puzzles me,' said his lordship. 'I should as soon have
thought of an oyster's falling in love as that being!'

'I own I should have sooner thought,' replied the count, 'Of his falling
in love with an oyster; and so would you, if you had seen him, as I did,
devouring oysters on shipboard.

'Say, can the lovely HEROINE hope to vie With a fat turtle or a ven'son
pie?

But that is not our affair; let the Lady Isabel look to it.'

Dinner was announced; and no farther conversation of any consequence
passed between the count and Lord Colambre till the cloth was removed
and the servants had withdrawn. Then our hero opened on the subject
which was heavy at his heart.

'My dear count—to go back to the BURIAL PLACE OF THE NUGENTS, where my
head was lost the first time I had the pleasure of seeing you—you know,
or, possibly,' said he, smiling, 'you do not know, that I have a cousin
of the name of Nugent?'

'You told me,' replied the count, 'that you had near relations of that
name; but I do not recollect that you mentioned any one in particular.'