I
do as he asks and allow his tongue to caress my own, moaning loudly when he
takes control and deepens our kiss. Our tongues swirl against one another as
our breathing quickens. His hands find their way inside my shirt, stroking my
bare skin before he reaches my breasts and squeezes them possessively.
“Cole…”
I pant breathlessly, delighting in the sound of his name on my lips.
“God,
I’ve missed this.” He groans deeply, picking me up off the floor so I can wrap
my legs around his waist. “I’ve missed you so much. I’ve been needing you for
so long.”
“Really?”
“You
have no idea how much. You don’t know how many hours I’ve been awake in bed,
driving myself crazy and longing for the heat of your body next to mine.”
I
don’t know what makes me think of it but the sudden image of Cole and the girl
I saw him with earlier flashes before my eyes, startling me enough to push him
away.
“Stop.”
I beg him. “Please stop.”
“What’s
wrong?” He asks me in concern, lowering me to my feet.
“It’s
that girl.” I confess, struggling to control my jealousy once again. “The one I
saw you with earlier outside of school. I need to know if she means something
to you.”
“Baby,
of course she doesn’t. I know that sounds terrible but she means absolutely
nothing to me. The only girl I want is you.” He assures me, staring at me
intently.
“So
why the hell were you making out with her?!” I yell at him in frustration, unable
to erase the picture I have of them together
“To
make you jealous.” He answers simply, sustaining his bemused expression.
I
know a part of him finds this humorous and this angers me even more.
“You’re
actually admitting it?”
“I
sure am.” He replies coolly, struggling to conceal his mischievous smirk.
“Cole,
that’s so cruel. Not just to me but to her as well.”
“Look,
I really don’t care about her.” He retorts carelessly. “I don’t care about any
of the whores who have tried it on with me this week. The only one I care about
is
you
.”
I
exhale slowly, clenching my fists as I try to remain dignified and rational.
There’s still so much which Cole and I need to discuss and there are still so
many problems we have yet to face. However, I’m also sensible enough to realise
that all of that can wait. At least until we’re far away from here.
“Just
go. Do what you have to do and come back for me.”
“Come
here.” He encourages me, pulling me into his strong embrace. “Only you, Green.
It’s always been you.”
It
takes me several minutes to pull myself together once Cole has left. I can’t
seem to think straight or figure out what it is I’m supposed to be doing. I
somehow pull myself together when I notice what time it is.
Two
o’clock.
It
spurs me into action and I race around my bedroom like a madwoman, scrambling
through my things as I start to bundle them inside a large bag I find. It
really doesn’t take me too long because I don’t own too many clothes and I have
nothing of sentimental value which I long to take with me.
The
only person on my mind is Lisa. No matter what was said between us, I can’t
just leave things like this. I want her to know that I’ll be ok and that none
of this is her fault. However, I also know how strongly Cole feels about
keeping this a secret.
Deciding
that the least I can do is send her a text, I reach for my phone. Wiping away
the rest of my tears, I sit down and send my best friend one final message.
Lisa, this is one
of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I love you so much and have far too
much to thank you for. You have been the greatest friend to me and I will
always be grateful to you for being there for me when no one else was. The
truth is… I’m leaving. I didn’t know I was but things have changed so suddenly.
I have to be with Cole. I love him so much despite everything and need to be
with him. I know you won’t understand this and I don’t expect you to. All I ask
for is your silence. Please, please don’t say anything to anyone about where
I’m going. I already know the police are after him for what happened at school
today and I expect you will know this as well by tomorrow morning. We don’t
have any chance of being together if we stay and this is the only way we can
live our lives freely and together. I don’t know when I will next be in touch
or how long it will be until we speak again but I promise I will make contact
with you again one day. You will always be my best friend, Lisa. Stay strong
and please respect my wishes. I love you.
Serena.
I
find it extremely difficult to stop my tears as I complete writing my final
goodbye to Lisa. It truly hurts that I won’t be able to explain things to her
in person but I can only hope she will understand my reasons and remain loyal
to my request.
Knowing
that will be back any minute now forces me to hurry up and check I haven’t left
anything behind. I know I shan’t be coming back here so I can’t afford to make
any mistakes.
“You
ready?” Cole asks, taking me by surprise when he bursts through my bedroom
door.
“Y-yes.”
I stutter nervously, taking one last glance around my bedroom.
“Ok,
we need to leave right now.” He urges me impatiently, picking up the large bag
at my feet. “You sure this is all you want to take? You know we can’t come back
for anything, right?”
“I
understand but what about my phone?”
“Leave
it. We take nothing they can use to trace us.”
I
nod my head in understanding and leave my phone behind, thankful that I decided
to delete the message I sent to Lisa before Cole came back. I don’t know
whether my mum might check through it when she realises I’m gone and I’m not
willing to take that risk.
Cole
grabs my hand as he leads me across the hallway and down the stairs, placing
his fingers on his lips as he escorts me through my front door.
“What
now?”
“See
that silver car on the corner?” He says, pointing out the vehicle he is talking
about. “We’re taking that.”
“You’ve
just stolen it?!” I demand outrageously.
“I
had no choice. How else do you think we would be able to get out of here
without being spotted? There’s already a warrant out for my arrest and we need
to get the hell out of here as fast as we can. People talk and it won’t be long
before the police come here to question you.”
“My
God, Cole.” I tremble violently, hugging my body in an attempt to stop myself
from shaking.
“Stay
strong, baby. We’ll be out of here soon.”
We
wait a couple more seconds before we race across the street towards the silver
car and get in it as quietly as we can.
“Whose
is it?”
“That
doesn’t matter anymore. It’s ours.” Cole states clearly, switching on the car’s
engine.
“Did
you drive over in this before you broke into my house?”
“No,
I picked it up once you agreed to come with me. I had to sort a few things out
before we left.”
“Such
as…?”
“Again,
that’s not important. All that matters is how much distance we put between us
and the police and the fact that we’re together now.”
The
two of us are silent for the next few minutes as we speed out of town so we can
reach the main roads. I have no idea where we are going or if Cole even knows
this himself. My overwhelming doubt and uncertainty dominate my thoughts,
twisting my stomach and heightening my paranoia as I keep thinking every car
behind us might be the police.
“Green,
you have to try and calm down. Everything is going to be ok.”
Cole’s
tone of voice is so reassuring. I’m sure he must use that deliberate and gentle
tone with me on purpose.
“You
promise?” I ask him uncertainly.
“I
promise.”
He
takes hold of my small hand in his and interlaces our fingers. I look down at
our clasped hands and smile at him weakly before I go back to staring out the
car window.
My
whole life consists of this town and the people in it and even though I haven’t
always been happy here, it is still the place I first met Cole.
I
don’t know what the road ahead of us looks like but what I
do
know is we
have each other. The man beside me crashed into my world like a tornado,
destroying everything in its path. He shattered my heart and made sure he was
the only one who knew how to place the broken pieces back together. He made me
fall in love with him and I had absolutely no control and no choice in the
matter.
I
eventually found out the truth about him and although it destroyed my world,
tainted our love and ruined the future I once thought we would share together,
it did not destroy
us
.
Yes,
he is my half-brother but the greatest revelation of all is I no longer care.
Present
day…
“Do
you wish to continue?” My therapist asks me, leaning forward in her seat with a
concerned expression on her face.
I
blink away my unshed tears, familiarising myself with the searing pain inside
my chest.
Heartbreak.
“Maybe
tomorrow.” I whisper softly. “I don’t think I can face anymore today.”
“That’s
perfectly understandable.” She assures me kindly.
“The…
the next part is difficult for me because it explains why he… why he still
hates me. It explains why it’s still not safe for me to approach him and why he
can never find out where I am.”
“So
long as you realise that we can do this at your own pace, Serena. I don’t want
to pressurise you into anything but I must make sure you understand the reasons
why you can never contact Cole again.” She reminds me firmly.
“I
understand.” I reply despondently, struggling to engage with her now that my
thoughts are elsewhere.
Now
they’re with him.
“Ok
then. We will continue with this tomorrow if you’re feeling strong enough.”
She
offers her hand out for me to shake but I just stare at it blankly, taken aback
by the formality of her gesture.
“I
haven’t felt strong in a long time.” I murmur quietly, averting my gaze to the
floor at her feet.
“Serena,
you’re a very brave young woman. You must remember this and remind yourself
that you did what you had to do to survive. There was no other option.”
“Wasn’t
there?” I challenge her boldly. “I betrayed the man I love. The man I
still
love. Do you know what that feels like?”
“Try
and get some rest, Serena. We will discuss this further tomorrow.”
She
stands up and leads me towards the door, offering me a tight smile before I
leave.
“I
told you that he once said I shed light on the darkness inside of him. He said
I took the fragmented pieces of his soul and put it back together again.” I remind
her, sighing deeply as I fight back more tears. “I know he feels differently
now. The last time I saw Cole he told me that he hated me. He said he despised
me for what I did to him and that he regretted every single moment he spent
with me.”
“Was
this before or after he swore to you he would never let you go? Was this before
or after he started chasing you and you had to go into hiding?” She questions
me, clearly trying to prove a point.
“Before.”
I reply faintly.
“That’s
my point, Serena. Cole doesn’t hate you. He has never hated you and that’s why
I need you to stop hating yourself.”
I
wait a few moments before I reply, trying to process the words she just spoke
to me.
“I
betrayed the man I love and for that… I can’t forgive myself.”
“Then
maybe you do need to stop hiding from him. He’s out there and he’s looking for
you, Serena. What if you can’t run from him forever?”
“I
know you’re right.” I murmur, agreeing with her wholeheartedly. “And that’s
what I’m afraid of.”
To be continued…
If
you are reading this right now then I want you to know how thankful I am. I
truly wish I could be there with you right now, face to face and discuss this
story. I want to know your thoughts, opinions, feedback and even your
suggestions for this story. The subject matter of this book is extremely
controversial and it really did take a great leap of faith for me to find the
strength to write it. I know that everyone will have their own opinion on a
topic like this and I am already expecting a division amongst my readers. I
cannot wait to hear back from you so please feel free to email me if you would
like to do so. My email address is
[email protected]
and I promise to
reply to each and every one of your emails. Please check out my author page on
Goodreads if you would like to find out about my progress, my writing and the
release date of part two. Cole and Serena’s story is far from over and I cannot
wait for you to experience the next chapter of their journey. I could thank you
all a thousand times over and it would never be enough. Thank you from the
bottom of my heart for taking a chance on my stories, my writing and my
imagination.
Love
always, Lauren.