That One Moment (Lost in London #2) (33 page)

I
glance outside my patio door to see Hayden leaning over the railing. His head hanging, his posture sagging. I turn to the clock.

11:11

I watch him carefully and can tell he’s doing his ritual. As much as I wish it didn’t, it feels like a personal strike to my heart. Last night was so tender, so meaningful, so completely intimate.

And then it wasn’t.

He held me afterward and asked me if I would be his date for Theo and Leslie’s wedding next weekend. I even laughed when he begged me to wear a red dress. He continued to whisper the most beautiful things in my ear as I drifted off to sleep, but never the three words I wanted to hear most from him.

God, how could I be so stupid? I held him over a barrel last night, asking to see his scars. Then I had to ruin everything by saying I love him. I thought once he opened his cuffs to me, things would change. No more barriers. No more shields. No more rituals. But there he stands, outside my flat, wishing away his past or his current life.

My stomach drops. My only hope is that what I have planned for today could be a turning point for him. If it is, then I’m even hoping he’ll come home with me for family dinner tomorrow night.

“You ready?” I ask as he comes striding in. I paint a happy smile on my face.

It feels forced until his hard grey gaze lifts to mine and his eyes warm with affection. God that smile. It makes me want to forget everything that happened last night and take him to the movies.

“Still not telling me where we’re going?” he asks, sliding his feet into his shoes.

What is it that’s so sexy about a man walking around barefoot in your flat? “It’s a surprise,” I wiggle my eyebrows playfully.

The cab drops us off in front of a familiar building in Notting Hill and Hayden cuts me a skeptical look. “Is Benji pissed again?”

I chuckle. “Nope.”

“Are we here because he wants to re-ignite our love connection?” he asks with a smug tone. “He was a pretty good kisser.”

I giggle and slide my hand into his. “Nope. Just have to trust me!”

We check in with the doorman and head up to the second floor toward Benji’s aunt’s flat. I smirk thinking about how cross Hayden was the night he helped me get Benji home after the gala. So much has changed in so little time.

I knock on the door and Agitha Abernathy opens it, looking a bit more put together than the last time I saw her. She’s a short round woman with ample bosoms concealed beneath a pink sweater set with cream trousers. Her hair is permed and sculpted to the shape of her head, looking as if an entire can of hairspray has set it to be so.

“Aunt Agitha,” I smile broadly. “Vi Harris. Thank you for agreeing to do this!” I reach out and shake her hand. “This is my…boyfriend…Hayden Clarke.” I bite my lip realising that’s the first time I’ve ever referred to Hayden as my boyfriend. The slip wasn’t lost on him either as the corner of his mouth lifts in appreciation.

Her chubby fingers grip Hayden’s large hand. She looks between the two of us. “Glad to see you two figured things out.”

I frown. “What do you mean?” I ask curiously.

She beams happily, “We’ll get to that. Come, come! And please, just call me Aggie.” She bustles us into her flat that looks like it’s a snippet of English Home and Country Magazine. My eyes widen as I see hutch after hutch after hutch filled with…“Salt and pepper shakers!” she sings, answering my silent question. “I’m a bit of a collector. I have a set dated back to King George the III! Do you want to see?”

After a polite amount of time oohing and aahing over her collection, she leads us into her kitchen. Benji is out of town, apparently at some comic book convention, which is just extra convenient for me. I would prefer not to have him around while we do this.

She offers us a seat at her round, retro-style table with sea foam green chairs and a white and green designed top. It’s a bright room with lots of natural light streaming in from the pigeon-scattered window. On the table she’s got some votive candle holders, a deck of tarot cards, and what appear to be some tuning forks.

“I haven’t told him why we’re here yet, Aggie, so just one second.” I turn and look at Hayden’s quizzical expression as he adjusts in his chair to face me. “Hayden, Benji’s aunt is a psychic.”

“Okay,” he replies slowly, his expression wary.

“She specialises in numerology.” I touch his arm encouragingly and he instinctively shifts closer to me.

“Interesting,” Hayden says politely, crossing his cuff-covered wrists over each other on the table.

“I thought we could talk to her about 11:11 a bit.” My eyes watch him as I see it all click together. His jaw clenches.

“All due respect, Miss Aggie, I’m not sure this is necessary.” He moves to stand up, so I reach out and hold him down.

“What could it hurt to just get a little background information on the number, Hayden? It could be really interesting.”

His jaw shifts side to side, but I see that look in his eyes. That look that shows how utterly difficult it is for him to ever say no to me. “Fine,” he snaps and shifts in closer to the table.

Aggie beams. “Brilliant! So tell me, what specifically did you want to discuss today, love?”

I look to Hayden who is doing his best to remain polite, but is visibly struggling with this. “Well, Aggie, my boyfriend here has a strong connection to the time 11:11, and I wondered what kinds of things you can tell us about the meaning behind that number. I assume you may have some insight.”

“Oh yes, certainly. I’ve studied numerology for many years and it is incredible how much it plays a part in our everyday lives.” She moves her glasses to the top of her head and leans her plump arms on the table as she continues. “Some say that 11:11 is the angelic hour. It’s when your angels can send you messages. Specifically noticing it on a regular basis is often times the Universe’s way of providing a wakeup call so to speak. It’s a sign that you’re about to embark on a journey of discovery.”

“How do you mean?” I ask, glancing at Hayden who seems to be listening intently.

“Well, often times, 11:11 can help you unlock parts of your subconscious that you have maybe been hiding from yourself or not sharing with anyone. It’s just a symbol to help you get in sync with the greater workings of the Universe. The Universe has a purpose for you. Whether you believe it or not, there’s a reason you’re alive!” She chuckles gaily.

I cringe slightly recalling how in Hayden’s speech, he said he chose the time 11:11 to slit his own wrists. I want to ask her about the meaning behind that, but I don’t want Hayden to feel completely ambushed.

“Why do people say to make a wish at 11:11?” Hayden demands, surprising me. I turn to look at him and he’s eyeing Aggie very seriously.

“Oh yes, that’s definitely what lots of people do when they see that time, isn’t it? Make a wish!” she snickers. “I think that began because 11:11 is a sign that our innermost thoughts are turning into reality, so you see it and you take control of making blessings in your life happen.”

“But what does it mean if you’re only wishing to change the past?” Hayden’s hand finds my knee beneath the table and he squeezes it for reassurance. I place mine over his.

Aggie’s face turns grave and I notice the stunning clear blueness of her eyes, almost as if they are colourless. They were so small when she was smiling before that I never got a good look. She reaches out and touches Hayden’s hand. The loose skin on her cheek tremors ever so slightly. “Your heart is heavy with a large burden, love. But you are seeing 11:11 for a positive reason that has everything to do with the present and your future, and nothing to do with your past.”

She cuts her eyes to me with a meaningful look. I pull back slightly. “What is it?” I ask.

“Her,” she gestures to me while looking at Hayden like he will get it. He remains still, so she looks to me again. “Tell me, Vi. Does 11:11 hold any significance to you?”

My face freezes. I didn’t expect her to turn this on me. I’m even more floored that she knows to ask me anything about it. I refuse to lie to Aggie when she was generous enough to do this for me, but I’m kicking myself for not telling Hayden all of this before we got here.

I nod.

“Well go on then, love, tell us,” she nods encouragingly at me, her transparent eyes sparkling with anticipation.

I swallow hard, the room suddenly feeling very still and quiet. The hum of the fridge halts and even the pigeons outside her window stop flapping about. “My mother died on November eleventh.”

She smiles knowingly, “And you have a special connection to your mother, correct?”

Nodding, I add, “I share a birthday with her.”

“And the two of you are Geminis, correct?” She beams.

My mouth opens. “Yes, my birthday is June fifth.”

“Oh, how funny,” she replies. “Six plus five equals—”

“Eleven,” Hayden finishes.

Aggie chuckles and begins shuffling through her papers. She pulls one out to show us. “Gemini is the Zodiac house of twins…symbolised here,” she points to the sheet. “See? Two pillars joined at the top and base, which is a representation of the twins seated side by side with embracing arms. Similar to an eleven, don’t you think?”

Hayden’s hand moves from my lap and I turn to him. His eyes are wide and accusing. “How could you not mention that about your mum?”

I shake my head nervously. “11:11 seemed so important to you and I didn’t want to scare you. You were already spooked over the fact that I live on the eleventh floor.”

“Oh!” Aggie chuckles. “The Universe is a wicked creature sometimes, isn’t she? This is all so perfect.”

“Perfect? Why?” I ask, looking back to her.

“Because you two are each other’s twin flame, of course!” Hayden and I continue to stare at her in confusion. She chortles, “I felt it plain as day when I first saw you the night you brought my naughty rat-arsed nephew home. Surely you two have sensed it since then. I couldn’t believe you held out as long as you did. That deep, burning, pulling connection is intense, isn’t it?” She twines her hands together in a powerful grip to visualise.

“What do you mean? What are twin flames?” I ask, my mind reeling.

“It’s like this…you’ve heard of soul mates, right? Well twin flames have an even deeper connection that supersedes soul mates. The moment you meet your twin flame is the moment the earth beneath your feet begins to shift.”

My memory flashes back to the night Bruce knocked Hayden over. The energy between us was just chemistry. An obvious physical attraction, nothing more. Yes, it was intense. More intense than with any man I’d ever met. But I thought that was just because it was Hayden. And Hayden is well…Hayden. I’m not all together sure I believe whatever it is Aggie is trying to say we are. “I’ve never even heard that term before,” I state dismissively.

“Twin flames are mirrored souls because they essentially reflect the deepest needs, desires, and dreams…even the dark elements of our souls. The yucky stuff. They can accept and absorb.”

A loud scratch echoes in the small kitchen as Hayden shoots up from his chair.

“Hayden!” I exclaim as he turns and strides out of the room. I look to Aggie with wide, apologetic eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

Her face looks crestfallen. “I’m sorry if I’ve spoken out of turn, love.”

“No, you did just what I wanted you to do. He’s just surprised. It’s been a very enlightening day. I think he’s just overwhelmed. Truly though, thank you.”

She nods, but her face still appears sympathetic. “It’s all right, love. You two take care.”

I nod and run out after Hayden, hustling down the stairs and out onto the busy Notting Hill road. Traffic whizzes by nosily as I step around a group of tourists hopping off a red, double-decker bus. “Hayden,” I shout as I see him storming down the sidewalk.

His shoulders tense at the sound of my voice, but he slows. When I get nearer, he turns his head and barks at me like a wild animal. “I hope you’re fucking happy, Vi.”

I recoil, clearly underestimating his reaction to Aggie’s reading. “What do you mean? Happy about what?”

His face pulls a menacing expression as he stops and turns to look at me. “We’re destined to be together, so now I’m all better. All healed. Isn’t that lucky for you.”

“Hayden, stop it.” I reach out to touch him, but he pulls back away from me.

“I don’t know what you were after in there, but whatever crap that scamming quack just told us is rubbish.” He grips one of his cuffs and shoots accusing daggers at me.

“She’s a nice woman, Hayden,” I retort, my tone defensive. “It wasn’t a scam. She did it as a favour. I didn’t even pay her.”

He scoffs loudly. “So now what? I’m just supposed to accept you as my twin flame and we go run off into our mythological future together, happily ever after? Life doesn’t fucking work like that, Vi.”

“I never said it does!” I exclaim, crossing my arms over my chest for some semblance of comfort. We’ve argued before, but never like this. “I was just trying to help you understand. I didn’t know she was going to say all that.”

He huffs out a mean, menacing laugh and a scary, dark cynicism shadows his eyes. “You just don’t get it, Vi. You haven’t suffered as I have. There’s no quick fix for me. There’s no easy bandage for my kind of pain.”